Dearest, beloved, Fandom Wank.

I know you were looking forward to great excitement today. Some of you said words to me that indicated you anticipated fiery 'judgement' upon those who remained fresh and dewey white, those you call n00bs.

Anyway, you got today instead.

Stop anticipating things, we'll just break your hearts.

Sincerely,

Sepia P. Magpie, Esq.



PS: Use this post to reflect on how you could be better people. Or just fuck around in the comments.

I've had it.

I've had it, since the GA still refuse to let me back in because I'm viewed by them as some sort of inhuman freak who does not know anything about normal human behaviour, I have decided to no longer try to make freinds anymore in both real life and on the internet

Why bother trying to make friends anymore, since last year everyone on the Anime On DVD forums hates me, the people on the VAA hate me, the GA hates me, just about everyone in real life and in the internet hates me. And since it seems I am incapable of making long term friends, why should I bother continuing to do so.

So from now on, don't bother trying to talk to me, or even try to convince me I'm making a mistake here. Trust me, this is for the best for me.

After all, aren't I an inhuman freak to all of you?

Cue... much funneh and snark and hair-tearing frustration from commentators, much whining from GrantM. 102 comments and counting.

ETA: Annnd bahleeted. But no fear, I've salvaged a few scraps (changed host to something else because Geocities sucks ass):

The whole page
Uppermost thread
Show him some courtesy, will ya?
Waah
No, dear, you won't be a VA, ever
Pity party!

ETA the second: Grant boy just deleted his LJ. Again. Is this... the third or fourth time?

I've gacked this report word for word from an anonymouse on wank_report.

"You all remember Grant M. the wannabe voice actor who scored a Fandom Wank trifecta last fall for being an absolutely clueless dumbfuck? Well, he's back, and he's bad. Or worse.

He starts out with the usual "I hate myself and I want to die" List of Self-Loathing in late January Here.

Other topics include: "My fake accent isn't fake!", "Why won't Glasgow Anime/Anime on DVD/other places I've been banned from shower unconditional love and acceptance on me?" and the ever-popular, "I need to be an anime voice actor RIGHT FUCKING NOW." Responses range from general encouragement to outright disgust.

And now, LiveJournal isn't dramatastic enough for him, so I've joined MySpace......the emo/poser haven on the internet

Good for you, Grant. Good for you."

Grantm, the wannabe VA from last time, starts a new journal. Two of them [grantm1 and gmvox), one of which was him impersonating an ADV voice actor employee. It's been deleted, but I'm taking bets he'll bring it back.

In his new journal, he whines about not having as many LJ friends as other people, and he wants to know why he ignores advice. He also wants as many industry contacts as possible even though he's never taken acting classes. He also manages to get himself banned from a Pro VA's LJ too. Cue the angst.

Oh, and he makes a wangsty post about never being a VA, or having sex. Watch as the comments explode. Bonus points include for Grantm arguing that he has talent.

Because of course he has to have talent, it's just still undiscovered!

Well, if VAing doesn't pan out, he'll just be an ADR director!. This entire LJ is wanky, so there's more wank to be had outside of these links.

If people hadn't met this guy in real life and found him to be even worse offline, I'd have thought this guy a troll. Sadly, he isn't.

My brain is melting out my ears.

[EDIT] Why, will Grantm TRULY quit obsessing about VAing? He claims he is quitting (really!), but the thread dissolves into more of a pity-fest for himself than anything else: choice quote from this is

Speaking of David Williams....I guess I should apologise to him.....correct that him and everyone else at ADV for the whole gmvox blog thing. I'm sure he's pissed at me for doing that

I should point out if ADV were to ever offer me a chance to be in anime dub if ever, I would take it up in an instant. Even though I've given up voice acting if they were to give me a chance, I would do it, no questions aksed. But we all know that's never going to happen

Remember GrantM, soon to be professional voice-actor for ADV and Funimation, the 20 yr+ who doesn't want to be famous, but wants to work on 'fan favorite' anime and get recognition from the internet anime community? Well, he hasn't stopped wanking. His LJ's deleted once again. I'm taking bets for Internet dollars that he'll bring it back anyway.

GrantM has ended up on Wikipedia (temporarily) and Encyclopedia Dramatica, and most likely UrbanDictionary. I suppose it's some form of popularity, but I doubt it's the kind he wanted.

However, Grant continues to hop from forum to forum, asking the same questions, ignoring all advice, and pissing off forum regulars. His most recent outings? Why, the Newgrounds forum of course, because how better to get Internet Popularity [TM] and recognition from Funimation and ADV than voice-acting for a Flash Movie?

Grant submits his voice-acting samples to get into the Voice Acting club on Newgrounds. He ends up being rejected, with the same advice that the AOD, the VAA, and the Toonzone people gave him, and some confused but polite boggling at his reasons at wanting to be a VA.

Grant also asks 'I've just got one small request here (although none of you will probably listen to them, I'm not surprised). Please stop talking about what pro work you've done or going to do, it makes me feel inferior, in fact that's what got me worked up when I was on the VAA'. Of course, this doesn't go over very well with the Newgrounds VA group.

He also wonders [different board] whether Asperger's would affect his voice-acting or chances of being hired. Grant's self-diagnosed.

Bonus thread. Grant thinks he may have an ego problem - you do know he wants to be a VA for ADV or Funimation, right?

I can't keep up with this guy. He's all over the place.

[edit: one anon had this to say 'I swear, he's like the kid who keeps slapping himself and going "WHY AM I HITTING MYSELF STOP IT!111"'

I couldn't have put it better myself.]

Meet GrantM. He's your typical otaku - college age or so, collects anime...and aspires to be a voice-actor. For two specific dub companies.

The problem is that he doesn't want to get any acting training (only "voice-acting training"), and he wants to go all the way from Scotland to the US. He doesn't need advice, and he doesn't need to actually contact the companies, because they will read his LJ, of course! He also doesn't believe in starting small: he deserves lead roles from the start!

Because if a girl (with acting training, for starters) his age can do it (20-23 range), he can do it!

Watch in amazement at how he doesn't actually do any research, or boggle at his reasons for wanting to be a VA:

( Read more... )

Actually, almost every post in his entire Livejournal is wanky in itself (as passing anons try to give advice to this otaku with little success) - there's way too much to go on this one post.

Edit: The mean internet people are making fun of me, what will ADV think?!. Anyone know of this thread on the AnimeonDVD forums that he mentions?

Edit 2: Bonus includes him daydreaming about his triumphant arrival as a VA at Anime Expo.

Edit 3: I hear people are getting to go to dub studios and are getting work. What are they doing that I'm not?!. Well, I don't know, maybe taking the initiative and getting away from that keyboard?

Edit 4: A voice actress gets a role in an anime. He proceeds to whine about it in the same thread.

Edit 5: More Grant in the forums, spouting the same stuff to a different crowd. "There's something about that automatic assumption from GrantM that he is going to be working for ADV and/or Funimation that I find quixotically puzzling and tragically amusing." . And "The REAL reason I want to be a VA" thread.