Current mood:

logic ... it hurts ...

Kali versus Jesus versus Allah versus Buddha versus Lakshmi
I found me some good religion wank.

Hindupaintings.com is a large site that sells Indian goods, especially Hindu art - in other words, PAGAN IDOLS. They also have articles about Hinduism to guide one through their demonic religion. You can leave reviews on the articles ... you can see where this is going, right?

> THE WANK <

It all begins when Louise, good Christian warrior, leaves a review warning the followers of Kali that they are worshipping a demon and will burn in hell. Many, many pages of wank follow.

It would be just run-of-the-mill religion wank, but it has some great moments (all bolding mine):

Kali does possess people because I have seen people who are plagued with her demonic influence come to my church and beg God to be merciful to them. They begged to be cured of her possession, her evil power.
Paganism is seen by many as a cool, modern-day religion without dogma and rules and regulations. But this is a false assumption.

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"My husband was charmed in 1992 because of jelousy and envy. The person who charmed my hubby wanted him dead. The evil person managed to kill my hubby's youngest brother (34 years old with two little kids 1 1/2 and 2 1/2 years old). The evil person (evp) pinned 5 places of operation of which 2 he succeded made my hubby alcholic, diabetic, lever cirrohsis, pressure, gastric ulcer and tried to make him go coo coo and wanted my hubby to hand over all his properties and what ever he had and make him like a stray dog and not realizing who he himself was. To make it short :-
We got mother kaali's help to overcome the evil that has been put on my hubby. She removed everthing that was done to my hubby and made him a free man with no sicknessess. Please contact us on this e-mail and we will share with you whatever we know as to how to worship her."

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"Jesus Christ is lord, and he IS a historical reality, this was proven without a doubt years and years ago by a scientist and historian. You cannot argue with this concrete proof you unbelieving judas and sinner.

The Lord convicts me to condemn you, because you are truly a sinner and will not repent for your arrogance is great. Godly anger swells inside me and Jesus himself turns his holy face away from you and your moral degradation.

Shame on you."

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"Kali makes me happy she just makes me want to have sex"

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"Are there any Jedi's in all this? I'm confused."

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"All this talk of gods disturbs me slightly. Do you not see your own divinity and Buddha-ness? Do these higher powers really deserve worship from us, when they are simply Devas and spiritual creatures on a different Karmic level to us humans?"

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"Hi I'm jesus....my dad wasn't very good in bed and couldn't keep a job so mom took matters into her own hand. I don't think I look like an egyptian tourist though(shrugs). Anyway I'm sure glad my mom wasn't around 2000 years in advance, I might have been aborted. When I grew up I tried to sort out my life, didn't have any zoloft though. I spent most of my time in brothals where I discovered the true meaning of life."

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"'There is no god but Allah, and his prophet is Mohammed'.

'Insha Allah-God willing'.

you should remember these two statements. they govern the central tenets of Islam, the sole existance of ALLAH as the one, true god and his power over the destiny of all creatures. i suggest that you go to a mosque and ask the resident Imam a lot of questions about his faith and the faith of all Muslims, you are living in ignorance and blindly accepting media stereotypes."

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"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING ON THIS WEBSITE YOUR A FUCKING MUSLIM YOU HYPOCRITE! THIS IS A HINDU SITE."

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"Most historians and scientists agree that Jesus Christ MUST have existed. If he did not the entire world would fall apart, not least because the entire chronology of humankind is based on his birth, 2,000 years ago in a stable, surrounded by shepherds and visited by the three wise men who gave him gold, frankinsence and myrrh."

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"I believe in Kali,,Vishnu,Odin,Amon,Ra,Shiva,Agni and Mighty Thor as well as Leprechauns and angels."

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"I don't believe in Shadrack. Shadrack doesn't exist, and there is nothing anybody can do to prove otherwise. Believing in Shadrack is even more stupid than believing in scientism. http://www.neopagan.net/Scientism.html"

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"HELP i have this spell book and me and my friends were playing around and saw a spell called the "the hyhm of kali" and it hads 2 do w/ the goddess and we did it and now two of the four ppl who did it with us r in the hospital. i really need help! if any info plz contacted me at my mail address.! ps we did the spell cuz my real name is cali!"

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"Hey guys, this all dangerous stuff. Yes, the goddess Kali is a real personage. She is a goddess of evil and destruction.
If you want to worship, and pray to a benevolent mother-goddess then try Lakshmi, Sarasvati, Parvati, or Uma.

Lakshmi is my patron goddess, and she is a loving, kind being. She never punishes or inflicts pain, and she can bring you closer to spiritual truth and knowledge. Forget Kali, she may be a face of Brahman, and a form of Shiva's wife Parvati, but she is dark and terrible."

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"and by the way isana, you don't even know me and what i am going through so please don't judge ok. you need Jesus because he is alive. you are the first person that i have ever heard that said Jesus never existed. historically he was proven to exist and biblically.
even athiests believe that Jesus existed, even though they do not believ in God."

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"i just want all u kali worshippers to know that your so call goddess is a demon from satan. i know this because i have that nasty demon in me. my tounge come out just like kali ans that demon manifests when i call it by its name "kali". kali came in me through laying of hands of a demon possed person who worsips kali ok."

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"demons may not be our freinds,... but there so motherf$#@ing cool though. do you remember all those old motherf@%#ing heavy metal shirts like iron maden, and all those other motherf%#$ing bands with all the motherf&%#$ing demons screeming and stabing stuff all over it it. one word. awsome!!! almost as cool as the thugi people in indiana jones and the temple of doom."

I would have quoted more from Louise, but she (courageously) keeps saying the same thing over and over and over in the face of demonic logic, and I didn't know what to pick.

Those interested in pretty might enjoy browsing their paintings for sale. The jpegs are of rather good size for an art store.