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Jedi Knight Miki ([info]jedi_miki) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2005-09-26 22:24:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:amused
Current music:The Llama Llama Song

Oh no you di'nt spoil that movie for me!
And no, I don't mean Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. This time, it's people whining about the upcoming Goblet of Fire movie (though there is a bit of HBP wank in there too). If you haven't found out who dies in the movie, don't read on. For the love of God, pick up your book and read it, since it's only five years old. Are you waiting for it to get as old as Lord of the Rings before you read it?

Anyway, a post is made in the livejournal community [info]ohnotheydidnt, showing a picture of dead!Cedric.

[info]starsprinkles shows up with the obligitory 'spoiler much?' comment. [info]evenstarfall steps up to the plate and mocks about the Half-Blood Prince spoilers.

People wank and opinions are thrown about. The most popular seems to be "If you haven't read the book yet, you deserve to be spoiled!".

And for some reason, [info]crematoria decides to get her mock Troll on by randomly posting HBP spoilers in huge, bold font.

Aside from the wankership, there are some pretty amusing pictures to be found, including these spoiler banners for HBP. My personal favorites are the crying kid banner by [info]silversolitaire and the Snape!Sephiroth and Dumbledore!Aeris movie by [info]amasaglajax.




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[info]mireille
2005-09-27 05:55 am UTC (link)
GoF is five years old--published in the summer of 2000. OTOH, I had people on my friends list screaming about being spoiled for the big events at the end of the LotR trilogy (not things that would have been changed from the book to the movie, either).

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]telesilla, 2005-09-27 06:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2005-09-27 06:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]batshitinsane, 2005-09-27 06:10 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 06:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jedi_miki, 2005-09-27 06:11 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 06:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dracolovesharry, 2005-09-27 07:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 08:14 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]giventofly37, 2005-09-27 08:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 04:30 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-29 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]prettyveela, 2005-09-27 06:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkrose, 2005-09-27 06:52 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lycoris, 2005-09-28 02:23 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 07:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkrose, 2005-09-27 09:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]squib, 2005-09-27 10:59 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 06:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]absurdwords, 2005-09-27 09:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]baskinglizard, 2005-09-27 01:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]so_long42, 2005-09-27 01:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tronella, 2005-09-29 05:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-29 09:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marlo, 2005-09-27 04:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]luthe, 2005-09-27 05:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]txvoodoo, 2005-09-27 05:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2005-09-27 06:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]iczer6, 2005-09-27 08:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2005-09-27 12:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]baskinglizard, 2005-09-27 01:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fairy_tale_echo, 2005-09-27 10:41 am UTC
(no subject) - sharonapple, 2005-09-27 08:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 11:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-27 03:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 01:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]memii, 2005-09-27 09:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]birdofjuno, 2005-09-27 04:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nostalgia, 2005-09-27 02:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jrandomlurker, 2005-09-27 02:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]your_face, 2005-09-28 06:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bakunina, 2005-09-28 07:45 am UTC
Joining in late - [info]_morrigan_, 2005-09-30 08:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jedi_miki, 2005-09-27 06:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2005-09-27 06:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pointsandlaughs, 2005-09-27 02:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2005-09-27 04:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pointsandlaughs, 2005-09-27 04:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]maev_connacht, 2005-09-27 04:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2005-09-27 07:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2005-09-27 07:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2005-09-27 09:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gabsy, 2005-09-29 02:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]agent_hyatt, 2005-09-29 05:19 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-29 06:43 pm UTC

[info]eljuno
2005-09-27 05:55 am UTC (link)
...Cedric.

*Weeps*

(Reply to this)


[info]plazmah
2005-09-27 05:57 am UTC (link)
Those spoiler banners scared me shitless because I wasn't expecting Daniel Whatshisname's face to be so scary and folded and large and in my face.

Someone hold me...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jerel, 2005-09-27 12:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2005-09-28 01:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]devils_devotion, 2005-09-28 12:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2005-09-28 01:35 am UTC

[info]slackerbitch
2005-09-27 06:00 am UTC (link)
Personally, I'm a big fan of [info]pointfivenine's pic of Snape on a bulldozer, maybe because he looks like he's dancin'. And the title "Harry Potter and the Dumbledore-Killin' Professor Snape" never fails to crack my shit up.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2005-09-27 06:05 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]khym_chanur, 2005-09-27 12:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - flightstothesea, 2005-09-27 10:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2005-09-27 02:52 pm UTC

[info]sorchar
2005-09-27 06:00 am UTC (link)
Well maybe some people haven't gotten into the harry potter fandom yet and maybe they belong to the community for other reasons besides all the harry potter goodness and now this person pretty much ruined the 4th book for them. I'm not pissed i'm just saying that kinda sucks man.

I'm sorry, but the book's been out for five years, kitten. If you haven't read it by now, too bad.

Is there a Jurisimprudence law governing the length of time one may reasonably expect others to make an effort not to post spoilers? There should be.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]krazycat, 2005-09-27 08:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2005-09-27 08:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]so_long42, 2005-09-27 11:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowan, 2005-09-27 06:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2005-09-27 08:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowan, 2005-09-27 09:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2005-09-28 02:23 am UTC

[info]felinephoenix
2005-09-27 06:02 am UTC (link)
Wow. I've having flashbacks to almost every wank in the animorphs comm.

Anyway, seriously...GoF came out years ago. If you're expecting not to be spoiled for a movie based on one of the most series ever, then you're just an idiot.

But those spoilers banners rock.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rotten_fish, 2005-09-28 02:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nights_mistress, 2005-09-28 04:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-28 06:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rotten_fish, 2005-09-28 06:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-28 08:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rotten_fish, 2005-09-28 10:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-28 02:07 pm UTC

[info]hristaesir
2005-09-27 06:04 am UTC (link)
I knew a guy who had no idea what happened in Final Fantasy 7 until he played through it like a week ago. He had somehow gotten this far in life without being spoiled for FF7. When my other friends and I realized this we carefully did not spoil him, as finding a gamer who isn't spoiled for FF7 living in your friend's apartment is kind of like finding a dodo in your backyard -- you knew they had those once but you're positive they don't make them anymore.

...then he got to the end of disk 1 and was crushed and we all laughed at him.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]artimusdin, 2005-09-27 06:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daromaius, 2005-09-28 06:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-28 08:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tardis, 2005-09-27 06:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hristaesir, 2005-09-27 06:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tardis, 2005-09-27 07:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mmanurere, 2005-09-27 06:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkrose, 2005-09-27 06:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]theladyfeylene, 2005-09-27 08:05 am UTC
Tifa is a life support system for boobs. - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 09:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sarracenia, 2005-09-27 07:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ianthefira, 2005-09-27 02:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]krazycat, 2005-09-27 08:07 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 08:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]slothrop, 2005-09-27 09:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2005-09-27 02:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]braisinhussy, 2005-09-27 05:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2005-09-27 08:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]braisinhussy, 2005-09-27 08:44 pm UTC

[info]felinephoenix
2005-09-27 06:06 am UTC (link)
Speaking of pics from the calendar, I can't wait 'til people get all spoolgey over the pic of Harry and Hermione after the second task. Any bets on who'll wank harder, the Harmoanians or the bitchy H/G fen?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2005-09-27 06:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2005-09-27 06:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rogue, 2005-09-27 07:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 02:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]entelodont, 2005-09-27 07:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 02:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rotten_fish, 2005-09-28 07:42 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-29 06:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jedi_miki, 2005-09-27 06:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 06:22 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 08:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]loopywafflehead, 2005-09-27 02:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 02:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2005-09-27 02:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 02:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shallow_kid, 2005-09-27 02:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]felinephoenix, 2005-09-27 02:46 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2005-09-27 06:16 am UTC (link)
Looking at the picture that started the wank and I'll my inner hidden slash fangirl can think is "OMFG! KISS ALREADY!"

And I don't even ship Cedric/Harry.

-Rin

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]skarch86, 2005-09-27 10:47 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 04:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]skarch86, 2005-09-28 10:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jaina, 2005-09-27 04:28 pm UTC

[info]senor_pinata
2005-09-27 06:27 am UTC (link)
Get over it, people. I read GoF on the way to my college orientation. I have received TWO degrees since then. The statute of limitations is UP.

(Reply to this)


[info]prettyveela
2005-09-27 06:30 am UTC (link)
Ok I'm torn.

Cedric's body is making one side of me go "wah!" but Daniel's "I'm about to take a shit!" face makes the other side go "hee!"

Daniel better step it up in this damn movie, he's been terrible so far.

"He was their friend....HE WAS THEIR FRIEND!"

Best laugh I had the whole PoA movie. XD

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]loopywafflehead, 2005-09-27 02:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]prettyveela, 2005-09-30 01:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]renata_hpjc, 2005-09-27 04:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]arien, 2005-09-27 08:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 01:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gmth, 2005-09-28 06:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hickorydickory, 2005-09-28 12:15 am UTC

[info]pokecheck
2005-09-27 07:09 am UTC (link)
Is anyone else kind of weirded out by the sheer immensity of Cedric's head compared to Harry's in that picture?

I was like, whoa there, Cedric, got head much?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2005-09-27 07:13 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 01:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sahz, 2005-09-27 07:29 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 08:08 am UTC

[info]wankprophet
2005-09-27 07:26 am UTC (link)
Okay, these "spoiler" bitchfests over things that were written years ago need to be balanced out with reality checks. So I'm going to spoil some of the wankers for important things now:

1) you're all going to die someday;
*1a) you won't, however, be dying in Snape's arms unless JKR sells the merchandizing rights to SexDolls Inc. Even then, you'll probably get rejected. Then you'll die in a bizarre compressed-air accident when you turn to the bicycle pump for solace. And, for some reason, reading this spoiler won't stop you from trying, though. Dumbass.

2) you will continue to consider sex the most fun you've ever seen people who aren't you have;
*2a) barring Tolkien rising from the grave to mate with Ann Rice and spawn an unholy alliance of high fantasy and vampire smut, those "other people" will continue to not be Legolas buttfucking Lestat while Aragorn does a corkscrew autofellatio genuflect whilst beating himself over the back with Legolas' bow.

3) taxes will remain inevitable. I'm sorry to spoil you for this, but...
*3a) the IRS will continue to audit you every time you try to claim "Harry/Hermione epileptic fits" as a medical deduction
4) somewhere, somehow, some day, somebody in your fandom will disagree with you on some issue about some thing that some nights you sometimes use to get some orgasms
*4a) you will die from it. Really. It will hurt. A lot. Don't make other plans. Trust me on this. Give up now and save us the effort of mocking you.

5) the world will keep on revolving. ::strains of "Turn, Turn, Turn" followed by strains of "Get Over It." ::
*5a) it will even do so if you die from hearing about Snape dying in Half-Blood Prince. This is not to say you're not the center of the world -- I'm sure, given the fucked-up state of the world today, you definitely are. But you will then become a rotting zombified core of pure molten wank. And the world will keep on revolving.

6) life will continue to be unfair;
*6a) especially for you. The universe hates you. So do the creators and writers of your fandom. They couldn't say why, mainly because they don't usually read Fandom_Wank.

Oh, sorry...**SPOILER ALERT FOR ABOVE TEXT**

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 07:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]absurdwords, 2005-09-27 09:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]expeliarbum, 2005-09-27 08:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 04:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]expeliarbum, 2005-09-28 04:31 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 04:23 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 06:27 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-29 04:04 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-28 08:02 am UTC

[info]sahz
2005-09-27 07:28 am UTC (link)
I looove "spoiler" posts. You always get really amusing threads with obvious spoilers that people should know (like the one at the top of this page) XD

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]frikatilhi, 2005-09-27 01:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-27 03:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-27 03:53 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2005-09-27 07:56 am UTC (link)
It's moments like this when I wish I could go back to December 2003 and stage an enormous hissyfit all over the internets claiming that I'd never, ever get over the disappointment of getting spoiled for the king's return in The Return of the King.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rogue, 2005-09-27 08:15 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2005-09-27 10:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jerel, 2005-09-27 12:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amasaglajax, 2005-09-30 07:22 am UTC

[info]onmyforehead
2005-09-27 08:26 am UTC (link)
This reminds me of Weekend Update a few years ago arounf the time CoS came out. Jimmy Fallon reported, "Warner Brothers announce Tuesday that an illegal copy of the second Harry Potter appeared on the internet just days before its release in theatres. Even worse, apparently a book containing the entire story of the film came out 4 years ago."

Ah the parallels...

(Reply to this)


[info]rachel
2005-09-27 09:26 am UTC (link)
Those spoiler banners are amazing.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2005-09-27 11:26 am UTC (link)
That community really brings out the wank, doesn't it? I'm surprised they don't make it here more often.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-27 03:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]expeliarbum, 2005-09-27 08:39 pm UTC

[info]azazello
2005-09-27 12:32 pm UTC (link)
Am I truly evil in that my first thought was, "And there is Dan showing all the usual emotional depth of a teaspoon."?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-27 03:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]azazello, 2005-09-27 07:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-29 01:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]terra_katta, 2005-09-27 07:27 pm UTC

dracothelizard
2005-09-27 02:35 pm UTC (link)
They should NOT bitch over Goblet of Fire spoilers. If they like Harry enough, they'll have read the books! And don't give me the 'no time' excuse. You can finish it in a couple of days.

You don't hear me whining about being spoiled for Stargate SG-1, do you? That's because I'm like 5 season behind on the US and get that I shouldn't expect people to only talk about stuff that happened ages ago. I avoid spoilers as much as I can, but sometimes it happens. Oh well.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mistal, 2005-09-28 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2005-09-28 10:58 am UTC

[info]wrongly_amused
2005-09-27 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Haha, that reminds me of when somebody bitched me out for mentioning that Harry becomes the Green Goblin in the future Spiderman movies. Because, of course, 30 years after the comic fact and 2 years after the movie's INTENSELY BLATANT FORESHADOWING been released, it's still a spoiler.

I never got the issue about spoilers. My sister flipped her shit when I accidentally told her that Sirius died. Meanwhile, I got spoiled for most of HBP and still liked it. I mean, what's the big fucking deal?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]luckdragonfujur, 2005-09-27 04:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-28 02:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]luckdragonfujur, 2005-09-28 03:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mirabellawotr, 2005-09-27 06:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2005-09-28 02:52 pm UTC

[info]narcissam
2005-09-27 04:07 pm UTC (link)
Please don't tell me my cousin's joined the fandom. The really annoying teenage cousin who gets mad when we discuss HP past Page 100 of GoF, because she's been reading it for five years.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]luckdragonfujur, 2005-09-27 04:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marlo, 2005-09-27 04:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]narcissam, 2005-09-27 07:15 pm UTC

[info]maev_connacht
2005-09-27 04:23 pm UTC (link)
Aww, and my iPod put on the Imperial March when I was scrolling through the image macros. Made it much funnier. I recommend it to all.

(Reply to this)


[info]antigone
2005-09-27 05:58 pm UTC (link)
Sorry if this has been mentioned but blackgarden winz @ teh internetz.

"Expiration date's passed on that spoiler.

P.S. Rosebud was his sled."

Iced tea, meet screen.

(Reply to this)

(Reply from suspended user)
(no subject) - [info]azazello, 2005-09-27 11:32 pm UTC



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