This is a two-parter. Choose your favourite half.

This all starts over on Fandom Lounge (sort of!), where it is revealed that author, Casea Major first made a novel based off 50 shades and just as we found out about this joy she removed all traces of it from the internet.

Why did she do it? Well, it may have something to do with how EL James (author of 50 Shades) recently cease and desisted someone's lingerie parties that were themed after her books.

Actual quote: EL James’ agent Valerie Hoskins said the legal letter was not personal, adding: “You can’t just hijack something someone else owns.”

Now we enter into the next phase!

Cleolinda tweets about it, because that's what Cleo does.

Enter: AJA

See, lately Aja's blogger for the Daily Dot.

Anyway, she decides to write an article and tweets Cleo about the article:



Cleo does not respond.

So Aja tweets again:



Wait, what's Cleo talking about? What official account? WELL. Included on Aja's post, was this screencap:



Sounds hilarious, right? It's a photoshop though. If only because if it HAD happened Cleo would have it bronzed on her wall. But that's okay, because Aja wouldn't claim a photoshop was rea--oh, she did. Because that's how you Journalism in Aja land.

I'm not being unkind, she actually admits it:

Okay, she admits it AFTER Cleo keeps asking her about it (read these bottom up):





If the image isn't working, she says this about how she factchecks: "you know i was afraid of that, i tried to find it yesterday too & didn't confirm before we went to press. should have asked you!"

As of this post, Aja has kept a link to the photoshop in case she can magically verify it.

Sex scenes can be really funny. Badly-written sex scenes can be absolutely hilarious. Since there are a lot of badly-written sex scenes in the world, the denizens of LJ's weepingcock take it upon themselves to select the best of the worst and laugh uproariously at it. Or cringe. Or possibly laugh uproariously in a cringing fashion. It depends on the excerpt.

Anyhow, pirsquar posts this amazing excerpt, for the enjoyment of the entire community.

( My ovaries are incandescing at the thought of this quote. )

The reaction is a standard mix of 'lol', 'wtf', and 'OW'...

...at least, until Loyal Defender Of The Literary Mighty deborahkla charges in to express her displeasure with the mere posting of this blurb.

Why?

Because it was written by Henry Miller.

Apparently, if you are a Noted Figure Of Literature, you are incapable of writing bad porn, regardless of what our eyes might be telling us. She makes sure to inform us of this. She even did it twice, in the exact same wording.

( Her learnings, let her show us them. )

Despite the condescending tone, the weepingcock natives are actually quite reasonable in pointing out that funny sex is not discriminating, and 'great authors' are not immune to mockery if they write and publish something weepingcock-worthy. For deborahkla, however, 'reasonable disagreement' translates into 'OMFG EVERYONE'S ATTACKING ME'. So she attacks back...despite not being attacked in the first place. (She has mastered the use of the c&p comment, for sure -- there are several in there that she copies verbatim into multiple threads.)

She also flounces out of the community.

The only problem there is that she keeps right on posting answers to comments, actively telling people that 'she's out of the community now'. Her logic flaw is pointed out to her numerous times.

She reacts, naturally, by doing the most reasonable, mature thing possible.

She messages the mods.

( Mods, they're being meeeeeeean to meeeee! )

I don't know about all of you, but I definitely feel my ovaries incandescing right now.

In Soviet Russia you hunt Fox, in Fascist America Fox hunt YOU!

--Wikipedia IRC channel comment.

Well, Wankas, it's time to wrap up this sorry mess. When last we left this probably-on-the-wrong-community-(oops!)-but-oh-so-wanky story - may as well finish it here, right? - Jimbo Wales had gone on a rampage deleting 19th-century art, and anything he thought was pornographic. There's a lot of wank, so I'm going to select some of the best juicy tidbits, and the rest can mainly be found on The foundation-l mailing list archive and the archive of Jimbo's talk page.

So, we begin with the big reveal: after edit warring to keep the images deleted, he finally stated why: Fox News was about to attack Wikipedia:

On the "Foundation-l" mailing list:

Much of the cleanup is done, although there was so much hardcore
pornography on commons that there's still some left in nooks and crannies.

I'm taking the day off from deleting, both today and tomorrow, but I do
encourage people to continue deleting the most extreme stuff.

But as the immediate crisis has passed (successfully!) there is not
nearly the time pressure that there was. I'm shifting into a slower mode.

We were about to be smeared in all media as hosting hardcore pornography
and doing nothing about it. Now, the correct storyline is that we are
cleaning up. I'm proud to have made sure that storyline broke the way
it did, and I'm sorry I had to step on some toes to make it happen.

Now, the key is: let's continue to move forward with a responsible
policy discussion.

( Juicy details, but a little long for on the front page )
Jimbo on what he chose to delete

...I deleted some things that I assumed would be undeleted after a
discussion. I wanted us to take an approach that involved first
deleting a lot of borderline things, and then bringing them back after
careful case by case discussions.

That proved to be quite unpopular, and I'm sorry about it.

and

I had thought that a good process would be to engage in a very strong series of deletions, including of some historical images, and then to have a careful discussion about rebuilding. That proved to be very unpopular and so I regret it. It also may have had the effect of confusing people about my own position on what to keep and what to get rid of.

However, that didn't mean he actually wanted things to be discussed now:

I have redeleted the image for the duration of the cleanup project. We will have a solid discussion about whether Commons should ever host pornography and under what circumstances at a later day - June 1st will be a fine time to start.--Jimbo Wales (talk) 17:31, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

But, hey, Wales is Wikipedia's Godking. He'll come out of this fine, right? Sure, there's a petition for his powers to be removed, but it'll never happen, right?

Jimbo Wales, May 9th

In the interest of encouraging this discussion to be about real
philosophical/content issues, rather than be about me and how quickly I
acted, I've just now removed virtually all permissions to actually do
things from the "Founder" flag. I even removed my ability to edit
semi-protected pages! (I've kept permissions related to 'viewing' things.)

I do not want to be a tyrant or dictator. I do not want us to fight
about that kind of thing, as it's really a distraction from our work.

What I'm interested in is this video:
http://www.vimeo.com/8709616

Please watch it - it's 8 minutes long, and well worth it. This video
moved me deeply - it shows what our real impact on the world is, and I
think if you watch it, you'll feel the way that I did.

That's right, wankas, Jimbo Wales had to give up practically all his administrative powers over this.

Results

But, hey, the crisis was averted by Jimbo's actions, right? He said so several times:

"There was a crisis situation and I took action which ended up averting the crisis..."

"...as the immediate crisis has passed (successfully!) [...] Now, the correct storyline is that we are
cleaning up. I'm proud to have made sure that storyline broke the way
it did..."

And so on! So, surely Fox News was happy that Jimbo made sure that they got what they wanted?

Despite Content Purge, Pornographic Images Remain on Wikimedia

By Jana Winter - FOXNews.com
( Quotes from the report )

...Nope. Didn't help at all. (I should point out that Fox's report bears little relation to reality - the number of images deleted has been enumerated, and was about 400, not the thousands they claim, and note they don't mention they're talking about 19th-century and early-20th-century artworks until around the third page - but, then, if you know FoxNews, would you be surprised?)

----
ETA 1: How badly did Jimbo mess up? Even after he voluntarily gave up his administrative rights, people were complaining he didn't give up enough, because he might be able to take them back in future. Laaknor and and Avi "helped" Jimbo by fixing this loophole and a bug fix has been stepped up in priority because one of the view-only rights he kept so he could do his job had some administrative rights attached. [Other posts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8]

ETA 2: Fox News mentions one image in their article as being particularly horrible. They give enough description that I was able to find it. It's this French cartoon from the early 20th century. Judge for yourselves whether it's worth the conniptions they have over it. And, yes, they're by an artist who's famous for his decadent illustrations of this type - but how dare Wikipedia include famous French artist!

Also, for those interested, here's one of the images Jimbo deleted personally, and wanted to delay discussion of restoring the file for a month.

ETA 3: Oh my god: It all makes sense: Jimbo was trying to completely purge Commons of anything the least bit controversial to kill the story, figuring it could be brought back in a couple months! Consider:

( Evidence )
...He wanted to get Commons completely purged while attention was on it, then - and then only - allow the restoration of encyclopedic material when attention was off it.

...I'm stunned.

( Spoilers for Torchwood and oh god great linky madness within. Enter at your own risk. )

This post brought to you by the ridiculously helpful mousies on wank_report, the letter W and the number 4. (The W is for wut and 4 is how many cups of coffee I've already had today).

Arisama is looking for writers to help him with his new roleplaying forum "Hot Wet Planet", and takes his description over to rpg.net.

( Cut for length and...well, the sort of text you'd expect from a game called Hot Wet Planet )

The whole thing seems to be degenerating into lulz for everyone but the flailing Arisama, but at this point that's about all that can be done.

UPDATE: In a far from unexpected move, Arisama compliments rpg.net for increasing his site's google ranking. However, a quick Google search determines that it is actually the rpg.net thread that is in the topmost rankings under "Hot Wet Planet"--with this post coming in fifth. Huzzah.

Dearest, beloved, Fandom Wank.

I know you were looking forward to great excitement today. Some of you said words to me that indicated you anticipated fiery 'judgement' upon those who remained fresh and dewey white, those you call n00bs.

Anyway, you got today instead.

Stop anticipating things, we'll just break your hearts.

Sincerely,

Sepia P. Magpie, Esq.



PS: Use this post to reflect on how you could be better people. Or just fuck around in the comments.

Cyndi, a popular author in the Transformers fandom, is raging mad. deviantArt just TOSsed her fanfic Ambrosia. What was the fanfic about? Primarily about Starscream and Unicron getting it on in full detail.

But it wasn't porn, according to Cyndi. Oh no. It's LITERATURE.

( I HAVE BEEN HORRIBLY WRONGED ONOES )

In conclusion? LOL BNFS

ETA: All of Cyndi's journal entries have been locked.

Alrighty, first and foremost ASSUME ALL LINKS IN THIS POST TO CONTAIN CONTENT THAT IS NSFW! . I cannot stress this enough. If I didn't think blinking red text would incite justified rage, I'd put it in that. THESE LINKS ALL HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO HAVE VERY VERY NSFW CONTENT! So I'll try and summarize it the best that I can here.

Yesterday on the Discovery Channel 'Mythbusters' message boards, a questionable image started being spammed. The image contained what was claimed to be one of the hosts, Adam Savage, doing what I'm going to politely describe as a somewhat mild Goatse impression (DON'T LOOK IT UP IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD). Naturally the threads containing said photo were quickly deleted... but of course not before plenty of folks had the chance to save the evidence.

Encyclopedia Dramatica already has a write-up, including a screenshot from the original chaos on the Discovery Channel message boards of a post from a concerned parent (copypastain' so folks won't have to click it):

"this is to whomever is posting the photos of Adam naked, my 11 year old son woke up early and hopped on the computer to come here to see what episodes are coming up (this is one of his favorite shows) and clicked a photo link (i wont post it here) but the link seems to contain naked photos of Adam Savage, he was terribly upset by these and I feel compelled to contact media sources for scarring my young boy. this WAS his favorite show, hes been crying all morning. It seems to me the names of these invaders are googleable and come back as members of www.ebaumsworld.com please look into this, and until i see an apology for this consider my family no longer viewers of Mythbusters OR ANY Discovery channel shows, if these are the kinds of perverts you put on air. thanks"

There are massive threads about it all over the web, including on Something Awful, ONTD, and Digg.com.

There's still heavy debate on if the picture is real or not, with folks pulling out their degrees in Photoshop all over the place and the blame being cast on everywhere from good 'ol Ebaumsworld to /b/. There has been no official statement from the Discovery Channel on the incident, and so far the hubbub seems to be confined to the internet. But oh, what a hubbub it is.

ETA: Added the 'concerned parent' quote from ED.

ETA 2: According to what's being said on the 'Discussion' page of the ED article, it's possible the 'concerned parent' screenshot was faked. Moreso, it's possible there never was any spamming of the Discovery Channel message boards. Making it quite an epic (and judging by the reactions around the web, successful) joke.

Or, Why Fannish Meta Can't Have Nice Things.

Over on LJ, hth_the_first makes a post about how slash and queer aren't the same thing. There's some interesting discussion, lots of personal insights and it's chugging along smoothly...until page 2.

miriam_heddy's comment includes this idea:

And while most slashers may well self-identify or live in the RW as heterosexual, in terms of behaviour, I'd argue that those same het slashers are often participating in homosexual activity.

mrs260 objects to that, inspiring this post's title, and asks for clarification. harriet_spy breaks in:

Surely you did not mean to come into the LJ of a queer person and suggest that homosexual activity is disgusting, did you?

One can disagree with the analysis without suggesting that it leads somewhere loathsome.

Turns out mrs260 is a gay man, so along with not being all over the ladies, "Besides the whole fact that I'm attracted to men, not women, I don't think it's out of line to think it's icky to see someone postulate that one has been unwittingly participating in "sexual activity" with any number of friends, acquaintances, and strangers."

And it's on. The thread grows, people continue to having Learning Experiences with harriet_spy, mrs260 clarifies, and later on, friends of his show up to support him in brand-new LJs (never a good move) and get into it with liviapenn.

Old-time BNFs. Accusations of homophobia. (Putative) sockpuppets. All that's missing is plagiarism allegations.

Remember teh_no? He's been involved in some amusing wanks in the past, including "Fandom wimmins are sexist!", "I can totally pwn Warren Ellis!" and "You didn't comment on my fanfic, you pedo bitch!"

Back in November, brown_betty posted a few theories about teh_no, sockpuppets and scans_daily. This prompted surprisingly little fall-out.

Well, teh_no did comment on monkeycrackmary's journal asking, "What did I ever do to you?", apparently working on the principle that Betty is Mary's sockpuppet. And also on the principle that Mary would have forgotten teh_no calling her a pedophile. And there was a complicated little exchange on teh_no's journal. (Note that Betty's brutal expose was posted on November 15.)

But, all in all, rather quiet. Certainly nothing that ended up on f_w, anyway.

However, on December 13, teh_no posted: "So fast, my posts at fanficrants have inspired a metaquote and icons. I can only imagine that a movie offer is next. Oh, BB, I totally forgive you for all those things you said about me. Dissecting the badfic skeletons in your closet is more than worth your harsh words."

So, what badfic skeletons are in this mysterious "BB"'s closet?

Well, there's this one, this one and this one. Allegedly.

You see, the mod of weepingcock has spotted something:

"Is it possible that you would prefer not to link to the original author because the excerpts are from an online Hustler novel (this post, in particular, comes from page 10, BTW) and not, in fact, from Batman fanfic as you've previously claimed in fanficrants?"

Oops.

koshiroryuu then decides it's only fair to expose the badfic skeletons in teh_no's closet. And, oh boy, are there a lot.

Not that it's his fault, of course. A girl made him do it.

ETA Disclaimer: I have tangled with teh_no in the past and can be seen in the comments of Betty's post. I'm not involved in the current wank.

ETA: Year One: I forgot to include some tantalising hints teh_no dropped as to the identity of 'BB'. She's somebody from "Batman fandom, sorry to say" and also somebody who fancies herself quite the feminist." Why, it's almost as if he's describing brown_betty!

ETAfall: And banninated from fanficrants.

The ETA Knight: Also banninated from weepingcock.

A new LJ community dedicated to one of the most prolific trolls I've ever met. He demands NC-17 fic through IM or email - usually, er, "odd" femslash pairings in Smallville or Buffy - and when he doesn't get them, look out!

Finally, his many victims get together to discuss the good times had.

Meet Mr. Jeremy Crawford ... the man who wants you to write p0rn for him. NOW!

(Full disclosure: This guy used to write to me regularly, years ago, demanding Lana/Martha, but I just banned him. Can't believe he's still around.)