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Wankprophet ([info]wankprophet) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2004-08-28 12:44:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood: weird

When Families and Friends Wank...
I originally posted this on my journal, but this is such truly impressive delusional wank that I thought I'd share here.

There's a new kink in the whole idea of "til death do us part."

Somehow, I'm sensing that the family and friends have truly laid claim to that rainbow bridge between delusion and wank. And there are just too many delicious quotes for so short a news item:

family and friends wanted to remember them as a happy couple destined for a happy life together.

....WTF?

In African culture, there is no death -- there is merely the separation of body and soul

Which, you know, is a pretty good working definition of "death" in any culture that believes in souls.

This does not mean the relationship has irretrievably broken down.

I'll let y'all try to work that one out.

It does raise the interesting question of how the family/friends think it can be repaired. Are there many marriage counselors out there who are also accredited mediums?


(Post a new comment)


[info]teratologist
2004-08-28 06:53 pm UTC (link)
Didn't one of the kings of Spain have his murdered fiancee from his princely days dug up a couple decades later so she could be coronated with him?

That said, if some motherfucker shot me I don't know as I'd want to be married to him, dead or alive.

(Reply to this)


[info]puipui
2004-08-28 07:28 pm UTC (link)
This does not mean the relationship has irretrievably broken down.

*attempts to find a new word for "boggles" that might attempt to encompass the sheer state of boggled-ness here*

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]rikoshi
2004-08-28 09:58 pm UTC (link)
Likewise.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]oysteria
2004-08-29 12:48 am UTC (link)
Have I ever mentioned how utterly awesome that icon is?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]rikoshi
2004-08-29 09:10 am UTC (link)
[info]aruru is the one to thank!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


allen
2004-08-29 12:26 am UTC (link)
I do not think there is a word strong enough for this.

Other than, perhaps, what the fucking fuck?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]soy_latte
2004-08-28 09:03 pm UTC (link)
I had a childhood friend who died while having her wisdom teeth out just before her wedding. She was Mormon, and I don't know how much anyone reading this knows about the religion, but I believe she was still sealed to her groom in the Temple. Which basically meant he still got married to her despite what happened and that they would be husband and wife in the afterlife.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]iczer6
2004-08-29 02:53 am UTC (link)
Er how does one *die* during Wisdom tooth removal?

[Seriously I got mine out last year.]


Icz

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]soy_latte
2004-08-29 02:57 am UTC (link)
She was put under and never woke back up. I don't recall exactly what the complication was though.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]iczer6
2004-08-29 03:23 am UTC (link)
Ah.

They had a similar concern when I got mine out, so they decided to just Novocaine the hell out of my mouth instead.

Which probably was the best choice.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]eljuno
2004-08-29 04:44 am UTC (link)
Meanwhile with me, I'm allergic to Novocaine, so I've got pretty much NO idea what they're going to do when I finally get insurance back and get these buggers OUT of my mouth already (Mommy, they bother me and they need to not be there anymore...)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]crickets
2004-08-29 03:15 am UTC (link)
Accidental anaesthesia OD or unforeseen adverse reaction to same.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sarajayechan
2004-08-28 09:58 pm UTC (link)
...Now THAT is disturbing. Not the dead people thing, but the families just not accepting the facts...

(Reply to this)


[info]littlest_lurker
2004-08-29 12:38 am UTC (link)
family and friends wanted to remember them as a happy couple destined for a happy life together

Great, just what I need...an eternity together with the SOB that killed me.

No words.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]crickets
2004-08-29 03:16 am UTC (link)
That was exactly my thought.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]princessdot
2004-08-29 04:31 am UTC (link)
Me three. Talk about my cold dead body......

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]rachelmap
2004-08-29 07:19 am UTC (link)
"African culture?" Which one?

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[info]crickets
2004-08-29 08:27 am UTC (link)
Good point.

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[info]big_bad_wolf
2004-08-29 02:00 pm UTC (link)
That homogenus African culture that you get from an entire continent full of different countries, tribes, races, religion and political viewpoints (oh, and cultures. Nyer), of course! *sniggersnort*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]bishounenhuntrs
2004-08-29 11:55 am UTC (link)
Might be a cultural thing for their tribe(s)/nation(s). *shrug*

(Reply to this)


[info]necronomist
2004-08-29 05:05 pm UTC (link)
"a happy couple destined for a happy life together"

Is that the South African equivalent of 'he was such a nice, quiet neighbor who loved his wife?'

(Reply to this)


[info]visp
2004-08-30 10:36 pm UTC (link)
If some bastard did that to my sister (or even a cousin) I'd do things to that corpse that would make the funeral staff shudder, plus pull up a few charms by whatever religion they believed in to make sure his spirit was condemned to an eternity of suffering - not condemn her to an eternity of more time with him.

The wife's family are assholes and need to be beaten.

(Reply to this)

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