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	t_boy 2008-02-26 09:18 am UTC (link)
	Oh, my god. It's so funny. Buddhism fell to the Mongols because the monks were all potheads. And white. Ha ha ha, whitey Buddha! (Reply to this)

	criticalcricket 2008-02-26 09:34 am UTC (link)
	That's so beautiful! *wipes away tear* (Reply to this)

	lied_ohne_worte 2008-02-26 11:33 am UTC (link)
	Well, if I had caught my hand in a door, and some random Scientology Volunteer Minister tried to perform the "precise technique of a Contact Assist" on me, he might find my other hand making precise contact with his face. What the... (Reply to this)(Thread)

	solle 2008-02-26 03:25 pm UTC (link)
	Aw, don't be too hard on him. He can't be that "precise" if he thinks that's a "young woman". (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lied_ohne_worte 2008-02-26 03:33 pm UTC (link)
	Heh, the second, close-up picture only loaded for me afterwards - my eyesight isn't exactly great, but she does look a little aged. Perhaps he applied his superpowers wrong, or something? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	luckdragonfujur 2008-02-26 04:36 pm UTC (link)
	That was my first reaction as well: "Young? What?" (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ianthefira 2008-02-26 12:44 pm UTC (link)
	I'm not sure whether to laugh or gape at some of these. Let's go with 'laughing'. OH GOD THE PHOTOS. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	ianthefira 2008-02-26 12:47 pm UTC (link)
	AHAHAH oh god the restaurant one oh god (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	aristaea 2008-02-26 01:10 pm UTC (link)
	I looooooooove the giant bottle of poison marked "POISON" in giant letter with a skull! *roffles* (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	ianthefira 2008-02-26 01:54 pm UTC (link)
	I KNOW add to that the fact that the scientologist apparently determined that by walking in the kitchen and the manager couldn't tell and oh god how could you miss all your customers being poisoned anyway Also, Firefox doesn't recognize 'scientologist' as a word. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	aristaea 2008-02-26 02:15 pm UTC (link)
	LOL FIREFOX WINS. Whyyyyyyy didn't the chef just quit? Did the restaurant owner seduce his wife, and now he has to get revenge? Why not just poison the owner? WHAT. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

ianthefira 2008-02-26 02:26 pm UTC (link)

I'm not going to stop analyzing this situation am I? I'm also wondering why the police haven't intervened prior to this, because that poison bottle looks a lot like the classic bottles of rat poison. Shouldn't someone have been hospitalized? And even if they got rid of the poisoner-guy I think at that point the restaurant would be toast. "Hey everyone we go rid of the poisoner you can come back now :D" Yeah, that'll work. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	luckdragonfujur 2008-02-26 04:43 pm UTC (link)
	That stupid poisoner could make his way a very funny short story. If you're into black humor, that is. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ealusaid 2008-02-27 02:03 am UTC (link)
	Up to that point, it could just be any reasonably batty new-age pop psychology book, but then it took a definite turn for the BATSHIT CONSPIRACISTS. Ahahaha. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	thoms 2008-02-26 02:39 pm UTC (link)
	Those are BEAUTIFUL. (Reply to this)

	luckdragonfujur 2008-02-26 04:40 pm UTC (link)
	There's so much to mock I don't know where to begin. Though I love that one of the first things a Volunteer Minister does is sell scientology books and that he also receives a check near the end. Subtle Elron is subtle. (Reply to this)

	hallidae 2008-02-26 04:57 pm UTC (link)
	::cackling at the burning map:: (Reply to this)

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	flightstothesea 2008-02-26 05:21 pm UTC (link)
	The Vikings are my favourite part. That, and the "EPISCOPAL 1976" bit with the bishops(?) in pointy paper hats. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ealusaid 2008-02-27 02:05 am UTC (link)
	The "location assist" didn't look very useful. He was pointing right at a painting. "You're right here, dude... on a mountaintop, with sheep." (Reply to this)(Parent)

	danceswithelvis 2008-02-26 06:01 pm UTC (link)
	O.o You know, there are lolcat macros in there some place. I'm just too amazed at the stupid to come up with any. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	criticalcricket 2008-02-27 07:05 am UTC (link)
	Well, I got one out of it. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	nam_jai 2008-02-28 03:56 am UTC (link)
	Hee! I love it. I, on the other hand, being untalented at lolcat, made icons instead. A whole bunch of 'em for the taking! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	hilohello 2008-02-26 07:04 pm UTC (link)
	Scientology: It makes those damn dirty hippies start dressing like normal people. And using chairs. (Reply to this)

	nam_jai 2008-02-26 08:03 pm UTC (link)
	And the Volunteer Minister enjoys the fruits of his training. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, know what I mean? (Reply to this)

	hauen 2008-02-26 10:03 pm UTC (link)
	Is it just me or does it look like the "young woman" had no clue how to get her hand out of car door? (Reply to this)

	crickets 2008-02-27 01:07 am UTC (link)
	Gad at the seventies fashions on parade! *claws eyes* In a computerized society where individuality is diminished, there are those who find little or no satisfaction in strict conformity to stereotyped living... I think that guy is just bummed about having to wear a stupid "computer operator" tag. The little labels sprinkled throughout are hilarious. (Reply to this)

	komorebi 2008-02-27 03:03 pm UTC (link)
	Man is wielding what appears to be a rock tied to a shotgun in a threatening manner. Good job, Man. Primitive bayonet, perhaps. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	aristaea 2008-02-27 04:48 pm UTC (link)
	OMG, I didn't notice that the first time I looked! Maybe it's meant to demonstrate the ignorance of early man. Only with the help of the volunteer minister can we gain the insight to use a shotgun properly. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	miraba 2008-02-27 09:16 pm UTC (link)
	I did not notice that. Good job. (Reply to this)(Parent)