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Nomes ([info]onaga) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-03-18 22:52:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Breakupplz?
Horsefucker's human girlfriend was ignoring his mighty stallion ways...

...and she's gone!

Break out the champagne. Or the hard liquor, to cope with all the friends telling him that he's better off with horseywife alone and no bitchy (i.e. verbal) woman to get in his way.

(Thanks to [info]cookie_love for the links!)



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(Post a new comment)


[info]winterfalls
2007-03-19 08:26 am UTC (link)
My farm is my home, The farm owner is my second father and in many ways the one I never had. The horses are his children.

So by fucking the horse, he's committing incest? *Brain breaks*

(Reply to this)


[info]vassilissa
2007-03-19 09:02 am UTC (link)
*points at the thread where he and his friend are discussing anxiety/panic and OCD*
YOU! OUT OF MY DISORDER!

(Reply to this)


[info]romanesque
2007-03-19 09:44 am UTC (link)
Oh, George, not the livestock.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]spawn_of_kong, 2007-03-19 11:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lyppy, 2007-03-19 04:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2007-03-19 05:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mertonfanatic, 2007-03-19 05:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]littlest_lurker, 2007-03-19 11:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-20 11:01 am UTC

[info]stella_polaris
2007-03-19 11:53 am UTC (link)
I'm confused. I thought they were poly?

And he still thinks he got the horse pregnant? Lolololol.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cookie_love, 2007-03-19 12:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]thoms, 2007-03-19 01:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]crankylex, 2007-03-19 06:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]panthea, 2007-03-19 08:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilan, 2007-03-19 12:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]stella_polaris, 2007-03-19 12:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-20 11:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bizzle, 2007-03-19 08:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]stella_polaris, 2007-03-20 02:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]oxydosic, 2007-03-20 03:08 am UTC

[info]esclaramonde
2007-03-19 12:40 pm UTC (link)
Awwws,did the truth hurt her precous wittle feelings???

I wouldnt sweat it either way cuz bitches aint nuthin but ho's and tricks.

And if you insist on loving vagina,yur lot better off if it isnt attached to a human ;)


DO NOT WANT.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-20 12:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-20 12:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-20 01:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-20 01:31 am UTC

[info]waterfront
2007-03-19 12:58 pm UTC (link)
I'm at work! I can't read horsefucker wank!

I HAVE TO READ IT.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2007-03-20 12:10 pm UTC

[info]moiety
2007-03-19 02:17 pm UTC (link)
Tell me about it. Regardless of the actual content, I'm at -work-. Not risking having to explain that one to HR.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]antigone, 2007-03-19 06:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]v_digitalwytch, 2007-03-21 08:35 am UTC

[info]zealot
2007-03-19 04:01 pm UTC (link)
Curses. Yet another strike against my groundbreaking theory that ponyfucking strengthens relationships. There goes my senior thesis.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2007-03-19 04:41 pm UTC

[info]onyxnoir
2007-03-19 04:46 pm UTC (link)
So let me get this straight. His 'wife' is about to have a baby.foal.

And we already know that ponies turn him on.

Who's going to be watching the 'children'? Or do we need to call child services/animal cops/ASPCA?

F_W has officially broken my brain. I actually managed to type that with a straight face.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2007-03-19 06:39 pm UTC
D:D:D:D:DDDDD: - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-03-19 06:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-19 10:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackerbitch, 2007-03-19 11:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]prettypinkkitty, 2007-03-19 08:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-03-19 08:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]caito, 2007-03-20 12:24 am UTC

[info]tez
2007-03-19 04:47 pm UTC (link)
OH MY GOD. I do that silly little thing called sleep and wake up to Y HALO THAR HORSEFUCKER.

Can I call CPS? Like now? Someone get that kid into a sane household stat!

(Reply to this)


[info]twoiskewl
2007-03-19 04:55 pm UTC (link)
I think the sole thing that horrifies me more than anything else is the forthcoming man-horse love child demon that he is convinced his "wife" is pregnant with. Because yes, their love has TRANSCENDED THE LAWS OF NATURAL BIOLOGY. They are going to birth a hideous mutant pony FURRY, one that will bear an uncanny resemblance to the muscular, toned horseman found in his LJ icon. Through the unspeakably grotesque manlips spouting out of its long, pony jawline, it will speak a combination of both horsese and english, serving as the communication medium between him and his wife as they discuss long into the night what college to send darling Blackmidnight to.

What in the hell, what.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]gusty, 2007-03-19 05:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lottelita, 2007-03-19 05:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gusty, 2007-03-19 05:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-03-19 05:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-19 05:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-19 05:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-03-19 05:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-19 05:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lindentreeisle, 2007-03-19 06:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jetwolf, 2007-03-19 11:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2007-03-27 12:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2007-03-19 05:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vigilanterodent, 2007-03-19 05:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]derumi, 2007-03-19 06:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-20 11:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-19 06:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-19 06:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-19 11:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-19 11:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]anonyrat, 2007-03-20 12:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chofi, 2007-03-20 04:55 am UTC

[info]gusty
2007-03-19 04:56 pm UTC (link)
And the EVERYONE'S FETISH IS OK AND BEAAAAUTIFUL mentality of the furry community once again makes me wish for the 'sterilize people via the internet' feature to hurry up and get here. Oy.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2007-03-19 05:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]scarah2, 2007-03-19 08:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-03-20 03:43 am UTC

[info]lottelita
2007-03-19 05:01 pm UTC (link)
Wow.

I'll just be over here imagining that the girlfriend found Jesus and realized what a psycho she was dating, and left for the good of her and her child.

Yup. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

(Reply to this)


[info]plazmah
2007-03-19 05:10 pm UTC (link)
I hope the Ponyfucker drama never ends. I haven't been this entertained since the last Usagi Kou wank. And I have stocked up on enough industrail brain bleach to last me a century.

Fun Fact: I picked up Madonna's 'Confessions On A Dancefloor Tour' DVD yesterday, and the concert opens up with her dancers in S&M gear and riding crops, while images of horses plays on the video screens behind her and MY BRAIN WAS SO BUSTED. Damn you, Ponyfucker!

(Reply to this)


[info]pantyless_angel
2007-03-19 05:22 pm UTC (link)
I hope she calls the ASPCA on his ass. I know I would.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]saralina25, 2007-03-19 06:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vergilsparda, 2007-03-19 06:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pantyless_angel, 2007-03-19 08:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]saralina25, 2007-03-19 09:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2007-03-19 10:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-20 11:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]forevagreeneart, 2007-03-19 11:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-20 04:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysphinx, 2007-03-27 12:59 am UTC

[info]feenix
2007-03-19 05:35 pm UTC (link)
Well, at least there's a ray of sunshine in this entire wank:

I do honestly wish her the best and I hope she finds happiness. I hope that she can reunite with her son and settle down some place and get her life together... that place just isnt here.

So at least the kid wasn't exposed to Ponyfucker. (The human kid, not the horse lovechild.)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]chili_power, 2007-03-20 12:24 pm UTC

[info]melisus
2007-03-19 05:41 pm UTC (link)
I watched Clerks II the other day.

I should have recognized it as an omen of things to come.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sepiamagpie, 2007-03-20 12:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]melisus, 2007-03-20 12:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]makeshyft, 2007-03-20 02:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]melisus, 2007-03-20 02:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]v_digitalwytch, 2007-03-21 08:41 am UTC
FOAL, YOU'LL BE MY LOVER SOON
[info]fevered_ego
2007-03-19 06:16 pm UTC (link)
I love you so much, can't count all the ways
I've fed you sugar cubes and all they can say is
"His wife's a horse"
They never get tired of putting me down
And I'll never know when I come around
What I'm gonna find
Don't let them decide your course.
Don't you know...

Foal, you'll be my lover soon,
Please, nibble my hand
Foal, you'll be my lover soon,
Soon, you'll need a man

I've been misunderstood for all of my life
But what they're saying it cuts like a knife
"The dude's insane"
Well I've finally found the ride I'm looking for
But if they get their chance they'll end it for sure
And bleach their brains
Pony I've done all I could
Now it's up to you...

Foal, you'll be my lover soon,
Please, don't bite my hand.
Foal, you'll be my lover soon,
Soon, you'll need a man

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: FOAL, YOU'LL BE MY LOVER SOON - [info]chaos_theory, 2007-03-19 09:24 pm UTC
Re: FOAL, YOU'LL BE MY LOVER SOON - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-19 11:12 pm UTC
Re: FOAL, YOU'LL BE MY LOVER SOON - [info]hallidae, 2007-03-19 11:52 pm UTC
Re: FOAL, YOU'LL BE MY LOVER SOON - [info]makeshyft, 2007-03-20 02:16 am UTC

[info]aerinc
2007-03-19 06:18 pm UTC (link)
I can't wait till that full-blooded baby pony is born and he starts demanding paternity tests.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-19 11:14 pm UTC

[info]lindentreeisle
2007-03-19 06:22 pm UTC (link)
This is so great. We should start an annual wank awards ceremony.

And then Horsefucker would win everything.

(Reply to this)


[info]vergilsparda
2007-03-19 06:42 pm UTC (link)
But... I thought the house was HERS.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2007-03-19 09:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vergilsparda, 2007-03-19 09:15 pm UTC

verthandi
2007-03-19 06:42 pm UTC (link)
Encyclopedia Dramatica gives his alleged name and address (I'd say possible NSFW, but, well, we're all reading this wank anyway). Is this trufax or is EA blowing it out their ass again?

(Replies frozen)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2007-03-19 07:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lottelita, 2007-03-20 04:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2007-03-19 07:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - iwanttobeasleep, 2007-03-19 09:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]brown_betty, 2007-03-19 09:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blackflag, 2007-03-19 09:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - ravenousbunny, 2007-03-19 08:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - verthandi, 2007-03-20 03:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lottelita, 2007-03-20 04:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]visp, 2007-03-20 02:58 am UTC
(no subject) - verthandi, 2007-03-20 03:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kahrohseh, 2007-03-20 03:32 am UTC
(no subject) - verthandi, 2007-03-20 03:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-03-20 07:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - verthandi, 2007-03-20 07:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]keri, 2007-03-20 09:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-03-20 07:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]feenix, 2007-03-20 06:24 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladyvorkosigan, 2007-03-20 12:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]narcissam, 2007-03-20 08:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-03-20 07:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eljuno, 2007-03-20 08:12 pm UTC

[info]shadowkitty
2007-03-19 07:23 pm UTC (link)
God damn you all. I'm just after having my dinner!

(Reply to this)

i'm rofl-ing on the outside, but on the inside, i weep
pastri_archy
2007-03-19 07:54 pm UTC (link)
>_< Where is [info]ninja_stripper? I need her icons to wash away the sticky evil.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

FOR GREAT JUSTICE! - [info]ninja_stripper, 2007-03-20 04:50 pm UTC
Re: FOR GREAT JUSTICE! - pastri_archy, 2007-03-21 12:50 am UTC

[info]sadisticferret
2007-03-19 08:37 pm UTC (link)
Right. I think now would be a good time for me to swear off [info]otf_wank forever.

(Reply to this)



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