the_wanlorn
2005-11-17 11:03 pm UTC (link)

may just be another coping mechanism. sure men think (our boyfriends, husbands, society at large)it's "hot" if we too share in their enjoyment of porn, giving us that "cool girlfriend' position/image.

Sooo what does it mean if you have girly bits and like porn but won't admit it to people?

(Because y'all aren't people. You're robots! On the other side of my screen! Pretending to be real! Like Pinnochio, but scarier.)

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	kookaburra 2005-11-17 11:11 pm UTC (link)
	I know- there's so much I share because of the anonymity of the internet that I never talk about IRL. internet behaviour=/= RL habits. (usually) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	the_wanlorn 2005-11-17 11:27 pm UTC (link)
	Oh yeah, there's a hella lotta stuff that I tell my internet friends that I would never ever ever ever ever in a million years tell my real life friends. 'Course, it also means that I can never meet my internet friends because I'd die of embarrassment. ;_; (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	greenling 2005-11-18 06:08 pm UTC (link)
	It's weird... I do the same thing. Then I meet my real life friends on the internet, tell them stuff, and manage to be completely surprised when it comes up in normal conversation and/or think afterwards it happened online. Coping mechanism or something? o.O Makes me wonder what sort of bizarre crap will happen when I do meet my online friends. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	the_wanlorn 2005-11-18 06:29 pm UTC (link)
	You'll go into shock from all of the crazy stuff that they know about you. have a heart attack, and die! And the worms will eat you. And play pinochle on your snout. And such. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	phosfate 2005-11-18 12:03 am UTC (link)
	Shit! She's on to us. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	the_wanlorn 2005-11-18 12:04 am UTC (link)
	I knew it! I knew it! Say, if you guys help me take over the world, I won't tell the other real-life people I know... ~~but I will dismantle you when it's all done mwahahahahahaha~~ (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	phosfate 2005-11-18 12:07 am UTC (link)
	"Other real-life people." AHAHAHAHAHAHA, that's good. Sorry, but I'm afraid it's just you, the original MTV veejays, and Alan Thicke. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	the_wanlorn 2005-11-18 12:11 am UTC (link)
	NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Why?? Why Alan Thicke?!?!?!?! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	puipui 2005-11-18 02:21 am UTC (link)
	Huh. Weird. I could've sworn Alan Thicke was a robot. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	kyuuketsukirui 2005-11-17 11:10 pm UTC (link)
	The first post is locked. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	eilan 2005-11-17 11:14 pm UTC (link)
	Ouups. To summarise, the Op talks about labiaplasty, and the third sentence of hers is the sentence I quoted. People disagree with her that the only reason girls have low self-esteem is porn. The OP doesn't respond to any comments. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	redwarrior 2005-11-21 11:47 pm UTC (link)
	Umm...what if your vagial lips continuously get caught in your pants zipper? That doens't have to do with porn... (Reply to this)(Parent)

marciamarcia
2005-11-17 11:14 pm UTC (link)

I love that she says this:

may just be another coping mechanism. sure men think (our boyfriends, husbands, society at large)it's "hot" if we too share in their enjoyment of porn, giving us that "cool girlfriend' position/image.

Then gets all huffy about the anti-porn people not being willing to just live and let live.
This is why I hate anti-porn people. Because it's never ok for me to like porn and them not...there HAS to be something wrong with me. There just has to.

And that body image crap is just that. Porn does not cause women's body image issues. I got my body image issues LONG before I ever saw porn. "Cosmo," "Seventeen," and my junior high peers took that honor. For crap's sake, looking at Suicide Girls actually made me feel BETTER about my own body.

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	sarajayechan 2005-11-17 11:54 pm UTC (link)
	I know! Jeez, for a bunch of self-proclaimed feministic types (that's the impression I get from them anyway) they sure love making assumptions and psychologically stereotyping women. >:P (Reply to this)(Parent)

	phosfate 2005-11-18 12:05 am UTC (link)
	"Cosmo," "Seventeen," and my junior high peers took that honor. Truly. The first porn I saw was shocking, because all the lady parts were allowed to obey the dictates of gravity. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	doomsday 2005-11-18 12:27 am UTC (link)
	Agreed. I've yet to be envious of the body of a porn star. Many look like they were ridden hard and put away wet (pun so intended). Fashion magazines, otoh, sometimes aren't very nice to my body image. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	somnambulicious 2005-11-18 12:10 am UTC (link)
	I love it when they backpedal before they even finish the original post. "I think you just pretend to enjoy porn. But you might have legitimate reasons! But, on the other hand, I think you're just pretending." (Reply to this)

(Anonymous)
2005-11-18 12:16 am UTC (link)

i think it's a little sad (and perhaps representative) that whenever anyone says anything negative about porn in this community a million people speak up. the general tone is that they love/enjoy/get off to porn, and don't see any problems with it -it being the films themselves, not the enjoyment :)
it seems important for those people-women- to make it known that they watch and enjoy pornography. From my perspective, that may just be another coping mechanism. sure men think (our boyfriends, husbands, society at large)it's "hot" if we too share in their enjoyment of porn, giving us that "cool girlfriend' position/image.

Or, you know, it could be because people like to talk about themselves and tend to go, "I acknowledge your comment, and now I'd like to talk about myself, yay!"

-H

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	doomsday 2005-11-18 12:33 am UTC (link)
	TMI time: This ladies from the second post have obviously never met any of my ex-bfs, all of whom were loath to admit they even liked porn, let alone watch it with me. I'll take their "you're a cool gf for liking porn" types any day. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	lush_rimbaud 2005-11-18 02:27 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, God, I know. What is with guys like that? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	greenling 2005-11-18 06:10 pm UTC (link)
	They think you'll get pissed and yell at them if they explicitly admit you're not the only female to have ever crossed their minds in a sexual fashion. I blame sitcoms. :P (Reply to this)(Parent)

xero_sky
2005-11-18 01:22 am UTC (link)

If it really were just one's personal preference it wouldn't be bragged about like some exotic indulgence that sets one apart from the rest.

Or maybe what the woman in question was really bragging about was that she felt empowered enough to openly like porn.

Alternatively, she could've just been having fun watching Little Miss Fussypants over there turn various shades of pink.

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	puipui 2005-11-18 02:25 am UTC (link)
	If it really were just one's personal preference it wouldn't be bragged about like some exotic indulgence that sets one apart from the rest. Yes, because I've never seen anyone on the internet brag about their personal preferences just because they like to talk about themselves and their personal preferences. Ever ever ever. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mistal 2005-11-18 01:23 am UTC (link)
	Good to know that I'm trying to be the "cool girlfriend" to this unknown boyfriend s/h/it seems to think I have... And has for society at large --> In my little corner of the world/country, porn isn't discuss as if it was a normal thing (except at my lunch table). porn and sex are still a bit taboo. (Reply to this)

skewed_tartan
2005-11-18 04:06 am UTC (link)

may just be another coping mechanism. sure men think (our boyfriends, husbands, society at large)it's "hot" if we too share in their enjoyment of porn, giving us that "cool girlfriend' position/image.

Because everything a woman does is somehow related to a man, even lesbians think of men in their daily actions.

Tch, I look at porn because I *like* it, not because I want to be someone's "cool" girlfriend. Someone needs to wake-up to 21st century femninism here.

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	funwithrage 2005-11-18 04:48 am UTC (link)
	I'm not hugely into mainstream porn, admittedly. However, I find the "my boyfriend should never look at other women" chicks lame beyond all reason. Get some security and stop wigging, people. Gyah. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	xero_sky 2005-11-18 05:30 am UTC (link)
	I totally didn't get how looking at porn makes a boyfriend 'disrespectful', either. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	bubosquared 2005-11-18 08:07 am UTC (link)
	It's almost as bad as the "OMG My boyfriend MASTURBATES!!!one!1!" crowd. Which, a) for god's sake, and b) this implies that they don't masturbate either, and depending solely on someone else to fulfil your sexual needs? Eh? Surely sometimes you just feel horny and you wanna just get off without all the sweating and work sex requires? Straight girls are weird, man. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	marciamarcia 2005-11-18 04:16 pm UTC (link)
	I like the girl who claims that "guys don't talk about porn all the time." I want to know what guys she's hanging out with. And whether they've been castrated. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	gweniveeve 2005-11-18 06:25 am UTC (link)
	So, if I ever watched porn with a boyfriend ~~dammit how much longer am I going to be single~~, would it count as "being the cool girlfriend" if I just laugh? (Reply to this)(Thread)

	marciamarcia 2005-11-18 04:15 pm UTC (link)
	So that happens to you, too, huh? There's some porn I'm not allowed to watch with my husband because it's just so ridiculous it makes me giggle and that apparently "ruins" it for him or something. ;) (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	gweniveeve 2005-11-18 04:19 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, I can see how ir wouldn't be good for the mood. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	pokecheck 2005-11-18 07:36 am UTC (link)
	But everything is porn! Everything! Chopsticks, poplin, Ghibli plushies, KFC potato wedges! I will say right now, that I am not pretending when I say I really like KFC's potato wedges. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	jaseroque 2005-11-18 12:58 pm UTC (link)
	Gh-- Gh-- --!! brain cannot cope, shuts down (Reply to this)(Parent)

monkeywrench
2005-11-18 03:17 pm UTC (link)

liking porn may just be another coping mechanism. sure men think (our boyfriends, husbands, society at large)it's "hot" if we too share in their enjoyment of porn, giving us that "cool girlfriend' position/image.

These days the only kind of porn I actively look for is guro. If I had a boyfriend now and he knew about this, he would think of me more as a "fucking scary potential rapist/serial killer" than a "cool girlfriend".

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gal_montag
2005-11-19 06:33 pm UTC (link)

I can't say as I haven't known women who went to the strip club because their boyfriend thought it was hot to buy them lapdances or were otherwise trying to be the "cool girlfriend" (these women also tend to have serious self esteem issues) but I've also known a roughly equal number who liked to go to the strip club because they like stuffing money into a girl's garter. *shrug* Goes both ways, yo.

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	sceach 2005-12-15 12:19 am UTC (link)
	"women liking porn may just be another coping mechanism" *beats head against the wall until I achieve sweet, sweet oblivion" (Reply to this)