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Beyoncé Fans MAY Have Too Much Time On Their Hands
A disgruntled fan of Beyoncé has started a petition to get her to reshoot the video for her new song "Deja Vu" that has managed to get mainstream news coverage.

To: Columbia Records, A Division of Sony BMG

This petition is for the advocacy of having Ms. Beyoncé Knowles, Columbia Records, Music World Entertainment, and all other entities associated with the creative process of creating the long-form music video known as “Deja Vu” reshoot aforementioned video immediately.

This video is an underwhelming representation of the talent and quality of previous music video projects of Ms. Knowles. The following problems have been pointed out by numerous fans on and offline:

A) There is no clear story or theme to the video
B) The dancing is erratic, confusing and alarming at times
C) The sexual themes and shots between Ms. Knowles and Mr. Sean Carter PKA Jay-Z, are alarming and show unacceptable interactions between the two
D) The fashion in this video, while haute-couture, is unbelievable and ridiculous
E) The editing, while professionally done, causes one to get dizzy and disoriented
F) The overall feel of the video leaves a sense of much to be desired
G) The video is very disappointing and is not a clear representation of any of the songs themes

We, the fans of one Beyonce’ Knowles, ask that an alternative video be shot featuring; more choreographed & less spontaneous dancing, clearer visual themes that relate to the lyrics of the song, less gyrating, less scenes of non-existant sexual chemistry between Mr. Carter and Ms. Knowles, less zooming and quick cut edits and a more stylized and clear direction for all other aspects of the video production.

Suggested in this re-shoot would be the hire of another producer besides Ms. Sophie Mueller — one more acclimated to urban themes and imagery in music videos, other than Hype “Letterbox” Williams.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

The comments of the petition are a bit less eloquent, but quite a bit more brimming with the righteous indignation. I've cut and paste some of the more fun exerpts below.

People start out with concerns over Beyonce's mental health: "I thought I was the only one, who thought B had fell and bumped her head. "

Others find Jay-Z's inclusion in the video extraneous: "This video is the worst one yet! Who in the HE!! do JayZ thinks he is, standing there like it's his video...!!!"

Some fans express feelings of deep ambivalence: "The video wasn't THAT bad. I just got a little dizzy from everything that was going on, and I don't really appreciate that Jay-Z was just standing there rapping while she was dancing up on him like he was a stripping pole..."

Others engage in comparative analysis: "I think that if a video is done, you should be able to mute it and still know what is going on. Like when eminem does a video, it's like they play out each line, and it's fun to watch. They should play out each line..and show jay some dance moves or SOMETHING b/c it's not amusing for him to just stad there. Also, Bey is a baby, and I don't really want to look up to someone who's dancing up on a man who is this side of forty."

Won't someone think of the children? "J we know you and B are getting your swerve on and don't need to advertise to the younguns."

Some fans wonder if the video is some kind of terrible mistake: "Dear 'B'... are you sure this is the right edit of Deja Vu?"

There are conspiracy theorists: "HOW IS THIS VIDEO #1 ON TRL? I SMELL PAYOLA."

The Caps Lock of Displaced Rage also make an appearance: "JAY-Z HOW DID YOU OKAY THIS HOT MESS???"

And then there's my favorite: "I wish the sista would take a break, that's all I ask . run away, disapear, and let us wonder where the hell you are, and then come back. "

The petition, which has well over a thousand furious signatures at this point, can be found here, should you, too, feel the need to sign it.