Say you're a member of ontd_ai and you're getting a bit tired of the fanfic posts, the idol appreciation posts, the way a particular mod runs things, and anything else you feel doesn't fit the ~true spirit~ of the community. There's only one thing to do!

Start a super-secret elite comm where you and 26 of your friends (including some ontd_ai mods) can plan the upheaval of the 5000-member community, including abrupt fanfic banning and gif trolling of appreciation posts and anyone who objects, or course!

This involved heavily trolling an appreciation post for Megan, one of the AI competitors from the latest season, with gifs and insults. EDIT2: Found it! There are pockets of drama all over the place, but the big stuff is on page six here.

( this is getting long, so i'm cutting it )

A Loyala University professor does, and I'm not kidding, a soshul experiment on City of Heroes. Long story short (because long article is long), David Myers, in his persona of "Twixt", is a general asshat in the game and then gets a paper out of talking about how awesome his character was and how mean people were to him.

If that mess wasn't wanky enough, arguments have broken out in the comments. Some feel that since "Twixt" wasn't breaking any rules, nobody has a right to complain.
( Heroic cut! )

EDIT: Sorry, I went out before this made it through the queue. Cut is in place now.

Information culled from an anonymouse source on wank_report.

Daddy's Little Cannibal was a Twilight fic writer, and apparently quasi-BNF enough to merit at least one interview, with 43 stories to her name that garnered multiple awards. Her most popular story was Cigarette Burns, which her twin sister is now posting for her posthumously.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention. Daddy's Little Cannibal died on May 8, 2009, after being involved in an accident with a drunk driver.
( Tragery! Or something else? )

The end! ... or is it?

Is it a social experiment? Attention seeking? Was she just tired of flitting from xanga to xanga and craved a more dramatic way to disassociate herself from her previous activities? And who is the anonymous source on wank_report - grudge? overzealous detective wanting to show off their leet snooping skills? or one of the wankers, trying to garner more attention? Only time - and possible ETAs - will tell!

ETA: I found a single now-deleted flame c&p'ed by other authors on FF.net.

Previously, on Moonlight: Busgate 2008:

In the last episode, the Moonlight kerfluffle, (reported here in the original wank report) we had $11k missing and people demanding answers for it. For a dramatic week, people wondered if there'd ever be an end to it all.

Finally, we get some relief as Leeser's payment goes through and kayspleen reports that she is satisfied.

But it's not over yet... dun dun dun!
( Read on, for more! )

Will rijane and the other winners ever see their vials? Will the board implode under the weight of all the drama? Will Leeser ever cough up any explanations for anything? Will Kate post again on any other non-issues? Will the fanfic writers gain access to their fanfic again?

Stay tuned, true believers, for the next episode of Moonlight Line: Busgate 2008, Electric Boogalo!

Disclaimer: There is no way one can possibly write this up and get ALL the links available on this. I cherry picked what I thought were the best tidbits of this on going drama that's getting huge enough to rival Godzilla.

ETA the first!: Even the Germans are smelling something foul.

And let's not forget the propeller story, for it has tasty details as well. Thank you killer_gopher.

ETA's mother: Quick, everyone, look busy, we've been spotted!

Many thanks to Lila from the MLL board for providing details on the ghosts of Eris. So far, we have MyImaginaryFriend, gandhhi, BooBerry, Chaos, Inara, Addiecurly, and CaptainJackMorgan.

ETA's mother's cousin: Rijane's revenge has been enacted.

ETA's mother's cousin's best friend: Moonpies? No seriously, MOONPIES?

ETA's mother's cousin's best friend's ex-girlfriend: The Fleur de Lis reference explained.

ETA's mother's cousin's best friend's ex-girlfriend's dog: Thanks to ari_o, we now have the Moonlight Bingo Card.

ETA's mother's cousin's best friend's ex-girlfriend's dog's chew toy: Flashback scene! Leeser apparently tried to run her own church and PRE-SCHOOL.

ETA So what does that make us?: Ads are up!

ETAs galore. cleolinda, how in the world did you keep up with this?

Another flashback to a time when Leeser was more godlike.

The proposed ad itself.

Another mod flees from the board.

Some of the snowflakes have realized the error of their ways.

Rijane is in a car accident, and we blame Leeser somehow.

More questions that likely will never get answers.

Today's ETA is... elizabuff goes right back to wanking. Anyone surprised?

And another large ETA: Leeser's school was apparently just another scam.

What follows is an account written by swsa, a friend without a JF account, and it is such a classic take-the-money-and-run story that I present it to you unaltered (well, okay, I threw in some links).


In Moonlight fandom, their high priestess of campaigning is named Leeser. Leeser's status in the fandom grew and grew as she organized fan cons, did the leg work for their Variety ad, etc. She is absolutely beloved and a hero of their cause. Which is why another fan apparently felt secure enough to give her $11000 in order to pay for bus ads to run in L.A. ( This ends about as well as you might expect )

ETA ∞: I was waiting to update until the supposed Leeser-vindicating deadline this afternoon, but it looks like... I don't even know what. So:

The donor updates:

The ad agency has stated they cannot confirm whether the funds are available or not. The New York office is placing at least a 3-5 day hold on Lesser's account in order to verify funding with the bank, however it may be longer. They are now hoping to be able to post this account on Friday. The ads have arrived and are waiting in the warehouse. Lesser is aware of this. I am so angry at this moment I dare not say too much more. One thing I must say though is to Lesser: Shame on you! To put me through this is one of the most unconscionable deeds I have experienced in my life.

Also: Homophobia on Leeser's board? Convention money shenanigans? Sockpuppetry? (Note: the Blue Whale Pub board seems to be down at the moment.)

ETA ∞ +1: And now about $8K in convention funds cannot be accounted for. (More.) Yes, we are pretty sure this is not VB on the rampage again.

ETA ∞ +2: I think dhaunea called this one...

ETA ∞ +3:: The ads are going up on Monday?

ETA 9/29/08: Y'all, please somebody take this over and do a new entry or something. I can't keep up with all the board shenanigans now.

But a lot to do with wank.

Approximately seven trillion Batman communities have sprung up on LJ since The Dark Knight came out, including several devoted (ostensibly) to the funny, like fuckyou_batman, agents_of_chaos, and batman_lulz; these join a pre-existing Batman-funny comm, capslock_batman. They all look for lullz in different ways - fuckyou_batman by mocking fangirls, batman_lulz by posting endless macros, and so on. Soooo...what happens when two or more of these communities intersect?

That's right. Splat.

So, omguxie, industrious little joker fangirl, purveyor of lullz, and wanker that she is, has created a couple of these communities: batman_lulz and joker_lesbians (peep the macro of the Joker eating the pink taco). And her wank gets everywhere. (Tasty amuse-bouche wank to whet your appetite: You can only join if you're a big enough lesbian for omguxie! EDIT BAHLEETED!)

It starts with now-deleted spamming by anonymous agents of chaos (but not necessarily agents_of_chaos). Apparently, the spammers used all-caps; clearly - CLEARLY - this means they are from capslock_batman. Omguxie makes accusations to this effect. Capslock_batman, in turn, do not appreciate this. Omguxie comes to the post to CAPS THEM BACK. Much advising to CALM DOWN IT'S JUST THE INTERNET occurs. I just wonder how they can tell who's yelling and who's just, you know, posting in capslock.

But wait! That's only part of the wank!

Meanwhile, back at the batman_lulz, "The Joker" posts an advisory warning to his fangirls. This is not funny enough for the lulzians, no! Cue 593 comments, at this posting (edit: 670 now), split between playing along, telling him he's a lamer, and posting macros.

Lots and lots of macros. A good portion of these by omguxie: the rare sight of a mod spamming her own community.

SEE! Omguxie charm a steadfast FY_Ber with her IRL cuteness!

WITNESS! The Scarecrow's arrival!

GASP! As they fail at eating their own!

Over at batmanholyland omguxie has her own tag ("omguxie is annoying and we hate her"), but sadly, they're smart enough to friendslock everything. Don't you hate it when the wankers keep their wank to themselves?

ETA: They macro some more on the fourth page. And by "some more" I mean "a whole hell of a lot". WARNING: SOME IMAGES IN THE EDITED-IN LINKS VERY NSFW.

ETA II: Capslock_batman already disliked batman_lulz (and it's mutual), though I'm unable to discern exactly where this originally started; and omguxie is something of a modwhore.

Meet kyuuketsukirui. She writes reviews for SGA on her LJ , and recently reviewed a bunch of stories on mcshep_match. kyuuketsukirui commits the unpardonable fandom sin of saying she's disappointed in the latest mcshep_match stories and will be posting her reviews soon.

Meet lamardeuse. She doesn't approve of kyuuketsukirui's disappointment in the stories or her reviews and says so. Many people agree with her, in the process confusing concrit and reviews. kyuuketsuikirui shows up to politely disagree. lamardeuse and her friends don't respond well. darkrose brings in a bit of Earth logic, but it's not enough to leaven out the massive amount of Unclear On the Concept, alas.

So kyuuketsukirui writes a post clarifying her position on reviews and reviews of fanfic and fandom.

zillah975 makes a post about this whole civility/reviews/concrit situation, including a thread in which anatsuno laments that life on the Nice Side ain't all it's cracked up to be. telesilla does a post too.

No responses from lamardeuse and friends. At least, not publically. That wouldn't be civil, after all.

ETA: Supposedly lamardeuse was responding to lavvyan, though kyuuketsukirui's post seems to have been the back-breaking straw.

I found this at wank_report and have too much time on my hands this week. There were 333 comments when I started the recap.

MTV.com has a Twilight Tuesday thing every uh, Tuesday. Let me 'splain, no there is too much. Let me sum up. Stephenie Meyer's Vampire series Twilight is now also a movie coming out in December and staring Cedric Diggory (aka RPATZZ). MTV is making the movie and this blog every Tuesday is part of their marketing strategy.

Today's post is about three sophomore girls from Texas who formed "The Bella Cullens." Larry, the blog writer, falls all over their jailbait asses:

"I had seen their MySpace page and heard some of their songs, but I was honestly amazed by how pretty their voices and melodies are, and with lyrics like “Edward’s so hot he can set the house on fire/he’s a sexy vampire,” these teens already have more talent than all the Pussycat Dolls put together."

1. Those are good lyrics? WOT?
2. More talent than the who now? Doesn't slime mold have more talent?
3. The band's name abbreviated is BCP. But remember only condoms help prevent STDs.


Most comments are some variation on "Larry, you fail" or "I <3 LARRY!":

Edward Cullen Says:
July 8th, 2008 at 9:50 am

My Sparkly Peen sings better, even when it drools for muh Bella.

But Janet comes to Larry's rescue:

Janet Says:
July 8th, 2008 at 10:02 am

Yikes people are being harsh. :) He has a lot of weeks to fill before december and I’m sure summit wouldn’t let him give us big stuff like clips every week and remember these are a gift. I’ve never seen people do something like this before to promote a movie…weekly updates I mean. Larry, I really thought it was the trailer this week and now I feel silly.

Under the cut I C&P for your pleasure.

( It goes back and forth between the Twimoms and the Twatlighters and the haters. )

ETA: LARRY SPEAKS!:( Read more... )

ETA w/XTRA SPARKLES: http://www.thebellacullenproject.com (warning: music embedded in site) is getting spammed on the comment pages by people claiming to be from ontd_twatlight. Twatlighters are saying it is not them. (Sorry can't like to comment pages directly.)


cleolinda convinced me to add the BONUS EW COVER FROM HELL!!!1:
http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/
21 pages of OMGWTFBBQ at ontd

ETA part 9.546382023: MTV blog has posted the EW photo. There may be more comments to come though currently it is at 0. Larry wants to know what people think! *CACKLE*

Dearest, beloved, Fandom Wank.

I know you were looking forward to great excitement today. Some of you said words to me that indicated you anticipated fiery 'judgement' upon those who remained fresh and dewey white, those you call n00bs.

Anyway, you got today instead.

Stop anticipating things, we'll just break your hearts.

Sincerely,

Sepia P. Magpie, Esq.



PS: Use this post to reflect on how you could be better people. Or just fuck around in the comments.

ETA: Report has been edited to reflect Anons who claim they're Velocity's friends and responsible for the edits to the wiki, not Velocity. So, consider Velocity cleared. But I'm not about to go figure out which anon friend is responsible for which edit.

Thanks to the lol_meme and wank_report for the tip.

Michela Ecks/Laura runs the wiki FanHistory.com. There's a page for CSI Fandom about the ship Grissom/Sara and there is wank there, much of it in the recent history page.

As far as I can make out (because there is a tl;dr chatlog I scanned), a bunch of CSI fans were having a chat about fandom in their regular room. Michela made negative comments about the ship's PWPs, and the rest of the fans disagreed with her. Disagreement quickly became fighting.

( Snippets of the Fight )

On April 13, Michela added a new section to the Sara/Grissom page about the chat mod: velocity bug/velocityofsound:

Velocity of Sound
Some event connected to YourTaxDollarsAtWork caused the Sara/Grissom shipper velocityofsound to remove all her fan fiction from FanFiction.Net.

velocityofsound can be a polarizing figure in the Grissom/Sara ship. If you don't like her, don't praise her and her friends fic, don't agree with her opinions, she will freeze you out. She does this on bestkeptprivate by banning people who give critical feedback, and by creating new chat rooms if chatters in the weekly chat get on her nerves. She doesn't inform people that she is doing that. They are left to figure it out. It adds to the level of cliquishness in Grissom/Sara ship.

Velocity of Sound's friends apparently retaliated almost immediately:

Velocity of Sound
Velocity of sound is a pretty damn awesome person. Despite her many efforts, a lot of fandom has gone FUBAR, and she has gotten sick of dealing with it. This leads a lot of people to call her a cold, heartless bitch, but beaneath her rough and gruff exterior, beats the heart of a true and kind shipper.

Michela reverted this edit. So, Velocity of Sound's friends re-edit, this time with her whole curriculum vitae:

( 'She has enriched the lives of many people.' )

Yes, Supernatural fandom, we have arrived!

I'm not exactly sure what's going on here, but some panties are certainly in a bunch.

So first traveller makes a filtered post (since unlocked) about fandom politics, and her distate thereof. I tried reading the whole thing, but the lack of capital letters hurt my brain, so here's the gist of it:

( On the momentous creation of a filter )

Meanwhile, ethrosdemon's ears are burning:

( 'I know all you want desperately is for me to pay attention to you. I officially am.' )

SPN wank! MY LIFE IS NOW COMPLETE.

It's an old story: HP fangirl creates sock, plagiarises (self?), denounces sock, confesses to all, and thoroughly underwhelms audience.

(from a mouse to your screens, dramione drama)

Stone the infamous slytherinjoli, er... cs_kurumi.

It was me all along! Woe. Regret.

The chorus: "I don't care!" "I care even less" "I'm not even conscious!" and further illustrated apathy.

eta: The Cult of Nice vs the Mean Girls

srslynowai bitches to BRPS about a popular player and the content of the RP in general. People immediately sniff out the vendetta, and srslynowai whines that everyone missed the point.

Who knew?

evilfirechaos is ticked. Apparently, she posted a quiz result-
http://www.livejournal.com/community/goldengirls/1414549.html

And the meanies went after her. Now she is 'OMG so mad at the other fans' and is complaining up a storm-
http://www.livejournal.com/community/goldengirls/1415532.html

It continues with this post by lifestreams-
http://www.livejournal.com/community/goldengirls/1417583.html

thepiratejoke begs for reason (silly her- there is no reason in Inter-Web Land)-
http://www.livejournal.com/community/goldengirls/1415706.html

And evilfirechaos continues the wank in her personal LJ-
http://www.livejournal.com/users/evilfirechaos/

Ahh, I never thought I'd see the day when this would happen. And here, all this time, I thought Golden Girls was about love and friendship. *snerk*

ETA: Apparently there is more to the saga! lifestreams seems to have it out for evilfirechaos. Can anyone else say 'history'?
http://www.livejournal.com/users/lifestreams/

ETA SOMETHING: ashenmote was able to save the wank for us!
http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/877746.html?thread=98491058#t98491058
Thanks!

( in case these posts get deleted )

ETA WOMBAT: This is the wank that keeps on giving... Thanks goes out to footsie for pointing this out.

evilfirechaos is reported to LJ abuse and complains about it
http://www.livejournal.com/community/god_hates_us/84418.html

And they return with their new LJ name to bitch more...
http://www.livejournal.com/community/god_hates_us/84618.html

ETA JUMP AROUND: Lifestreams had been banned from the Golden Girls LJ. Thanks bishounenhideto for pointing this out.
http://community.livejournal.com/goldengirls/1417771.html?nc=16

The now infamous Emerson Spartz of Mugglenet and Melissa Anelli of the Leaky Cauldron were at the NYC premiere of the Goblet of Fire movie. They did a podcast from there, hung out with Dan Radcliffe, and Emerson apparently called an H/Hr shipper delusional. I haven't listened to it, but the part with the shippers has been transcribed here by shallow_kid and some may find that wanky enough.

But to make things funner, phoenixwriter writes about how much she hated the podcast and others chime in/show up to tell her off.

Emerson is compared to those mean girls guys in high school, comments are made about how unmasculine his voice sounds, fans accuse each other of not having lives, and the whole delusional thing is hashed out. Again.

NM

ETA. For more premiere fallout, check out the Dan/Emma shippers at Danemma.

cheesecake_van: I swear if they don't start snogging and stop denying their relationship soon, I'm gonna go find them and lock them in a room together??? I dunno, but something...yea. Heck, why not, I'm going to england on friday.

"I'm not one of the popular kids! WAAAAAAAH!"

To which the "popular kids" go, "Uh, what?"

Mild, really, but they can't all be on the glorious HP-wank level.

...Because they all must have The One Phallus. At least until it's "Bobbit-ed" & tossed into the lake of fire, that is.


*wipes tears from eyes* It's just so BEAUTIFUL!

In the above (how did it take this long for them to find out? Wow.) Yuki Onna informs the readers that the entire site is satire and tells her minions "not to start a war." Meaning to not comment on f_w.

Then she feels the need to explain this to us. On f_w.

At least she realized she was incorrect and changed the Wasteland to The Waste Land on the user info page. "Thanks, Fandom Wank!" :D

I know someone already mentioned this, but gah. I gagged. I can't decide whether this girl is just incredibly pretentious and thinks she is God's gift to linguists, or is simply ignorant of how right-leaning Ayn Rand is and can't bother to admit what college she attends.

ADDED BONUS! After synanimus writes some godawful poetry because he wants to be able to read his own work, he bows out of lj-ing for good. We hope, but it's too soon to tell.

Ahhh. I do so love my wank tepid and splurting.

Brought to you by Ms. "I am a lit grad student, therefore my opinions are fact and your puny opinions must bow before them" of yesterday's HP/metaquotes wank:

ElitistAsshat

The community info:

We are the elite best of the best. We went to the Universities you wish you had gone to, we read the books you pretend to have read, we bedded the beautiful people who didn't know you existed. We are the ones you call pretentious elitists, and this is where we lay it all out on the table, every conceit and literosexual fetish, every obscure linguistic profanity and outrageous claim to intellectual fame. We know Latin plurals and understood The Wasteland. We deconstructed Harry Potter and then burned him in effigy in Central Park during our bi-annual bacchanal.

We are everything that threatens your mind in the suburban night. We are the Great and Marvelous Succubi--you hate us, but you still want us to touch you in all the naughtiest places. We are smarter than you, stronger than you, and prettier than you. We are the avant-garde, we are the eaters of souls.

Hate us and we will only grow stronger.

*sighs happily* And the posts are even better.

This wouldn't be anywhere near as funny if the community founder hadn't spent the day proving she actually believes much of this...