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F.B. Pendergast ([info]pokecheck) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2005-01-04 23:06:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:Frivolous
Current music:"...send mad dogs after her that bite her bum..."

Mr. Izzard doesn't need guns...he has a flag!
Right. So Eddie Izzard fans know the line, "The Nation Rifle Association says 'guns don't kill people, people kill people." But I think the gun helps!"

At Imdb, PlagueOfLosers takes umbrage to Mr. Izzard's comments on gun control. "Eddi (sic) Izzard is a right ignorant boob about guns, isn't he?"

We find out that if one says "people" often enough, it starts to sound funny. "For example, guns don't keep people from being attacked by other people, people keep people from being attacked by other people. BUT I THINK THE GUN HELPS!"

Anyway, people (hee) acknowledge the protection angle of guns, point out the dangers of guns and remind PlagueOfLosers that Eddie Izzard talks about thimbles and jam and cats drilling so lighten up.


"Anti-gunners must think that if they avoid mentioning that, that their banging on only about the costs of guns will make them look like a morally righteous person. Sorry, no. Your refusal to talk about the people who are here, alive and well, because they had a gun, counts against you. How can you be righteous if you ignore convenient facts because they clash with your beliefs? Shouldn't you try to be less wilfully ignorant?"

More acknowledgement that guns can be used for protection but blah blah blah. PlagueOfLosers still insists all anti-gun people are dishonest or something, pulls out the Honesty Measuring Tape and waits. "OK, I admit [that guns can be bad], since I am honest. Now, you admit that sometimes people save their lives by using guns and the fact is that guns can be used for good purposes. Because I want to see how honest you can be. Or how dishonest.

Levelheaded discussion continues without you-know-who, who then comes back with this last lovely tidbit.

"It's interesting, this idea that one can go 'too far' in supporting gun rights...you never do hear it said that people go too far in promoting victim disarmament, why is that? Why is it, in fact, that supposed gun-rights supporters like yourself are in such a hurry to denounce others as being 'too extreme' and 'perpetuating stereotypes'(while, again, completely failing to excoriate the very people - anti-gun types - who conceived of those stereotypes in the first place, and do far more to popularize said stereotypes?)? Not to mention this silly 'making the worst argument possible', like, um, stating that guns are useful in protecting one from psychos and violent thieves. That's bound to turn off the average bloke, pushing this idea that they wouldn't have to put up with criminal aggression.

Maybe people like you don't actually want people to have such rights to use guns for self-protection. Maybe people like you are happy to give up your rights, and be an ineffective pu$$y in the face of your opposite number. Maybe you have this sick idea that pro-gun folk have to be doormats for the mighty anti.

Or maybe you're a liar and a fraud. Yeah, that's probably it.

BANG! Caught lying here.
...
I'll be impressed if you come clean about being a liar. And a fraud. And(if you truly support gun ownership for self-defence) a backstabber."


On a non-wanky note, some friendly Swedish people take over the thread every now and then, ending with this hilarious line, "I tried to be openminded! But there was this problem with my brain falling out of my skull."



(Post a new comment)


[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-05 11:37 am UTC (link)
That was always one of my favorite Eddie Izzard lines. "You're not going to kill too many people by standing around going 'bang! bang!'"

I used to think that having guns as protection was a bloody brilliant idea. Then I actually did research on the topic and found out that it isn't. It might help if you know how to use it, unlike a lot of people. Then again, if you pull a gun on an attacker, it's pretty likely that s/he is likely to freak out and shoot _you_, and a professional criminal probably knows how to use their gun better than you do.

[/rant on guns]

I also liked Dave Barry's quote on the subject: "The Second Amendment states that, since a well-regulated militia is necessary to the security of a free state, you can buy high-powered guns via mail order and go out into the woods with your friends and absolutely vaporize some deer."

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[info]squib
2005-01-05 11:53 am UTC (link)
I'm not going to turn this into wank, I swear... no matter how tempting it is.

But anyone who has *any* potentially dangerous tool and doesn't learn how to use it deserves whatever they get, and if they're too afraid of it to take lessons, they don't belong anywhere near it.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-05 11:57 am UTC (link)
And then if you have kids you can't keep it loaded anyway, so ... I'd like to see statistics on how many people's lives have actually been saved by guns, outside of law enforcement. I mean, seriously. There are so many reasons why owning one is more dangerous than not owning them.

Yeah. It's kind of like telling your kids not to mess with fire until they're old enough to learn to use the fire extinguisher too.

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[info]pokecheck
2005-01-05 12:08 pm UTC (link)
But if you didn't have a gun, you'd be "an ineffective pu$$y in the face of your opposite number."

Seriously, what the hell does that mean?

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[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-05 12:14 pm UTC (link)
I think it means that you would be "a useless woman's genital region looking at your antithetical amount." [nods helpfully]

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]pyratejenni
2005-01-05 05:24 pm UTC (link)
Because of course, you're never taken by surprise. Or outnumbered.

]

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[info]msmanna
2005-01-06 12:51 am UTC (link)
I'd like to see statistics on how many people's lives have actually been saved by guns</>

So would The National Academies. Unfortunately, after a survety of the available research to done to date, they decided that the evidence is so useless, contradictory or inconclusive that it's impossible to say.

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[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-06 01:06 am UTC (link)
Hmm. If one was a psychologist and wanted to study this, I bet there's lots of money being thrown around.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]mistressrenet
2005-01-05 03:42 pm UTC (link)
My husband hunts so we have guns in the house. They're in a safe (usually) and we keep the ammo elsewhere. I know how to shoot and honestly? I can't even conceptualize pulling a gun on someone. If you have a gun, there's no excuse not to be responsible. And using one for self-defense, unless you're a cop or something? Not necessarily the brightest idea.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]fuzzytowers
2005-01-05 06:43 pm UTC (link)
I grew up with a whole house just full of guns. The ammo was kept in an unlocked drawer with the big Clint Eastwood gun. Yep. I also played with a rusty metal dollhouse, ran barefoot on sidewalks, swam in untreated water, ate raw cookie dough (and got to lick the spoon), talked to strangers, and read Jack Chick tracts.

Meh. My Mommy loved me. It was the '60s. We had candy cigarettes too. Two packs a day later and I struggle with quitting constantly.

You are absolutely correct, there is no excuse for not being a responsible gun owner. There is no reason to point a gun at another human being. Most of the time all it will get you is dead.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]mistressrenet
2005-01-05 06:50 pm UTC (link)
If anyone tries to take my raw cookie dough away I will cut them.

I had bubblegum cigars. We were hardcore. The other day, my mother asked me why I had a guy smoking on my t-shirt. How times change....

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-06 01:07 am UTC (link)
I still run barefoot on sidewalks. And frequently step on things that make me go "ow" but it hasn't stopped me yet.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]renata_hpjc
2005-01-06 06:15 pm UTC (link)
Yay for running around with no shoes!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]shun_mcdaddy
2005-01-07 03:28 pm UTC (link)
Grew up in ghetto philly,I remember I used to that when I was young.:)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]pradaloz
2005-01-06 11:44 pm UTC (link)
We had candy cigarettes too.

Ah, candy tobacco. The gateway drug to a full-fledged sugar addiction.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


(Anonymous)
2005-01-05 06:24 pm UTC (link)
*Random love for the Dave Barry part*

I shall give you some of my cheese as a reward! Here!

Yours,
The Anonymouse

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]the_clansmen
2005-01-05 09:10 pm UTC (link)
I love that quote because it kind of demonstrates the absurdity of some of the NRA's arguments. I have no problem with hunting specifically, but a lot of the 2nd amendment arguments really are kind of bizarre when you put them in those kind of terms.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]fuzzytowers
2005-01-05 06:50 pm UTC (link)
The idea not being put across by the second amendment people is one of revolution. If the government is ever taken over by wankers that we, the people, are profoundly unhappy with, and they decide they don't want to leave, well, we can MAKE them leave. Because we, the little guys, are armed. Unfortunately, the idea that an Uzi can do jack against the armed forces that the government has at its command is laughable now. It's loads more complicated these days. Actually, it was more complicated in the days of Muskets too, having to do with standing militias being regulated in each Commonwealth/State, etc. Nothing is ever as simple as a sound bite. That's where we all go wrong.

Plus, you look like a wild-eyed conspiracy freak if you bring it up.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]shatfat
2005-01-05 08:03 pm UTC (link)
Not only is an Uzi going to do jack-shit against armored tanks and air support, but even in the days of muskets, armed bands failed to overthrow the government.

The gun nuts should Google "Shay's Rebellion" sometime.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]vasaris
2005-01-05 08:06 pm UTC (link)
Let's not even mention the number of officers killed with their own sidearms when the bad guy manages to get it away from them. And they're trained to try and prevent that.

I'm honest, I'll acknowledge that guns can save people ala the infamous Seattle gun store robbery where the theif was handily ventilated by the owner (ironically, the cop with him missed the guy).

But when adding all of the accidental deaths and the deaths by 'shit, he took my gun' I expect it's rather larger than 'Daaaamn. I got the bad guy' stories.

I've no particular issue with hunting rifles or even handguns when the owner knows how to use them and keeps them on their person (not lying around, not in their purse in the kitchen) or in the gun safe (although I think that's still ridiculous, as the little kid in the anecdote below says, you gonna ask the baddie to wait until you find and load your weapon?) but no one needs a Mac 10 or an Uzi to defend their home.

I mean, Christ, you might as well let the burglar take your stuff than use a fully automatic weapon of that kind. The property damge would probably cost more than letting insurance cover it. And if you find a guy in the process of assaulting some one, what are you going to tell the police when you accidentally kill the victim too? Oops? /wank

*shakes head and finds white spatter hitting the walls* Christ, I need a towel.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ashenmote
2005-01-06 12:55 pm UTC (link)
And if you find a guy in the process of assaulting some one, what are you going to tell the police when you accidentally kill the victim too?

My muse icon says I could simply shoot at the police too then.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]vasaris
2005-01-06 06:28 pm UTC (link)
*snickers*

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[info]pradaloz
2005-01-06 11:34 pm UTC (link)
But would it be insensitive to *lick boobies* afterwards?

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[info]llama_treats
2005-01-05 01:54 pm UTC (link)
You know, when I think about Izzard!Wank, I think about something completely different from gun control.

(O.K., maybe it's not all that different.)

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[info]pokecheck
2005-01-06 01:01 am UTC (link)
I'll bite. What do you think of when you think about Izzard!Wank?

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[info]atalantapendrag
2005-01-06 05:22 am UTC (link)
Thinking about Izzard has been known to make me wank.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]llama_treats
2005-01-06 09:07 am UTC (link)
I think of James Mason...naked.

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[info]pokecheck
2005-01-06 12:16 pm UTC (link)
Jeezy Creezy!

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[info]ashenmote
2005-01-05 04:38 pm UTC (link)
"And(if you truly support gun ownership for self-defence) a backstabber."

Backshooter, if anything. Bloody liar.

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[info]vasaris
2005-01-05 07:41 pm UTC (link)
*glomp*

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[info]ashenmote
2005-01-05 07:43 pm UTC (link)
*cuddles*

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[info]pradaloz
2005-01-05 05:05 pm UTC (link)
I have this vivid memory of being in sixth grade and having some adult address my elementary school class about the importance of guns (which I find odd, since this was a public school, but then again, Virginia is the home of the NRA...). The guy spoke about how responsible gun owners keep their guns in safes with the safeties on and ammo out and so forth. He then proceeded to talk about how important it was to have guns on hand to defend oneself and one's family from burglars and rapists and murders and whatnot. At that point, one of my classmates raised his hand and asked, "But if someone breaks into your house and you find him taking your stuff, are you going to ask him to wait while you go get your gun from the safe? And load it?"

Stymied by an eleven-year-old. Classic.

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[info]renata_hpjc
2005-01-06 06:28 pm UTC (link)
Heee.

Honestly, I'm all for guns for hunting, guns for target shooting, guns for collecting, yadda yadda, but guns for self-defense just makes me roll my eyes. I know there's no reliable data out there one way or the other, and I know anecdotal evidence is worthless, but I've been attacked in my home and a friend of mine was robbed and beaten on the street -- owning a gun wouldn't have spared either of us. Due to the circumstances, neither or us would even have had the dubious pleasure of being able to shoot the bastards as they ran away.

Renata

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[info]pradaloz
2005-01-06 11:42 pm UTC (link)
Word on all counts. Hunting isn't my bag, but I have a friend who's a crack shoot and makes a mean venison chili, so I'm down with other people doing it (even if it does mean I have to refrain from trail riding with my horse on many a lovely fall day). But the "guns to save the children!" rhetoric makes me wonder if the people spouting it don't secretly want to go back in time to the Wild West so they can have shoot-outs in the street.

I'm glad you and your friend came through your awful experiences all right!

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[info]bitca
2005-01-05 07:58 pm UTC (link)
Ah Izzard!Wank! My life is complete.

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[info]loony666
2005-01-05 09:27 pm UTC (link)
Isn't there a small town somewhere where everybody has a gun and the crime rate is zero?

That said, I agree with gun control, Swedes are funny and PlagueOfLosers is an ineffective pu$$y. Or something.

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[info]gal_montag
2005-01-06 08:00 am UTC (link)
Are we forgetting that Eddie is *British* and has little to no effect on the politics of gun ownership in the US anyway? And like, who cares if he's about guns or not, he's a fucking comedian.

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[info]rogue
2005-01-07 02:41 am UTC (link)
Everyone needs to watch that episode of Homicide: Life on the Street where this paranoid little man accidentally shoots a confused Kiss fanboy dead on his front porch because he thought he was a robber.

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