World of Warcraft Wanker: "Bouncing Boobies Bad!"
Here at F_W, we all like boobies, right? Especially bouncing boobies? Well, WoW player wanker Lumen is clearly not one of us:

I think the [female Nightelf's hop] animation should be taken out of the game entirely and replaced with a new one. Either that, or turn it into an emote. The animation is involuntary and it's existance just damages the reputation of the female Nightelves, Blizzard and their MMORPG. A lot of the /silly voice clips are pretty obscene too, but they're not involunary like the Nightelves bounce animation; hence, why I don't have an issue with them.

(snip)

Why does the female Nightelf have to be synonymous with sex? Why can't some of you understand that there's players out there who don't want their female Nightelf to look like a call girl? The animation looks out of place and ridiculous. All I ask is for you guys to allow us (the players) to choose whether or not we want to do the boobie bounce.

Lumen also wants us to know that he is "a male player with a girlfriend," just in case anyone might equate his dislike of the jiggling mammaries with Teh Gay.

Twenty-three pages of titty wank ensue. Highlights of the jug jizz:

Krile: First off the game is rate T for Teen and the animation you are talking about is nothing you would not see at a high school sports game with the cheerleaders. It is in no way linked to sex you are the one who is linking it to sex.

Mydria: Lumen you have some serious psychological issues if you think bouncing = sex.

Little girls bounce all the time when they get excited or sometimes bored. Its just cute and it ends there. So if mentally you take it further then that then you should seek out professional help.

Mailpouch: Maybe you haven't really observed women very well but lots of women when they get excited about something or are happy to hear something, many do a little bouncy "I'm so happy!" dance.

Like the two posters above me, it doesn't mean sex, its all your perception on it.

Lumen: It's not a "i'm bouncing because I'm happy dance" it's a "look! I have boobs and so I will bounce dance!". And besides, they already have a happy dance.

And that's just on the first page. Then we have the typical installation debate: "Uninstall the game if you don't like it!" "No, I shouldn't have to uninstall!" Lumen points out that his post is on the Suggestions Forum, so he has every right to, oh, make a suggestion, to which others reply that they have every right to disagree with his suggestion. Xiria suggests that Blizzard allow everyone to bounce (yeah!). Religion makes its requisite appearance. The definition of the word "idiot" is debated. A bunch of people blame the middle schoolers for hijacking the kerfluffle and for bumping the thread. Endless debate ensues over who wins, who is stupid, who is retarded, and who should quit fucking talking. And people, including the OP, beg others to let the thread die, but can't resist coming back for more themselves.

More highlights:

Bodard: the female mammary gland is a part of human anatomy, it has, when walking, a tendancy to bounce. To take it out of the game would be denying the laws of physics. Maybe Blizzard should develop a sports bra so there is no bounce?

Nicole: I've seen my share of porn and near-porn flicks. If I recall correctly, bouncing breats are very often used to tantilise and tease.

Splintercel: haha u said u were an elder at ur church in ur post about naming conventions. Typical online liar!

Nicole: (gives out his(?) name and church position information and instructs other wankers as to how they can go about getting his e-mail address by calling the Branch President at his church)

Kelicure: I really don't like you, but you do know you can get banned for this, right?

Even if you're soliciting your own personal information, you can and will be banned.

So... despite the fact that I think you should eat dirt, avoid this. No reason to lose your account.

Later, Kelicure and Nicole wank about polygamy and whether Mormons can drink soda.

Splintercel (to Lumen): First of all, you're making a complete ass outta urself by complaining over a harmless thing. Any girl that would hook up with u must be ugly as sin and u 2 only wound up together because u both realized u 2 were the best u could get. and as for "getting some," you'd probably have to be pretty messed up to give it to that cow.

Cid (to Lumen): you perverted son of a #@%$!. you got caught masterbating to the NE dance and bounce by your girlfriend and she forced you to make this thread as punishment.

Mydria: Thats like having an argument that gray is not black. Then in the middle of it saying oh by the way if you spell gray back wards you get yarg, so why they called it gray instead of something else that has a cooler word when spelled back wards is beyond me. Just thought I'd like to mention that so I can cover gray as whole and all aspects of it even though it has nothing to do with my argument. Meanwhile back to my argument about gray not being black.

Jonjak: I personally would like to see more sex, drugs, swearing, violence (can never have enough) in computer games.

I am but a small voice amongst the masses though.. please blizzard.. I want hawt secks and nudity, I want swearing, I want drug use (I guess there already is, isn't there? After all, that's what alchemy is for).. I want to be able to kill more then just male farmers.. I want to kill their families and burn their houses to the ground. It's unrealistic having a whole farming community full of male farmers and the occasional cow. I want to ride into hillsbrad with some other wolf-mounted orcs, charge in there and slaughter them all. Kick doors down, slay the humans.. kill them all, burns their houses to the ground. =D

Catela: You,re like that girl whining about valentine day in wow...

Eleanor: Oh god, I hated that b****... (snip) Go get a girlfriend, and stop being offended by pixels. Or go join the Lonely Hearts club, along with the women who wanted to destroy Valentine's Day.

All this boobie wank makes me want to do a little happy dance. With lots of bounce and jiggle.