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Lotte Claire ([info]lottelita) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-01-06 19:54:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
You know it's a hell of wank when the furries end up looking perfectly sane
[info]polyamory is usually an impressively unwanky community, especially considering that discussions frequently touch on sex, ethics, religion, and the difference between poly and swinging -- matters of no small controversy. But nothing gold can stay!

[info]darkhorseman makes a post seeking advice about his polyamorous situation. The short version is, he wants to have many lovers but is uncomfortable if his lovers have other lovers themselves. Some of his original post bears quotation, though:
I have what a friend calls “The stallion mentality” I am poly but I prefer my partners not to be. This is not a problem with my wife as she is not poly and does not mind that I am. She has no interest in anyone else but me. Now Ariana/[info]callmesilver on the other hand who is poly and prefers to have other partners. Now oddly enough I don’t as much mind the idea of her having intimacy with a friend but she wants more than that... to take it in to the area of love/being in love with someone else and it truly bothers me. I can't fully explain why though I have been meditating on it.

[snip]

Is there a… I hate to use the word sect of poly of people like me who have “The stallion mentality”

Emphasis mine. For reasons that will become clear shortly.

Community members chime in with their opinions and advice, surprisingly civilly considering that the "sect of poly" he may be looking for is most commonly found in fundamental Islam and LDS. Then, one member replies thusly:
I'm just going to say it...

Is your wife the Mare you wrote of before? Because, honestly, if your wife is a mare, really, well, that's quite different, IMO and it's fairly deceptive to come here and ask advice while leaving out a huge, major detail like that.

You see, [info]darkhorseman has a usericon that first led the community to believe he was a furry. Turns out, though, that according to posts he's made in other communities, he's a zoophile.

His "wife"? A horse.

To which the community says: Oh hell no.
[info]00goddess: Well, I have to say, that a)I do think you should see a professional counselor and b)what you are doing is not polyamory. Polyamory is, most loosely defined, consensual, ethical nonmonogamy. You are engaging in a nonconsensual sexual relationship; in effect, you are raping an animal. That is not polyamory. In fact, it is criminal as well as unethical.

[info]callmesilver: He does see a counseler. And thus the reason we never bring up the full truth of the situation, because it inevitably evolves into a damned flame war.

I've seen them together, and believe me when I say this... If she were not 'consenting', he'd be spending most of his time in the ER. Quite frankly, putting a mare in breeding hobbles with a stallion is more rape then anything he could possibly do. Consent takes many forms, is a deaf or mute person unable to consent? On a level of sheer body language, horses are much more clear in their intent then humans can ever be.

And so on, and so on. Eventually, [info]darkhorseman becomes overwhelmed with the community's negative -- but, again, amazingly civil -- response and baleets his post. More discussion in the baleetion-notification post about whether or not animals can consent to sex.

The ultimate wank, though, comes when [info]callmesilver, [info]darkhorseman's human lover, dresses the community down for their intolerance here (friendslocked but I believe the comm is open membership):
You have tossed around a bunch of he-said she-said bullshit and tried to make miserable someone who, honestly, came here looking for advice. Because of the fact that said person happens to love a horse as very much a member of our family. Fucking pathetic, if you ask me.

And to think any one of you claims to be openminded. To this, I say bullshit.

For those of you throwing around terminology like some hot-shot know-it-alls, yeah, we do love animals. To the extent of loving them in ways not necessarily deemed normal. Such as that I have raised an orphaned foal and consider her, though by no means biologically, my own daughter. I spent weeks living in a barn to be sure she'd survive. So am I therefore wrong because "she's an animal not your kid"? Nice to know. Because having an animal as a child isn't normal by most people's standards.

To extend this concept to romance, yes, it's possible to love someone romantically without having sex with them. God forbid, do you always think with your loins? Do you spend every waking minute of your seemingly pathetic lives slobbering all over everyone that you care about? Do you always fuck on the first date, too? Oh, and lemme guess, you live in a trailer park with Bubba and have three kids in diapers, right? Stereotypes work both ways you know.

[snip]

To those of you who stayed out of the flame war, you have my thanks. We were grateful for the honest opinions and ideas on how to make our situation work. And quite frankly, feel free to comment here. But I will NOT tolerate the flaming on my posts, period. You get snarky and try to throw apeshit at me and I'll delete it. End of discussion.

She makes good on her threat, and deletes several comments to her post, including one from the community's moderator telling her she's not allowed to delete comments. Bannination, naturally, ensues, and the snark, which is usually kept to an offshoot comm, is out in full force. And [info]darkhorseman says goodbye cruel internets, deleting his journal.

Anyone have any brain bleach handy?

ETA: Apparently, [info]callmesilver is now threatening to report [info]00goddess, the community's mod. Good luck with that one, hon.



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[info]yanks02
2007-01-07 10:51 pm UTC (link)
On the other hoof with my second companion she has to share the responsibilitys of my life, the finances, caring for the house, the farm, providing a good life for her child which I hope will become more and more my child as well.

ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK. Make it stop. Please.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]notjo, 2007-01-07 11:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]yanks02, 2007-01-07 11:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kelmendi, 2007-01-07 11:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]l_s_q, 2007-01-08 12:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]exdee, 2007-01-08 12:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]doc_lydgate, 2007-01-08 01:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperjackcandy, 2007-01-08 11:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2007-01-11 01:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2007-01-08 06:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-01-08 07:49 am UTC

verthandi
2007-01-07 11:01 pm UTC (link)
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


I thought the mare comment meant that she was just really ugly, like how Eleanor Roosevelt was sometimes called horse-faced. But, nooooooooo, it can't be that simple and now I really have to stifle my laughter so that my family doesn't ask what's so funny. Damn you, lottelita. Damn you for reporting that.

(Reply to this)


[info]hickorydickory
2007-01-07 11:11 pm UTC (link)
Is it wrong that I was glad we had a funny wank for once?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]singe, 2007-01-07 11:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-01-08 08:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]luvginnyarwen, 2007-01-08 12:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rikiki, 2007-01-08 01:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]khym_chanur, 2007-01-08 12:38 pm UTC

[info]dr_tristessa
2007-01-07 11:16 pm UTC (link)
This post has redeemed every Serious Business wank ever posted here.

*files wank into Special Trainwreck folder*

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]doc_lydgate, 2007-01-08 01:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 05:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dr_tristessa, 2007-01-08 02:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 03:08 pm UTC

[info]prettyveela
2007-01-07 11:30 pm UTC (link)
My friend just called me and asked me if I wanted to go see The Italian Stallion. I was like OMGWHUT?

Then I realized she was talking about the new Rocky movie.

I hate you otf_wank!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-01-08 11:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pipssister, 2007-01-11 07:52 pm UTC
This calls for an old Cowboy Song.
[info]singe
2007-01-07 11:35 pm UTC (link)
The Bucking Bronco

My love is a rider, wild horses he breaks,
But he promised to quit it all just for my sake;
He sold off his saddle, his spurs, and his rope,
And there'll be no more riding, and that's what I hope.

The first time I saw him was early last spring,
A-riding a bronco, a high-headed thing;
He laughed and he talked as they danced to and fro
He promised he'd not ride no other bronco.

My love has a gun that has gone to the bad,
Which makes all the ladies to feel very sad;
He give me some presents, among them a ring
But the return I gave him was a far better thing.

Now, all you young ladies that live on the Platte
Don't marry the cowboy who wears a white hat;
He'll pet you and court you and then be will go
And ride up the trail on another bronco.




Yippee kai yay, motherfucker.

(Reply to this)


[info]indis_earfalas
2007-01-07 11:39 pm UTC (link)
Oooooh crap. Now I KNOW I've been on the net for too long.

I shuddered on behalf of the poor horse - although I've seen stallion schlongs, and I have to say that I doubt she even notices a human one - but after that I thought to myself:

She (the human) should get rid of him. He's obviously emotionally unavailable.



Yup ... *today* I'm going outside to get some sun.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 02:36 pm UTC

[info]chili_power
2007-01-07 11:43 pm UTC (link)
I don't know why I did this but I read all the links I found and especially things like this and this just mindboggle about the fact how normally he talks about all this.

. I am in a full time relationship with 2 dedicated partners (and the occasional lover) but full time basically in the same house partners. Both demand my physical attentions on what is usually a daily basis. Most guys I know in "normal" relationships are happy with once a day or even a few times a week. Thoes who know the relationship think "damn your lucky" But Im trying to balance two here and its not easy.

I spoke with both of them. Ariana (wife2/callmesilver to clairify) Just physically atleast isnt attracted to wife1 (Sa). Sa has no problem with her being around in our more private moments but it makes Ariana unconfortable because she dosent know where to fit in.(while I could think of a few wa*smacks the bad stallion*) None of us are offended. Attraction is attraction and your cant make yourself attracted to someone or feel confortable around someone.

It makes me chant: "Horse. HORSE. He talks about a HORSE here."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ilpalazzo, 2007-01-07 11:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 12:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hangingfire, 2007-01-08 12:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 01:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]blue_penguin, 2007-01-08 07:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]doc_lydgate, 2007-01-08 02:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 02:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmikhailovic, 2007-01-12 03:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-12 04:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hyaenid, 2007-01-08 02:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2007-01-08 02:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-01-08 12:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]queencallipygos, 2007-01-08 04:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 08:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]l_s_q, 2007-01-08 12:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 12:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-01-08 03:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2007-01-08 05:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 08:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shallow_kid, 2007-01-08 12:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 12:34 am UTC
I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-01-08 01:22 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 01:28 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-01-08 02:02 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 02:05 am UTC

(Deleted post)
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]hangingfire, 2007-01-08 06:13 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]plazmah, 2007-01-08 06:20 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 02:54 pm UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]plazmah, 2007-01-08 10:34 pm UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]pet, 2007-01-08 06:30 am UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]hangingfire, 2007-01-08 05:01 pm UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 08:03 pm UTC
Re: I keep saying "Don't comment; it's all been said," but then I fail. - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 08:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seppuku, 2007-01-08 01:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 01:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thebratqueen, 2007-01-08 06:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-01-08 07:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2007-01-08 10:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-01-08 10:31 pm UTC

[info]l_s_q
2007-01-07 11:52 pm UTC (link)
My lovely horse, running through the field
Where are you going, with your fetlocks blowing in the wind?

I want to shower you with sugar lumps, and ride you over fences
Polish your hooves every single day, and bring you to the horse dentist

My lovely horse, youre a pony no more
Running around with a man on your back, like a train in the night...


That's all I've got.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-01-08 03:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]l_s_q, 2007-01-08 07:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amberwaves, 2007-01-08 04:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]l_s_q, 2007-01-08 07:55 pm UTC

[info]seldomnaughty
2007-01-07 11:59 pm UTC (link)
I just... I...

I need a drink.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]thesilentsenshi, 2007-01-08 02:39 pm UTC

[info]caito
2007-01-08 12:22 am UTC (link)
That is one ass I would not tap.

(Reply to this)


[info]ivyincubus
2007-01-08 12:24 am UTC (link)
I have to say, this is basically the best wank I've ever seen. It's sooooo full of wtf, I just love it.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]doc_lydgate, 2007-01-08 02:09 am UTC

[info]caito
2007-01-08 12:28 am UTC (link)
P.S. darkhorseman should un-delete his lj and use icons made from pictures of Daniel Radcliffe.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]blackmamba, 2007-01-08 01:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arien, 2007-01-08 08:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]blackmamba, 2007-01-08 11:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-02-01 12:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ms_katonic, 2007-01-09 12:22 am UTC

[info]sewingmyfish
2007-01-08 12:44 am UTC (link)
WILDFIRE NOOOOO!!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]blackmamba, 2007-01-08 03:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thoms, 2007-01-08 05:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-01-08 10:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]thoms, 2007-01-08 11:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-01-08 11:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]antimatterspork, 2007-01-09 12:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]thoms, 2007-01-09 02:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]miraba, 2007-01-08 11:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]suzycat, 2007-01-11 01:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]v_digitalwytch, 2007-01-09 01:13 pm UTC
GIP
[info]major_dallas
2007-01-08 01:40 am UTC (link)
Just Nooo...

(Reply to this)


[info]feloniousfeline
2007-01-08 02:23 am UTC (link)
This wank reminds me that it's been forever since I've called someone a "horse fucker".

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]chash, 2007-01-08 02:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]feloniousfeline, 2007-01-08 05:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]shutthef_up, 2007-01-08 06:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]feloniousfeline, 2007-01-08 06:48 am UTC

[info]llama_treats
2007-01-08 02:39 am UTC (link)
The old gray mare just ain't what she used to be.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]luvginnyarwen, 2007-01-08 12:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mydemand, 2007-01-09 06:59 am UTC

[info]livviebway
2007-01-08 02:58 am UTC (link)
Two things.

Anyone familiar with the play The Goat, or Who Is Sylvia? by Edward Albee? Anyone?

Also, since he's fucking the horse and not the other way around it shouldn't come to this (though I suspect a gory end to the oats on the penis thing), but does anyone remember the story in Washington DC (I think) were a guy was getting fucked by the horse and when the horse's penis swelled up it, um... To avoid getting hideous graphic here, let's just say it killed him.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]hristaesir, 2007-01-08 03:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]livviebway, 2007-01-08 08:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-01-08 03:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_void, 2007-01-08 05:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-01-08 07:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_void, 2007-01-08 04:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wickedwitch, 2007-01-08 05:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_void, 2007-01-08 06:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2007-01-08 06:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_void, 2007-01-08 07:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2007-01-08 07:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wickedwitch, 2007-01-08 08:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]isntitironic, 2007-01-08 04:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_void, 2007-01-08 06:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2007-01-08 06:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2007-01-09 03:25 am UTC
That reminds me... - redwarrior, 2007-01-10 11:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]memorycharm, 2007-01-08 08:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mrbimble, 2007-01-08 02:00 pm UTC

[info]monsley
2007-01-08 03:19 am UTC (link)
OAT-COVERED GENITALS are my new favourite brain-breaking concept.

Laughed till I cried every time anyone has mentioned it. Such fucking surreal beauty.

OAT-COVERED GENITALS. for great justice

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rabbitrabbit, 2007-01-08 04:27 am UTC

[info]shakeandbake
2007-01-08 03:35 am UTC (link)
That's disgusting, Ted.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-01-08 09:57 pm UTC

[info]ladysphinx
2007-01-08 03:42 am UTC (link)
I'd like to build a petting zoo . . .

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]spawn_of_kong, 2007-01-08 05:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ironymaiden, 2007-01-08 01:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]southerngaelic, 2007-01-08 09:10 pm UTC

[info]isntitironic
2007-01-08 03:57 am UTC (link)
I just bought a new computer, and this post was the first thing I used it to read on Journalfen.

I'm a bit surprised it still works.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]wankismyfandom, 2007-01-08 06:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sabinelagrande, 2007-01-08 08:29 am UTC

[info]coffeebun
2007-01-08 04:01 am UTC (link)
S'funny how I KNOW this should exist, it's the internet and rule 34 and all and everyone knows how anything can be found in the internet if you look hard enough (or sometimes it just pops up at you anyway), but knowing about it and actually reading and processing it is an altogether different matter.

In short, my brain have short-circuited and I shall have to infect my friends now. ;_; Curse you, otf_w!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sabinelagrande, 2007-01-08 04:23 am UTC

[info]amberwaves
2007-01-08 04:25 am UTC (link)
On the other hoof

HAHAHAHA can't stop laughing. Oh, furries, never change.

(Reply to this)


[info]tehrin
2007-01-08 04:46 am UTC (link)
If you are a zoophile and you really have such a....um..tender loving relationship with your animal, don't flaunt it on the internet. No one wants to see that shit.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2007-01-08 05:33 am UTC
OT - [info]rikiki, 2007-01-08 01:14 pm UTC
Re: OT - [info]tehrin, 2007-01-08 08:32 pm UTC
Re: OT - [info]puipui, 2007-01-09 03:45 am UTC



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