X-Files, how I love thy wank...
First wank I post, and only because kristenk2 asked me nicely ;)

Remember the Haven board? It was recently fandom_wanked because of a thread about a certain rape-fics.

But there's much more wank on it. Here is one of them. Thread in question: Question about slash. Some poster asks whether people read it. And the wank begins...

First step: Quotes like:

"No I dont read anything like that. M&S is the only pairing for me"

"Me niether. I suppose it's niave of me, but sex is always about more than just sex and since I will always see what M&S have as being perfect with each other, they're the only ones I could ever imagine together, fantasy or no."

and

"Since you ask, I don't read slash fic under any circumstances."

Second step: Quotes like:

"I'm astounded that such issues about mischaracterization even arise in slash, given that the genre requires (at least in XF's case) a massive mischaracterization even to exist. We have zero, zip, zilch proof that *any* character on TXF is gay. We have ample evidence, on the other hand, that Mulder, Skinner and Krycek are straight, given what we've seen on the show regarding their sexual preferences. "

"The gender of the "other" is irrelevant to me since I typically avoid stories that stray from established characterization."

But the real wank on this thread are stormlantern and Touchstone. Touchstone, being a BNF and MSR-barbieshipper, who throws around things like:

"Mulder is a written character. If he had been shown to have had or mentioned to have had male relationships, fine. Just as you know your friend had other relationships. Fine. But had she not told you, you can't just pull out of the air and devine that she would have a same sex relationship. Therefore, if you were trying to write about her in a way that was true to what you *know* of her then you couldn't just guess at something like that and put it in your story and say there's a 10% probability that it could be true and present it as fact--*if* you were trying to remain undeniably truthful in your portrayal of her based on what you do know . That is the most important thing in fic for me. Whether you agree with my analogy or not, it is valid in its context, IMO. "

and, above all this one:

"You *are* either a person inclined to do that or *not.* That's the "is or isn't" If you are, then obviously it *did* happen but it happened because that is a trait you have-- being open to men or women. ... And as far as we've seen in canon, M&S haven't been open to same sex relationships."

To quote kristenk2:

"Let me get this, um, straight....Mulder, who has been shown to be open to ANY and EVERY theory, idea, tenet, belief and/or philosophy in the entire universe, INCLUDING ALIEN ABDUCTION, yes *that* Fox Mulder, he ISN'T and he couldn't POSSIBLY be, open to same-sex relationships?!?!

Nor could I'm-a-hardcore-Catholic-except-when-I'm-lost-and-personally-unfulfilled-then-I'll-try-out-some-quasi-Buddhist-theory-and-see-how-it-goes Scully??"

MSR-barbieshippers are just too much fun to watch...