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June 30th, 2008


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puipui
02:00 am - Monthly Picspam: Star Trek Captains!
The results of our very first monthly picspam poll are in, and for the subject of our very first monthly picspam, you've chosen... Star Trek Captains!

And so, without further ado...




This is Captain James Tiberius Kirk, as played by the one, the only, William Fucking Shatner. Yes, that is absolutely his real middle name.
















Captain Kirk was a bit of a slut, and totally had a thing going on with his first mate (FIRST MATE IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE! HA!) Spock.






Spock was probably promoted to captain at some point during the movies, so this picture of him playing chess while his other lover Bones (BONES IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE! HA AGAIN!) studies his every move is completely in keeping with the theme of this post.




Of course, Captain Kirk was also doin' it with Uhura, and was therefore the envy of every man, woman, otherwise or undecided in the entirety of Starfleet.






Uhura was never promoted to captain during the movies, but you try telling her that Nichelle Nichols doesn't qualify for this post. SHE WILL CUT A BITCH.








Uhura also had a thing on the side with Mr. Sulu, who is made of WIN AND LOVE AND AWESOME.








Sulu was captain of the Excelsior. THEREFORE GEORGE TAKEI TOTALLY COUNTS OMG!










Wait, Masi Oka? How did he get in here? Whatever, while I'm here, I might as well post one of Zachary Quinto, as he'll be playing Spock in the reboot and we've already established that Spock counts and also Fishie might kill me if I don't.




And here is a picture of Karl Urban, who will be playing Bones in the reboot, because Bree might kill me if I don't.




And speaking of pictures that Fishie will like (which we were doing just a minute ago, I swear), here is Scott Bakula, who played Captain Whatshisname on that one Star Trek show that I never actually watched because I heard it kinda sucked. Whatever, though, he is completely hot.










Patrick Stewart is also hot.










As is Avery Brooks.










Captain Kirk would totally tap that if he could.




I may have gotten slightly carried away with the Kate Mulgrew pics, perhaps. Although, to be honest, I don't think that's actually possible.
















This is Jeffrey Hunter, who played Captain Pike in the original Star Trek pilot episode back in the sixties.






I mention him because A) he's a Star Trek Captain, B) he's hot, and C) I've just discovered today that the reboot version of Captain Pike will be played by Bruce Greenwood, whom (if you're anything like me) you may remember from the incredibly brilliant but sadly short-lived Nowhere Man, mainly because he is mad hot yo.








OH LOOK IT'S BRUCE GREENWOOD PLAYING CHESS!




The reboot version of Scotty, BTW, will be played by Simon Pegg. Scotty was made captain of the USS Mumblemumble in Star Trek Roman Numeral: The Search for More Cash, which means that these pictures of Simon Pegg have a totally valid reason for being here that has nothing at all to do with me having a bit of a thing for him, I swear.








It's just occurred to me that this reboot thing, however much it sucks, is likely to suck a whole lot of money out of your comm maintainers when it comes out. So here's Zachary Quinto, Karl Urban and Simon Pegg again, just for the hell of it, with some extra added Nick Frost thrown in, because THEY CANNOT BE SEPARATED OMG. I'm going to pretend that Nick Frost plays an off-screen assistant engineer having a torrid love affair with Scotty who eventually gets promoted to captain through a series of wacky misunderstandings and misadventures, so there.








And, of course, Reboot!Kirk will be played by Chris Pine. Here's hoping he doesn't suck too much! We shall see.







And that's your June Picspam, kids! Hope you liked it, and be on the lookout for a new picspam poll tomorrow. Ooooh, aaaah.

(Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:[info]eleutheria
Date:June 30th, 2008 10:39 am (UTC)
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William Shatner is actually attractive in a couple of those. Which horrifies me even more than seeing a hot woman on VH1 once and realizing it was Paris Hilton.

Holy hell, Uhura is HOT! Especially in that long-hair pic!
[User Picture]
From:[info]kadath
Date:June 30th, 2008 03:52 pm (UTC)
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It's actually a bit scary how cute he is when his mouth is shut, innit?
[User Picture]
From:[info]alya1989262
Date:June 30th, 2008 10:54 am (UTC)
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What... is that third picture of Stewart? o.O

Also, I am totally seconding the Simon Pegg bias!

And Chris Pine is cute.
[User Picture]
From:[info]puipui
Date:June 30th, 2008 11:10 am (UTC)
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What... is that third picture of Stewart?

He's playing Oberon in a stage production of A Midsummer Night's Dream. Apparently this involves having bizarre hair and no pants and really very impressively well-muscled legs, who knew?

Also, I am totally seconding the Simon Pegg bias!

YAY! ♥
[User Picture]
From:[info]tehrin
Date:June 30th, 2008 11:00 am (UTC)
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Can't talk. Overloaded with the hotness.

I'LL BE IN MY BUNK (ON THE ENTERPRISE).

(More Masi Plz!)
[User Picture]
From:[info]puipui
Date:June 30th, 2008 11:12 am (UTC)
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(More Masi Plz!)

Already working on it! :D
[User Picture]
From:[info]breecita
Date:June 30th, 2008 11:53 am (UTC)
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<3 Karl Urban is love. This makes up for him not winning the poll.

Though he's GOING TO in July, right, everyone?
From:[info]witty
Date:June 30th, 2008 01:02 pm (UTC)
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Looking at the reboot, I'm like, Fandom Actor Bingo, Fandom Actor Bingo, Fandom Actor Bingo, and then.... somebody I've never heard of as Captain Kirk. Which is a pity. Also, I'm not sure Captain Kirk ever starred on WB as a sulky highschool student.

(If that actor never did, he should have.)

That said, Jeffery Hunter FTW! I was reading up on him a while ago, and it turns out he was the nicest nice who ever niced. He died young, of complications from a head injury, or else more people than trekkers might know his name.

Also, let the record show that being a Shakespearean actor means that someday there will be photographs of you in a loincloth. Not that that's a problem.
[User Picture]
From:[info]notjo
Date:June 30th, 2008 01:12 pm (UTC)
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OMG I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER THERE ARE HOT CELEBS PLAYING CHESS I AM TOTALLY SETTING UP A NEW BACKGROUND ON MY WORK COMPUTER AS SOON AS I AM DOING WRITING THIS MY GOD I AM DEAD OF happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

And god Nichelle Nicoles is hawt. Hello, nurse Communications Officer!

And Patrick Stewart and Avery Brooks and KATE MULGREW OMG KATE I LOVE YOU!!! TESLA!!!!!! (sorry, wrong reference)

<3 <3 <3 <3!!! I have NEVER loved ANYTHING as much as THIS! <3

[User Picture]
From:[info]llama_treats
Date:June 30th, 2008 01:14 pm (UTC)
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I'm so happy right now. (Well, except about the reboot which, no matter who's in it, will suck. Sorry JJ Abrams, but no.)
[User Picture]
From:[info]damnedfallacy
Date:June 30th, 2008 03:01 pm (UTC)
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This is the best post the Internet has ever seen. You win everything ever, which I will provide to you as soon as I stop staring at my screen and drooling all over the damned keyboard.
[User Picture]
From:[info]finchbird
Date:June 30th, 2008 03:18 pm (UTC)
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I should be mad Karl didn't win the poll, but I can't make myself care with all of the hot and awesome in this post.
[User Picture]
From:[info]danceswithelvis
Date:June 30th, 2008 03:25 pm (UTC)
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Ahhh....where do I begin? There is just so much hot and win. Soooo many fantastic shirtless shots too. (And Stewarts thighs! <3 )

We need to have another poll, "Who has the best chest in Star Trek."

I'm incoherent, well more so than norm. Going to go back to staring and drooling.
[User Picture]
From:[info]tarash
Date:June 30th, 2008 04:24 pm (UTC)
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So many captains!
[User Picture]
From:[info]turante
Date:June 30th, 2008 04:35 pm (UTC)
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GUH. Asldfhlahggjhklajlkeaasd hoottttttneessssss!

(Someone else watched Nowhere Man? I thought I was the only one!)
[User Picture]
From:[info]usagivindaloo
Date:June 30th, 2008 05:02 pm (UTC)
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I second the ADKLGLKJFLgKJSLFGK above and add my own bit of LKDFGLSKM GIOLKSGLSFGNLKSG.

Also, that third picture of Avery Brooks.... could it... is it possible... could he be in a production of Othello?!

... I WILL BE IN MY BUNK WITH MY COMPLETE WORKS OF SHAKESPEARE OMG. >.>
(no subject) - (Anonymous)
[User Picture]
From:[info]donna
Date:June 30th, 2008 05:20 pm (UTC)
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I WANT TO DO THEM ALL.
[User Picture]
From:[info]wankismyfandom
Date:June 30th, 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)
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I hereby promote Nichelle Nichols captain of my everything. There. Now she qualifies.
[User Picture]
From:[info]gabsy
Date:June 30th, 2008 07:23 pm (UTC)
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FUCK everyone here is fucking hot.

Lots of love to Shatner, SPock, QUinto, AND POIWHRIERH SIMON PEGG. And Nick Frost. They should never be separated!
[User Picture]
From:[info]tiye
Date:June 30th, 2008 08:18 pm (UTC)
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I always forget how ripped Patrick Stewart is. O_O

Also: Nichelle Nichols is not only teh sex, but she is also incredibly nice. Back when I was a teenie, I emailed her to tell her about my online Star Trek parodies. Thing is, she personally answered my email like two weeks later and said she was delighted to hear from me and would read them. I don't know if she ever did, but still. EEEEEE! <3333333
[User Picture]
From:[info]sepiamagpie
Date:June 30th, 2008 08:38 pm (UTC)
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oh avery brooks. It was his voice that made me a fan of star trek.
[User Picture]
From:[info]rogueunit
Date:June 30th, 2008 09:22 pm (UTC)
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I was going to make a Shaft!Avery joke here but the hotness melted it away! Very nice way to start off the week!
[User Picture]
From:[info]mistal
Date:June 30th, 2008 10:20 pm (UTC)
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:DDDD
<3<3
OOhhh! So much hotness here!

Next Picspam will be hard to bet, hotness wise that is.
From:[info]exdee
Date:July 1st, 2008 05:00 am (UTC)
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Patrick Stewart <3
From:(Anonymous)
Date:March 26th, 2011 08:48 pm (UTC)

profanity

(Link)
NEXT TIME, LEAVE IT OUT............

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