Tuesday, August 10th, 2010

Eleanor Roosevelt says you're paid in exposure

tetradecimal
Edit: False alarm, the author of the wank is underage.

But have some cake in compensation.
(74 comments | Leave a comment)

Monday, June 7th, 2010

♫ My my my my Mitchell ♫

tetradecimal
Brought to you by wank_report!

Clan Mitchell is a Dreamwidth community revolving around the fictional Mitchell family, which appears to be a huge group of people who live in the Carolinas under the administration of a matriarch named Momma, generally serve in some branch of the U.S. military, and/or operate under a general curtain of good ol' American values, get-well-pies, and care packages.

Motto: "The Mitchells will inherit the earth: the meek don't move fast enough."

From the profile:
"So ivorygates and synecdochic made up a bunch of crazy Southern relatives, and the "Fuck Canon, Fanon Makes More Sense, Dammit" club (meetings on alternate Tuesdays, free t-shirts at the recruiting tables, bring your own beer but the cookies are free) firmly believes that "Kansas, my ass" is the best way to approach Cameron Mitchell's home life, and, well, there should be more fic about these people!

Not necessarily a shared-continuity set of stories -- use as much or as little as you'd like -- but a shared-character-list and a place for people to build a shared-world. Grab a Mitchell and start writing. Resistance is futile! You will be assimilated. And probably baked for."


It all starts with a ficprompt... )
ETA: Revenge of the Sith: cap including the offending fic.

Holy ETA, Batman: (thanks, mousie)
"When someone has put in a lot of blood, sweat, and tears to create an absolutely beautiful sandbox to play in (a sandbox that they love very very much), and then not only allows you to come in and play in their sandbox, but graciously opens the door and INVITES you in, you don't shit in the sandbox. You don't. M'kay? Good."

We can't stop here, this is ETA country: It's time for the public address roll, looks like. From [info]eilan:
* slybrarian calls for fair and balanced.
* quinfirefrorefiddle & co. are appalled at F_W's lack of journalistic integrity.
* Synecdochic's state of the union, and also ivorygates is banned. Or left. Either way, she's not a mod any more.
(2531 comments | Leave a comment)

Monday, May 3rd, 2010

[info]snacky
Diana Gabaldon, author of the wildly popular Outlander series, has an opinion on fan fiction: I think it’s immoral, I _know_ it’s illegal, and it makes me want to barf whenever I’ve inadvertently encountered some of it involving my characters.

Highlights include:

  • Writing fanfic is just like breaking into someone's house.
  • Fanfic is WAY WAY WAY TOO PORNY omg ick people have sexual fantasies!*
  • What to do about an auction offering fanfic to raise money for a cancer patient? She doesn't want to "seem heartless"! So she seeks advice in the comments. Which are mostly full of "Fanfic? I have never heard of such a despicable load of garbage! Also, CRUSH THAT CANCER PATIENT!"



ETA: Unpublished author Eddie Louise (who cannot write the word "shit" and seems to fail spectacularly at reading comprehension) offers fanfic writers A CHALLENGE! Accept it if you dare, sniveling pedo thieves!

ETA 2: Previously, Ms Gabaldon has said fanfic is like selling your children into white slavery. Well. Now. I don't even know what to do with that.

ETA 3: Smart Bitches, Trashy Books has some discussion on the topic.

ETA 4: And bookshop on LJ/DW has a rebuttal.

ETA 5: See what happens when I leave the sweet embrace of the internet for a few hours? Ms. Gabaldon updates her blog!

ETA 6: Evidently Ms. Gabaldon deleted all evidence of her hissyfit, but some wankas have screencaps in this thread.

ETA 7: [info]kate_nepevu has screencaps and the text of Gabaldon's posts here. And via [info]alchemynerd, more screencaps available here:

http://www.sendspace.com/file/tiz4vp
http://www.sendspace.com/file/ibidpj
http://www.sendspace.com/file/r6zik6
http://www.sendspace.com/file/hlknqo
http://www.sendspace.com/file/d9alsh

Thanks for all the links! :)




MOD REMINDER: Remember, my little wankas, we DO NOT troll the wank. Nor do we write fanfic after the author has specifically requested people not and post it in the comments here, no matter how tempting it may be. Carry on. oh god my inbox ow ow



*Just as a point of interest, I was a bookseller for 12 years, and had several customers tell me about the sex scenes in her books. Some were pro ("My friend told me to read these books for the sex scenes, and she was totally right, they are so hot, this is best thing to happen to my sex life in years!") and some were con ("What is up with all the sex all the time? Where's the story?"), but one thing you can't say about her books is that they're sexual-fantasy free. :D
(1880 comments | Leave a comment)

Friday, December 4th, 2009

NSFW Webcomic Artist Throwdown

[info]sadisticferret
NSFW NSFW NSFW

Questionable Content's Jeph Jacques and Shortpacked!'s Dave Willis have a little crossover going today, which leads to Willis posting this drawing of himself as the creator of QC in his LiveJournal. So far, so good.

In response, Jacques posts a VERY NSFW drawing of Willis being fucked by a dog and sucking a guy's cock. Without an LJ-cut. There is now an ETA stating (bolding his):

dear everyone bitching about how I should've put this behind a cut because bawwww I look at LJ at work and almost got in trouble waaaawwwwww

Maybe you shouldn't be looking at livejournal at work


And lo and behold, there are indeed many comments requesting a cut, and just as many making fun of those who did.

Willis responds with an equally NSFW drawing of Jacques eating poo right from the source. And it all goes downhill from there.

There is bonus discussion in the comments on Jacques' incorrect use of terminology, as he states that Willis is a dogfucker, but he's clearly being depicted as being fucked by a dog.

Also, beware of guro macros in the comments.
(196 comments | Leave a comment)

Saturday, July 25th, 2009

Russell T. Davies: Tinhat SPN Wincest Shipper! In other news, Torchwood wank.

[info]twinno
Spoilers for Torchwood and oh god great linky madness within. Enter at your own risk. )

This post brought to you by the ridiculously helpful mousies on [info]wank_report, the letter W and the number 4. (The W is for wut and 4 is how many cups of coffee I've already had today).
(574 comments | Leave a comment)

Sunday, July 5th, 2009

Comic book wank

[info]lerefuge
Some of you might know, but Shatterstar has officially come out of the closet in the latest issue with a kiss with Rictor, written by PAD. This character as originally created by Rob Liefeld (lol I know) and of course, he has something to say about this.

“… I have nothing against gays, I have gay family, nuthin’ but love here,”

“As the guy that created, designed and wrote his first dozen appearances, Shatterstar is not gay. Sorry. Can’t wait to someday undo this. Seems totally contrived.”


(He made those comments in his private forum that need an account for log in. This blog reported them)

It starts slow. Most people laugh and point. A bunch of commenters say this comment was rather homophobic and even tough Liefeld created the character, he retained no right on him, Furthermore, many posters comment that the reveal was long in the making and the romantic tension between Shatterstar and Rictor has been developped thoroughly.

It gets a bit more heated when PAD shows up in the comments to mock Liefield some more:
"I find particularly distressing Rob’s contention that Shatterstar can’t possibly be gay because he’s a warrior. That might come as a bit of a shock to Alexander the Great. For that matter, among his assortment of gay friends, I suppose Rob has none in the military since of course gays aren’t allowed to serve unless they keep their mouths shut. Perhaps Rob would like to see “don’t ask, don’t tell” implemented in the Marvel universe."

A few commenters don't agree with the accusation of bigotry and explain so but it stays rather civil. It gets more interesting when Liefield shows up, defending that he was misquoted and PAD is piling on for no reason.

PAD responds : Back in the old days I’d spend entire columns trying to figure out what you meant to say as opposed to what you actually said. But honestly, I don’t have that kind of time anymore. Trust me when I say that you’re not doing yourself any favors.

And he shows off his nice ego: "And just a thought, Rob: people are talking about Shatterstar for the first time in years. He’s making national news. Because of me. Maybe, just maybe, that’s the thing that’s pissing you off the most."

And just when you might think Liefeld is the reasonnable one in this, he throws out a stupid comment: "So anything other than, “Cool, they’re gay after 19 years and hundreds of appearancesl” in regards to Rictor and Shatterstar is unacceptable. Yeah, I didn’t get that memo. Maybe Jack Bauer will be next…." LOL wat. He then proceeds to prove his gay credentials and debate Batman/Robin.

The non existence of bisexuality even shows up! Party for everyone.

And they go some more back and forth and it's really hard to say who is being the biggest hairsplitter in this. Also, had no idea who Shatterstar was but now I kinda one to pick this issue up.
(515 comments | Leave a comment)

Saturday, March 14th, 2009

He was also responsible for doing the voice of Solid Snake

[info]firefly99
Watchmen screenwriter David Hayter writes a sincere but slightly tongue-in-cheek open letter on Hardcore Nerdity to Watchmen fans and non-fans, to urge them to see the movie more than once in order to understand it.

One of his other points is that he thinks those who hate the movie on principle without having seen it should let it marinate in their minds and give it a chance:

It may upset you. And it probably will upset you.

And all along, we really meant it to. ...All this time, you’ve been waiting for a director who was going to hit you in the face with this story. To just crack you in the jaw, and then bend you over the pool table with this story. With its utterly raw view of the darkest sides of human nature, expressed through its masks of action and beauty and twisted good intentions... Like the Comedian on the Grassy Knoll. ...You'll be thinking about this film, down the road. It'll nag at you. How it was rough and beautiful. How it went where it wanted to go, and you just hung on. How it was thoughtful and hateful and bleak and hilarious. And for Jackie Earle Haley.

Trust me. You'll come back, eventually. Just like Sally.


Comments begin in the 'we love Watchmen (although some of us have reservations about the swinging massive blue dong), go Dayter' mould, until people, from page three onwards, suddenly notice the metaphor he used to describe how the movie should make you feel:

DUDE. No one asks to be cracked in the jaw and bent over the goddamned pool table. Was there NO OTHER ANALOGY you could have used? Do you realize that you're comparing your movie to a rapist and the moviegoers to victims asking for it? And what is this "You'll come back. Just like Sally" crap? Do you have any f***ing idea how offensive that is? Could you not have come up with some other analogy, some other pithy tag, something that doesn't make it out like the Comedian was doing Silk Spectre a f***ing favor when he beat her bloody and tried to rape her?

Did you mean to do that?? If not, erm, consider your words more carefully next time you do the "open letter" thing, because wow, did that part get away from you.


Dayter comments on page 7 with an apology claiming he does not condone violence against women, which is edited into the original article. People briefly thank him for apologising, and then attack him again. Dayter responds graciously via huge spoonfuls of sarcasm and retracting his apology (page 8):

Clearly, you can't get less hateful or spewy than that. I humbly retract the statement.

Anyway, I'm sorry you disliked the film.

And you're right, I don't know why I ever set out to do this in the first place. It's really the world I'm hurting. Damn my family, and their almost-constant need for food!


On top of all of this there's huge amounts of movie rage, but the best thing about the whole altercation is the people at Hardcore Nerdity going so far as to make a video response urging people to LEAVE DAYTER ALONE, starring a very angry Dr. Manhattan.
(384 comments | Leave a comment)

Sunday, September 7th, 2008

Who's Missing the Torchwood Wank?

[info]aeka
Here's a recent addition to Torchwood wankage, brought to you by a kind anonymouse who submitted it to [info]wank_report, only this time with the added bonus of plagiarism on behalf of the unofficial torchwood guide author.

Funtimes as someone publishes an unofficial guide to Torchwood. Containing pages of reviews from fans on livejournal without their permission.
Amazon.com version
UK Amazon.com version

People are less than pleased.

whereas some are quite happy to be featured.

Leave the author alone!

Differing views of copyright laws

People suggesting going to the tabloids to get their own back.

Meme view:

Reply from author


Oh dear. I'd like to see what'll happen if this bloke makes a fortune on this guidebook and who will be the first LJer to actually initiate a lawsuit. Should be an interesting case to watch on the evening news.
(86 comments | Leave a comment)

Friday, August 29th, 2008

And the Twilight Wank Saga continues with an author flounce...

[info]ilya
As a lot of you must know by now, the first 12 Chapters of Midnight Sun, Smeyer's addition to her Uh-may-zing boooookes was leaked on the internet several days ago, and this has chagrined her dazzle verily.

From her official website:

August 28, 2008 (part II)

As some of you may have heard, my partial draft of Midnight Sun was illegally posted on the Internet and has since been virally distributed without my knowledge or permission or the knowledge or permission of my publisher.

I have a good idea of how the leak happened as there were very few copies of Midnight Sun that left my possession and each was unique. Due to little changes I made to the manuscript at different times, I can tell when each left my possession and to whom it was given. The manuscript that was illegally distributed on the Internet was given to trusted individuals for a good purpose. I have no comment beyond that as I believe that there was no malicious intent with the initial distribution.

I did not want my readers to experience Midnight Sun before it was completed, edited and published. I think it is important for everybody to understand that what happened was a huge violation of my rights as an author, not to mention me as a human being. As the author of the Twilight Saga, I control the copyright and it is up to the owner of the copyright to decide when the books should be made public; this is the same for musicians and filmmakers. Just because someone buys a book or movie or song, or gets a download off the Internet, doesn't mean that they own the right to reproduce and distribute it. Unfortunately, with the Internet, it is easy for people to obtain and share items that do not legally belong to them. No matter how this is done, it is still dishonest. This has been a very upsetting experience for me, but I hope it will at least leave my fans with a better understanding of copyright and the importance of artistic control.

So where does this leave Midnight Sun? My first feeling was that there was no way to continue. Writing isn't like math; in math, two plus two always equals four no matter what your mood is like. With writing, the way you feel changes everything. If I tried to write Midnight Sun now, in my current frame of mind, James would probably win and all the Cullens would die, which wouldn't dovetail too well with the original story. In any case, I feel too sad about what has happened to continue working on Midnight Sun, and so it is on hold indefinitely.

I'd rather my fans not read this version of Midnight Sun. It was only an incomplete draft; the writing is messy and flawed and full of mistakes. But how do I comment on this violation without driving more people to look for the illegal posting? It has taken me a while to decide how and if I could respond. But to end the confusion, I've decided to make the draft available here (at the end of this message on the Midnight Sun page). This way, my readers don't have to feel they have to make a sacrifice to stay honest. I hope this fragment gives you further insight into Edward's head and adds a new dimension to the Twilight story. That's what inspired me to write it in the first place.

I do want to take a moment and thank the wonderful fans who have been so supportive of me over the past three years. I cannot begin to tell you how much each of you means to me. I only hope this note will stop all the confusion and online speculation so that the Twilight universe can once again become the happy escape it used to be. After this incredibly busy year, I am now focusing on spending more time with my family and working on some other writing projects.

--Stephenie

I don't think I need to add much more than that.  Lol.  This is so bloody beautiful...Oh Smeyer...please to be going over there to cry upon your pile of ill-begotten millions.  We all know that that book is going to be finished and published eventually so that you can add to your dragon hoard of booty. 

Who else thinks that she's just waaaaahing for the sympathy and threatening to not provide any more crack so that everyone can forget about the epic fail that was Breaking Dawn and start kissing her ass again? *raises hand*

Edit:

And we get reactions from the Amazon Boards and the ♥ TwiMoms ♥. The ONTD comm weighs in on the situation.

And the NuttyMadam reacts. Though sorry, there's no vid this time since she took it down. But here, have a transcription of the lost vid, courtesy of [info]aegflota

We are all a bunch of meanies hiding away in this little club house of ours.

Smeyer Ego stroking.

Bonus Snack: The Twimoms just cannot leave the poor boy alone!. There's wankiness in the second link, as the TwiMom in the picture appears and asks for her photo to be taken down. Also, Here is a step by step instruction manual on how to go about your Pretty Vampire Actors stalking, for you n00bs who have no idea how to go about it. It is illustrated and everything. The TwiMoms are nothing, if not thorough.

OH NOES YOU GUISE! They be calling the FBI on us!!! WHAT DO WE DO? WHAT DO WE DO?

Twilight is going to save our country from the evil lesbians so you'd better all stop dissing it!

Cleolinda Midnight Sun Commentary! Yay. Lol.

ETA:How do you gain respect for your much derided favorite author? Why, by starting an online petition for it, of course!
(2761 comments | Leave a comment)

Wednesday, August 20th, 2008

The Battle of Versailles

[info]seca
Small wank but some of us need a break from Twilight wank, y/n?

So what happens when an obscure American musician finds out that a Japanese indie band that just might be less obscure has the same name as the one you've already picked. Well if the name is Versailles you copyright the name and threaten legal action against the Japanese band for stealing the name from you. Because you know there's no way that they could have been inspired by the French city the name comes from being as they are a visual kei band that uses the glory days of French aristocratic society as their band's theme.

Needless to say the wank is easy to find from both sides in the US Versailles myspace page.

And wank from JP Versailles can be found a few places like the Last.fm shoutbox for JP Versailles and the Jrock Revolution Versailles board that has their announcement that they will be changing their name so they can continue performing in the U.S.
(106 comments | Leave a comment)

Monday, July 28th, 2008

Epilogue Wank, Twilight Style

[info]tehrin
Mucho gracias to the folks over on [info]wank_report. AND A SPOILER WARNING WITH EXTRA SPARKLES FOR TWILIGHT FANS. I suggest Twilight fans who actually care that much about being spoiled avoid this post like the plague.

Why do I feel we've been through this before? )
ETA: Fixed the tag on the last link. Sorry, folks.
ETA3: A support request was entered by someone claiming to be from a law firm, claiming to represent the publishing group with a pretty much standard letter that has been going around like a strain of herpes to people leaking the book or even discussing spoilers (julian_black explains exactly why here). I don't think intellectual property laws work that way.

text can be found here )


Other posts concerning the leaks can be found here and a twilight_news (thanks to [info]hooloovoo_too). Possible confirmation of some of the spoilers has also sparked more wank over here.

There's some more fun over at ontd (the macros start on page 2). The OP itself only concerns the movie, but that doesn't stop people from wanking over the spoilers.

ETA4: system is love.

Go System! )

And there's now been blurry confirmation on spoilers (thanks to [info]miraba).

ETA5: Ok, guys, lay off the Mormons or I'm going to have to ask you to get out of the pool. I really, really, REALLY hate to quote [info]mcity but plz no Mormon bashing. Let's have some class.

ETA6: SMeyer allegedly wrote a parody version of Breaking Dawn according to this EW article (thanks to [info]greenconverses).
(1839 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, June 26th, 2008

IT'S NOT CALLED GLOW IN THE DARK FOR NO REASON SQUID BRAINS!

[info]llama_treats
Kanye West goes insane on his blog after his performance at the Bonnaroo Festival is delayed and the fans are mean to him. (But not insane enough to forget to stick a Mac Air reference in his MOSTLY CAPS rant - keep those ad revenue checks coming in, Kanye.) Cue the usual WE LUV U KANYE vs KANYE SUX comments everywhere.


...His new song, Squid Brains, is sure to be a hit. (OK, I'm wishing here.)
(193 comments | Leave a comment)

Monday, June 23rd, 2008

Fail mods are failing

[info]sepiamagpie
Dearest, beloved, Fandom Wank.

I know you were looking forward to great excitement today. Some of you said words to me that indicated you anticipated fiery 'judgement' upon those who remained fresh and dewey white, those you call n00bs.

Anyway, you got today instead.

Stop anticipating things, we'll just break your hearts.


Sincerely,

Sepia P. Magpie, Esq.



PS: Use this post to reflect on how you could be better people. Or just fuck around in the comments.
(258 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, January 3rd, 2008

Red Beans Anne Rice

[info]criticalcricket
The last Anne Rice wank jogged a little memory in my mind. Way back in antiquity, I remembered an incident where Anne took out various full page ads in the local newspaper in order to harass a local restaurateur. That's right, before she had the internet, she wanked the old fashioned way...in the newspaper! I hunted down the story to share with a friend and I thought, might as well share with everyone else. Without further ado, I bring you Classic Wank!

First of all, in 1995 Anne released Memnoch the Devil. In the book, the vampire Lestat sees his reflection in the window of an abandoned car dealership on St. Charles Avenue and bids farewell to the world or something like that. It was a real building not far from her New Orleans home.

Two years later, a local restaurateur, Al Copeland, bought the mentioned building and turned it into a restaurant. But it was not just any restaurant, it was Straya, a big bright peach colored building full of neon lights and other gaudy decoration. Here's a picture for reference, though it doesn't do the color justice. The interior was equally "eyecatching" and described as "what I'd envision a classy bordello in '50s Havana [to be]." So it was an interesting place that raised a few eyebrows.

It did more than raise Anne Rice's eyebrow. On February 8th, Anne left a phone message for her fans in which she made a few comments about Art Deco and freedom of speech. Why? She seemed to be explaining to them why she took out a full page ad in the local newspaper to call the Copeland's restaurant a "monstrosity" and "nothing short of an abomination" and to tell Mr. Copeland that he should be ashamed. Unfortunately, I have had no luck finding the original ad or subsequent replies in their entirety, so all quotes are from other stories on the crazy in The New York Times (twice), Time Magazine and Nation's Restaurant News.

Not one to take it lying down, Copeland returned fire by taking out his own two page ad in the paper with before and after pictures of the building, defense of his decor, and a promise to see her in court. He sued her for defamation and libel.

Anne posted another phone message on February 9th. Yet another phone message on the 13th of February bragged that people supported her in phone messages because popular opinion polls had the locals supporting Copeland. In fact, other restaurants in the area took out their own ad to support Copeland and welcome him to the area.

Somewhere along the line, Copeland said that Anne was pissed because he bought the building that was Lestat's last resting place. He said he had never bargained on a vampire, but now that he had Lestat he was keeping him. Anne replied with another full page ad written by Lestat! In it 'Lestat' said "Mr. Copeland, nothing short of your indescribable restaurant could shock me out of my torpor and my coma. I am now myself again. It is nothing short of a stroke of genius on your part to create a restaurant that will be immortalized in history, legend and literature."

As if all that wasn't enough, Anne had been talking about opening her own little restaurant, Cafe Lestat, in the same area. She discusses it quite often in her phone posts spinning out one fanciful idea after another. She insists that she isn't competition for Copeland. Either way it seems that her idea never got off the ground.
In her phone messages, between waxing poetic on Cafe Lestat, she just can't seem to get over the fact that she is being sued as he continues to mention if on March 3rd and March 10th.

The lawsuit was eventually thrown out of court, but not before the issue became a subject of great amusement to the locals. A fellow author of vampire lore called the debacle "a gift from the gods to us little people.Another author recalls how "a whole brigade of revelers appeared wearing plates of rice and beans around their waists, promoting a dish they called Red Beans Anne Rice". Obviously fun times were had by all as everyone pointed and laughed.

Edit: Rejoice! Some of the original texts have been found by [info]miss_eponine.

And here's a little info about Anne's own property buying binge in which she pissed off local residents from [info]thebratqueen.
(272 comments | Leave a comment)

Friday, November 23rd, 2007

Patricia Cornwall Upset by Amazon Reviews [Insert Your Anne Rice Joke Here]

[info]narcissam
Either the Bush administration has moved on to oppressing hack crime novelists, or Patricia Cornwell has lostj is continuing to lose? her marbles. You be the judge. From the news section on her website:

'We have reason to suspect that someone (or a group of someones) might be mobilizing people to attack me through Amazon and Barnes and Noble, etc., to hurt my sales and reputation.' )The call to arms has apparently been heard. The Amazon reviews for her latest book have been flooded with posts like this:

"This book is a good choice. Loved it...great forensic expertise! Life is complex and living life brings change. These negative reviews are absolute rubbish."

The original post currently doesn't show on Patricia Cornwall's site, so it may have been pulled on further reflection, but I've got screencaps: One, Two, Three.

I picked this up from the blog Dear Author, which engagingly riffs on Cornwell's post.
(61 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, October 18th, 2007

Rob Liefeld to Alan Moore: You are nothing without meeee!

[info]pipssister
Orange County Weekly writes a profile on Rob Liefeld, in which the lord of pouches and women with poofy white hair provides us with his deep thoughts.

Article excerpts )

Anyway, not content to merely be an odd cookie, in a supplement on the profilers blog, Liefeld decides to attack the much odder (although believed to be more talented) cookie in the comics medium: Alan Moore.

We didn't get the right artist for him until about ten issues in, then the second year, they put together a great run. That 24 issues was as well-received a comic as you're gonna find, I still meet people who are like, wow, that was great, but we had no input. That was Alan. And to me, honestly, that was Alan's last great stuff. Because when Awesome, my main investor went belly up --my investor had a video game company, a recording company, andf a comic book company, and overnight, they were all gone -- and Alan, I think had really dug what he was doing with us, because by then he'd expanded it from Supreme to Youngblood, to Glory...I still have all his original proposals, they're a riot, dude. He's definitely taking archetypes and doing the Alan Moore version...I called him up one time and said, 'Hey Alan, how about we do a Teen Titans style book,' and he went quiet and he goes 'That's what Youngblood is.' I thought that was our Avengers-type book."

"But then he took that formula and just kinda did that same thing, I mean, Tom Strong is Supreme, it's flattering that he found his groove back with us and started winning awards back with us because people forget, he'd fallen off the map, you can't really find a great Alan Moore book from '90 to like '96, when he did Supreme, even the stuff he did for Todd [McFarlane] was derided like he was asleep at the wheel, like he didn't care because it was campy, whereas with Supreme he gave it that Silver Age with a twist, and nobody was doing that. And again, what he did for Supreme was ripped off for the next five years by all the other writers. He's always been a trendsetter."

"If you've done business with Alan, you have a different opinion of Alan. He markets himself as a poet, but he's just a ruthless businessman, like everybody else, he kept wanting to more work because he just wanted to get paid. Jeph Loeb, he can tell you."


Fans do not react well to this:

Read more... )

Of course, Rob Liefeld fans call OPPRESSIUN by the hat0rz:
Read more... )

There's also some "Alan Moore's magic is just like your belief in God!" mini wank, but it doesn't bring much funneh so let's not care.

Then, on the Newsarama blog post, Rob decides to play with the anti-fans.

Alan makes deals, then decides later that it wasn't good enough, torches the previous deal, pouts and goes back to his corner.

He killed his Wildstorm deal, he balked when I wouldn't accept Steven Moore as the next Supreme writer for his year 3 project, He killed the Watchman toys that DC had set to roll 10 years back ... for what good reason? He said he would bad mouth them so DC backed off and killed all the merchandise.

He's a great writer when motivated, no different than most others. He hides behind principle while he has his hand out for more control and or more money than he previously negotiated.

And if all his magic nonsense is real then why didn't he go into the dream realm before he wrote Watchmen and see the future success he would achieve and decide to keep all the rights to himself?

Anyways, I'm perfectly satisfied with all my Alan Moore stories and look forward to future collections and perhaps having his earlier Supreme issues re-drawn.


Some fans disagree with Liefeld's interpretation of the events. Others go "LOL! You still can't draw feet, dork!" And so it goes.

ETA: The wank as told by dinosaurs
(229 comments | Leave a comment)

Sunday, March 25th, 2007

When Sci-Fi Writers Attack!

[info]cleolinda

Science Fiction Writers of America kerfuffles, courtesy of [info]rachelmanija and an anonymouse on [info]wank_report:

John Scalzi (quick recap: occasionally enjoys baiting readers on the topic of fanfic; invented schadenfreude pie; likes taping bacon to cats) has decided to throw his hat into the ring for the SFWA presidency after discovering that someone he disagrees with ("Mainly over how to handle copyright in the age of the internet," quoth the nonnymouse) was running unopposed. (It's, uh, a write-in hat.) Derryl Murphy then joins up as a write-in VP candidate.

Aaaaand the wank starts up. Well gee Mary, don't go nailing yourself on the cross so quickly for your pal! )

ETA: Scalzi apologizes. Read more... )

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Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

"We are laughing so hard - but also GETTING YOU FIRED!"

[info]firebad
Quintessential novelist L.B. Wilshere-Cumming's Intarweb Lawyer/Agent has something to say. Shame on you, fandom_wank. Shame on you for trying to bring down such a brave little soldier.

ETA: The Author herself speaks! And appears to suffer from the same Parentheses Disease as her esteemed agent!

SON OF ETA: "Lionel Austin", Sockpuppet-At-Law, has shown up on the journal of the original wank's poster, [info]varesh. Threats and demands and legalese, oh my!

DAUGHTER OF ETA: Bahleeted! Screencap of "Lionel's" original rant here. Anyone get The Author's site?

MOTHER-IN-LAW OF ETA, SHEESH: The requisite demand on Journalfen's support page for the wank to be taken down or face LEGUL AKSHON is here.
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Monday, February 19th, 2007

When your plans to splooge the world with your own ego-stroking just *doesn't* make the cut...

[info]varesh
Hi all, first post here. I hope I don't disappoint. Let me know if I do.

This is a bit of an "archived" bit of ego-stroking-mess, as it's old, and a good number of the sources have died out. Hope this subject hasn't been covered before... but this chick's still alive and kicking, and growing worse by the minute.

Meet [info]eternalforest. Well, her publicist, anyway--- if we're to go by posts she's they've who-the-fuck-ever's made in the past, constantly referring to the blogger as "The Author". She's written a novel called "Eternal Forest of the Soul" among a few other things. She's put up her own website at angelfire.com to promote her works. If you click that link, you'll see how incredibly pleased she is with herself.

She's also very pleased with her thesaurus, judging by this blurb from EFotS:

The dominant adverb culls the weak text from the herd... )

So what's this got to do with fandom?

There was once an lj-user that went by the name of [info]hothobbitgirl. Note that I said "went", as in past tense. This girl was HUGE in the LotR fandom, perving on Frolijah specifically. Proof of her existence (and perviness) can be found in various places. Her perviness and obsession included everything from making manips of her, her husband and Frodo in bed together to planning on going to conventions to interview Sean Astin with her "production company".

It wasn't long before hothob wanted to get her work published, and created--- yep, [info]eternalforest. All of a sudden, gone was the obsessive fanaticism over the LotR boys and hobbits. The world wept as EF's journal disallowed comments, and all that was left was a girl a publicist who-the-frick-ever obsessed with her original fiction.

Then came a dark day, when she posted this in her journal this past June:

Glad I saved this, cuz she decided to erase it... )

So her NEW journal here is full of post titles like Absolutely stunning images now up on the website, This is for those who asked for some personal guidance, and Reflection&Wonder: a sermon on life... well, the urpley-purpley-flowery-adverb-infected prose gets to be a bit too much.

Needless to say, just about everyone's defriended this sack of baloney. When your site shoves ads at you when you open each page, has gads of photos of you posing by your *self published book* that you stick haphazardly onto shelves right next to J.K.'s and J.R.R.'s work to make yourself look good, and post loads of photos showing you at book signings where the quantity of books on the table neither increase nor decrease as time moves on and your grandparents show up to make you look good, things just ain't gonna fare that well.

EDIT: One of the links in "various places" doesn't work. Sorry... um...
REVISED EDIT of Edit: Thanks, [info]jrs1980 for pointing out how to make the link WORK. ;)


The moral of this story? Stick to hobbit-pr0n. You look more dignified that way.

Details I'd forgotten: An anon pointed this out; someone's embarrassed about being (blank)-published. She's whined mentioned many times that she's against sending one's manuscript out to EBUL PUBLISHERS, and that it's best to (blank)-publish. Can't find the link where she states that philosophy... darn, USED to be up... I'll keep looking...
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Friday, January 12th, 2007

Bad Review = Personal Attack!

[info]amyheartssiroc
Found this over at Smart Bitches Trashy Books and thought it was wanky enough to share. Over at Amazon.com, M.A. Bechaz reviews Evangelynn Stratton's novel Lady Blue. Her review is less than kind, and focuses mostly on the novel's historical inaccuracies.

About as accurate as Hogan's Heroes... )

There is a lot of tl;dr wank on both sides, beginning when Anne Hope responds quite maturely with a review entitled M. A. Bechaz from Australia is a bitter hag.

If you bitch about historical accuracy, you obviously don't have a life. )

Samantha also jumps in to defend the author:

No one cares if Willow had a teapot! )

Lee C. is also quite valiant in her efforts:

If you want historical accuracy, go read a textbook! )

The battle continues in the comments for both reviews, where M.A. Bechaz shows up to defend herself:

Where do you find the time in your busy life to insult me? )


Where did you go to school, anyway? )


My reviews are more unbiased than yours. )


Nothing says medieval times like a damsel in distress because she's lost her iPod... )
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