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Derivative of a simple Fuffle ([info]littlest_lurker) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-01-26 21:35:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:bathing cats, cats, petspa

So, recently a video showing a demonstration of a product known as the Cat Spa has been making it's way around the internet and gathering attention. Someone decides to post the link to Metafilter. And it gets quite the reception.



-That's horrible, cruel, and disturbing, and I laughed all the way through. I really don't like cats.

-Elpapacito, what ? You don't like that ? You obviously are not familiar with the Pedestrian Spa Chambers scattered across the West Coast. Entire families line up down city blocks to be part of the spa chamber experience. "The jets are coming!" scream the children. "I can't get out!" scream the men. "It's like an interactive bidet!" scream the grandfathers. And everybody walks home as wet and happy as acrobatic cats.

-"And crash, I'm just glad you didn't find a version with a pug in it, you anti-pugite."
A pug would just lie there and hope it drowned him.
"Blessed release!" he would think to himself.

-Cats don't like being spayed or neutered either. I don't see any of you people protesting that as cruelty.

-This would be so much better with a semi-hysterical Japanese voiceover.

-i love when people see this and say "omg i'd kill the person who..."
yeah. everytime i see someone do something violent i want to hit them in the face with a brick.
get over yourselves.

-Waterboarding for cats.
Its OK because 'they' aren't human, and is it just as 'hilarious' when they are?

-I have recently read somewhere that, a few centuries ago, they would hang live cats by the tail over a fire and kings and populace alike would laugh their heart out: this kind of show was considered an hilarious delight.
So, it could be said that suffering cats are still used to entertain, but on the suffering cat scale, we are much more civilized.

-Say your toddler needs an injection, in the butt. The kid hates injections. Are you folks going to say that you accompanying the child and coo-cooing it while it gets the shot is the same as sticking the kid into some injection-giving-robot-confinement-box?

-That cat isn't in distress. It's trying to get out by folding the fabric of spacetime itself. It's trying to get out so it can kill.
The kitty is just fine. It just hungers for human flesh.

-Seriously. The cat and waterboarding subject are both terrified because they think they're going to die. A cat DOES NOT freak out like that if he's merely annoyed.

-Actually, "waterboarding your cat" wins the award for the dumbest/most hilarious thing written on MetaFilter this week.
"Why do you keep shitting outside your litterbox?" *blurble burble blurble blurble meoooooww!*



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[info]napalmnacey
2007-01-27 11:30 pm UTC (link)
... You have a zombie cat story TOO?!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]caito
2007-01-28 02:46 am UTC (link)
Wait, you also have one? Crazy! Zombie cats must be a universal theme.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]napalmnacey
2007-01-28 03:45 am UTC (link)
Well, my brother's adorable cat Rutger (named for Rutger Hauer) sadly died via car smoosh, and we buried him in the back yard. And we don't have a dog-proof fence around our front yard. And there are dick-cheeses in our neighbourhoods that let their dogs go for wanders at night. Some digging later, my poor young nieces and nephews find Rutger half-buried, all rotted, looking as though he was trying to claw his way from the grave. His hand/paw was knotted in some ivy, so it looked really convincing. It's an on-going joke in our family now.

When my brother found out about it (he was in Japan), he cracked up. Our appreciation for humour overpowers our more painful emotions in my clan.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]caito
2007-01-28 03:54 am UTC (link)
Ahh. My zombie cat story is actually more tragic than amusing. When I got home from the first day of my last year of high school, I found a small cat seemingly stuck in the drain pipe next to the sidewalk leading from our driveway to the front door. No biggie, we live in the country, we get feral cats wandering by all the time. How the poor dear got stuck I couldn't tell, but his pathetic mews for help assured me that he wanted help more than he wanted to bite off one of my fingers, so I set to helping him.

I tried to reach in and scoop him out, but that didn't quite work. I wound up getting some vegetable oil to slick up my hand and the pipe so I could reach in and gently lift the little guy out with as little possibility of hurting him as possible.

Except when I pulled him out, I saw that he was missing all the skin off his tail, his back legs were very clearly not functioning, and his belly was already completely infested with maggots. Like, seriously, wiggling in and out of his internal organs, which were pretty much all in plain view.

I ran into the house screaming, following by a flopping kitty zombie, still mewing for attention.

We wound up wrapping the little guy up in an old towel and driving him to a local vet, who put him down as a Good Samaritan dealie.

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[info]napalmnacey
2007-01-28 05:00 am UTC (link)
Oh. That's not a funny story. That's tragic. :( Here, have some laughs from my funny story.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]catslash
2007-10-23 03:31 am UTC (link)
. . . god, I'm so glad I followed the link back to this old report.

D:

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