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issendai ([info]issendai) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2005-08-08 14:21:00


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Cyclical wank
Remember Cyclotouriste, aka John Gobin Shaw, the cross-country-bicycling gentleman who knew about 911 and who called so memorably for a female traveling companion about two months ago? He just found the wank, and is now giving his side of the story, complete with confusion of third and first person, allegations of CENSORSHIP!, and, uh, an Ebay ad.

I don't get it either.

It's mostly just the sound of one hand wanking at the moment, but there's moist and steamy potential.


(Post a new comment)


[info]funkyhelix
2005-08-08 07:43 pm UTC (link)

Reading his comments gives me that same queasy feeling like looking at grotesque style paintings of beautiful women with four eyes and two mouths.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]xero_sky
2005-08-08 08:01 pm UTC (link)
I'm getting that Picasso feeling. Not the "Oh, look, one of the great artists of the 20th century!" feeling, but the "Jesus Christ, where's her other eye? And is that a boob, or does she have some sort of horrible spinal deformity?" feeling.

I need aspirin, stat.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]funkyhelix
2005-08-08 08:03 pm UTC (link)
See, abstract I like. Grotesque leaves me with a need to lie down with a cold towel to my forehead.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


kroki_refur
2005-08-08 07:49 pm UTC (link)
...that is just...

...what?

(Reply to this)


[info]phosfate
2005-08-08 07:59 pm UTC (link)
Way to be on the ball there, John.

(Reply to this)


[info]crickets
2005-08-08 09:27 pm UTC (link)
...

That's some serious nuttery there.

(Reply to this)


[info]goblin
2005-08-08 09:28 pm UTC (link)
Woah. That's some scary batshit right there, that is. I don't even want to comment, cuz I'm afraid he'll FIND ME AND KILL ME CUZ I'M A CHICKENSHIT COWARD POLTROOOOOON.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]issendai
2005-08-08 09:48 pm UTC (link)
He's due to find this post in, oh, October, so you're already in for a crazy invasion. May as well get it over with now and go, er, engage him in a productive dialogue.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]goblin
2005-08-08 10:02 pm UTC (link)
Engaging in productive dialogue has never before sounded quite so filthy...or horrifying.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]jat_sapphire
2005-08-09 01:20 am UTC (link)
*pouts* Where's the eBay ad? I can't find it.

I do love the third person, as if anyone could possibly for one moment believe this was NOT John Gobin Shaw posting.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]issendai
2005-08-09 10:14 pm UTC (link)
A mod must have deleted it. It was a completely random posting for a bicycle, with what looked like a buyer's question at the bottom.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]teruhiko
2005-08-09 05:14 am UTC (link)
He survived Ireland’s worst railroad disaster of August 1, 1980 in which eighteen people were killed and about sixty-five were injured.

Agh, man. Step off my country. Not to mention my county within that country, which is where that disaster took place. The anniversary was just a week or so ago. Geez. Even if he was involved in it, he could have the decency not to tout the fact that he "survived" all over the place.

Also, anyone can "read several books" on what's going on in the North. That doesn't mean they totally understand what it's like up there.

... Bah, sorry, just getting a bit defensive there. It's a touchy subject for me. This guy is nuts.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


(Anonymous)
2005-08-12 12:00 am UTC (link)
I bet he survived it by not being anywhere near it at the time.

lordlucan of LJ

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(Anonymous)
2005-08-15 07:57 am UTC (link)
Holy SHIT man.

It's like living with my father again. He's a high functioning schizophrenic, and he held us all captive with his paranoid stories until the day he remarried and moved to Montana where 'they' couldn't find him to try and kill him by making him sick anymore.

I love my dad, but he's batshit insane...and so's this poor fellow.

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(Anonymous)
2005-08-15 07:57 am UTC (link)
By the way, I'm Lukadia on LJ--sorry for the squeaking.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]issendai
2005-08-15 03:49 pm UTC (link)
til the day he remarried

This is the part of your post that scares me the most.

And word to the batshit insane. He's more articulate than most, but there's something very wrong there.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


 
   
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