Defending Your Constitutional Right to Wank
So, would it be crass of me to dedicate this wank to my step-uncle (or whatever he is), who just shipped out to Iraq a few days ago? Man, you join the Indiana National Guard, and it's supposed to be this cushy assignment where you don't do anything and get to be Vice-President at the end, and now he's shaking sand out of his shoes.

Anyway... On the snopes_dot_com syndicated feed (no, really!), one of their summaries sparks a wank of truly immense proportions.

Not so much talking about comment size, but it ranges all over the globe. From the Middle East, where a "heartless killing machine" called clownshoes spends his time reading LJ, to Massachusetts and the computer of caliburnis, where Marines have "no moral values," to England, where the homefront is busy with spelling wank, and back to our Marine, who's committed the old argumentative chestnut that he's over there defending our freedom of speech, dammit, so show your appreciation by not using it!

Also, all assholes and dicks are in the Army, except when someone from the Army takes exception, in which case he actually meant they're all in the Air Force.

Damn, Lee Greenwood needs to write a song about this. *sheds a single, patriotic tear*