Monday, March 18th, 2013

And the winner is...

[info]snacky
Msscribe! She defeated Crystalwank easily in the end, and who was really surprised? I am sure she's out there somewhere, cackling over this latest triumph in her quest to dominate fandom. :D

Thanks for playing along! I hope you all had a good time. I don't know if we'll do this ever again, but it was fun to go back to all the old wanks and take a stroll down memory lane.
(96 comments | Leave a comment)

Sunday, March 17th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, FINALS

[info]snacky
Both of yesterday's battles were closer than I had expected, in the beginning at least. But once Msscribe and Crystalwank gained momentum, there was no stopping them (which is actually kind of true for the wanks and the wankers, now that I think about it), sorry Mrs. Horse and Snapewives.

But as Sep said: "Harry Potter and Lotr wanks in the end: Just as God intended."

Now there can only be one.

Poll #599
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Crystalwank
113 (33.7%)

Msscribe
222 (66.3%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: A THREAT!

ETA 2: As of 3/18/13, 9:38 am EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after that time, it will not be counted and will not change the winner. The Deathmatch is over, folks. Go home. :D
(96 comments | Leave a comment)

Saturday, March 16th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, semifinals

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: His wife? A horse, Crystalwank, Msscribe, and Snapewives on an Astral Plane. That last one was a real nailbiter, and I cannot believe that Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction actually lost to the Snapewives. SHOCKING UPSET!

But here we are at the semifinals, to determine the final two contestants. Let's get right to it!

Poll #598
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

His wife? A horse
130 (43.2%)

Crystalwank
171 (56.8%)

You choose:

View Answers

Msscribe
220 (72.4%)

Snapewives on an Astral Plane
84 (27.6%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: As of 3/17/13, 9:52 am EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after that time, it will not be counted and will not change the winners of this round.
(51 comments | Leave a comment)

Friday, March 15th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, quarterfinals

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: Chancery Stone, Msscribe, Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction, and the Snapewives. My heart breaks at the loss of the Domlijah tinhats, but somehow, I will carry on.

Okay, it's the quarterfinals today! Which means the semis are tomorrow and the finals are Sunday, so mark your calendars!

Let's get to voting. Sorry, no ticky boxes. :D

Poll #597
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

His wife? A horse
231 (77.3%)

Dumbledore is gay
68 (22.7%)

You choose:

View Answers

Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective)
96 (32.7%)

Crystalwank
198 (67.3%)

You choose:

View Answers

Chancery Stone
34 (11.4%)

Msscribe
263 (88.6%)

You choose:

View Answers

Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction
142 (47.7%)

Snapewives on an Astral Plane
156 (52.3%)



Ready? VOTE.


ETA: As of 3/16/13, 10:05 am EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after that time, it will not be counted and will not change the winners of this round.
(58 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, March 14th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, second round, part 2

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: His wife? A horse, Dumbledore is gay, Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective), and Crystalwank. Some of those were pretty close, and the hate-filled ponies couldn't trample Anne Rice. Perhaps there is only room in this deathmatch for one equine-related wank?

Let's get to today's battles. Some tough matches here!

Poll #596
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Chancery Stone
197 (68.2%)

Perhaps I have a special anus?
92 (31.8%)

You choose:

View Answers

Laptopgate
35 (11.8%)

Msscribe
262 (88.2%)

You choose:

View Answers

Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction
188 (63.5%)

Domlijah tinhats
108 (36.5%)

You choose:

View Answers

Snapewives
178 (59.7%)

Lexicongate
120 (40.3%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: As of 3/15/13, 9:00 am EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after that time, it will not be counted and will not change the winners of this round.
(58 comments | Leave a comment)

Wednesday, March 13th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, second round, part 1

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction, Domlijah tinhats, Snapewives on an Astral Plane, and Lexicongate. I have to say, the triumph of the Domlijah tinhats warms the cockles of my black, shriveled heart, and I was worried for them there for a while!

Okay, today's the start of the second round. The matches get tougher from here on in. Are you ready?

Poll #595
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Bartending in the dark
71 (24.1%)

His wife? A horse
223 (75.9%)

You choose:

View Answers

Dumbledore is gay
179 (61.7%)

God's magical pubic hairs
111 (38.3%)

You choose:

View Answers

Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective)
175 (59.5%)

My ponies hate you now.
119 (40.5%)

You choose:

View Answers

Strikethrough 2: Electric Boogaloo (Aja yells "Fire!")
74 (25.3%)

Crystalwank
218 (74.7%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: As of 3/14/13, 9:25 am EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after that time, it will not be counted and will not change the winners of this round.
(50 comments | Leave a comment)

Tuesday, March 12th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, first round, part 4

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: Chancery Stone, Perhaps I have a special anus?, Laptopgate, and Msscribe. I think if our voting patterns show us anything, it's that we really love catchphrases, and we really can't stop obsessing about Chancery Stone. :D

Today is the last of the first round contestants! Links to all can be found here if you need to brush up. Vote early and often. I mean. Just early.

Poll #594
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Victoria Bitter/Jordan Wood/Andy Blake/thanfiction
270 (90.3%)

Hellfire and Jira and incest and racism
29 (9.7%)

You choose:

View Answers

BJR outwalks a hurricane
130 (43.6%)

Domlijah tinhats
168 (56.4%)

You choose:

View Answers

Snapewives on an Astral Plane
212 (70.4%)

Lady Sybilla and Russet Noon
89 (29.6%)

You choose:

View Answers

Deletiongate and Fandom_Love
71 (23.7%)

Lexicongate
229 (76.3%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: If there is even a hint of trans*-related fail in the comments, there will be bannings, and I will disqualify that match.

ETA 2: As of 3/13/13, 9:35 a.m. EST, this poll is closed. If you vote after this time, it will not count/change any of the winners.
(122 comments | Leave a comment)

Monday, March 11th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, first round, part 3

[info]snacky
Yesterday's winners: Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective), My ponies hate you now, Strikethrough 2: Electric Boogaloo (in which Aja yells "Fire!"), and Crystalwank.

Time for the next round! Links to all the contestants can be found here for your reading pleasure.

Poll #593
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Chancery Stone
165 (59.8%)

Frosting/icing wank
111 (40.2%)

You choose:

View Answers

Perhaps I have a special anus?
210 (78.4%)

Cousinjean
58 (21.6%)

You choose:

View Answers

Please Lord Voldemort, join my ratings community
68 (24.2%)

Laptopgate
213 (75.8%)

You choose:

View Answers

Msscribe
257 (90.8%)

Kittenmommy signs her posts
26 (9.2%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: This poll is closed as of 3/12/13, 9:50 a.m. EST. If you vote after that, it will not count.
(55 comments | Leave a comment)

Sunday, March 10th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, first round, part 2

[info]snacky
Congratulations to Bartending in the dark, His wife? A horse, Dumbledore is gay, and God's Magical Pubic Hairs - they all move forward to the next round. No real surprises there, except for God's Magical Pubic Hairs - I wasn't sure that could beat Usagi Kou, but it triumphed in the end.

Are you ready for the next round? Links to the wanks are found here, if you need a refresher.

Poll #592
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

FPB
73 (26.1%)

Anne Rice (interrogating the text from the wrong perspective)
207 (73.9%)

You choose:

View Answers

Clan Mitchell
103 (36.9%)

My ponies hate you now
176 (63.1%)

You choose:

View Answers

Strikethrough 2: Electric Boogaloo (in which Aja yells "Fire!")
176 (64.5%)

Inner Circle Wank (in which Aja is the twattiest twat in twatsville)
97 (35.5%)

You choose:

View Answers

Crystalwank
241 (86.7%)

Dan Fogelberg's llamas
37 (13.3%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: Polls are closed as of 3/11/13, 9:15 a.m. EST. You can vote after that, but it won't count.
(66 comments | Leave a comment)

Saturday, March 9th, 2013

Tenth Anniversary Deathmatch, first round, part 1

[info]snacky
Hello, fandom_wank! Are you ready to vote?

Here's how this will go: I will post a new round every day. You have until the next day's post to vote in that round. Then we move on to next round, with all the first round winners, the quarterfinals, the semi-finals, and the final round on Sunday, March 17th.

Refer to this post for links to all the contestants.

Poll #591
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You choose:

View Answers

Lee Goldberg
87 (32.1%)

Bartending in the dark
184 (67.9%)

You choose:

View Answers

His wife? A horse
254 (93.7%)

The Biting Faery and incest is creepy
17 (6.3%)

You choose:

View Answers

Dumbledore is gay
151 (56.8%)

Diana Gabaldon has an opinion on fanfic
115 (43.2%)

You choose:

View Answers

God's magical pubic hairs
141 (54.2%)

Usagi Kou
119 (45.8%)



Ready? VOTE.

ETA: Interestingly, there is no option to close a poll on JF (unlike on LJ). As of 3/10/13, 10:30 a.m. EST, this poll is closed. I can't stop you if you vote after that, but no votes will be counted after that point.
(47 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, March 7th, 2013

MOD ANNOUNCEMENT: Fandom_wank Tenth Anniversary!

[info]snacky
Hello, wankas!

To celebrate our tenth anniversary on JF, we will be having a deathmatch of the biggest wankers/wanks we've seen in our ten years here (if you are familiar with the deathmatches I host on Livejournal, this will be done in a similar fashion).

Starting on Saturday, March 9, we will begin posting polls, and you can vote for one contestant in each match. By March 17th (actual anniversary date) we will have worked our way down to the two biggest vote-getters, and you will vote for the winner in a final poll.

The contestants are both wank all-stars (people), and some of biggest/most popular wanks. Thanks for all your suggestions in the last post! Here's the list:

The contestants! )

So read up on all those and review, and we'll see you on Saturday when the voting begins!
(80 comments | Leave a comment)

Thursday, February 28th, 2013

MOD ANNOUNCEMENT

[info]snacky
Hello, fandom_wank! I have two things to announce, are you ready?

First: The wiki is down. Yes, it has been down for a while. We are aware of this and working to return it. I have no estimated time on its return, unfortunately, but please know that we are aware and hoping to have it restored soon.

Second: This March marks our ten year anniversary here on Journalfen. Perhaps you would like to give me a list of your favorite wanks in the comments?

NO, NO, NOT FOR ANY SPECIFIC REASON. >.>

Thank you for your time!

ETA: Your favorite wanks can be from ANY of these(not just FW):

otf_wank
clairvoyantwank
i_wank
dl_anon
wankitywank
hp_cornfield
fw_debate
wank_report
fandom_lounge
fandom_rant
fwgreatesthits

Yes, some of these are not technically wank comms, but wank has happened there, so feel free to include it!
(179 comments | Leave a comment)