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Jenn ([info]wankaholic) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-03-25 16:37:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
So. Waiter Rant. Kind of like customers_suck, except it's only one person posting ("Waiter"), and it's usually wank-free. Usually.

The waiter that writes the blog recently started working in a new restaurant, and has become . . . slightly bitter. As a result, he posted first "50 Signs You're Working in a Bad Restaurant," then "50 Signs You're an Asshole Customer." The first doesn't garner much attention, but the second . . .

Four hundred comments later, people are still wanking over:

-Whether it's acceptable to bring your own tea (look for Desert Princess, misspelled as Dessert Princess).
-Whether it's acceptable to leave a tip on a credit card that ends in a weird amount ($2.51 on a tab for $10.49).
-If you should tip on takeout.
-If asking about the music is okay.
-Why saying that you're allergic to an ingredient in order to get it taken out of your food is evil.
-How bitter "Waiter" has become.
-What is a 'normal' tip—fifteen or twenty percent.

Namecalling and accusations of elitism abound, and perhaps 1/4 of replies become non-wanky.



Page 1 of 2
<<[1] [2] >>

(Post a new comment)

Ugh...
[info]cookie_love
2007-03-25 11:05 pm UTC (link)
O___o

...I didn't think "tea etiquette" was actually that big an issue in modern society. Are the sticks jammed that far up people's ass these days? I had no idea.

I need to get out more.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Ugh... - [info]annaham, 2007-03-26 04:55 pm UTC

[info]tangentialone
2007-03-25 11:45 pm UTC (link)
...So how would they find out if someone told the waiter they were allergic to something when they weren't? Did the customer brag about it to the other people at the table? Did the waiter purposely have it included in the food to see if they were lying?

Huh, I don't see the original list thing about take-out.

25) You claim you’re “a friend of the owner.” So what? 5000 people are operating under a similar delusion.

Hahaha. When I was volunteering at the botanical gardens, I was at the register taking entry fees and this one guy came up and started asking (I thought) "Where's my [indecipherable]? I need to see my [indecipherable]!" and I wasn't really sure what to say because as far as I knew we didn't even have a lost and found. And then it clicked that he was asking about a person whose name started with the sound "my" so I went, Oh, a person? and he said Yeah, My___, big muckety-muck at the gardens (I swear he actually said muckety-muck) so I just pointed him to the table you go if you're meeting people. I don't know if My___ was a donor or if they worked at the gardens or what.

So: Don't assume the person you're trying to impress has any idea who Big Important Person Who You Totally Know is! Especially if they're a teenage volunteer with a nametag and not a regular employee with a uniform.

(Reply to this)


[info]vengeance_bean
2007-03-25 11:50 pm UTC (link)
15% is normal. I taught all my students that it's normal. Oh god, have I led them astray?!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-26 06:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vengeance_bean, 2007-03-26 06:55 am UTC

vomitymcpuke
2007-03-26 12:29 am UTC (link)
I didn't think leaving irregular change on a tip was a bad thing! Sometimes I kinda dump my change purse out, but only if it's a generous tip, not just a few cents. I asked a waitress once and she said she didn't mind, since she needed change anyway. And I almost always even out the money on debit or credit card purchases. Whoops.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]pfeffermuse, 2007-03-26 12:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperlandgirl4, 2007-03-26 01:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 01:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2007-03-26 05:39 am UTC
(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2007-03-26 12:16 pm UTC

[info]alpheratz
2007-03-26 12:42 am UTC (link)
:( Poor mouse.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2007-03-26 01:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]damien, 2007-03-26 01:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 02:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]emiweebee, 2007-03-26 03:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mmanurere, 2007-03-26 06:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-03-26 09:14 am UTC

[info]animeg3282
2007-03-26 12:46 am UTC (link)
Off topic: why did journalfen disappear for like a day?

Also, why is bringing your own tea bags evil? Once my aunt left a dime as a tip, and then took it back, thus making me worry a lot about proper tips.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aposiopetic, 2007-03-26 01:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 02:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aposiopetic, 2007-03-26 02:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 02:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-03-26 10:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]stinksap, 2007-03-26 02:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]khym_chanur, 2007-03-26 03:58 am UTC

[info]squib
2007-03-26 12:55 am UTC (link)
I'm completely flummoxed why several of those things make you an asshole customer, particularly the tea bags and the credit card split/tip thing (15% of $100 is $15, so if each pays $50, why wouldn't $7.50 be proper?). And if it's evil to explain a health condition *and* evil to bring your own tea bags, than doing so because of a health reason must make you like the Spawn of Satan or something. Which is good, always did want to have Satan for a parent.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]stinksap, 2007-03-26 01:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]agent_hyatt, 2007-03-26 02:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]stinksap, 2007-03-26 02:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 01:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 04:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]squib, 2007-03-26 05:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]faultypremise, 2007-03-26 06:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 03:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 04:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]squib, 2007-03-26 05:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mireille, 2007-03-26 05:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-03-26 06:31 pm UTC

[info]joye
2007-03-26 01:28 am UTC (link)
Everytime I read one of these restaurant wanks, it makes me never want to go out to eat, because I'm afraid I'll do my usual "Can I have lemon and water" and they'll smile and say "Sure" while seething. And then they'll spit in my drink.
But maybe because I don't ask for sugar I'm not an asshole? Maybe I'm just an ass? (Although an ass without a hole may be worse...)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]joye, 2007-03-26 01:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperlandgirl4, 2007-03-26 01:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 02:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 02:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 03:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 03:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 03:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]joye, 2007-03-26 07:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]panthea, 2007-03-26 03:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pepperlandgirl4, 2007-03-26 05:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aposiopetic, 2007-03-26 01:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 02:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]funwithrage, 2007-03-26 12:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ladysorka, 2007-03-26 02:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]squib, 2007-03-26 05:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 07:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-03-26 06:34 pm UTC

[info]ladysorka
2007-03-26 01:55 am UTC (link)
...and here I thought tip amount varied by where you were. 20% if you're in New York or San Francisco, 15% everywhere else.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 02:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lessis, 2007-03-26 05:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ayezur, 2007-03-26 07:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lessis, 2007-03-26 09:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2007-03-26 03:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]funwithrage, 2007-03-27 12:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dommichan, 2007-03-29 08:59 am UTC

[info]sashenka
2007-03-26 02:18 am UTC (link)
Next time I eat at a fancy restaurant, I'm totally asking for a prostitute.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 03:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 03:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 03:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-03-26 05:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 05:46 am UTC

[info]ryuutchi
2007-03-26 02:33 am UTC (link)
Uhm. Who else would they ask to find out about the music, though? That's what I'd like to know.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:51 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 06:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-03-26 09:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 03:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-03-27 03:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-03-26 08:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]innominate, 2007-03-26 08:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-26 05:40 pm UTC

[info]eilisliana
2007-03-26 02:57 am UTC (link)
The thing about saying you're allergic to something so they don't add to your food? Yea, I've done that.. because there is one restaurant local to me that unless you *are* (or say you are) allergic to something, they add it to the food anyway.

Because as one waiter told me.. "That is how the food is made! If you do not eat it correct the taste... is ruined!" Uh yea, well it is my food and I don't want onions in it. :/

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]damnedfallacy, 2007-03-26 03:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]damnedfallacy, 2007-03-26 04:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]stopthatgirl7, 2007-03-26 04:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-03-26 09:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]stopthatgirl7, 2007-03-26 11:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-03-26 01:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]princessdot, 2007-03-26 05:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-26 07:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-03-26 07:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eilisliana, 2007-03-26 10:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bemysty, 2007-03-26 10:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pyrrah, 2007-03-28 03:40 pm UTC

[info]perletwo
2007-03-26 03:01 am UTC (link)
I couldn't make it through all 400+ comments, my stamina is not that great.

But I did have a Bzuh?!? moment at a complaint in the comments 'if you're wearing a red or purple hat.'

Why???? Is their money not spendy? And yes, I know about the Red Hat Society, but I've been to/seated near a few RHS meetings and I've never found them to be outrageously hootennannyish. Is there something really obvious here I'm missing?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]squib, 2007-03-26 05:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 05:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lessis, 2007-03-26 05:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]waitwut, 2007-03-26 03:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]catremistrae, 2007-03-26 05:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 05:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mmanurere, 2007-03-26 06:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 06:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lady_red, 2007-03-26 11:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mmanurere, 2007-03-27 05:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]miss_arel, 2007-03-27 04:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]hellespont, 2007-03-26 02:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]catremistrae, 2007-03-26 11:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-28 06:26 am UTC

[info]aristaea
2007-03-26 03:14 am UTC (link)
A) If your restaurant is paying $2.50/bag for tea, then you are both stupid and getting screwed by your vendor, and you could save a lot of money by having someone run to the grocery store and buy all the tea. Nice tea, even. Tea that costs $5 for a box of maybe 20 bags. That's expensive tea, and it's still only $0.25/bag.

B) I hate people who bring their own teabags, but I can understand it because I'm a tea snob, and I hate places that have crappy tea, too.

C) Fuck everyone, if I have a cup of Starbucks coffee and I come into your restaurant I am bringing the fucking coffee with me. Your coffee probably sucks and chances are it was sitting on the burner too long anyway, and you definitely cannot make me a decaf caramel soy chai latte. Hell, you can just barely do cappuccino right. You will pry my coffee from my cold, dead hands — and then I will haunt you until you give it back to me.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]perletwo, 2007-03-26 03:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-26 12:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]splorch, 2007-03-26 01:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-26 02:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]splorch, 2007-03-26 03:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 07:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rarirurero, 2007-03-26 07:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]funwithrage, 2007-03-26 12:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 02:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]funwithrage, 2007-03-27 01:00 pm UTC

[info]itsirtou
2007-03-26 03:23 am UTC (link)
2) You ask for separate checks after you’ve finished your meal.

Shit, I did not know that. When's the RIGHT time to ask for separate checks?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]itsirtou, 2007-03-26 03:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sashenka, 2007-03-26 03:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gweniveeve, 2007-03-26 03:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]defenestrate, 2007-03-26 05:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mochibuni, 2007-03-26 07:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cjk, 2007-03-26 01:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]miome, 2007-03-26 02:04 pm UTC
I couldn't help myself.
[info]gweniveeve
2007-03-26 03:40 am UTC (link)
Everyone is all, "But what's wrong with asking for the music?"

What's wrong is this: most servers aren't DJs. They have other things on their mind rather than the music. Maybe really expensive restaurants do insist that their servers be up on the music, but honestly, when I was a server (at a Mexican restaurant) I didn't particularly think about it. It's not that rude, it's just not something that the waiter is going to be concerned about.

Bringing anything of your own to a restaurant (unless it's for bona-fide health reasons) is tasteless and makes you look like a cheap-ass. Yes, tea is overpriced. But if you can't afford it, you can't afford to eat out. A restaurant is not a picnic.

People lie about allergies because they hope that their weird-ass demands will be taken more seriously. I do sympathize with those that really have allergies, however -- I can't count how many times my lactose-intolerant mother would specifically say "no cheese" but still end up with cheese. However, at some point servers start wondering why a person with so many dietary restrictions is at a restaurant which mainly serves food they can't eat. I once had people ask for "no oil" for their fajitas because they were trying to be health-conscious. Dude, fajitas. What are they without the oil?

The meticulous "adding" on checks is annoying because it seems like the person was more concerned about getting a nice round number than giving the server a tip he or she deserved. (Also, the server does not care about all their checks ending in nice round numbers -- they add up unevenly, anyway).

I'd say 15% is still normal but 20% should be given for either large checks or small checks (Don't give less than $1 even if you only ordered $4 worth of food). It's nice to leave more if you stayed at your table for awhile as well (just because the server might have gotten more if your table could have been used by others).

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]vengeance_bean, 2007-03-26 04:02 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]agent_hyatt, 2007-03-26 05:08 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-26 06:35 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]ryuutchi, 2007-03-26 06:43 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]sepiamagpie, 2007-03-26 09:56 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]solar_type_star, 2007-03-26 11:20 am UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]frequentmouse, 2007-03-26 03:16 pm UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]belafarinrod, 2007-03-26 03:21 pm UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]sadisticferret, 2007-03-26 05:22 pm UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]jat_sapphire, 2007-03-26 09:42 pm UTC
Re: I couldn't help myself. - [info]viola_dreamwalk, 2007-03-28 04:38 am UTC

[info]rosalita
2007-03-26 03:50 am UTC (link)
I have a friend who was a waiter for many years and he told me that waiters hate people who order hot tea. I saw it mentioned on this blog. Sorry, I don't drink coffee and I only order hot tea if it's on the menu. Note: On the menu. If you don't want to serve hot tea, take it off the menu or STFU.

Sorry. I'll just clean that up.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2007-03-26 04:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rosalita, 2007-03-27 12:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]seiberwing, 2007-03-26 05:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep, 2007-03-26 05:12 pm UTC
Music
[info]winterfalls
2007-03-26 05:25 am UTC (link)
If the customer was polite about it, I don't see why it's a big deal to ask about the music. Sure, customers don't expect servers to be music experts, but in a restaurant, I'll expect servers are the ones they come into contact with most often. Would servers prefer customers to ask for the manager instead?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Music - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 08:03 am UTC
You realize there's only one answer to all of this: - [info]spawn_of_kong, 2007-03-26 12:25 pm UTC

[info]brown_betty
2007-03-26 05:40 am UTC (link)
25) You claim you’re “a friend of the owner.” So what? 5000 people are operating under a similar delusion.

Hah! Yes. My favourite was when a customer said, "I didn't want to have to do this, but I know _____"

A senior waitress said, "OMG, me too!"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-03-26 12:08 pm UTC

[info]felinephoenix
2007-03-26 06:01 am UTC (link)
[my thoughts on tea, teabags, and teabagging]

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]squeakytoy, 2007-03-26 12:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annaham, 2007-03-26 05:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]squeakytoy, 2007-03-26 08:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annaham, 2007-03-26 10:04 pm UTC
Mothafuckers love their mutherfucking tea!
[info]jrs1980
2007-03-26 06:31 am UTC (link)
I've been working on reading those comments since like, four o'clock. sheesh. I'm afraid to refresh.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Mothafuckers love their mutherfucking tea! - [info]catslash, 2007-03-26 07:25 pm UTC

[info]rarirurero
2007-03-26 07:25 am UTC (link)
I come from a country where servers are paid at least minimum wage or better, and they expect 15% tips (in a large part, I imagine, because American tourists don't know that they're making $10/hour already and tip them like they would back home). So my first reaction to the list was initially 'whatever, suck it up - I've had harder, lower-paying jobs where I wasn't tipped at all'...

...Until I remembered that the waiter is American, and is probably making $2/hour. Yeah, I'd be pretty pissy if I were making that wage too, as no tip would mean that I'd just wasted my time. The customer is essentially paying the server's wage.

Is it just me, or is that system more than a little broken?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]aristaea, 2007-03-26 07:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]fauxkaren, 2007-03-26 08:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]antigone, 2007-03-26 04:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - vomitymcpuke, 2007-03-26 12:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]braska, 2007-03-26 03:41 pm UTC
lulz, tourists. - [info]antigone, 2007-03-26 04:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep, 2007-03-26 05:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]catslash, 2007-03-26 07:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep, 2007-03-26 08:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]catslash, 2007-03-26 08:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-03-26 05:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]catslash, 2007-03-26 07:31 pm UTC
jumping in... - [info]antigone, 2007-03-26 11:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lady_red, 2007-03-26 11:40 pm UTC

[info]pokecheck
2007-03-26 07:49 am UTC (link)
One of my favorite holiday memories comes from the piped-in music at the restaurant. After all, if you're eating Chinese food for Thanksgiving dinner the only truly appropriate music is country western Christmas carols.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]catslash, 2007-03-26 07:33 pm UTC

[info]damien
2007-03-26 12:46 pm UTC (link)
Hey look, his blog bashes furs.

I didn't even know they'd been mentioned on CSI until I read through the comments there.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-03-26 01:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2007-03-26 04:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]greenling, 2007-03-27 05:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2007-03-27 05:34 am UTC

[info]catslash
2007-03-26 05:39 pm UTC (link)
I was totally going to report this. I been ninja'd! D:

Heh, your report is better than mine would have been anyway.

(Reply to this)



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