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Brucha ([info]mindset) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2006-05-19 15:25:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:Impish
Current music:Luki Ski - Fanboy

Battlestar Galactica spoiler wank
Nabbed from [info]wank_report, and posting by request of an accountless friend who thinks BSG fandom is shamefully overlooked by F_W. Note: I don't follow BSG, so apologies for any errors. This is a near-copy of the report with links and spelling fixed; the "I" refers to the anon who reported.

--
Ah, Battlestar Galactica never fails.

I'll warn up front the wank is about spoilers and there are spoilers for BSG Season 3 in here.

Meet Michael Hinman, he writes for the site syfyportal.com.

He wrote an article about some spoilers/rumors for BSG season 3. So far so good. Then he posted a teaser and link at the BSG News community on LJ.

Problem is, both the subject line of the post and the teaser he wrote spoiled two things that will happen. Several posters asked him if could please put that under a spoiler cut since many people are trying to stay spoiler free. He does not take this request well.

He argues and argues with everyone there. The number and length of his posts is something else. I don't want to post highlights here since most of them relate to the spoilers in question. I'm polite like that. I will share a few of his gems.

"Oh, and another spoiler ... BSG is coming back for a third season in October."

"I am too busy of a person to get into a point-by-point debate with anyone."


I believe this may the best post of the thread:

"So, do you tell pro-choice advocates that to be polite to the unfair demands of other people, they should be pro-life? How is completely giving in to the bitches of two people, and some add-on somewhere, being polite? If your life isn't exciting enough that you have to create some drama, create it with someone else's post. Not mine."

The mod chimes in here, and it only increases the wank.

Nevertheless, michaelhinman edits the first post to put it under a cut -- but neglects to change the subject line, which is still spoilery.

He also continues wanking and wanking. When in doubt attack people for not posting with their REAL NAMES:

"Oh please spare me. It takes NO guts to come onto an online forum with a fake name like "HRLO" and attack someone because of some strange desire to have drama in their lives. I came and simply posted something from the site, which had a BSG news story, into a community that I have been a part of that publishes ... guess what!! ... BSG news."

--

And per the request of the commenters here, don't miss 50 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Michael Hinman!



(Post a new comment)


flightstothesea
2006-05-19 10:57 pm UTC (link)
Why do people respond to their own post? I will never understand that.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2006-05-19 11:01 pm UTC (link)
This is pretty much the best wank ever, because it's deliciously full of Michael Hinman explaining that he has NO TIME AT ALL to talk to THESE IDIOTS, and then he responds at great length many, many many times.

Also, I would really love it if there's any way Michael Hinman's personal website could be added to the above post:

http://www.syfyportal.com/michaelhinman/

Because it's awesome. AWESOME. The absolute best part is the "50 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Michael Hinman" trivia section:

http://syfyportal.com/michaelhinman/know.html



(Reply to this)(Thread)


morwen_peredhil
2006-05-19 11:08 pm UTC (link)
19. Family was one of first in hometown to own a VCR, a microwave oven and an Atari game system.

Pure. Comedy. Gold.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-19 11:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:16 pm UTC

[info]mindset
2006-05-19 11:17 pm UTC (link)
Got it. Any other edits or comments to pick out, just let me know.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 12:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-05-20 03:14 am UTC
(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2006-05-20 12:36 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 02:02 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 04:13 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 06:01 pm UTC
Saying you're pro-choice equals agreeing to LJ-cut spoilers?
[info]varia_lectio
2006-05-19 11:02 pm UTC (link)
Wow. I never knew.

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things doesn't belong...

This wins the LJ comm, though...

Wow. Too busy to get into a point-by-point debate, but not too busy to post all that, eh? Thanks. You just told me all I needed to know.

(Reply to this)


[info]phosfate
2006-05-19 11:03 pm UTC (link)
Why do these dinks always manage to churn out a dozen paragraphs of abuse while claiming they don't have the time to make a minor edit in a post?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]waterfront, 2006-05-19 11:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2006-05-19 11:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 12:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2006-05-20 12:33 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 12:37 am UTC

[info]snacky
2006-05-19 11:05 pm UTC (link)
Man, you just beat me to it.

Don't forget his personal site, which he put up so he wouldn't have to answer all the same questions his fans internet gawkers psychologists friends ask him all the time. From the FAQ:

So, tell me, are you married or dating?
Right now, I'm on the market. I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. But hey, if you come across this and want to say hello ... please do so! Just drop me an e-mail!

Do you like girls or guys?
Well, that's an odd question to be asking here, don't you think?


THANK GOD, it also includes 50 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Michael Hinman! Such as:

6. In seventh grade, did phone banking for the Michael Dukakis Presidential campaign of 1988.

Oh, man. Full-on hilarity, all because someone couldn't say, "Oh, sorry, I didn't think it was a spoiler, but no problem, I'll edit it."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-19 11:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-19 11:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-19 11:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]white_serpent, 2006-05-19 11:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 06:40 am UTC
(no subject) - flightstothesea, 2006-05-19 11:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - flightstothesea, 2006-05-19 11:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffee_mug, 2006-05-20 12:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2006-05-19 11:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-19 11:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 01:56 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 12:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2006-05-20 01:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-05-20 03:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2006-05-20 02:56 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2006-05-19 11:15 pm UTC (link)
*glees*

I love that he's so proud of his intellect, yet is unable to parse a possible solution that the hrlo username reference there, explained by the poster to refer to their own name, is H.R. Lo. No, because in his world, you need to spell these things out in full.

~~ ancarett

(Reply to this)


[info]aqua_blurr
2006-05-19 11:25 pm UTC (link)
#1 on the list of trivia facts: "I love drama."

Yes, yes, you do. And you're so good at it. You are making me so happy right now.

(Reply to this)


[info]white_serpent
2006-05-19 11:27 pm UTC (link)
I'm reading his list and all I can say is...

I would like to introduce him to Monroe Mann! I wonder if Michael Hinman would be eligible to join the ultra-special elite club for "famous" people?

They'd be perfect together!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 04:44 am UTC

[info]innsmouth_eyes
2006-05-19 11:58 pm UTC (link)
Battlestar Galactica wank: It's like abortion, in a way.

Sorry, had to do it.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-21 01:08 am UTC

[info]ravenscanary
2006-05-20 12:02 am UTC (link)
That's hilarious...

"I DON'T NEED TO PUT IT UNDER A CUT IT'S NOT A SPOILER YOU FUCKING WANKERS OMG WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PUSSIES OVERREACTING I'M GOING TO QUOTE THE RULES AT YOU UNTIL YOUR EARS BLEED BECAUSE GOD KNOWS I COULD BE TALKING ABOUT ANYONE OR ANYTHING IN THESE VAGUE COMMENTS YOU'RE ALL JUST A BUNCH OF..."

"Mod? You don't? Okay, it's cool, man. For you, under a cut. Less than three you, dude. Less than three you."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 12:39 am UTC

vomitymcpuke
2006-05-20 12:18 am UTC (link)
I wish I could find a Canadian BSG board/community/whatever. We're half a season behind, dammit.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]msmongi, 2006-05-20 02:59 am UTC
(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2006-05-20 04:42 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 05:09 am UTC
(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2006-05-20 05:32 am UTC

[info]aegflota
2006-05-20 12:42 am UTC (link)
The season will have something getting destroyed and someone dying!

Wow, who would've thought it'd be like the last two seasons? I hate to say it and spoil the rest of you, but there might be some shiny robots with issues as well.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2006-05-20 12:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fevered_ego, 2006-05-20 04:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aegflota, 2006-05-21 03:23 am UTC

[info]stella_polaris
2006-05-20 01:28 am UTC (link)
I'm just waiting for the Da Vinci Crap wank to begin.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nlb_muffin, 2006-05-20 01:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]stella_polaris, 2006-05-20 01:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-05-20 02:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2006-05-20 03:38 am UTC

[info]nlb_muffin
2006-05-20 01:42 am UTC (link)
Dude, three people have complaints that aren't more than a few sentences, and he flips his shit and makes several subsequent tl;dr posts. And who is the one trying to start drama here?

45. AOL Buddy List on master screenname never has had any less than 50 people on it in the nearly five years this account has been maintained. It's peak was 134.

... I have 86 people. I talk to about seven of them.

49. Shook hands with President Bill Clinton and Vice President Al Gore in the same day.

In the same day?! Surely not!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]panthea, 2006-05-20 01:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2006-05-20 01:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]panthea, 2006-05-20 02:03 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2006-05-20 01:46 am UTC (link)
He also posted a link to an interview he did with one of the writers. He said himself that it has no season 3 spoilers. Yet he posted a link to thesecretcylon, which is the BSG spoiler comm.

Can't seem to understand why the mod would take issue. After all, season 2 hasn't aired in other parts of the world.

http://community.livejournal.com/thesecretcylon/42666.html

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 02:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-05-20 03:12 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 10:43 am UTC

[info]seraphtrevs
2006-05-20 03:19 am UTC (link)
Why do I have a sinking feeling he might show up here?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2006-05-20 03:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 03:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nlb_muffin, 2006-05-20 04:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 04:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]seiberwing, 2006-05-20 04:50 am UTC
In Which We Graciously Await Company... - [info]fevered_ego, 2006-05-20 04:16 pm UTC

[info]aerobot
2006-05-20 03:37 am UTC (link)
It's so cute when netizens try so hard to be holier-than-thou assholes. You can almost hear them giggle as they type.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 05:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2006-05-20 08:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 08:46 am UTC

(Anonymous)
2006-05-20 06:15 am UTC (link)
So, did he just invoke Snacky's law here? In the ballpark at least.

If you want to turn this into junior high, then please do. But do it without me.

http://community.livejournal.com/bsg_news/118539.html?thread=239627#t239627

My favorite part is that this is "Part 2" of his reply to the previous post. Part 2!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-20 06:35 am UTC

[info]la_viv
2006-05-20 08:46 am UTC (link)
Nothing important, but I dig the icon. I was singing along. Fer reals.

Thanks for that, by the way. Can't get it out of my head now.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-05-21 06:12 am UTC

[info]kenboy
2006-05-20 01:40 pm UTC (link)
Wow, this guy is an ASSHAT.

That being said, that has got to be the least spoilery spoiler in the history of spoilers. Let it go, people.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]fernwithy, 2006-05-20 08:25 pm UTC

[info]esseilte
2006-05-20 03:35 pm UTC (link)
I'm willing to forgive him, because this wank led me to a spoiler which put me in a good mood. I'm shallow like that.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2006-05-20 06:29 pm UTC (link)
He responds in his own lj to all the harassment

the injustice of it all (http://michaelhinman.livejournal.com/185343.html)

I think Ysrith may have upset him somewhat.

BTW last update from there is that she gave in and banned him, after he threatened her with law-suits for copy-right violations

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - morwen_peredhil, 2006-05-20 07:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 08:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 08:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 08:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - morwen_peredhil, 2006-05-20 09:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-20 10:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2006-05-21 12:12 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-05-21 04:21 am UTC

[info]annavtree
2006-05-20 10:36 pm UTC (link)
I love that he declares that WWII and the Civil War were important events in World and American history. I can't believe that the academic community didn't snap this guy up. I, of course, am only a poor student of Latin American history and didn't even know that these events had been declared important until I read the 50 things list linked above.

What would I do without the education that fandom_wank provides me?

(Reply to this)


 
   
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