I'd like to see Blackironcrown try his/her grandious visions of the day he/she will send a cashier to prison for 30 days for merely touching them on the charge that is is assualt and battery.

The first arriving police officer would be like "... Are you serious?"

And if it got to court, assuming the judge isn't a nutter, blackironcrown might be the one leaving with a rebuke for wasting the court's time.