Thursday, November 19th, 2009

Harlequin vanity bodice-ripping wank! (Even more awesome than it sounds)

[info]jkefka
Hang on to your hats, kids, this one's a doozy in several parts. To start off, you might want to catch up on [info]agilebrit's clairvoyantwank writeup. Clairvoyant indeed! To sum up, romance publisher Harlequin Enterprises teamed up with a publisher called ASI solutions to form Harlequin Horizons, a vanity press. Romance Writers of America promptly revoked Harlequin's "recognized publisher" status.

And now for a wank in several parts, involving a goodly number of awesome people in addition to a wanking Cast of Thousands (tm):

Part 1: PubRants )

Part deux: various forums )

Part Three: SBTB, and Nora Fucking Roberts )

Part the last: The NEW YORKER?! )

And finally, THIS JUST IN from PubRants. Watch that post for further fappery developments! Notably, Harlequin has decided to dissociate the "Harlequin" name from their vanity publishing rig in response to the RWA slamming them, and the MWA has weighed in. ETA: And the wank has matured nicely! Here's a couple comments of note: Anon #1, Anon #2, "Harlequin, were not stupid" [sic].

And here come the ETAS!
#1: SFWA tweets a heads-up, and the glorious katamari of wank rolls on!

#2: Coutesy of [info]magnolia_mama, Lee Goldberg drops his two cents from the MWA soapbox. In a shocking turn of events, he seems to be making a cogent, reasonable argument. My world is rocked.

#3: [info]annathepiper links us to SFWA's statement, which is possibly the strongest yet! For a snippet:

...Further, SFWA believes that work published with Harlequin Horizons may injure writing careers by associating authors’ names with small sales levels reflected by the imprint’s lack of distribution, as well as its emphasis upon income received from writers and not readers....Until such time as Harlequin changes course, and returns to a model of legitimately working with authors instead of charging authors for publishing services, SFWA has no choice but to be absolutely clear that NO titles from ANY Harlequin imprint will be counted as qualifying for membership in SFWA. Further, Harlequin should be on notice that while the rules of our annual Nebula Award do not expressly prohibit self-published titles from winning, it is highly unlikely that our membership would ever nominate or vote for a work that was published in this manner....SFWA does not believe that changing the name of the imprint, or in some other way attempting to disguise the relationship to Harlequin, changes the intention, and calls on Harlequin to do the right thing by immediately discontinuing this imprint and returning to doing business as an advance and royalty paying publisher.

Count on the pew-pew lasers genre to bring the burn!

#4: Found by [info]pariforma, someone named Jackie Kessler has an excellent (and amusing) summary of the whole mess on their blog. The pricing breakdown (with reference links to the Harlequin price-sheets themselves) is particularly well-done.

#5, which should be like #3 but I missed it the first time: via [info]lady_ganesh, Mr. Scalzi has spoken. Does anyone else smell something...burning?

Too Hot (and big) For Your Flist )

Mmm, PR barbecue. As a bonus, there's a lovely herd of teal deer in the comments, including some truly lovely wanking by one Diana Peterfreund and a few others. Scroll on through, it's a good time.

Blooper reel: We, uh, may have played a part in crashing SBTB for a while there. please don't kill meeeee

#6: Zoe Winters continues her wanking in the comments of an article at the Examiner. Thanks [info]dreamworld!
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Monday, June 23rd, 2008

Fail mods are failing

[info]sepiamagpie
Dearest, beloved, Fandom Wank.

I know you were looking forward to great excitement today. Some of you said words to me that indicated you anticipated fiery 'judgement' upon those who remained fresh and dewey white, those you call n00bs.

Anyway, you got today instead.

Stop anticipating things, we'll just break your hearts.


Sincerely,

Sepia P. Magpie, Esq.



PS: Use this post to reflect on how you could be better people. Or just fuck around in the comments.
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Thursday, December 20th, 2007

Lee Goldblerg + OTW = Love. I mean wank.

[info]mydruthers
Lee Goldberg has discovered OTW. Hijinks ensue.

If his post about the staggering hypocrisy of fanfic writers isn't lol-worthy enough, check out the comments for more comedy gold:

"For months I've tried to puzzle my way toward an understanding of fanficcers. How can it be that the same people who would be outraged if a mugger ran off with everything in their wallets are not outraged when they themselves mug the intellectual property of others?"

Fanfiction, it's like stealing little old ladies' purses in a way.

"...[F]an fiction is usually devoid of character description, including each character's idiosyncrasies and each character's unique way of talking and dealing with others, because its writers assume that fanfic readers already know the characters. In typical fan fiction there is not even a physical description of the characters. That means that the work is incomplete and cannot stand on its own, and therefore it has limited artistic merit. Material that damages the author's characters, as fanfic does, is harmful. The harm I am talking of here has nothing to do with copyright, but with the aesthetics of the story and the characters. Or are you saying that the fan fiction version is on an aesthetic plane with the author's work even though the fan fiction version cannot even stand on its own? I hope you won't embarrass yourself with an argument like that. Go ahead, Mr. Rommel, kill the host and see if your parasites survive for long."

Fanfiction, it's like facehuggers in a way.

Oh Lee, why can't you be more like your brother?
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Saturday, February 17th, 2007

Lee Goldberg: I Didn't Do It For the Money!

[info]dreamer_marie
Over at Reason Magazine, Cathy Young has written an article about fan fiction in which she talks about the usual things, Shakespeare, the Internet, etc... and Lee Goldberg. Namely, that he only wrote that Monk tie-in for the money:


The vehemently anti-fanfic writer Lee Goldberg, who blogs at leegoldberg.com, is the author of several authorized novels based on the TV shows Monk and  Diagnosis Murdera contradiction he defends on the grounds that he does it only for the money.


Lee was apparently on vacation, far away from Google, which is why it took him a while to respond:

She has no journalistic integrity! So there! )

Young posts an answer to Goldberg and still misses the point:


You totally DID do it for the money! And you use too many italics! So there! )


Lee is not pleased and his cooler brother Tod steps in to defend him, calling everybody "fucktards" and making fun of Young's Xena fanfic:


Yeah, well, people who write sucky fic should not be allowed to make fun of my brother! )

I'll be in the corner, curled in fetal position, muttering about adult behaviour.

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Saturday, September 2nd, 2006

Wank convergence, courtesy of our pal Lee.

[info]perletwo
Found this via a mousey tip on wank_report. First time posting, be gentle plz. It's not really a wanky entry per se - only 10 comments - but it so perfectly merges a couple of recent wank themes I just had to bring it to y'all's attention.

Our old pal Lee Goldberg of the recent fanfic be EEEVIL wank, has found out about The Harlan Ellison Worldcon Gropage Incident and felt compelled to weigh in on it with a blog posting, which includes dishy anecdotes about what a douchebag Harlan is, not only in general, but to Our Man Lee specifically. It's hard to know who to root for here, folks.

Only 10 comments at Lee's blog - remember, good wankas don't - but they're cherce, complete with amens ("Harlan Ellison has always thought it witty to exhibit a streak of casual cruelty toward others, even his friends"), HE apologia ("He and Connie were doing an act, and Harlan took it too far"), Taking It Personally ("Even if she didn't mind it, I and other women do"), rambling discursions on vintage radio shows ("Somewhere I think I may still have a tape of that broadcast"), and oh yes, a post busting Lee's chops for misstating basic factual information in his post ("Lee, just a quick correction...").

Oh, and Lee references having seen one of the famous HE writing in a bookstore window incidents, but seems to have no idea of what he was doing there (creating a short story from scratch off an audience suggestion), or that he is in fact famous for it. Dweeb.
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Monday, August 21st, 2006

I love Lee Goldberg wank like I love taffy

[info]gun
What a treat, boys and girls. HP slash wank + Lee Goldberg = PROFITS. Taken from [info]wank_report: thanks to the lovely mousie who pointed it out. Muchos cheese to you.

Ahem. So, anyway, Lee decides to address his favourite topic in the world: FAN FIC AUTHORS ARE NAUGHTY CHILDREN, AND THAT'S CONCENTRATED EVIL COMING OUT THE BACK OF THEM. All goes well until a very clever young fic writer decides to pop up to share his side of the story, quoting Wikipedia as an irrefutable source:

I write fanfiction and will always do so.
I think bryley's wright Fanfiction is writen by fans for fans. So if you don't like it stay away from our communites and off our sites.

Many complain about Fanfiction.nst Adult fanficton and say it noting rape fic's and stories on chan. Why are you even looking? I write slash and I state up front I do not own said book or movie. And make no money off them.

My writings are pure fantasy are for other fanfiction lovers not for people like you!Fandom is too large to be push back or held down!


Yeah, kiddo, you stick it to the man there. So there's speculation following this about his questionable writing skills and intelligence until young Kyle decides to return with a link to his own Snarry fic, because clearly he's either really fucking dumb or masochistic.

Frankly, I don't know which side to barrack for. Maybe the comet. I love comet.
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Tuesday, November 1st, 2005

And they just keep going

[info]morgothik
Well, there they go again….

Over at Fanthropology the skolerz of phandum are at it again. This time one PurplePopple queries how one can teach 14 years olds to write OMG Teh Speshul Slash Pr0n. Obvious hand-brain disconnect there. Hand, meet Brain. Learn to work in tandem. It's good for everyone.


But too late since Skrike , seemingly a part of the Triple Sooper Sekret Anti-Fic Cabal jumps all over this one like a dog on a pork chop. The minions all chime in and it’s one grand Kumbayah of outrage . Small, tidy, neatly contained bit of outraged piety, until.

Everybody’s favorite writer Lee Goldberg ! Picks up the trail, thereby treating us to another bit’o’splooge and the renewal of what seems to be his very personal mano-a-mano vendetta-rama with one of the skolerz.

Sorry but this wank deserved to happen. Methinks Remedial STFU 101 is in order at the top of this wank chain. Please stop feeding the innocent plebes out there!

Update...Bahleetion

yadda yadda TL:DR here )


. Nicely spliced for your convenience..just the good bits...not the Strunk and White...
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