Send Your Wank
Sting/Police fandom has to erupt in fresh wank every few months. I could resist sharing this one no longer.

The stage is set when an mp3 of Sting's new single, "Send Your Love" (not to be confused with "Sending Our Love Down the Well" from The Simpsons many years back), starts spreading around P2P-land. Is it the actual album cut, a single edit, or a 3rd-party remix? No one knows for sure. No one really seems to care. They just want to wank all over the place about it. Between those who want to call him a greedy sell-out for "going techno" to those who will defend him blindly to those who mock the blind followers, it's all just too over-the-top to believe.

Just a few prime quotes:

"We didn't want limericks from Hemingway. We don't want pornography from Kurt Vonnegut. And we don't want techno from Sting."

"OK, it's crap... But come on, IT'S STING'S CRAP! ;-)"

"Looks as though a beaver has taken on the role of blind loyalist defender, ready to attack any negative opinion that makes it way into it's world filled with notions of Sting as a "genius". How sweet. "</i>

"It is superb!
A journey ,a fly on top of some magic tapestry!"

"I may have to become a U2 fan................ :("

As if all that wasn't enough, a beautifully wank-worthy excerpt from Sting's upcoming biography shows up, threatening to set off a whole new wave of pain. Oooooh, looks like it's going to be a very fun few months.

(Post a new comment)

ruaki
2003-07-01 07:22 am UTC (link)

O.o; I never even could imagine that there would be wank concerning Sting, whose flowery lyrics and gentle crooning most aptly suited to episodes of 'Touched By An Angel' never struck me as the type of genre to garner wank.

I stand corrected and am now deeply humbled by the levels wank sinks to. All hail the wank!

The U2 comment was just grand: not only does the poster compare this new single to something Clay Aiken did (oh oh oh he's bashing another fandom! Someone better tell that Aiken LJ Community!), but saying he's going to U2 is just... just... ::laughs!::

Personally, I'm just appalled at the grammatical and typing level of some of these wankers. But that's only closely followed by the elitists who feel they're betrayed by an artist trying to keep their name on the charts.

.. and I mean really. I like Sting and all--I own 'Ten Summoner's Tales'--but it's not like he's Pink Floyd or something. TEH DEEP MEANING OF HIS SONGS OMGWTFBBQ

But that's just me.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

sidewinder
2003-07-01 04:21 pm UTC (link)

I never even could imagine that there would be wank concerning Sting, whose flowery lyrics and gentle crooning most aptly suited to episodes of 'Touched By An Angel' never struck me as the type of genre to garner wank.

That's what any sane person might think, right? Sadly we manage to find any excuse to bring up old and new wank, from the old Sting vs. Stewart wars that never die to debating Trudie's latest hairstyle.

The U2 comment was just grand: not only does the poster compare this new single to something Clay Aiken did (oh oh oh he's bashing another fandom! Someone better tell that Aiken LJ Community!), but saying he's going to U2 is just... just... ::laughs!::

There were also scathing remarks made dissing Justin Timberlake (every rock fanboy's favorite whipping boy) and Madonna, of course. Actually I've lost track of how many people got ragged on thanks to this one. Freaking. Song.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

	parlance 2003-07-04 09:42 am UTC (link)
	O.o; I never even could imagine that there would be wank concerning Sting, whose flowery lyrics and gentle crooning most aptly suited to episodes of 'Touched By An Angel' never struck me as the type of genre to garner wank. Watch an interview with him some time. Wankers aspire to his level of wank. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	croupier 2003-07-01 08:54 am UTC (link)
	I had no idea this was even a fandom. Please tell me there isn't Sting/Stewart slash. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	sidewinder 2003-07-01 04:15 pm UTC (link)
	Please tell me there isn't Sting/Stewart slash. Erm... :: cough :: I'm sorry, I stand guilty as charged. :: facepalms :: (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	croupier 2003-07-01 09:55 pm UTC (link)
	Hee! g Your logic ties me up and rapes me! Or them, as the case may be! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	pipssister 2003-07-01 03:58 pm UTC (link)
	"We didn't want limericks from Hemingway. We don't want pornography from Kurt Vonnegut. And we don't want techno from Sting." But... but... I want pornography from William Shakespeare. Of course, "Venus and Adonis" might already have that covered... (Reply to this)(Thread)

	aruru 2003-07-02 07:06 am UTC (link)
	Don't forget the continuous "Is Mercutio gay or not?" debate... (Reply to this)(Parent)