Stray cat wank
Pet wank!

Oh, Practical Pet Care, you never let me down.

*ahem*

It all started with NC6EGRNGLO posting to the Experts Only forum (You'll not be able to get in to see it if you're not an expert) venting about her troubles with some stray cats that have taken up residence at her place and are bothering her pets.


I am SO P*$$&d. There is nothing I hate more than having to deal with stray animals in my yard. Before my husband and I moved into this new home, we lived in a trailer park where there were dozens of stray cats. Over a period of about a month, I was able to successfully trap all but one and take them to the Humane Society. Now, in the new home, we have been awakened for the past 4 nights by yowling and carrying on outside. Not only this, but there are cat paw prints all over my car (grrrrrrrrrrr ), the damn thing has sprayed around the basement windows and the basement now reeks of cat musk, and it has now started pooping and peeing on our porch.

Usually the cat is on the other side of the house, but lastnight it was on our back porch, which is right next to our bedroom window. I awoke to typical tom-cat yowling and growling, so I got up, went to the back door, and scared it off -- with some help from Gypsy, who ensured that it went all the way out of the yard. This morning, when I started out the door to come to work, I saw it; two 'piles' of cat poo and streaks of cat urine all over the porch and the rug. This is the last straw. I don't have any way to get another trap until Monday, and I swear if I see the little b@$^@rd again I'm using it for target practice! It's white, so it shouldn't be that difficult.

Our cat, Rascal (who is neutered), is not allowed outside, so I don't know why in the world this cat is doing this. Plus, I really don't want him to start his yowling again, or take up spraying inside. Is there ANYTHING I can do to repel it? I know cats don't like citrus, but I can't afford that many oranges, and I really don't want to attract bugs while I'm keeping away the cat(s). I've heard that moth balls will do the trick, but I'd rather not put moth balls around the perimeter of my property; I'd hate it if an animal ate one and died or something. Do any of you know a 'natural' solution until I can get the trap and haul his little butt off? Do coffee grounds really work, and if so, how thick would I have to spread them around the property line?

Evidently a lot of wankers other experts took her seriously when she talked about shooting the cat and went absolutely batshit. Did you catch it? It was only one line of the entire post...
Somehow it all spiraled into them thinking this woman wanted to shoot all stray cats.

used_to_be_red_kitty_cat, who has nearly sixty cats herself, takes offense. The implication is the OP is murdering stray cats by trapping them humanely and taking them to animal shelters. Because, y'know, stray cats are automatically put down. They're never put up for adoption or anything like that. That started in the Experts Only forum.
She comes back later with a quip about "animal killers" being at the top of her list of horrid people; I couldn't resist making a snide comment about hoping she was vegan after that.

HedgeMom, the woman who believes Iraqis are not human beings and should be exterminated, completely loses her shit.

I'm going to suggest your removal as an expert. Anyone who advocates the killing of a stray for doing what comes natural to him is heartless, cruel and doesn't belong here.

It's a very simple solution. He needs to be caught, neutered and kept inside. Oh but *gasp* you can't do that. YOU have nice stuff and can't have the dog inside so I'm sure you won't want a stray inside.

Shame when someone picks replacable material possessions over a living, feeling creature. Wow.


There are a few voices of sanity in the way of AWR Rabbitry who says, essentially, "Yeah, it was in poor taste, but Jesus Fuck, chill out you idiots." (only AWR doesn't swear)
Admins Swoozie and Squish agree, and state that at some point most pet owners will jokingly say, "I'm going to kill that dog/cat" or other similar phrases.

Daneworship then comes in with the holier than thou reply of: "I can honestly admit that I have NEVER thought about nor wanted to kill any of my animals, in jest or otherwise, for doing anything.
But it's probably because I am just a WAY better person that you are!"

It doesn't end there!

Ms. "I own fifty seven cats, but I'm not a hoarder, HONEST" comes in at that point and says that it be moved to the Argument Forum.

It was.
And now, the whole thing is public.

It spans two threads and is just...laughable.
The high number of holier-than-thou admins and mods on that site who take the world way too seriously is worth a point and snicker.

EDIT: In speaking over IM with the owner of the site, I've found that several people think NC6EGRNGLO = Necroangel, which is a nickname I used to use. Apparently some people think this person is me. Ooookay then. Let's add paranoia to the checklist here.