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Miv ([info]eyesdelight) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,
@ 2006-05-31 08:54:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Non-Pern Related Dragon Wank
What is it about dragons and the act of riding them that sets the spooge flying?

Naomi Novik writes historical fantasy. Her Temeraire series is set during the Napoleonic Wars in a universe where dragons exist. The books are damn fine reads with delightfully slashable characters, but why oh why do they attract the crazies?



Meet dracochronicler. Over on the LJ comm temeraire_fans, he/she/it has been stirring up shit from near the beginning of the comm's inception. Fair spoiler warning. All the links have discussion on Novik's books up the wazoo.

Post #1: I liked the book except the parts where... in which DC complains in tl;dr fashion about how the first book could be improved. Because, you know, fans have the God-given right to dictate how authors should write their books. Right, HP fandom? The main point I gathered from the post (before my eyes started to cross from the sheer length and unreadability of the thing) is that dragons are too smart to be harnessed into military service by humans, and they should be the dominant Earth species. Reaction to the initially not LJ-cut rant is decidedly mixed, with most of the earlier comments asking the OP to cut the damn thing for length and for spoilers. adora_spintriae puts it best, I think: "Christ, could you at least cut this tl;adr, please? If not for the length and spoilers, then for the pompousness."

And they're off! In one thread, DC manages to insult the anthrocentric (what???) views of a naysayer as well as the world-building skills of fantasy writers in general, pissing off Tolkien fans in the process. z_rayne runs into the Great Hall screaming "Troll!" But DC can't be the troll! "It is YOU who are the troll!"

Post #2: OMG This happens in the second book, which the majority of you haven't read yet!. Another non-cut diatribe questioning why the dragons aren't treated as equals to humans. Reaction to it is once again mixed, though leaning towards "cut this for spoilers damn you!" bakedneudel decides to be snarky while DC calls "troll" and blames the earliness of the post for any typos. Except, as sodzilla points out, the Internet is open 24 hours a day, and somebody is always watching!

DC even manages to threadcrap on a piece of fanfic written by penknife, by dropping a spoiler for the next book in the comments. And he doesn't understand why an albino dragon would be an outcast in China. Not like the explanation in the book (the color white is symbolic of death and mourning in Chinese culture) made any sense at all. *seethes*

But we're not done yet. Behold DC's attempt at Temeraire fanfic, in all its unbeta'ed glory! The fic was written to "fix" some inconsistences in the books, but DC is apparently scared to death of using the word "said" and dislikes writing actual action in with the dialogue. This results in 108 comments of pure, unadulterated wank. I haven't even gotten through all of the comments yet, but DC thinks he is OMGoppressed by the squeeing fangirls who couldn't take any criticism of "teh kyoot widdle dwaggons n' Teh Hawt Hawt characters who must be all over with teh mansexx."

And then there's my little contribution. I was curious about where the Americas fit in this universe, and, idealistic little me, I posted in hopes of starting up honest discussion. And cue the wank.

I just know there's a good fandom community lurking in there someplace; I'm trying very hard to find it.

ETA: And the mod steps in...while intheyear2004 kinda misses the point.



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[info]hickorydickory
2006-05-31 07:45 pm UTC (link)
What is it about dragons and the act of riding them that sets the spooge flying?

*Tent peg reference goes here*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Curses! - [info]darkeyes, 2006-05-31 07:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]greenling, 2006-06-02 04:28 am UTC

[info]darkeyes
2006-05-31 07:48 pm UTC (link)
Dear god! His first post....it-it just goes on and on and on...




...and on and on.

(First Comment YAY!)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ashenmote, 2006-05-31 08:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]roz_mcclure, 2006-05-31 08:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-31 08:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dorothy1901, 2006-05-31 08:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2006-05-31 09:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2006-05-31 11:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sisterelwood, 2006-05-31 09:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]polygamouse, 2006-05-31 10:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ashenmote, 2006-05-31 10:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]v_digitalwytch, 2006-06-01 08:02 am UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2006-05-31 09:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]girlbruce, 2006-05-31 10:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]reeve, 2006-06-01 01:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]freezer, 2006-06-01 08:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]meril, 2006-06-01 11:22 am UTC
(no subject) - catatonia, 2006-06-01 11:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_reda, 2006-06-01 02:07 pm UTC

[info]yattara
2006-05-31 07:54 pm UTC (link)
He did not. He pulled out the 'I'm a bigger fan than the rest'-card. I hate when people do that. Is there a law for that?

Not familiar with the books at all.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]honorh, 2006-05-31 08:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2006-05-31 08:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2006-05-31 08:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2006-06-01 05:56 am UTC

[info]ecchaniz0r
2006-05-31 07:55 pm UTC (link)
The War of 1812 wank is making my skull ache.

Yes, guys, Canada did exist back then in a sort of foetal state. We weren't just teh oh em gee British oppressorz - read an outsider history book or two and get the whole story thx?

No, nobody was the good guy; everyone was an opportunistic dickhead, now shut the fuck up and accept the fact that the Brinadians won that little historical dickswinging contest and move. The fuck. ON. you IDIOTS.

P.S. no, the USA didn't win either World War singlehandedly. Stop making your poor countrymen look fucking stupid!

...Sorry. Pet peeve.

*cleans up after self*

Back on topic: DC is a thimbledong, and theyear2004 is just as obnoxious. I smell two petty fanboys who've never been laaaaiiiid. </asshole>

Also: your 'Americas?' post woulda' made a damncool discussion topic.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]heddychaa, 2006-05-31 08:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2006-05-31 09:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]polygamouse, 2006-05-31 10:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2006-06-01 01:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-06-01 02:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]polygamouse, 2006-06-01 03:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-06-01 01:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2006-05-31 10:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2006-05-31 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2006-05-31 10:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - dracothelizard, 2006-05-31 10:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2006-05-31 10:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2006-06-01 01:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2006-06-01 01:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]v_digitalwytch, 2006-06-01 08:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]drhenryjekyll, 2006-06-05 07:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]avari, 2006-06-01 12:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_reda, 2006-06-01 02:14 pm UTC

[info]hooverdam
2006-05-31 07:55 pm UTC (link)
Naomi Novik writes historical fantasy. Her Temeraire series is set during the Napoleonic Wars in a universe where dragons exist. The books are damn fine reads with delightfully slashable characters, but why oh why do they attract the crazies?

Pretty sure you just answered your own question there, chief.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]m_butterfly, 2006-05-31 09:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]drakyndra, 2006-06-01 11:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vyazka, 2006-06-01 09:20 pm UTC

[info]kadath
2006-05-31 07:56 pm UTC (link)
Someone's identifying a leeeeeeetle too closely with dragonkind, there.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]beccastareyes, 2006-05-31 08:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2006-05-31 08:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-06-01 02:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kadath, 2006-05-31 08:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yaoiko, 2006-06-01 01:39 am UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-04 01:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]yaoiko, 2006-06-06 02:44 am UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-06 02:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]belafarinrod, 2006-06-01 12:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hypno_jango, 2006-06-01 12:55 am UTC

[info]roz_mcclure
2006-05-31 08:00 pm UTC (link)
That fic is...okay, I didn't read it, but I scrolled past it, and holy Jesus on a Christmas cracker.

So, if I may boil it down:

DC: The book was wrong and an inaccurate pastiche of 19th-century novel writing! I shall fix it! With my super-historical knowledge and geeeeeeenius!
EVERYONE ELSE: Because clearly strict adherence to the Dickens school of writing was what she was going for.
DC: YOU DO NOT APPRECIATE ME BECAUSE YOU ARE UNEDUCATED AND THIRTEEN YEARS OLD!
EVERYONE ELSE: Or have degrees in English comp, whatever.
ILLOGICAL GERMAN FAN (SOCKPUPPET?): YOU DO NOT APPRECIATE HIM BECAUSE YOU ARE UNEDUCATED AND THIRTEEN YEARS OLD!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ruaha56, 2006-05-31 08:20 pm UTC

(Screened Post)
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2006-05-31 08:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]m_butterfly, 2006-05-31 09:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-31 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alpheratz, 2006-05-31 10:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-05-31 10:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]m_butterfly, 2006-06-01 06:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]snacky, 2006-06-01 02:54 pm UTC

[info]dwarfjen
2006-05-31 08:21 pm UTC (link)
YOU DON'T KNOW THE HISTORY OF DRAGONS LIKE I DO. DON'T BE GLIB.

Where's that dragon otherkin guy when you need him? That would make this wank complete.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2006-05-31 09:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dwarfjen, 2006-06-01 03:27 am UTC
(no subject) - ealusaid, 2006-06-01 04:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2006-06-01 06:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dwarfjen, 2006-06-02 09:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2006-06-02 07:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-04 01:25 am UTC

[info]palabradot
2006-05-31 08:24 pm UTC (link)
*adds series to reading list*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2006-05-31 09:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]palabradot, 2006-05-31 10:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladylance, 2006-06-01 12:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]adora_spintriae, 2006-06-01 09:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladylance, 2006-06-01 05:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]exdee, 2006-06-01 03:55 am UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-04 01:26 am UTC

[info]snacky
2006-05-31 08:39 pm UTC (link)
Wow, are the other members of the sockpuppet army going to show up, or is it just going to be intheyear2004 and mdmann?

(Reply to this)


[info]brown_betty
2006-05-31 09:13 pm UTC (link)
Based on nothing in particular, I'm beginning to suspect that the OP is whatever furries call themselves when they identify with a dragon. Scalies?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cyndra_falin, 2006-05-31 09:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]threegoldfish, 2006-05-31 09:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eyesdelight, 2006-05-31 09:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2006-06-01 01:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2006-06-01 12:45 am UTC
Because <lj user="mcity"> will be on this like a hobo on a ham sandwich. - [info]feenix, 2006-06-01 10:10 am UTC
Venom cock for the win! - [info]vyazka, 2006-06-01 09:24 pm UTC

[info]afrai
2006-05-31 10:00 pm UTC (link)
I HATE THAT GUY. I HATE THAT GUY SO MUCH. I can ignore his painfully stupid posts easily enough -- it's his comments on other people's fanworks that really get my goat. "This is quite a good picture! INCIDENTALLY, have I mentioned that Naomi Novic [sic] is totally wrong about dragons? Have I also mentioned my published books, translated into four different languages and available at the British Museum? OOH, LOOK, LOOK AT MY HUGE INTERNET COCK. Allow me now to perpetrate yet another egregious misspelling."

*TEARS HAIR OUT*

... At least he's learnt to spell Temeraire, I suppose.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]eyesdelight, 2006-06-01 12:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]afrai, 2006-06-01 01:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mrbimble, 2006-06-01 03:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]adora_spintriae, 2006-06-01 01:40 pm UTC

[info]daylightsparks
2006-05-31 10:29 pm UTC (link)
*ignores wank*

I can't decide whether those books seem cool or incredibly stupid. On the one hand, I'm a sucker for anything set during the Napoleonic Wars. On the other hand, I'm completely sick of dragons (or horsies or any other sentient/telepathic "companions") with magical speshul bonds to their Mary-Sues riders. Hmm...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]eyesdelight, 2006-05-31 10:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2006-05-31 11:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2006-06-02 09:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]telophase, 2006-05-31 10:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2006-06-02 09:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cjk, 2006-05-31 10:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2006-06-01 01:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]adora_spintriae, 2006-06-01 09:02 am UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-04 01:28 am UTC

[info]darthsemicolon
2006-05-31 11:41 pm UTC (link)
:D I was JUST looking for something to read this summer!

*completely ignores wank*

(Reply to this)


[info]meril
2006-05-31 11:52 pm UTC (link)
I'm glad enough people on my flist are reading this, so I don't have to bother to join the comm.

I was wondering why the mod wasn't doing anything about it, but then I noticed who the mod was.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nestra, 2006-06-01 03:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]meril, 2006-06-01 04:21 am UTC
Spoke too soon - [info]charmian, 2006-06-01 11:21 am UTC

[info]ladysphinx
2006-05-31 11:59 pm UTC (link)
Quoted from DC: You should not be surprised by all of the attacks on my writing for reasons you have indicated that you do not agree with. This is apparently the way "teenage fangirls" retaliate because I have dared to critisize, and have attempted to rectify some of the inconsistencies and implausibilities in the world of Temeraire. They do not understand that I do this because I am probably a bigger fan than any of them . . . But in defense of the "fan girls", my publishers do have editors to "fix" my little mistakes, a luxury I do not have here.


Wow, that's interrogating text from the wrong perspective, it's not for you, my work stands without an editor, my publisher supports me in e-mail . . . Anne? Anne, is that you?


The attitude of this snippet galls me. All the nitpicking I do on my own writing, all the self-doubt, shipping my babies off to those mean-mean proofreaders who expect me to make cruel-but-oh-so-necessary based on their unbiased opinions . . . God, I wish I could afford to be that comfortable with my own literary prowess.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]bakunina, 2006-06-03 02:04 am UTC

[info]nightwalker
2006-06-01 12:04 am UTC (link)
Temeraire wank?! Wank? From my little baby fandom of happiness and joy?

(I had no idea there even was a Temeraire fandom, which is probably why it was so damned happy and joyful. *sighs* Oh well)

The important question here, obviously, is who on Earth are they slashing? And if it involves Temeraire in any way, I don't want to know.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]bonibaru, 2006-06-01 01:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nightwalker, 2006-06-01 11:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bonibaru, 2006-06-01 11:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2006-06-01 01:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]adora_spintriae, 2006-06-01 09:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nightwalker, 2006-06-01 11:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - ladygoddess, 2006-06-04 01:30 am UTC

[info]ms_hypocrite
2006-06-01 01:37 am UTC (link)
intheyear2004 just has to be kete/lonicera, annoying German troll in several fandoms. The illogical arguing style is unmistakeable. Wouldn't be surprised if dracochronicler turned out to be another sockpuppet in that particular person's stable too. LOL!

*sits back to watch the fun*

And now, I must seek out and read the Temeraire books - they sound right up my street.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-06-01 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ms_hypocrite, 2006-06-01 02:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-06-01 01:55 pm UTC

[info]onaga
2006-06-01 02:45 am UTC (link)
I was thinking this all sounded vaguely familiar - and then I realized why: I was out the other night with one of my RL friends who is deeply geeky and in a wide range of fandoms, and she was squealing about this book in a trilogy with dragons and it was like Patrick O'Brien and omg the slashy! and yeah. I was trying to find shampoo, so I was only half listening. XD

[/only vaguely related]

Dear DC: It's called Valium. Please take some, preferably with a good slug of vodka, and stop typing for five minutes.

(Reply to this)


[info]m_butterfly
2006-06-01 05:53 am UTC (link)
*makes popcorn* Anybody else find themselves enjoying the wank subtext on some of these more than the main wank? It's like people get with TV viewing, in a way. "dracochronicler is a loony" is so blatant it's kind of boring. But "omg how dare you even think to criticize the glorious author!"? Well, it wouldn't actually be interesting if it was the main wank. As subtext, however....

(Reply to this)


[info]adora_spintriae
2006-06-01 08:57 am UTC (link)
I was waiting for this to show up here.

(Reply to this)


[info]belafarinrod
2006-06-01 12:03 pm UTC (link)
Ok, I read that preview chapter of the book and it seemed pretty neat. Yay, potential new fandom! But when I look at my bookstore, I find a book called Temeraire, so could you please help me - is it some kind of omnibus edition or the latest book just not up on her homepage yet?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]adora_spintriae, 2006-06-01 01:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]belafarinrod, 2006-06-01 01:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep_n_wolf, 2006-06-02 08:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]belafarinrod, 2006-06-02 01:18 pm UTC
You're kidding me.
[info]amyheartssiroc
2006-06-01 03:15 pm UTC (link)
My friend mentioned in passing that he was reading this book, and I was highly amused because I had just mentioned to my brother, who is a fanboy of Star Wars, Tolkien, and the Napoleonic Wars, that he should write a historical fiction with either magic or aliens. Then I added it to my reading list, because ooo, sounds interesting. Then I went on Fandom Wank, and was like, "Aw, crap, another fandom to stay out of."

(Reply to this)


[info]narcissam
2006-06-01 08:07 pm UTC (link)
Aha! It's Aja's secret fandom! She's deserting you, PoT! Get her and drag her back, the traitor!

Also, I think I must read this book. It looks splendiferous.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nightwalker, 2006-06-01 11:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2006-06-02 09:00 pm UTC



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