TidBITS, a site which bills itself as presenting the highlights of coverage of Apple products including their iBooks, hosts a mildly amusing and, actually, not particularly negative review of what seems to be a self-published mystery novel called Venice Under Glass, by one Stephan J Harper.

The review includes some comments on the author's use (or lack thereof) of the interactive features available to iBook authors, which become relevant very shortly later.

Now you could be forgiven for thinking that there the matter would rest, but this... is... FANDOM WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK!

*cough* Sorry, sorry, had to get that out of my system. Old meme, won't happen again.

The said Stephan J Harper shows up in the very first comment, and proceeds to go ABSOLUTELY RAVING BATSHIT.

For three-hundred and eight comments, and counting.

(He doesn't even bother to say 'First post!')

A few highlights, in no particular order:
- Possible sockpuppetry (including what I strongly suspect is the author reviewing his own work under a false name)
- Winnie the Pooh jokes
- The author comparing himself to Keats and Fitzgerald
- And accusations of plagiarism, oh my!

There's even a whole thread of haiku. This one's my favourite.

As of posting, he's still going -- oh, and did I mention?

The cast of Stephan J Harper's magnum opus, the epic masterpiece of high literature that he claims to have been working on since 1997... are cuddly teddy bears. Every single one of them.

Feel Stephan J Harper's tiny ursine fury, folks.

Feel it.




Bonus: the Wankee claims to be nearly sixty-four years old.

...Again.

Poor, misunderstood, editorless vampire author Anne Rice (yes, I am going to take this opportunity to take a stroll through the memory lane of Anne Rice's batshittery) is once again demonstrating a skin of solid tissue paper.

According to The Guardian newspaper good ol' Rice Whine has signed a Change.org petition to convince Amazon to prohibit anonymous reviews because, the petition says:

"People have found ways to exploit this flaw in the system and are using it to bully, harass, and generally make life miserable for certain authors on Amazon. These people are able to create multiple accounts and then use those accounts to viciously attack and go after any author or person that they feel doesn’t belong on Amazon or who shouldn’t have published a book, made a comment on a forum post, etc."

Well, yes. I'm quite prepared to accept that people have been using the Amazon comments to troll their authors of choice (apparently Charlaine Harris has had death threats, which I feel suggests the True Blood fandom deserves some investigation over at unfunny_fandom)... the problem is that Anne, of course, has form in the Department of Kind Of Maybe Overreacting A Tinsy-Winsy Bit.

Referring to an (I quote) "anti-author gangster bully culture" when interviewed by the Grauniad doesn't really help disprove that.

And hey, check out the links on this Time article - we got spotted!

[This report cheerfully cribbed, albeit rewritten, from aforementioned Time article. Sep made me do it.]

BONUS PROTO-WANK: She's bringing back Lestat, guys! And throwing some rather side-eye-worthy shade at Twilight while she's at it:

Rice [...] has previously spoken dismissively of the vampires dreamed up by Stephenie Meyer for Twilight, saying she "feel[s] sorry for vampires that sparkle in the sun", and that Lestat "would never hurt immortals who choose to spend eternity going to high school over and over again in a small town – any more than they would hurt the physically disabled or the mentally challenged".

Stock up on popcorn for October, folks!

Thanks to an anon for this.

Anne Rice starts an Amazon forum thread on how to write better fiction reviews:

http://www.amazon.com/forum/fiction/ref=cm_cd_tfp_ef_tft_tp?_encoding=UTF8&cdForum=Fx1X9OILUVOYVZ7&cdThread=Tx3SETGL9XAMJT5

As anyone familiar with Anne Rice would be shocked to hear, it goes downhill rapidly. Rice minimods the thread and scolds people for going off-topic, while straying farther and farther off-topic herself. The fun starts on page four:

The Amazon system, wonderful as it is, is ripe for abuse by the mob when they want to go after an
author. Charlane Harris comes to mind as the best recent example.
Disgruntled Sookie Stackhouse fans on the site for the last novel in the series have essentially ganged up on some positive reviewers. For a long time they "neg voted" in masse any good review.
And you're right, the focus shifts to the author, with piles of personal insults.
I infer from all this that these negative fans have found that it is just as much fun to attack an author and try to destroy a publication as it is to become a fan of a series in the first place.
Of course they cannot bring down Charlane Harris or her books, but I do think they want to ruin the experience for her and others.

Around page 59, Anne is caught trashing commenters from the review thread in another subforum:

One thing is clear to me: these Amazon careerist predatory reviewers are HIGHLY sensitive to criticism themselves. Talk about thin skin! One reason they vilify and ridicule any author who dares to respond to a review is that they simply can't take any kind of response themselves. They can't handle it. That's why they struggle for supremacy in such a situation with the endless lecturing to the author not to dare to respond. Some of them are downright scared to death of criticism.
They've picked their bully neg reviewer role because they assumed they'd be immune to criticism and they are fit to be tied when it doesn't work for them.

She explains herself:

This Forum is not about that topic.
I realize you're determined to derail this Forum.
You've been trying for days to take a positive discussion and make it negative.

Does appealing to you as a decent human being have any effect whatsoever?

Can't you understand that there are different Forums on Amazon for different purposes?
Can't you see that?
Can't you understand why some one in a "Meet the Authors" Forum might address issues
of importance to authors that can't or shouldn't be addressed here?

What is it about this that you find so difficult to understand?

Everyone understands perfectly, backs off, and has a group hug while singing a rousing round of "For She's a Jolly Good Fellow," and all is joy and sunshine in the Amazon forums forever more.

A wank that is somewhat pan-fandom - Science Fiction in general!

First piece of background: John Scalzi is an author and, at present, he was until recently (thanks, sgaana!) the president of the SFWA. In the past few months, he has been a very vocal supporter of anti-harassment policies at SFF conventions, and in general has been a supporter of having women and minorities represented in SFF. This annoys some people. (Warning: this wank, while it has not in itself veered into unfunny territory, is between two authors - and to some extent their fanbases - who stand on very different sides of the "what (if anything) should be done to ensure equality for people of different genders/sexual orientations/races/creeds." While going over facebook and twitter to research this particular kerfluffle, I encountered some of that in other posts. None of it is linked here, but it is in this general section of the blaggertubes.)

As a second piece of background, the Hugo Awards celebrate the best of Science Fiction, and are widely considered one of the most prestigious awards an SFF author can win. While highly prestigious, however, the awards are not immune from the general principle of award-giving, which is that first someone wins, and then someone else bitches about it.

All caught up? Good.

On Sunday, the winners of the 2013 Hugo Awards were announced. John Scalzi won the award for best novel with Redshirts, a comedic novel about the unusually high mortality rates of starship employees wearing crimson attire. As usual, the win touched off some debate around the quality of the various nominees. Some people enjoyed Redshirts, others did not like it so well. Fairly standard. The Guardian has covered some of the differing points of view here, most of which are centered around the merits of the books and the voting system.

John Ringo, on the other hand, posted the following:

If anyone has been wondering why Scalzi has been picking the rather stupid fights he's been picking lately:

[link to Hugo Awards announcement]

Scalzi, either directly in response to Ringo, in response to some other criticism, or just as a general response to the world in general, posts on his blog about the award, and includes the following:

* Likewise, as is also tradition whenever a new winner of a Best Novel Hugo is announced, there are people who are heralding Redshirts as evidence that the Hugo voting process is corrupt/confused/irrelevant/a sign of the impending apocalypse. I don’t take this personally because a) I am well aware that not everyone is going to like everything I write, and that this goes double for Redshirts, which seems to have the greatest range of responses to it of any book I’ve written, b) someone would complain no matter what and who won, because the Internet is vasty and noisy, and for some people, something they don’t like winning an award is clearly evidence of systematic problems and/or conspiracy, rather than simply a popular vote of a particular group of voters not reflecting their own personal preferences.

My response to this is, as always: That’s fine. And in a larger sense, a vote no one complains about correlates very highly with a vote no one cares about. I’m happy to see people care about the Hugos, even if it’s to be annoyed with my book as a winner. With that said, the fact is this year I won the award, now it’s mine, and I’m not giving it back. So they’ll just have to deal.

(Now, there are people who are angry I won because they don’t like me personally. To them I say: Ha! Ha! Ha! Sucks to be you, dude.)

This touches off a debate on twitter, including (but certainly not limited to) the following. Feel free to add to these highlights, as my twitter-fu is by no means expert. (Which is why a majority come from Scalzi himself.) Scalzi is accused of pandering, Ringo is accused of pandering, Chris Kluwe makes an appearance.

Just because John Ringo is being a total ass to me doesn't mean you might not like his books. Some to try for free: [link to free books]

@Scalzi: Reading your post that was referenced, never going to buy any of YOUR books again. You're a deluded hypocritical racist little shit.

From Scalzi: "Highlight of the day so far: Dude with Hitler Emoji Twitter icon telling me I was racist and he would never read my books. I thought: Good"

Also from Scalzi: Seriously, though. Poor spelling does not make you wrong, but consistently poor spelling does undermine rhetorical credibility. Spellcheck!

The problem is, the Internet makes it seem like you SHOULD read the comments. But then you do, and you say, "YEAH, I forgot. Dammit."

HTML has totally failed me, so here are a few good links for twitter: Scalzi, Chris Kluwe and, courtesy of </b></a>duraniedrama, John Ringo's page. (There's some potential for unfunny there.) You can find more tweets under the hashtag #womendestroySF. (Lightspeed has announced a "Women Destroying SF" special edition.)

The wank builds up, with Ringo declaring that his wife is hotter and his hair is better than Scalzi's, until at some point in this mess, Ringo posts to his facebook page again.

Scalzi was pissing me off even before getting a Hugo for a novel so remarkably unremarkable it would barely have made it to paperback in the 1970s. Nothing against it, it's a fun, simple, mindless, read from all I've gathered. But it's not exactly Stranger in a Strange Land or Nightfall.

[....]

Which is where we start to see the issues with Scalzi suddenly not so much 'coming out of the closet' but making a splash on a variety of hot-button issues that really don't sit well with his RETAIL market. The people who actually BUY the books over the counter as opposed to market, sell and even buy them for distribution. The more books you can get a bookstore to buy, the more likely you are to sell them. So being the poster child for your commercial people is a good thing.

Orson Scott Card is brought up in the comments, but less than you might suspect.

John Ringo's politics get further attention when Scalzi links us to a review of one of Ringo's books. The review can simply be referred to as OH JOHN RINGO NO, which proceeds to become a catchphrase in the ensuing twitter comments.

This wank, it must be said, is far from over, as no one has yet flounced. Twitter continues to explode, and Scalzi continues to post to twitter, and all in all, the wank has continued merrily on for the span of a few days. Enjoy!

EDIT THE FIRST: Courtesy of tunxeh (thanks!), we have Scalzi's latest blog post. It is, as noted, worth it even if all you look at is his U MAD BRO? macro. Since I can't seem to embed, here: http://whatever.scalzi.com/2013/09/06/some-final-hugo-related-thoughts/

Taken from a kind anon, with some small changes made.

Ice, an author of some regard in the Avengers fandom, is no stranger to wank. A few months ago, she attached a long author's note to one of her fics that, simplified, requested readers not leave kudos (still needs caps):

"You know what? I am currently in too much fucking pain and under too much fucking stress to give a flying fuck about social conduct.

I had one simple wish — no kudos.

I keep on asking that on every fic and every fucking time on every fucking one of them, there's a person who just... what? Can’t help themselves? Well done. Thanks for reminding me, over and over again, that I must, indeed, not post my stuff and hope for a simple fucking courtesy to respect my fucking wishes."

Fail_Fandomanon and Tumblr got ahold of the story and promptly spammed it with kudos.
Since then, her fics have continued to be subject of kudosing and - in her mind- low comment counts when compared to the rest of the fandom. Thus, she decides to leave the ficdoms in a blaze of glory.

By writing a longform analogy comparing writing fanfic to running a restaurant. (Original link BALEETED, caps HERE.)

This immediately lands on Avengersanon, Fail_Fandomanon and Tumblr, and subsequently her comment pages fill up with snark. (All deleted: page 1, page 2, page 3, and page 4, with bonus fic.). There's even podfic! After trying to orphan the piece (since deleted), Ice deleted all of her Avengers fanfic, leaving her table AO3 account empty of Avengers content.

For a bonus treat, be sure to read this gem from the wank report, in which a disgruntled ex-ficwriting mousie pops up to sympathize with Ice and humblebrag about her important profic writing career, eventually declaiming all feedback-denying fanfic readers and non-pro fanfic authors as a "whiny ass bunch of freeloaders" and "doormats," respectively, who may or may not be in an abusive relationship.

The first volume of William H. Patterson's biography of Robert Heinlein is released today, but the scuffle over it is already a week old.

This is approximately the millionth Heinlein biography to hit the shelves, so perhaps it is a bit difficult to see why it matters, but this underestimates the devotion of Heinlein nerds. Jo Walton, (papersky) published a review on Tor.com, in which although she says some nice things, she concludes:

Patterson’s biography is also riddled with tiny insignificant errors of the kind that make me lose trust. [...] If I can’t trust Patterson on details that I know backwards and forwards and inside out, how can I trust him on matters that are new to me?

A reasonable doubt!

( OR IS IT? )

Katherine Kerr, editor of Weird Tales of Shakespeare and author of Celtic myth and Dungeons and Dragons 'inspired' novels decides to create another derivative work: her thoughts on yaoi.

A number of people on LJ have been expressing their views on fanfic, so I thought I'd add mine. I despise it.

http://aberwyn.livejournal.com/181755.html Deleted!

Caps of first post:
via alchemynerd on LJ: http://www.sendspace.com/file/7ovake
via alchemynerd on LJ: http://www.sendspace.com/file/nsjfzd
Perhaps you'd prefer PDF: http://knitmeapony.com/fw/kerr_kerfuffle_page1.pdf
Or HTML, via maneman on LJ: knitmeapony.com/fw/katherine_kerr_career_suicide.html


And this includes the professional transformative works:

If someone can think of no better idea than to take a classic kid's book series and try to wring a few more bucks out of it, like the whole 'Wicked' series, then they should get a real job.

Comment #2 is fellow author Jim Hines getting a bit snarky with the idea. She backpedals mightily in the face of a professional author.

There are disappointed fans! She replies to her own post rather than editing it!

Not to mention mocking, accusations of trolling, and weird discussions of how fanfic is like embroidery or other crafting.

First post deleted, with explanation: Because people got "offensive": http://aberwyn.livejournal.com/182244.html Also deleted, cap of this, courtesy of zulu http://tinypic.com/r/akzz1d/5

Then there was a third post, which I missed entirely, dubiously titled "what's wrong with talking about quality?" Cap, courtesy of woodenleg http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/5620/swrongwithtalkingaboutq.png


And when the second and third posts were deleted, a martyrish post went up here: http://aberwyn.livejournal.com/182619.html

Lordy, yet another post, preserved below. Edit: Post deleted, but thankfully preserved.

And one (final?) post, this time with comments turned off:

Summing up
1. 3 or 4 of the posts in the mobbing stage were interesting and intelligent; they made a nicely reasoned defence of fanfic. Good for you! You might have changed my mind if it weren't for the others.

2. The rest of the 200 or so posts actually proved my points about poor writing skills, lack of cultural knowledge, and lack of imagination, since they repeated each other's thoughts in varying degrees of inarticulate language. One person, in a post I screened by disallowed, even used a toilet reference that was supposed to embarrass me. He also seemed to think I'm man, oddly enough.

3. A sloppy syllogism for those who didn't get the B'rer Rabbit point:
A. I dislike fanfic and don't want anyone writing it about my work.
B. If you don't read my work, you can't write about it.
C. Therefore threatening to ignore my work does not injure me in any way. Rather, I'm relieved that you won't.

4. The mobbing was not merely rude to me. We can agree on the point that the flip tone of my original post deserved the response it got. However, the mobbing was rude to all the regular readers of this space. It bored them, it cut off their right of discussion, and I suspect it convinced some of them that my original post's opinion of fanfic writers was in the main correct.

Personally, I think this fanfic of the Diana Gabaldon kerfuffle has a paucity of imagination. And relatively dull.

Diana Gabaldon, author of the wildly popular Outlander series, has an opinion on fan fiction: I think it’s immoral, I _know_ it’s illegal, and it makes me want to barf whenever I’ve inadvertently encountered some of it involving my characters.

Highlights include:

• Writing fanfic is just like breaking into someone's house.
  
• Fanfic is WAY WAY WAY TOO PORNY omg ick people have sexual fantasies!*
  
• What to do about an auction offering fanfic to raise money for a cancer patient? She doesn't want to "seem heartless"! So she seeks advice in the comments. Which are mostly full of "Fanfic? I have never heard of such a despicable load of garbage! Also, CRUSH THAT CANCER PATIENT!"
  

ETA: Unpublished author Eddie Louise (who cannot write the word "shit" and seems to fail spectacularly at reading comprehension) offers fanfic writers A CHALLENGE! Accept it if you dare, sniveling pedo thieves!

ETA 2: Previously, Ms Gabaldon has said fanfic is like selling your children into white slavery. Well. Now. I don't even know what to do with that.

ETA 3: Smart Bitches, Trashy Books has some discussion on the topic.

ETA 4: And bookshop on LJ/DW has a rebuttal.

ETA 5: See what happens when I leave the sweet embrace of the internet for a few hours? Ms. Gabaldon updates her blog!

ETA 6: Evidently Ms. Gabaldon deleted all evidence of her hissyfit, but some wankas have screencaps in this thread.

ETA 7: kate_nepevu has screencaps and the text of Gabaldon's posts here. And via alchemynerd, more screencaps available here:

http://www.sendspace.com/file/tiz4vp
http://www.sendspace.com/file/ibidpj
http://www.sendspace.com/file/r6zik6
http://www.sendspace.com/file/hlknqo
http://www.sendspace.com/file/d9alsh

Thanks for all the links! :)




MOD REMINDER: Remember, my little wankas, we DO NOT troll the wank. Nor do we write fanfic after the author has specifically requested people not and post it in the comments here, no matter how tempting it may be. Carry on. oh god my inbox ow ow



*Just as a point of interest, I was a bookseller for 12 years, and had several customers tell me about the sex scenes in her books. Some were pro ("My friend told me to read these books for the sex scenes, and she was totally right, they are so hot, this is best thing to happen to my sex life in years!") and some were con ("What is up with all the sex all the time? Where's the story?"), but one thing you can't say about her books is that they're sexual-fantasy free. :D

Rob Thurman is an urban fantasy author who desperately wants to get the 6th book in her series on the NY Times bestseller list. According to a wee mousie, the way bestsellers are calculated is by applying a complex and seekrit algorithm to the first week's sales, from Tuesday (when new books, like albums and babies, "drop") to Saturday. So it's very important to rack up sales during that time period if you want to list.

Also according to the mousie, Thurman's been going nuts for the past month, posting in all caps, and topping things off with this post. Thurman berates a reader for buying the book on Monday because said reader is having surgery on Tuesday. The reader apologizes, Thurman says she'll need pictures of the surgery.

Thurman's specialness doesn't end there. Non-USA readers have to buy two copies of the book to get their reward (sneak peek at the 7th books), people who buy online are Ebil! and more CAPSlock.

Her tweets are also... yeah.

Hat tip to the mouse, for stealing borrowing chunks of her post.

Pop Quiz:

You are R. Malone, a new author who has a book out that is predominately getting reviews in the four to five star range when someone gives your book a review a one or two star. Do you. . .

A) Post an attack on the review (NEW WITH SCREEN CAPS!)
B) Post an article attacking the reviewer on authorsden.com ETA: DELETED NOW WITH SCREENCAP!
C) Send nasty comments and later delete them off of Goodreads (see second edit at the end of this post)
D) Openly declare war on anyone who rates your book poorly
E) Do all of the above until readers are afraid to post reviews DELORTED TOO! ALAS, SCREENCAPS: REBECCA, WE WEILL PROTECT YOU!!

BONUS WANKERY IN SCREENCAP FORM!!!


Credit given when credit is due: Copypasta directly from sf_drama

( THE OTHER 7,256/SCREENCAPS/NAME-CALLING/ACCUSATIONS EDITS BEHIND THE CUT NOW )


EDIT, YET AGAIN:
And what's a wank without sock-puppetry? God I love this woman. Keep up the crazy, please. The lols are great. Where we're been mentioned.

The swan song of one thanfiction aka Andy Blake/VB, etc. He is leaving the internets forver. Maybe. If he doesn't die from his mysterious heart condition--he's going to college. Yes, sir. But he is unlikely to ever give up the cancer sticks.

n.b.: Please use the pronoun he when refering to Andy or face the wrath of pretty much everyone, but especially those who can ban your ass along with the rest of you.

eta: I didn't bother posting a link to Turi's reaction post because it was even more boring than Andy's brave farewell. But some sockpuppet comments to defend Andy.

"These do not exist other than the usual complaints about a failed romance (between he and luvscharlie)."

WAIT WOT? All that frothing from luvscharlie was heart break? D:

There once was an archive for Yuletide
and when it died every other fool cried
stop thief
in erroneous belief
that their fics were about to go worldwide

( background )

( the set up )

( coda )

OH ETA: melodyclark is here to show us all that even older women like to wank like horny thirteen year olds, but if she doesn't give it a rest I'm worried she's going to go blind, develop hairy palms, AND come down with a raging case of carpal tunnel syndrome.

thanks to inquisition for the heads up.

eta 3.1415 The abyss is looking into us... and it's fucking stupid. :D

bonus lulz: tzikeh point out to me that melodyclark tried to edit her fanlore page.

( text for anyone who can't or doesn't want to load fanlore )

So who's been wondering what's been going on with Lady Sybilla and the Russet Doom Saga? I know I haven't! But here we are regardless.

First there was this May 5 message to FanHistory editor Tikatu on her talk page:

Hi, Tikatu. I noticed you've been the most frequent editor of the Russet Noon article, so I'm sending you an update on the "Blood Roses" image by Charli Siebert. I just received an email from her, informing me that she does not want me to use her image for the cover of the book.

Charli wrote to Sybilla: "Unfortunately, I do not give out permission for use of my work in any way, so you'll have to find another cover for your book."

Charli also added, "All of your advertising and marketing of the book containing the image will need to be removed from any and all publications. This includes all print advertising and websites that display the image. If there are websites that you are aware of that are displaying the book cover in question, it is your responsibility to contact them and inform them that they need to remove the image from their site."

Based on Charli's specific request, I am asking that you please remove the old Russet Noon cover currently on display in the article. And, if it's not too much to ask, please add a note to the article to confirm that Russet Noon will have a new cover image before it gets published. Please let me know if you need me to upload a screencap of Charli's email as proof.

Last part of the update is that Charli and I are in negotiations to have her create a new image exclusively for the new Russet Noon cover.

Thanks very much.

Artistic revolution 07:45, 5 May 2009 (UTC)

Consider also this newly-added apology on the Russet Noon website:

On behalf of AV Paranormal and Russet Noon, we'd like to offer our sincerest apologies to Charli Siebert, the creator of "Blood Roses," the above image. We had used this image for the cover of Russet Noon under the mistaken assumption that it was a royalty-free image. Even though this image will no longer be on the cover of Russet Noon, we are extremely proud to announce that Charli Siebert is in negotiations with Lady Sybilla to design an image exclusively for the cover of Russet Noon. We look forward to revealing the new cover of the novel. Please click on "Blood Roses" to visit Charli Siebert's official site, Unimaginative.org.

As for Wikipedia, it looks like Potato Moon's page is pretty safe from deletion for the moment. The article currently identifies Russet Noon by name, with the explanation, "Stephenie Meyer uses the word "russet" numerous times throughout the Twilight Saga to describe the color of Jacob Black's skin." You will never guess who edited the article to include that superfluous information. The change occurred after this conversational exchange:


Oh, and how is old PAD's circle jerk parody novel coming er, going? Well, it's up to, like, Part 20, but I haven't read it past the first chapter so I can't tell you whether it's any good.

And now, for funsies! Sybsy's now been namedropped in the Small Name Big Ego article on TVTropes.

Aaaaaand we now have the QUEEN of this trope for Twilight fandom: Lady Sybilla, whom no one had apparently ever even heard of before in the fandom before she became the writer (and attempted publisher) of "tribute sequel" Russet Noon, and convinced the entire internet is made up of one person with a grudge against her after the fandom at large and fandom_wank told her that her understanding of copyright was... flawed at best. She was banned from The Other Wiki after refusing to believe that her "highly controversial" unreleased fanfic wasn't notable enough and continually reinstated its article. Try to read the Russet Doom Saga in all its glory and not boggle.

And for a little added lubrication? Lady Sybilla Apologizes to Stephenie Meyer for Writing Russet Noon. Why yes, that IS another press release, fresh just today! I c&ped it here in case you don't want to contribute to her page views (and she'll probably take it down again as soon as she has another change of universal mind anyway). She's also updated her Twitter for the first time since April as well.

I just returned from a nine-day trip, so I'm playing a bit of catch-up with my supplementary links list and link hub/screencap guide; I appreciate your patience. And you know what else I appreciate? When I got home this morning, you will never guess what I found waiting for me in my mail box. Except that you totally will.

It was lip gloss.

ETA: So I clicked a link back to the Russet Noon site, and found myself in a time warp. It seems Sybilla's reverted to her original format after so long. But before you start thinking she just fuxxored the files, check out the links at the top. She links to: her own Twitter, Comic Mix, Google News, Foforks, Wordpress, her own Myspace, IMDB, Wikipedia, the Wall Street Journal, Twilight Blips, FanHistory, Fanpop, the Small Name Big Ego TvTropes article, Amazon forums, the reupload of her reading the preface on tinypic, Buzznet, ONTD, Fandom Wank, the Twilight Lexicon, and Edward Heart Bella.

Screencaps forthcoming here (thanks ari_o).

Also we may have missed another in-between site version. Did anyone catch a screencap?) You can view the last edit to the Russet Noon site before this latest revamp here, where she had added the "temporary model" for Russet Noon's new cover art.

Below is a temporary model of the new Russet Noon cover image that Charli will be recreating. The copyright information for the artist of this talisman is currently unknown. Hopefully the efficient fandomwankers will help us track down the artist who originally created this talisman so we can give them credit. This is just a sample image of what the final design will look like.

She wants us to do her homework for her. Great.

ETA 2: I'm reasonably certain the Russet_noon twitterer is taking the piss. I quite like the blend of Snacky's and Godwin's Law lobbed our way.

ETA 3: FanHistory has given Lady Sybilla a space to speak her point of view. It's... uhmazing.

ETA 4: She took out her link to the Twilight Lexicon and added a new one to this article from RelateMag.com, which spells the title of the book Russet Moon. Still, I prefer this version of the RelateMag article:

There’s a ‘new’ Twilight words that is dated people to charge alarming waves across the the public. Sure you’ve irrefutably impute to a fraction of fanfiction stories that takes the Twilight psycho we fondness and puts them in bizarre scenes, rewrites parts of the books, adds scenes prospect to be missing. The words is all fustian up to Jacob and what happens after Breaking Dawn. But Lady Sybilla has written an uninjured words entitled Russet Moon and she’s flourishing to advertise it. Some people improvise it is flourishing to be smashing addict fiction. Others imagine it is unconditionally miscarry. To affect the dip on the words button the website.

It's like it went through Babel Fish and crawled back out again, weeping bitterly about its lost messages and implications.

In Part III, we saw what happened when Lady Sybilla tried to tangle with the Twilight Lexicon mods for the last time (they banned her), and watched in awe as Wikipedia users worked "around the clock" to get her Russet Noon article deleted. You can still find "The Wikipedia Wars" linked on the Russet Noon website, but you'll have to scroll down past...

The FanHistory Wars.A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away....

Artistic revolution (who, for reasons which will become blatantly obvious, is a suspected sockpuppet of Lady Sybilla) edited the shit out of the Russet Noon fanhistory page. Artistic revolution has a pretty one-track mind, it would appear. Or two-track, if you count Lady Sybilla as a separate topic.

In the midst of all those edits, there was no shortage of information about me, Sybilla's own favorite "stalkarazzo." (I know I'm her favorite, she says so herself on the Russet Noon website.) The following information is culled from the Revision as of 00:27, 21 April 2009 version of the page.

Although Caito posted the email text on one of her many Journalfen pages, her only acknowledgment of Sybilla's concerns was: "I'm totally over this email business. I have a spam filter and I intend to use it. If someone wants to continue discussing this shiz, she can do so in the comments like everybody else." Strange reaction given that Caito's Whois record for her site openly discloses her gmail address:

At this point, Artistic revolution somehow thought it was appropriate to include my mailing address and contact information. Yes, in the middle of the article for Russet Noon. But that's not all! She did go on. I bolded my favorite parts!

More recently, Caito provided us with a video example of how the attention-whoring for which she mocks Sybilla is more contagious than a disease. Ironically, while she spends her valuable time making fun of the ''Russet Noon'' author for trying to exploit Stephenie Meyer's popularity, Caito, too, seems to be riding the wave of the ''Russet Noon'' obsession. And she does so quite gracefully. If it weren't for Caito, ''Russet Noon'' would have never achieved taboo status.

... On April 3, 2009, LadySybilla emailed Caito and asked her to stop her "online stalking activities." On this email, Sybilla warned, "If you don't, I will notify as many administrators as I have to until they take action." Sybilla then contacted the Journalfen technical support team to ask how she could contact an administrator in order to report libelous accusations posted by some of their users. But, instead of responding to Sybilla's concerns, the JournalFen support team (if, in fact, there is one) forwarded a copy of the email to Caito. This incident may or may not prompt internet users to wonder about the legitimacy of Journalfen. Is Journalfen an actual company? If it is, who are the tech support staff and/or administrators behind it?

... Judging by the look of things, it won't be Sybilla who will be profiting off of ''Russet Noon'' sales after all. Let's see what happens when Caito and her BFFs at Twilight Lexicon get their hands on a copy of the novel in September.

All that has since been nuked from the actual FanHistory page, and replaced with more evenhanded material. People here at FW went a little flaily for a bit, as a software snafu made it appear as though FH mod Sidewinder had been the one to add my personal info when she'd really just meant to take it down.*

Then the mods brought the hurt down on Artistic revolution, who has been banned from editing the wiki for two whole weeks! She's really sorry, though, guys. Please stop throwing stones at her, and let her catapult boulders at others in peace.

But it's not like Artistic revolution has been the only one tooling with it, either. Some anons got in and tweaked it ever so slightly, like changing the story summary simply to "OH JOHN RINGO NO!" Editing the Russet Noon article is temporarily locked to admins, due to anon vandalizing and a neutrality dispute.

Personal notes:

1. I do not know what end anyone would hope to achieve by posting my address.
2. I'm not BFFs or even BFs or even just Fs with the TwiLex mods, but I sure do like them more than I like Lady Sybilla.
3. I have no clue how I would stand to profit from anything having to do with Russet Noon.
4. I have no idea who Lee Thomas even is.

*Aside to FanHistory folks: Thanks. I really appreciate what you did. Do me one more solid? I did respond to Lady Sybilla's concerns about my "accusations", but I guess it got lost in the epic wave of comments. Like I said before, Lady Sybilla is welcome to come engage me in comments, but as far as I know she has yet to do so. Muchos gracias.

ETA: Artistic revolution rides forth on teal deer to appeal to Laura's professionalism.

ETA 2: Laura responds!

ETA 3: The Russet Noon website is now basically a hate shrine dedicated to me and FH mod Sidewinder, complete with Photoshopped screencaps of me interacting with people I've never actually interacted with. Oh, and also my contact information.

You know, I'm starting to get the feeling that she doesn't take criticism very well.

ETA 4: From Artistic revolution's usertalk page:

I'm not interested in antagonizing you. You have been objective, but I still have to insist that Sidewinder, whoever she is, hasn't been. She might not have the same IP address as Caito, but her editing patterns are dubious. I have listed the evidence on my website because I'm blocked from doing so here. If I'm not allowed to edit the article, then at least Sidewinder should also be prevented from tampering with it any further.

All in all, as I said before, I'm not interested in antagonizing you. Based on your reasons for why Wikipedia blacklisted FH, I know you can understand how I feel in regards to Russet Noon. I have seen that your procedures reflect professionalism. This is why I appealed to that.

I sincerely apologized to both you and Tikatu, but never received a reply. At least at Wikipedia they lifted the ban. Sure, they deleted the article, but they were reasonable enough to lift the ban. I'm sorry if the procedure I followed to try to negotiate with you guys was not what you expected.

I would much rather have you delete the Russet Noon article altogether than to continue with this conflict. Once again, it is not my intention to antagonize you.

So, yeah, Artistic revolution is almost certainly Lady Sybilla.

ETA 5: The hate shrine is now down from the Russet Noon site. It's been replaced with a paragraph about how "the wars have ceased" and the rest is now ostensibly about the fanfic again.

ETA 4-24 7:22am Tokyo time: In case anyone was wondering how Lady Sybilla was taking the news about Peter David's community parody-in-progress, here's the reaction from her twitter:

# it's an honor even though it's a satire, because Peter David is a very seasoned writer
4 minutes ago from web

# many fanfic writers of the net will be uniting to write Potato Moon. The creator is comic book author Peter David
4 minutes ago from web

# let's hope this communal novel will inspire many more to come. I'd love to see a serious thriller or drama like this
7 minutes ago from web

# communal novels are a new genre, there are not many of them that I know of. I'm very curious to read Potato Moon.
8 minutes ago from web

# I'm very proud to announce that Russet Noon has inspired a very unique parody, Potato Moon. It's a communal novel
8 minutes ago from web

The Russet Noon website has also changed. It no longer makes mention of any "wars" whatsoever.

ETA 7: "You are invited to read our latest press release, "Lady Sybilla: The Darth Vader of Fandom."* It appears that Russet Noon has already achieved taboo status without having even been released yet. That's what happens when a Darth Vader figure like Lady Sybilla is created. And now she's found a worthy opponent: Peter David."

*That link goes to a c&p in my journal. To view the original (and give LS more hits) click here.

ETA 8: Her tweeting continues, c&ped here.

ETA 9: The first part of Potato Moon is up... I have a FanHistory page now, and actually I kind of like it, especially the graphic and its caption... and yes, my little lolcats, you can has more ONTD.

ETA 10: She just updated the Russet Noon site again (screencapped here), linking to the articles that appeared on Comicmix and IMDB. (Except her IMDB link actually goes here, where you have to scroll down halfway down the page the relevant blurb.)

ETA 11: Peter David's Potato Moon has its own Wikipedia page! It is a thing of true beauty and you will never, ever guess who started it. But to avoid the situation that occurred the last time she wrote articles on Wikipedia, she's asked another user to edit the Potato Moon article for her. And he is (adding links to the Potato Moon blog entries, at least)! He just wants to know more about who AV Paranormal is. This should go well, I think.

ETA 12: She's linked to something on the Wall Street Journal site now. What the lemonfresh hell?

SGA ficcer is not getting the acclaim she says she deserves. So she is going to delete her LJ. Her 560 "friends" are not fawning enough so what's the point?!

There are at least 60 comments on her epic fic's last two chapters now. I'm too lazy to figure out how many there were before she flipped out. Also she posted the last chapter only yesterday.

And the mea culpas pour in--three pages of "I'm sorry/I suck/Plz don't go."

( cut for dead links )
ETA3: BAHLEETION!! (saved pages below)

page 1, page 2, page 3, and expanded smackdown. And page 4 thanks to longtimegone! :D

Lady Sybilla put out another press release. She also showed up at the Twilight Lexicon again, since that went so well the last time. (When the formatting gets hard to read, check it here.)

(Fanhistory links are all nofollow.)

After her Wikipedia article was deleted (you can go to the Russet-Noon webpage for more information), Lady Sybilla edited the shit out of the Russet Noon Fanhistory page all by her lonesome (despire Laura Hale asking around on Bebo whether anyone else had anything to contribute).

And in case your blog entry about the whole affair shows up there, I'm sorry. Lady Sybilla farmed the Russet Doom Supplementary Links Collection and changed my format a little to make the attention seem less wholly negative.

Oh also I put together an entry in my journal with links to screencaps and transcriptions and things, for quick and easy reference. 

For those just tuning in:

Lady Sybilla wanted to put out Russet Noon, her tribute sequel to the Twilight Saga via sockpuppet publisher. Smeyer never drew her characters, so this totally wasn't copyright infringement. She put out press releases, a Youtube reading, and listed her book on eBay months and months before she intended to make it available.

Then, of course, the "massive hate campaign" began. Darn Earth logic!

I myself wrote no less than four separate versions of a wank report, as I tried to keep on top of everything (and eventually lost my grip on sanity).

Lady Sybilla did not take this well. She pretend-banned the russet-noon site, taking down its former glory, then changed it to goad voyeurs.

And what did I get for my efforts? Emails from Lady Sybs herself.

Now she's put up a message directing us to the interview she did at a Brazilian fan site.

In the words of Stephenie Meyer, "When a story demands to be written, there's no way to resist."

Yes, Sybsy baby, and your story demands to be put down. Um, I mean the reports on you, not Russet Noon. Your tomfoolery must be chronicled for posterity the lulz.

But wait, there's more! Aaaaaaand she's back to writing press releases. It's the Foforks interview with this blurb at the end:

AV Paranormal Publishing is an independent publisher in the Los Angeles area. We publish online books, digital art and paperback novels. No unsolicited manuscript submissions are considered. We accept query emails with a short synopsis. Email your queries to submissions@avparanormal.com

O rly? Also the Twilight Lexicon is back to smacking her down. Kisses, kids!

And guess what just came up in my Google reader? This post by Karen Knows Best! Which led me to go and check...yes! Lee Goldberg is back on the case!

( Now for the tl;dr... )

In other news, I'm totally over this email business. I have a spam filter and I intend to use it. If someone wants to continue discussing this shiz, she can do so in the comments like everybody else.
ETA: Yes, we can haz more press release.

Watchmen screenwriter David Hayter writes a sincere but slightly tongue-in-cheek open letter on Hardcore Nerdity to Watchmen fans and non-fans, to urge them to see the movie more than once in order to understand it.

One of his other points is that he thinks those who hate the movie on principle without having seen it should let it marinate in their minds and give it a chance:

It may upset you. And it probably will upset you.

And all along, we really meant it to. ...All this time, you’ve been waiting for a director who was going to hit you in the face with this story. To just crack you in the jaw, and then bend you over the pool table with this story. With its utterly raw view of the darkest sides of human nature, expressed through its masks of action and beauty and twisted good intentions... Like the Comedian on the Grassy Knoll. ...You'll be thinking about this film, down the road. It'll nag at you. How it was rough and beautiful. How it went where it wanted to go, and you just hung on. How it was thoughtful and hateful and bleak and hilarious. And for Jackie Earle Haley.

Trust me. You'll come back, eventually. Just like Sally.

Comments begin in the 'we love Watchmen (although some of us have reservations about the swinging massive blue dong), go Dayter' mould, until people, from page three onwards, suddenly notice the metaphor he used to describe how the movie should make you feel:

DUDE. No one asks to be cracked in the jaw and bent over the goddamned pool table. Was there NO OTHER ANALOGY you could have used? Do you realize that you're comparing your movie to a rapist and the moviegoers to victims asking for it? And what is this "You'll come back. Just like Sally" crap? Do you have any f***ing idea how offensive that is? Could you not have come up with some other analogy, some other pithy tag, something that doesn't make it out like the Comedian was doing Silk Spectre a f***ing favor when he beat her bloody and tried to rape her?

Did you mean to do that?? If not, erm, consider your words more carefully next time you do the "open letter" thing, because wow, did that part get away from you.

Dayter comments on page 7 with an apology claiming he does not condone violence against women, which is edited into the original article. People briefly thank him for apologising, and then attack him again. Dayter responds graciously via huge spoonfuls of sarcasm and retracting his apology (page 8):

Clearly, you can't get less hateful or spewy than that. I humbly retract the statement.

Anyway, I'm sorry you disliked the film.

And you're right, I don't know why I ever set out to do this in the first place. It's really the world I'm hurting. Damn my family, and their almost-constant need for food!

On top of all of this there's huge amounts of movie rage, but the best thing about the whole altercation is the people at Hardcore Nerdity going so far as to make a video response urging people to LEAVE DAYTER ALONE, starring a very angry Dr. Manhattan.

Our saga begins with azewewish complaining about the warning system used by lotrips, a community that lists new stories in LotRiPs fandom. Which is fair enough as the moderators define warnings to be anything in the fic that readers should be aware of.

But then it devolves into: OMG STOP LABELLING MY FIC WITH LABELS THAT ARE NOT IN THE HEADER! and MY FIC IS NOT ANGST WHY ARE YOU LABELLING IT ANGST?! and OMG YOU ARE LINKING TO LOCKED POSTS DONT YOU KNOW THAT'S CARDINAL SIN #1 and OMG THE HORROR YOU ARE LISTING WHAT TYPE OF AU A STORY IS! and OMG YOU ARE SPOILING THE STORY

And it wouldn't be fun if there isn't a threat in the whole mess:

Knock if off or stop listing us all. WE are the authors here, NOT you. What WE want people to see about our stories is what WE post in OUR OWN HEADERS. YOUR opinion on what should or shouldn't be there DOESN'T MATTER. Such things about a story is what individual feedback is for, NOT what people should see before they read something!

And another, courtesy of Nverland

As was stated, you have the right to comment, you do not have the right to defame others work by your own opinions. And as such lotrips and msilverstar have both been banned several places already today.

The lotrips posts start here and here. azewewish has a
whatcha guys think about this?' post. LJ's metafandom has a whole slew of links about this bruising of authorial sensibilities here

Fic-labeling and warning wank: can spring and the REVIEWS ARE EBIL chorus be far behind?

(Found on a combination of wank_report and metafandom on LJ. Hat-tip to the 'mouse I'm blatantly swiping it from, and apologies to miraba. Couldn't pass the title up.)

So here's the dealio: A Teaspoon And An Open Mind (the main Doctor Who fic archive) underwent a changing of the mods and implemented some changes in policy.

About the same time, user MelindaKitty was banned for using a homophobic slur in an essay and being abusive to moderators. Also, as it turns out, misclassifying one of her essay as a story. (There are screencaps.) She was kind enough to post the essay in question so we could see how entirely not like a story it is.

She was not very happy about it. Neither were either of her spouses or her friends. But the mods and their ilk kept their own comments on the affair behind f-lock and so things quieted down for a while.

Then came the Fighting Spoon. Fighting Spoon's purpose was to provide a place for people to bitch about the recent policy changes at the Teaspoon. It also created an lj comm which claims it can "achive your fics but you should use friend only posts there - so Teaspoon Mods don't know who's with me" (which ignores the fact that anyone can see who's joined a comm.)

Meanwhile, in the journal itself, Fighting Spoon starts out by reposting an email where it complains about how it took a whole twelve to fourteen hours for their fic to get approved now that submissions are moderated. In the comments, moderation of submissions is called repressive pseudo-fascism and V for Vendetta is quoted channeled.

Wank breaks out on all sides! There is tl;dr rant about how mods should be democratically elected and that the whole thing is in violation of the First Amendment, never mind that the mod that banned her is SCOTTISH. Melindakitty's husband reposts the Godwin-invoking lyric-filled rant he'd emailed the mods with. People get confused about who swore at the mod. A debate on the nature of fascism is held. Comparisons are made to Animal Farm. The spirit of Aldous Huxley is called upon. Someone tries to play peacemaker which doesn't work.

All the while Fighting Spoon is backpedalling furiously and MelindaKitty just wants to get back to policy.

About the only thing missing from this is Rosewank, but don't worry, someone's trying to start one in the wank report!