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amymccabe ([info]amymccabe) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-04-25 18:50:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Teens see Lesbian book, Father sues Library, Wank Follows (bad pun intended)
The Morning News posts this story about a Man who is suing a library $20,000 and demanding that the hiring of the library director over The Whole Lesbian Sex Book claiming: "My sons were greatly disturbed by viewing this material and this matter has caused many sleepless nights in our house."

*pauses for obvious jokes*

Readers of the article can post in response and of course some wank follows.

ETA: Washington Post has an article with a small but wanking comment section.
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[info]innsmouth_eyes
2007-04-25 10:49 pm UTC (link)
Oh man, that's just too silly. I haven't read the wank yet because the article is so funny.

>>"patently offensive and lacks any artistic, literary or scientific value,"

Well, then they have to remove everything by Dan Brown, Anne Rice and John Ringo, too. It's only fair :)

>>*pauses for obvious jokes*

..."It's that damn 'fapping' noise coming from the boys' rooms!"

>>"God was speaking to my heart that day and helped me find the words that proved successful in removing this book from the shelf," Adams stated Thursday.

"ADAMS, THY LORD COMMANDETH, SUE THE SHIT OUT OF THEM."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-25 10:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]singe, 2007-04-26 12:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-26 04:31 am UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2007-04-26 05:03 pm UTC

[info]doomsday
2007-04-25 11:08 pm UTC (link)
He's just trying to get compensated for all the lotion he's had to buy since his kids saw the book.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]thegiantsquid, 2007-04-25 11:56 pm UTC

[info]vigilanterodent
2007-04-25 11:13 pm UTC (link)
I'm just impressed at how calm that comments section is, given the topic. There're wankers, but the consensus seems to be that the guy's just after cash, which makes my heart smile.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-25 11:18 pm UTC

[info]photosinensis
2007-04-25 11:16 pm UTC (link)
I must presume he found out about the boys' horror when he saw that they were both sporting massive boners. This, of course, leads me to wonder exactly why he was even looking at his sons' crotches.

(Reply to this)


[info]mcity
2007-04-25 11:20 pm UTC (link)
Now that's a dick, hey-o!

Unfortunately, the only cocks involved were man-made.

(Reply to this)


[info]ghostmaster
2007-04-25 11:23 pm UTC (link)
I don't think 'disturbed' was the word he was looking for.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 03:22 am UTC

[info]thegiantsquid
2007-04-25 11:48 pm UTC (link)
"My sons were greatly disturbed by viewing this material and this matter has caused many sleepless nights in our house..."

I call bullshit!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 03:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-04-26 05:56 am UTC

(Deleted post)
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-26 04:05 am UTC
(no subject) - magpiggles, 2007-04-26 01:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:17 pm UTC
Incoming UHF Reference - [info]amxjm, 2007-04-26 06:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tiye, 2007-04-26 03:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]marciamarcia, 2007-04-26 10:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]monsley, 2007-04-26 10:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darkstarrie, 2007-04-27 12:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2007-04-28 05:11 pm UTC

[info]gloria_mundi
2007-04-25 11:59 pm UTC (link)
"Nobody has to read anything in a library. There's something for everybody not to like in the library, and the librarian isn't doing her job unless there's something to offend people."
- Beverly Becker, Associate Director of the Office for Intellectual Freedom, 2006.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-26 12:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-26 04:06 am UTC

[info]expeliarbum
2007-04-26 12:07 am UTC (link)
I completely agree with this man!

Two days ago, I accidentally turned the PPV porn channel and I accidentally ended up buying a movie (my index finger accidentally fell on the 'buy' button, I swear!). When I realized I made a mistake, I was so horrified I decided to watch the entire film instead of studying for my political institutions test.

Because of that accident I failed the test and now I've decided to sue my cable company. Having the option to buy porn should be illegal!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]meril, 2007-04-26 03:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]expeliarbum, 2007-04-26 04:37 am UTC
The accidental pornographer - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:13 pm UTC
Re: The accidental pornographer - [info]pantyless_angel, 2007-04-27 12:31 am UTC

[info]semirecluse
2007-04-26 12:13 am UTC (link)
For some reason that reminded me of this Fundies Say the Darndest Things post.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]caito, 2007-04-26 01:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]blue_penguin, 2007-04-26 02:33 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-04-26 05:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jira, 2007-04-26 07:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-04-26 09:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - ealusaid, 2007-04-26 02:58 am UTC
(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 03:19 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]okalintu, 2007-04-26 03:46 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]saralina25, 2007-04-26 04:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2007-04-26 05:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]coffeebun, 2007-04-26 05:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2007-04-26 03:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tunxeh, 2007-04-26 02:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]caffeine_fairy, 2007-04-26 11:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-26 12:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2007-04-26 02:52 pm UTC

[info]ryuutchi
2007-04-26 12:20 am UTC (link)
It amuses me that my local library system has three copies and they're all missing.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]xturtle, 2007-04-26 02:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tangentialone, 2007-04-26 03:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nekoneko, 2007-04-26 04:05 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-26 04:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-04-26 09:46 am UTC

[info]hallidae
2007-04-26 12:48 am UTC (link)
::snickering like a twelve-year-old:: He should just be glad he didn't have to be the one to explain how it works between two girls. I still remember the completely gobsmacked look on my dad's face when eight-year-old me asked about it.

(Reply to this)


[info]blackjackrocket
2007-04-26 01:22 am UTC (link)
He added that "any effort to reinstate the book will be met with legal action and protests from the Christian community."

I'd be interested in hearing what sort of legal grounds they'll try to dig up on this one. Last I checked, having a sex book in a library wasn't illegal.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-04-26 06:01 am UTC

[info]makeshyft
2007-04-26 02:06 am UTC (link)
**sighs**

Yes folks.. this is the State I live in..

**singing**

And these are the wanks I'm given!

Let the boys read their porn!

'Cause we all love les-be-e-ins!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2007-04-26 06:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-04-26 06:39 pm UTC

[info]taktuk
2007-04-26 02:41 am UTC (link)
Too few of those people understand the concept of proof-reading. It makes me sad. I mean, damnit, people - if you're going to spew bigoted bile and hatred, at least have the decency to proof-read.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cjk, 2007-04-26 10:52 am UTC

[info]blue_penguin
2007-04-26 02:55 am UTC (link)
You know, I'd try to say something witty about all this, but I don't think anything I say could top this bit from the second article:

How the book was found in the military section (don't ask!) and exactly what kind of "sleepless nights" it caused (don't tell!) remains a mystery.

(Reply to this)


[info]tangentialone
2007-04-26 03:38 am UTC (link)
Disturbed... IN THEIR PANTS!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:09 pm UTC

[info]okalintu
2007-04-26 03:41 am UTC (link)
What the father obviously means is:

"My horny teenagers were reading lesbian porn and when I caught them, they made up a stupid lie about military academics because lesbians = bad. In the following nights I was constantly disturbed by both the sounds that came from their room and my own thoughts about hot lesbian sex. I don't want to admit either of those facts, so following the great example of my sons, I lie about everyhing in order to get money out of it."

That being said, damn that's amusing.

(Reply to this)


[info]luthe
2007-04-26 03:47 am UTC (link)
Why do they have to be hating on an awesome book on lesbian sex? *owns a copy* Couldn't they have found a crappier book to whine about?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]kannaophelia, 2007-04-26 10:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kannaophelia, 2007-04-26 03:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2007-04-26 03:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sadisticferret, 2007-04-26 04:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2007-04-26 02:54 pm UTC

[info]viralmemory
2007-04-26 04:03 am UTC (link)
Why are there people saying that "it doesn't matter how the boys got the book"? That really does not compute. Even at 14 and 16, surely there is still free will, right? The evil leftist liberal types didn't cunningly stash the lesbian sex textbook to try and ensnare perfectly innocent teens into the web of evil and sin? Honestly.

The library also has books about clowns. Are they okay because no parent has ever burst into their teenager's room and caught them in the floppy shoes and lightbulb nose? BTW, three honks on the bicycle horn means 'just a minute, mom!'

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 04:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-26 04:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2007-04-26 05:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]plazmah, 2007-04-26 02:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2007-04-26 06:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amxjm, 2007-04-26 06:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]annabelle_lee, 2007-04-26 06:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jira, 2007-04-26 07:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-28 04:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]gobsmacked, 2007-04-26 03:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-26 12:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]julesnoctambule, 2007-04-26 06:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-26 12:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rimrunner, 2007-04-28 05:02 pm UTC

[info]athy
2007-04-26 04:19 am UTC (link)
Mike Toreno wrote on April 22, 2007 1:06 PM:"I think everyone is giving this book a pass much too easily. How can you tell if it's tolerable or not unless you READ THE BOOK? That is why I, purely in the spirit of disinterested research, have reserved the book at my own local library, so that I may evaluate it myself."

For the common good!!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 04:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]athy, 2007-04-26 04:35 am UTC
(no subject) - pastri_archy, 2007-04-26 04:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-26 12:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2007-04-26 05:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]athy, 2007-04-26 05:27 pm UTC

[info]wrongly_amused
2007-04-26 06:28 am UTC (link)
How the book was found in the military section (don't ask!) and exactly what kind of "sleepless nights" it caused (don't tell!) remains a mystery.

Alright, Washington Post, that's enough punning for you. Off to your room without supper!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]yattara, 2007-04-26 03:40 pm UTC

redwarrior
2007-04-26 05:09 pm UTC (link)
If they really were "traumatized" by it, I can say only one thing:

They wouldn't have been traumatized if they had found a Gay Male Sex book. >D

(Reply to this)


[info]mistressrenet
2007-04-27 01:29 am UTC (link)
Dude, I don't think anything in the wank will be as funny as that summary.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]amymccabe, 2007-04-27 11:23 pm UTC
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