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El Juno ([info]eljuno) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-04-02 13:57:00


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If milk is rape, does that make this prostitution?
The question:

Is it fair/right for a customer to order what we, at my store, call a "ghetto-latte"?

The "ghetto-latte" is ordering any size Iced Americano, with no water and half ice (This lady's drink is an Iced Venti, no water, half ice, Americano). She then takes the drink and goes to the condiments bar and adds her own half and half.


Seems reasonably simple, right?

Not something you'd expect to cause, say, a three-month, several-hundred comment long flamewar which would eventually get heated enough that comments would be closed?

Apparently, none of us know Starbucks that well.


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[info]zyna_kat
2007-04-02 11:29 pm UTC (link)
I don't drink coffee (I don't care for the taste, or the effect it has on me), so I'm not up on Starbucks terminology.

if they order an iced quad venti breve latte and you make it for them then it is an iced quad venti breve latte if they order a no water iced venti americano and add half and half at the condo bar then it is a iced venti no water americano.

What the blah blah fuck-ety blah does this mean? I'm used to ordering fine wines in restaurants, and even if they have a 24 page wine list, it's less complicated than this.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]michmatch
2007-04-02 11:41 pm UTC (link)
There are those of us with a two pot per day coffee habit that aren't up on Starbucks terminology.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


iwanttobeasleep
2007-04-03 12:04 am UTC (link)
I *think* they're basically ordering some espresso in a big cup, and adding some cream, to make it into a latte like thing.

I am a home machine barista. My drinks are all called "How much coffee/espresso, and how much milk of what kind?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]catremistrae
2007-04-03 12:10 am UTC (link)
As a recent grad with an espresso machine, my drinks are pretty much the same. "One shot, two shots, or 16 oz mug?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


iwanttobeasleep
2007-04-03 12:14 am UTC (link)
16 ounces of espresso? *bug eyes*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]catremistrae
2007-04-03 12:27 am UTC (link)
Uh, yeah. It was a rough term. I also have a 32 oz mug, and would use it to make lattes of doom.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]julesnoctambule
2007-04-03 01:13 am UTC (link)
When I was a barista, I had a regular who would order a 16 ounce cup full of espresso.

He was a runner. Good tipper, too.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]fuzzybluelogic
2007-04-03 12:44 am UTC (link)
kinda reminds me of that first season L Word episode where Shane had to go to a different coffee shop (that was Starbuckian) ahd flailed around helplessly until someone translated the whacky menu to her.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]shaysdays
2007-04-03 04:02 am UTC (link)
Hee- I remember that one! Thats is sorta how I feel at Starbucks.


With a name like Starbucks... why am I ordering in Italian?

Unrelated to the wank- I was watching Dirty Jobs tonight and they referred to a snakes' cloaca as the 'vent.' Which put Starbuck's venti in a whole new weird place for me.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ari_o
2007-04-03 04:11 am UTC (link)
When you said "fine wines" it sounded like Smoove B! :D

I love wine menus that tell you crap like the wine contains hints of leather and tobacco. Mmmmmm. Tastes like grandpa! (No I actually had that wine and it was really lovely, but I could not stop laughing about it.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]emiweebee
2007-04-03 04:15 am UTC (link)
As I have a degree in Starbuckian, allow me:

Also, the person who appears to have written this comment is an idiot.

If they order an iced, four shot, 24ounce, half-and-half latte and you make it for them then it is an iced, four shot, 24ounce, half-and-half latte if they order an iced 24ounce no water Americano (which is just espresso shots and water) and add half-and-half at the condiment bar then it is an iced 24ounce no water Americano.

I think. Like I said, whoever wrote that is a fucking idiot.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]dragonfangirl
2007-04-03 10:43 am UTC (link)
I think what he's saying is that if the person orders X drink, then X drink is X drink and that's all you can charge them for. Even if they go over to the condiments bar and add an extra ingredient that turns it into Y drink, you still can't charge them the cost of Y drink.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]munchkinott
2007-04-04 01:40 am UTC (link)
Y drink? Because Starbuckian terminology only makes sense when you're drunk. *hits cymbal with Scotch bottle*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]aposiopetic
2007-04-03 10:55 pm UTC (link)
Sort of a bizarre take on things, but maybe one of the reasons that the names for things at Starbucks can get so insanely long is that they're such a big chain but they still want customers to be able to get a reliable product with minimal fuss. It's to avoid problems created with local slang, I bet.

For example (and this is a problem that still exists, so maybe it's not the best example), if you walked into a West Coast Starbucks and asked for a blended iced latte you'd walk out with an iced latte made with 2% milk. If you asked for it on the East Coast you'll probably get an iced latte made with whole milk* that has been put in a blender, so clarification via a fairly long name would clear up the confusion.
*Because drinks are made with whole milk unless otherwise requested.

Although then again my degree's in chemistry, so I actually prefer those "omfg, look at these chemicals that they're putting in my food!" long IUPAC names to trivial names, as then you know what the fuck is going on.

Here, I'll distract everyone from my over thinking with Julia Murney acting like a dinosaur.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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