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NM ([info]narcissam) wrote in [info]hp_cornfield,
@ 2007-05-13 16:02:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Just in: God *still* ships Harmony
Previously:
Lockedinaroom's First Letter to the Harmonians 4:11 "In the dream, I was SOOOO sad but now all I can think is "one less delusional idiot on the planet!"

Lockedinaroom's Second Letter to the Harmonians 3:16 ”BUT our Lord Jesus is very gracious to us.
Because I started praying for JKR and our ship. I didn't think He'd do anything because God doesn't like to mess with free will. If JKR wants to write it that way, then so be it. However, that night, I had a dream of grown-up and pregnant H/Hr.”
And now we have been blessed by a new epistle from Lockedinaroom, Harmony Theologian.
I'm going to sound crazy but I go to God about almost everything. After reading HBP and gawking at its awkwardness, I started to tell God how I felt so betrayed by the book and the interview. I also told Him how strange it was that I would get so fed up about someone I've never met.

Anyways, God replied back. He told me not to forget all the "moments" in the last five books. I was reminded of the suspicions of Krum and Cho. Weird, I know... blink.gif But my church is the kind that prays for everything from feeling a little tired to actually being dead. (I've heard of a church where they had to tell people to stop raising the dead because a lot of people were old and ready to go on to the next great adventure.)
Lockedinaroom is not the only person to have discussed shipping with the Almighty. ConstanceVigilance:
That's really neat. I also pray to God all the time and when I was feeling unsure about H/HR I prayed to Him- and all of a sudden, I felt this really intense emotion that made me wonder why I ever questioned H/Hr. During that moment I knew it would be H/Hr in the end. I also felt this same emotion when I was having trouble with my faith, but He set me right again.
Lockedinaroom:
God is awesome! But I know if the critics get wind of this, they'll likely go on a killing spree. lolz

I do feel sorry for the Christians that are OBHWF. They will likely feel confused too and all God can tell them is that they should have been more discerning. One of my spiritual gifts is discerning, BTW. Well, that is assuming that Christian OBHWF'ers feel as strongly about shipping as we h/hr and r/l shippers do.



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(Post a new comment)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 01:09 pm UTC (link)
*flails*

Maybe the reason we still have wars and natural disasters and such is that God's too busy dealing with people like this.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 01:17 pm UTC (link)
WTF? o_O

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 01:49 pm UTC (link)
Okay, that's just silly.

-A Good Name

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 02:14 pm UTC (link)
We really, really aren't all like that, I swear.

And it must be said:
GET OUT OF MY RELIGION, KTXBYE!

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 03:16 pm UTC (link)
I kind of feel bad for Harmonians now-- apparently some of them are going to have a crisis of faith after DH.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]singe, 2007-05-14 10:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-05-15 02:38 am UTC
(no subject) - sockpuppet_rat, 2007-05-15 03:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hinoema, 2007-05-16 11:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2007-05-15 10:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2007-05-15 10:09 pm UTC

[info]julesnoctambule
2007-05-14 04:35 pm UTC (link)
Please -- everyone knows that God ships RL/SB!

Her fics are awesome.


More awesome than the awesomest hot dog ever.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-14 07:50 pm UTC (link)
Anyways, God replied back. He told me not to forget all the "moments" in the last five books.

Of course, God was also sure that Vronsky would realize Anna wasn't worthy of him, and save Kitty before she committed herself to that horribly plebeian marriage.

I hear He's still bitter about that.

(Reply to this)


[info]alya1989262
2007-05-14 08:10 pm UTC (link)
(I've heard of a church where they had to tell people to stop raising the dead because a lot of people were old and ready to go on to the next great adventure.)
Well, that answers the question of 'What the hell is wrong with your brain?'. The zombies were hungry...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rudemistress, 2007-05-16 11:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alya1989262, 2007-05-16 05:06 pm UTC

[info]elwing_alcyone
2007-05-14 09:23 pm UTC (link)
Anyways, God replied back. He told me not to forget all the "moments" in the last five books.

The answer is obvious: God likes fucking with Harmonians as much as everyone else! I bet he reads fandom_wank.

How does God avoid spoilers?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]peachespig, 2007-05-14 09:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2007-05-14 10:27 pm UTC

[info]isntitironic
2007-05-14 10:52 pm UTC (link)
Oooh, I can't wait for July!

In all honesty, I've lost interest in the books themselves. I never really thought they were brilliant and I get kinda sick of hearing about them. The only reason I'll read #7 is to find out if Harry dies.

But the WANK! Oh, lord, I'm rubbing my hands together in glee anticipating the wank! I hope it's as good as the hype...

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankgasm, 2007-05-15 05:59 pm UTC

[info]rowsdower
2007-05-14 11:54 pm UTC (link)
(I've heard of a church where they had to tell people to stop raising the dead because a lot of people were old and ready to go on to the next great adventure.)

I don't think The National Inquirer is a reputable journal of current events, honey.

Though as others have mentioned, I would TOTALLY renounce my atheistic ways if it meant I could go to Our Lady of BRAAAAAINS Church.

(Reply to this)


[info]karmyn75
2007-05-15 12:54 am UTC (link)
So does this mean that anybody who doesn't ship H/Hr is going to hell?
Guess I better reserve that place next to the Lake of Fire. I hear the view is quite hot.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]isntitironic, 2007-05-15 02:52 am UTC

[info]maegwin_of_hern
2007-05-15 03:10 am UTC (link)
Of all the things happening in the world - hunger, diseases, wars, the slow but sure destruction of Nature through Man - are very low on God's To-Do-List. First he has to make sure that a minor plot in a children's book series (albeit a popular one) gets the way a minority of fans wants it to be, despite the free will of the author. Intellectual property is highly overrated, anyways.

(Reply to this)


[info]mochibuni
2007-05-15 05:26 am UTC (link)
Lighting a bush on fire does not mean that God is talking to you!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankgasm, 2007-05-15 06:09 pm UTC

[info]syncopation
2007-05-15 08:35 am UTC (link)
Anyways, God replied back. He told me not to forget all the "moments" in the last five books.

I thought Finals week was going to break my brain, but I was wrong. This did it for me.

And since shipping matters to Him, I hope my own requests of passing my tests are heard, too. Because I'm non-fictional.

(Reply to this)


[info]seeshellirun
2007-05-15 03:35 pm UTC (link)
"but He set me right again."

Was there a switch or a belt involved or....? Because I'm picturing a ruler and some very sore knuckles.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-15 05:02 pm UTC (link)
... I'm scared. Hold me. O.O

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankgasm, 2007-05-15 06:07 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2007-05-15 05:27 pm UTC (link)
Um, I think people have to be very carefull when talking about God and other peoples faith in him, and liking the idea of a fictional couple and what they stand for. I love H/Hr and what (I think) they mean to me, that's why I enjoy lurking here. But..I'm also a Christian and that is way more important to me and I would never look down on another Christian because they have other fictional likes to me. I feel that it is bordering on offensive, and not very Christian to be honest.

Merciful heavens! Is that. . .sanity and a sense of proportion? (And of course no one has replied to the poor horrified lurker).

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankgasm, 2007-05-15 06:05 pm UTC

[info]skewed_tartan
2007-05-15 06:08 pm UTC (link)
I'm making a note to bookmark that site because I definitely want to read the Harmonian equvilent of "The Great Disapointment" after the Ultimate Wank.

(Only a little more than two months to go!)

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-16 05:44 am UTC (link)
God is involved with fandom? Good to know he likes to discuss Harry Potter with God-fearing Harmonians during his free time from being... well, you know, God.

Has someone made an icon yet along the lines of "God ships H/Hr"? Because that would make me smile :D

-darlingpoppet @ lj

(Reply to this)


[info]rachel_pi
2007-05-16 04:25 pm UTC (link)
I agree with whoever said that there is not enough OMGWTFWHAT!?! in the world for this post.

Also, if you can have a crisis of faith and stop believing in God over a fictional couple in a novel, WHAT?

*facepalm*

But..I'm also a Christian and that is way more important to me and I would never look down on another Christian because they have other fictional likes to me. I feel that it is bordering on offensive, and not very Christian to be honest.

Hey, look! Someone who actually understands Christianity!

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-16 05:36 pm UTC (link)
Now people are actually praying to God about ships? This is beyond pathetic. I'm almost tempted to believe these are fakeposts.

They should be praying to get out-of-fandom lives instead.

(Reply to this)


[info]the_mouse
2007-05-19 01:05 am UTC (link)
Are we absolutely positive this isn't a troll? I can't help but think of that one wanker who was a racist Harmonian but then was revealed to be a troll.

Of course, I'm probably thinking like this just to preserve my optimism about humanity.

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-20 03:56 am UTC (link)
Check out this on page five!

Maybe JKR meant to leave the romance as the "fun" part and concentrate on wider themes of love, devotion, and good vs. evil. It would seem that way from her interviews. And in some twisted way, OBHWF is seen as the fun, rollicking, and neat ship.
The bickering lovers R and Hr unite, and the red-haired fire-girl who crushed on Harry from the beginning winds up getting with him.

It's all so ROLLICKING isn't it?
Harry and Hermiones' intellegent arguments and relationship wouldn't be seen as the funky teenage love backstory right?

....

But the OBHWF hints are there and maybe they're not red herrings. Maybe she really just made them accesible on purpose. We were supposed to find every anvil-hint (and maybe even NON-anvil OBHWF hints ) and join along in the fun!


Fight, little sanity! Struggle!

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-05-31 12:52 am UTC (link)
Hey um, I realize this has nothing to do with the post, but does anyone out there have a copy of HBP the harmonian way? I found out about it long after it was gone and I was hoping to read it before the final book came out.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-05-31 12:56 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-06-02 03:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-06-03 08:27 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-06-03 11:21 am UTC


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