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sequinedlizard ([info]sequinedlizard) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2006-11-02 15:54:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood:Goofy
Current music:Devo - Whip It (in my head)

Ah, kinky wank
Over at the LJ community Dot BDSM Snark 3Ravensringo, posts what is seen as a not-terribly-snarky rant about some of the younger possibly clueless members of the maybe not quite as kinky as 3Ravensringo crowd. Choice highlights include:

There's one Dominate on this list that is either a budding model or a pro, because she loaded the whole friggin' gallery with pics of herself. She's so fresh! I've never seen anything like her! Except walking through the Crack Ho section of the local shopping mall.

Then there's the "obese people turn me off" crowd. All I can say to that is this: if you eat American food, then you, too, will be obese one day. Then you can see how pretty and desirable you feel when people say shit like that. Suck my flab, you Elitist Twat.

People do not respond well to this. Apparently some community members are familiar with the scene, and giggle, kvetch, and whatnot accordingly.

Others take umbrage at perceived slights, and the wank is on. Up to 122 comments thus far.

Edited because I am a tool and was typing a bunch of different things at once... lost track of some slashes.



(Post a new comment)


[info]llama_treats
2006-11-02 10:16 pm UTC (link)
AAAGH! THE HTML!

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]sequinedlizard
2006-11-02 11:05 pm UTC (link)
Sorry sorry... was working on it, took a few minootas. Should be ok now, though, yes?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]llama_treats, 2006-11-02 11:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sequinedlizard, 2006-11-03 01:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2006-11-03 02:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sequinedlizard, 2006-11-03 03:11 am UTC

[info]darkeyes
2006-11-02 10:18 pm UTC (link)
Your formatting is completely screwed. Please fix. I wanna see the kinky wank!

.....


Wait that didn't sound quite right.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]sequinedlizard
2006-11-02 11:05 pm UTC (link)
Looks OK now for me... fixed for you?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-11-02 11:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sequinedlizard, 2006-11-03 01:11 am UTC

[info]oxydosic
2006-11-02 10:29 pm UTC (link)
All I can say to that is this: if you eat American food, then you, too, will be obese one day

So...all the skinny people in America are importing their food? That must get expensive.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]ruby_tuesday
2006-11-02 10:32 pm UTC (link)
Yup.

We get it shipped fresh from Delusional Wanker Land everyday.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]shaysdays, 2006-11-03 07:26 pm UTC

[info]sequinedlizard
2006-11-02 11:09 pm UTC (link)
That's why my grad student self has no money... stupid import taxes.

Even stupider stipending options. A part time job would help a little

(Reply to this)(Parent)


(Anonymous)
2006-11-04 03:07 am UTC (link)
No, no - we just don't eat.

Come on, get with it, in America you're either an anorexic size -2 who gets angry at the sight of a single carrot shaving and never swallows because that's extra calories, or you're a fat fat fatty fat chick wearing a party hat. There is no in between.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]luna_hoshino
2006-11-04 03:42 am UTC (link)
I must not be trying hard enough, then.

*goes off to eat a Big Mac and fries*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ruby_tuesday
2006-11-02 10:30 pm UTC (link)
Obese people are gross, though.

And if you take care of yourself, you'll never be truly obese unless you have a medical condition. You might be a little pudgy -- and there's nothing wrong with a little pudge -- but you won't be truly obese.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]llama_treats
2006-11-02 10:42 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, those stupid obese people, shoving their fat in my face. I say we make a constitutional amendment so they can't eat or get married.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2006-11-03 02:54 am UTC

[info]mindset
2006-11-02 10:44 pm UTC (link)
Oh Jesus Christ on a crutch. I hope you knew what you were doing when you posted that, right? I'm going to close this tab now, and when I reopen it in two hours, I do expect there will be some hundred comments, 90% replying to you. Have fun.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2006-11-02 10:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-11-02 10:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2006-11-02 11:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-02 11:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]quettaser, 2006-11-02 11:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2006-11-02 11:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mindset, 2006-11-02 11:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]semirecluse, 2006-11-02 11:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2006-11-03 12:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cat_mcdougall, 2006-11-03 01:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]goblin, 2006-11-04 04:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2006-11-03 11:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]squib, 2006-11-03 01:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dark_puck, 2006-11-03 02:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]esclaramonde, 2006-11-03 04:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-03 06:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]entelodont, 2006-11-03 03:04 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-03 04:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sisterelwood, 2006-11-03 08:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]luna_hoshino, 2006-11-04 03:45 am UTC

[info]ladysorka
2006-11-02 10:48 pm UTC (link)
...well, it rather depends on what you're considering obese.

Because, uh. You can very easily take care of yourself and still be medically obese. It doesn't take much to be medically obese. You're only considered "overweight" for about 5 BMI points. Normal weight ends at 24.9. You're considered "obese" once you hit 30.

Most people you think of as being "pudgy" are, most likely, medically obese. It's not exactly hard to hit that 30. You may be thinking of "morbidly obese", with is 40 and above.

*goes and gets a tissue*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ladysorka, 2006-11-02 10:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2006-11-02 10:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2006-11-04 06:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2006-11-02 10:51 pm UTC

[info]funkyhelix
2006-11-02 10:52 pm UTC (link)
Obese people are gross, though.

But how can you tell what people look like with your head that far up your ass?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2006-11-03 04:08 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-03 04:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]funkyhelix, 2006-11-03 06:21 pm UTC

[info]ashenmote
2006-11-02 11:09 pm UTC (link)
Thank you!
Even with the employment of sockpuppets and experienced scriptwriters, I wouldn't have been able to arrange for such a perfect opportunity to show of my new icon. It doesn't matter that you came to your senses, like, 10 seconds after posting it. It is still a moment of perfection.
*tears of gratitude*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cellardoor28, 2006-11-03 09:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2006-11-04 12:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]expeliarbum, 2006-11-04 03:08 am UTC

[info]herongale
2006-11-02 11:16 pm UTC (link)
Joke tip: never follow up a joke with a comment that sounds serious. It makes the joke all jealous and the joke retaliates by demanding to be taken seriously by the entire extended family of tl;dr.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]caito
2006-11-02 11:31 pm UTC (link)
RULE NUMBER ONE: NO FATTIES.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]semtex
2006-11-03 08:04 pm UTC (link)
 

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]lytabenten
2006-11-02 11:22 pm UTC (link)
Baleeted. ;_;

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2006-11-02 11:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lytabenten, 2006-11-03 01:35 am UTC
Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank...
[info]mindset
2006-11-02 11:46 pm UTC (link)
Haven't checked the comments yet, but I love this rant. Wonderful rant. Funny and wanky in one, and I've never had any desire to do "scene" ever.

"You're stoned, gothy, and you're going to use a singletail on that poor schlep?! Sweet balls of the Lemur God!"

If a singletail is what I think it is, OMFG eeeepno.

"We've got piles of "Dominates"...Is that like an ungulate with an ego problem? (G'day, I'm Steve Irwin's ghost. Today, we'll be examining the American Splay Foot Dominate! Crikey!)"

*snerkle*

"Don't even get me started on the Master GravelNuts, Lord Marquis d'Floofypants, Mistress Egomania, Lady Smacksalottaass."

And a major reason why I don't even consider scene and will no doubt forever remain french vanilla, right there. ;)

Anyway. I hope the comments live up to the promise of the OP. And, man, there's a dot_snark for everything, isn't there?


obligatory oftwank disclaimer: no comments of mine should be taken as judgement upon you, your behavior, your friends, your family, or your ex-boyfriend's sister's clone's daughter-in-law's roommate. not to be held accountable for spawned threads of tl;dr or serious business. please take in small doses, with a grain of salt, and hopefully a nice drink or chocolate. if you can read this, you don't need glasses.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - (Anonymous), 2006-11-03 01:50 am UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]darkrose, 2006-11-03 04:27 pm UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]darkeyes, 2006-11-04 04:18 am UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]mindset, 2006-11-03 06:32 pm UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]darkeyes, 2006-11-03 07:13 pm UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]mindset, 2006-11-03 09:57 pm UTC
Re: Ignoring the inhouse stuff and actually looking at the wank... - [info]sisterelwood, 2006-11-03 08:17 pm UTC

[info]smo
2006-11-03 12:39 am UTC (link)
Dominate is a verb, not a noun.

God, THANK you. That made my inner English major weep.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sequinedlizard, 2006-11-03 01:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2006-11-03 11:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sequinedlizard, 2006-11-04 03:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2006-11-04 05:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibicurmudgeon, 2006-11-04 03:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]smo, 2006-11-04 05:27 am UTC

[info]itsirtou
2006-11-03 01:32 am UTC (link)
LOL at the title of the post.

"This community vexes me! I am terribly vexed!"

(Reply to this)


[info]aerobot
2006-11-03 03:30 am UTC (link)
Okay, this is the best article known to humanity. YES. FINALLY. Complete proof that losing weight IS NOT THAT SIMPLE, DAMMIT!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]keri, 2006-11-03 08:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aerobot, 2006-11-04 01:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2006-11-04 02:02 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-04 02:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2006-11-04 03:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]luna_hoshino, 2006-11-04 03:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]funwithrage, 2006-11-04 05:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-05 06:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-05 06:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2006-11-06 01:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]big_bad_wolf, 2006-11-04 04:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2006-11-04 03:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ruby_tuesday, 2006-11-03 06:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-11-03 07:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]erototoxin, 2006-11-04 01:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2006-11-04 06:21 pm UTC

[info]brown_betty
2006-11-03 04:29 pm UTC (link)
…I'm so disappointed. I thought BDSM wank would be sexier.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]darkeyes, 2006-11-04 04:16 am UTC

[info]seiberwing
2006-11-04 03:56 am UTC (link)
What wank? I'm still browsing the comm itself even though I have to keep looking up words

(Reply to this)


 
   
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