Current mood:

*sporfle!*

put your tin-hat on!
Sup mockers!

Thus far, Anonymous has been discovered to be:

Cyber-terrorists
Hackers on steroids
A hate group
Communists
Nazis
Marcabians
Psychiatrist goons/front group
German spies

Now, breaking news - Anonymous is really an NSA/FBI Fishing Expedition!

In summation: Individuals can't really amass without a leader, and the FBI/NSA-watched terrorist group Anonymous would be the perfect front for the government's increasing Internet-surveillance campaign! (did I get it right?)

The logic (at great length):

The "Anonymous" Scientology Protest is an NSA/FBI Fishing Expedition

Greetings fair members and readers of AboveTopSecret.com. Over the past few weeks, we've seen an alarming event, one that initially seemed exceptionally odd to me. After much research, I am now convinced this event is a proactive joint counter intelligence operation from the NSA and FBI. What is this event you might ask? It's the sudden public pronouncements of the "Anonymous Group" to expose the Church of Scientology.

While this subject may demand an essay of epic length, in an effort to succinctly explain my proposition (which I believe to be fact), I'll make a few statements that range from fact to well-informed supposition. My reference material ranges from what is freely available online to recent private conversations among friends within the "intelligence community".

Statement One: The NSA and FBI track online connectivity
Among those who would research the tactics of groups tasked with covertly gathering intelligence, an overarching strategy is clear: all digital communications is either tracked or retained for later tracking. The misconception is that the tracking is for specific communications between "individuals of interest", nothing could be further from the truth. The tracking utilizes complex "fuzzy logic" and artificial intelligence to recognize patterns of connections in an effort to proactively identify "individuals of interest".

Statement Two: The tracking works best with the introduction of a known parameter
A similarly well-known fact among those who would research this tracking is that it is very difficult to discern reliable patterns of connectivity in the overall randomness of every day communications. Therefor, in order produce useable results, predefined parameters will be injected into the communications mix. For example, if a juicy story on vote fraud is introduced via one source, the pattern matching will record the spread of the topic, where it spreads, how it spreads, and who are the primary dispersion points. Depending on the topic, politics, scandal, extraterrestrial cover-ups, 9/11 conspiracies, or what have you, the resulting patterns of dispersal provide a treasure trove of connectivity data -- and when paths of connectivity cross topical areas or repeat-and-loop within a topic, "individuals of interest" are identified.

Statement Three: The NSA has been found "tapping into the Internet"
In fact, President Bush is seeking, no desperate, to grant immunity to the communications conglomerates who cooperated.

Statement Four: The FBI has a history of proactive counter intelligence
The past sixty years are riddled with stories of this government body injecting provocative information into the cultural mix in order to induce a reaction that will cause persons of interest to surface.

Statement Five: The group, "Anonymous", takes a public stance: Project Chanology
Can someone explain to me how a loose-knit subculture of hacker children from 4chan and IRC, formerly known for not much more than defacing MySpace pages and other nuisance hacks/pranks, suddenly takes a public stance on a socially complex issue? And part of the public stance of this "Anonymous" group involves the very un-anonymous action of public space protests.

Statement Six: The group, "Anonymous", is a target of the NSA and FBI
Regardless of the more realistic likelihood that this group is nothing more than bored 15-year olds, both of these agencies have labeled the group "cyber terrorists" and have placed a high priority on infiltration and prosecution.

Statement Seven: The cult, "Church of Scientology", is also targeted by the NSA and FBI
While the U.S. Government would never make the overt mistake of classifying the CoS as a cult, several law enforcement agencies and covert intelligence bodies have applied the distinction of "dangerous cult". Several low-level covert infiltration operations are underway. The operation running through the NSA is rumored to be called "Project Voltar" (the rationale for the name is unknown) and supposedly involves the study of recruitment tactics.

Final Statement: The Chanology Project is a covert pattern injection by the NSA and FBI
I've been able to engage three members of intelligence agencies about the "Chanology Project" purported to be initiated by the "Anonymous" group. All three unequivocally agree that the initiative has all the earmarks of a covert NSA pattern injection that follows the tactical traditions of FBI CoIntelPro. It brilliantly serves two known objectives: 1- identify connectivity patterns related to the "Anonymous" group; 2- increase public criticism of the Scientology cult without risk of discovering a government agency connection.

The dots have been laid before you and connected into a sinister "conspiracy theory" that fits known facts, follows the most widely accepted conjecture of the activities of the NSA, and is supported by a historical record of similar actions.