What's Latin for "wank"?
I guess you could say that this is from the Jesus fandom. One of the two recent pieces of news out of the Vatican that pissed off most of the planet was that individual priests will be free to celebrate the Tridentine Mass whenever they damn well please. The Tridentine Mass is the Latin service used worldwide by all Catholics from the 16th century until about 1970. The structure of the service itself is different, not just what language it's celebrated in.

(Full disclosure: Yes, I am one of those whackjobs who attends this kind of Mass.)

Well, this has caused such global waves of wank in the press and on the Internets that the entire planet is red and sore by now. I have many examples, but my favorite so far has got to be this innocent-looking article from Indianapolis. All would have been well...if this paper didn't have forums attached to every article.

"A dead language for a dead god. How appropriate," one commenter said oh-so-cleverly. And...they're off! Catholics aren't Christians! Protestants don't understand history! Anyone who believes in God is a fucking moron! Pedophile priests! FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER!!!!11

I'd pick out highlights, but really...there's too much here.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

	hearsawho 2007-07-19 01:40 am UTC (link)
	So I guess an altar boy holding up cue cards in the back is right out, then? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	doomsday 2007-07-19 01:44 am UTC (link)
	I think I love that idea. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crickets 2007-07-19 02:31 am UTC (link)
	Now that is how you do a fake HP spoiler icon. All the others I've seen have just ticked me off a bit. (Which I suspect was probably part of the intent.) Excellent! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	doomsday 2007-07-19 02:40 am UTC (link)
	I know! It cracked me up. It's from here. They're all totally fake spoilers, and some of them are pretty funny. I haven't looked at the comments, though, so no guarantee of spoiler safety if you scroll down past the icons. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crickets 2007-07-19 03:01 am UTC (link)
	Sweet! Thanks for the link. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	littlest_lurker 2007-07-19 07:33 am UTC (link)
	Oh those are excellent. Thanks for the link! (Reply to this)(Parent)

	grrliz 2007-07-19 02:17 am UTC (link)
	I'd go to church more often if that's how it was. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	snarkivist 2007-07-19 02:53 am UTC (link)
	We already have that. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	hearsawho 2007-07-19 03:00 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, but the poor elderly priests! "NEEDS BIGGER FONT PLZ." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	snarkivist 2007-07-19 03:36 am UTC (link)
	Maybe you could blow that up to poster-size. My missal is really small, and somehow has 1000 pages. Print is tiny, too. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	zaganthi 2007-07-19 11:26 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, but that's what hard core rote memorization is for. To the point that if one aspect of mass gets shifted around, everyone in church loses their rythym. It's something that has to be seen to be understood, but it's hilarious to watch people forget when to sit and when to stand because Visiting Priest does things minutely differently. (Reply to this)(Parent)

(Read comments) -