Industrial accident waiting to happen:

I have a friend who refuses to go in Jacuzzis. She once got sick from the bacteria in one and feels they are cesspools of evil, and though I'm not proud of it and would never do it again, I will admit that I once held my dick up against one of the jets in the one on the roof of a seriously fancy hotel and let it jerk me off until I came. I know, it's fucking so wrong in every way and so unlike me. It was ten years ago, I mean I was still 34, and I was sober, it's not like I was a drunk 16 year old so I have no excuse really I know. I don't know, LA, man, it fucks with my whole trip.

And the Jacuzzi never called back, either, that disappointing whore!