Chemical wank!
(First post. Don't kill kthnx.)


My Chemical Romance bassist Mikey Way apparently hooked up with some girl named Alicia Simmons, who in true wanker fashion was immediately hated by scene kids all over the planet. People flock to ohihatealicia to complain about their favourite asthma-boy's sudden happiness.

Mikey discovers the community, is understandably shocked, and reacts with the good ol' classic dictionary definitions on his MySpace. Despite the lack of complaints and some overwhelming "awww tahts so sweet" and "oh mikey we agree!!!1", he feels the urge to state the obvious just one more time.



I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor opens with: "Just to make it clear, not everyone in that group hates her though. I'm in it only because I'm tired of fangirls who kissup to her for just being your lovah. Many people believe that doing that will get them closer to you. I mean, even if she is a REALLY nice person, she hasn't really done much t deserve faclubs. Did you notice how they only started appearing once she started dating you?"

ANYONE!at the disco will be SHOT (whose username wins the internets) offers some of her ancient wisdom to Mikey, too: "child, they're just jealous."

And even little Maggie offers her support: "FOR REALLY I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE WHO START HATEING ON MY FRIENDS OR FAMILY MEMBERS!"

Six pages total of spooge later (and five more over at Alicia's blog), Mikey finally decides to never mention this again.

However, he does assure the fans that he does not have asthma after all and also is not bisexual. ...Maybe. Why, Mikey, with thousands of 12-year-old girls slashing you with your big brother, how can this possibly be a bad idea?