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The sordid tale of Victoria Bitter (VB) Since there seems to be such confusion over the post by The sordid tale of VB, as told by Victoria Bitter, henceforth VB, was something of a prodigy in LOTR fandom - she wrote stories and did art and was well-regarded, if considered a bit flaky. In 2002, VB shows up at ConneXions (a slash convention) sporting a fake British accent and blue contacts. At some point during the weekend, she hooks up with The relationship drama begins: Then VB starts posting that her parents have found out about this because Relationship-wise, VB starts disappearing from IM and not answering e-mails and generally avoiding Versaphile. Finally Versaphile arranges to drive out several states away to see her; VB avoids her for a day, finally meets up, gives some story about having to get away from her parents, and they agree to try to keep the relationship going - as long as VB will be honest. Ahem. Less than a month later, VB gives Versaphile the "I'm so fucked up; you don't deserve someone as messed up as me" speech (possibly one of the only verifiably true things she's said in the whole saga) and calls things off. In which hobbits are channeled: Meanwhile, VB has been writing in her LJ about how maybe she *is* going crazy, because she's been channeling the spirit of a long-dead hobbit. And not just any hobbit - she's channeling Merriadoc Brandybuck. Under his original non-anglicized name, whatever it was. She acknowledges that the LOTR hobbits are supposed to be fictional - she doesn't understand why she's getting his dreams and his automatic writing, or "learning" his language which is, according to her, Westron. That's right: the ancient tongue of Middle Earth. A bunch of people of varying gullibility levels start following it and playing along; VB even makes an LJ for "him". One friend of Enter an important new character in the drama: Enter Orangeblossom (henceforth OB), another LOTR person who is married to a guy she's nicknamed Strider. VB and OB knew each other as co-founders of Bitofearth.net, a popular LOTR fansite heavily dedicated to Sam and Sean Astin, and also the web presence of the Bit of Earth nonprofit project. The site is now dead OB buys *way* into the hobbitwank. She was one of the ones who was trying to learn the language from VB so they could speak it together, and she possibly thought she was a reincarnation/channeler too. This becomes important because after VB plays the "I'm too screwed up for a relationship, you don't deserve my crap" card with Versaphile, she almost immediately starts dating OB. Assuming it wasn't happening on the side already. Says At some point during the madness, OB gets a divorce from Strider. From Because it wouldn't be wank without MsA: Some time later, VB plans a trip to Portland to see OB and Around this time, OB and VB start analyzing publicity photos and decide that Elijah Wood is losing weight. They conclude that he's seriously depressed and since OB has connections to Sean Astin through Bit of Earth, she mentions this to him. Then the fun begins: OB starts claiming that after that conversation, Sean Astin gave Elijah her phone number and that Elijah called her. OB and Elijah suddenly become great friends and confidantes - he flies her up to Washington at his expense to have dinner with him when he was there in a break from promotions. Says OB, "I can't tell anyone cause they wouldn't believe me!" Ahem. Then a new LiveJournal named Because of this, VB and OB are now possessors of the Truth about Elijah Wood & Dominic Monahan: Elijah and Dom are dating, but contrary to After several months of being Best Gay Friends with OB and communicating with her LJ friends via Then VB also disappears from the web, posting "Goodbye fandom, I have known thee well" in LJ and shutting up shop. Or so we thought. And now for the kiddie porn: Silence, silence, all is silence for months. Then Versaphile posts an Elijah Wood AU manip in her LJ. It's a BDSM pic where he's supposed to look "consensually ravished" but he looks rather young, and quite a few people are squicked. As is their prerogative. However, it was made from a screencap of a 14- or 15-year-old Elijah Wood (who is now well over-age) and the body of an adult (twink) model. So no matter what the fictional implications of the picture might be, no minors were harmed in the making of this movie, thank you, please drive on through. There are a bunch of comments, some serious discussion but nothing that gets too flame-y, and Versaphile actually does make some changes because she doesn't want it to look *too* young. Then she gets a post from Bunches of people point out that there is no actual child involved, so good luck with that one - but of course Versaphile is freaked, though she was dealing pretty well with it. LJ does ask her to remove the pic, and she complies. Mr. Frodo, however, is not satisfied at all. And who should show up to defend him - and overdefensively correct the mistaken assumption that Mr. Frodo was a girl? Orangeblossom. (LJ also deleted, but it used to be The gender wars: Later that day or maybe the next, someone slips the word to Versaphile that Mr. Frodo is actually VB, the ex who never entirely disappears. Ah ha, some sort of an explanation for the vehement defensiveness on the part of OB, and the level of Elijah-protecting insanity of Mr. Frodo. OB shows up again a few comments later in the original picture post to state that "SOMEBODY appears to have a bad case of Ex Girlfriend, and now everything makes sense", and she's here to set the record straight: Mr. Frodo (who is the new treasurer at Bit of Earth, having taken the place of - wait for it - VB, but that's a Complete Coincidence) IS NOT VB. Yes, VB did come out to live with OB in Oregon, but VB was depressed and some time before had committed suicide. Mr. Frodo is definitely a man (which OB can attest to having slept with him that night and been brushed by his Very Real Cock Thank You as he got out of bed that morning) and she doesn't appreciate her dead ex-girlfriend being labeled as her current and very live boyfriend. All hell breaks loose, of course. It's all over the lost Blurty version of Fandom Wank, and their supporters are either backpedaling or staunchly trying to defend them. Then someone finds a picture of "Mr. Frodo" that OB had posted in her own LJ recently, then had mysteriously deleted. Everyone promptly responds, "Hey - it's VB with a buzz cut and blue contacts." After MUCH wanking here, there, everywhere, Mr. Frodo deletes "his" LJ, having never said much about the whole thing "himself." And after several days of arguing and lying and still claiming Mr. Frodo is a man "but I can never prove it to you people - even if I scanned his driver's license you'd say it was faked", OB deletes hers as well. Man, I feel like a woman: Eventually it surfaces that Mr. Frodo/VB is now going by Jordan Wood, and living as a man on the west coast - and engaged to OB. Then it comes out that VB claims/various personages have reported that s/he's not simply FTM transgender - she's growing a miracle!penis (aka IntelliCock) and *actually* turning into a man. And that man...is Elijah Wood. She's channeling his spirit, even though he's still alive, and this has been going on since the We learn that VB's family back in Virginia are searching for her when her face turns up on the side of a milk carton. Fandom folks report that VB (Amy Player) and OB (Abigail "Abby" Stone) have now moved from Oregon to California and are living in Los Angeles with one of their The Bit of Earth scandal breaks: Shortly thereafter, it comes to light that VB and OB have been pocketing a lot of the cash donated to the Bit of Earth charity, especially that donated for TentMoot. It's been cataloged quite thoroughly by Then VB is busted in Oregon for identity theft. Says At last, we can retire and give up this life of crime: In June of 2004, Nearly two years later, VB resurfaces, this time using the LJ Feel free to jump in and add details! New info will be added to the main entry as needed. ETA: Broken links removed and LJ links updated to use subdomains. Post a comment in response: |
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