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Schuldig ([info]schuldig) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-09-08 23:50:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:body parts, useless facts

I'm posting this short wank piece simply because of the surrealness of it all. It also contains no references to rape or injured children, which is always a plus in this comm, right?

The members of Useless Facts argue about how many noses a mythical man has.

A taster:

"(Clarification for those who failed reading comprehension: kids tend to assume that he has all 365 noses on the last day of the year, because there are 365 days left in the COMING year... but he only has ONE nose on the last day... which is the ONLY day of the year he appears in public. KTHXBYE!)"
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(Post a new comment)

There's a simple way to resolve this controversy...
[info]jetamors
2007-09-08 04:13 pm UTC (link)
Hey Vegeta, how many noses does this guy have?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]harrylovesron, 2007-09-08 04:38 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - redwarrior, 2007-09-08 06:05 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]harrylovesron, 2007-09-08 09:56 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-09-08 06:43 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]harrylovesron, 2007-09-08 09:56 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]eso_si_que, 2007-09-09 06:34 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]harrylovesron, 2007-09-09 06:37 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-10 12:47 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2007-09-08 11:31 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-08 11:53 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-09-09 12:08 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]anonyrat, 2007-09-09 01:17 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-09-09 01:32 am UTC
GAH! Typos. >:( - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 02:40 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]littlest_lurker, 2007-09-09 06:28 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 12:41 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]harrylovesron, 2007-09-09 01:22 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-09 01:47 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 02:33 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]altoidsaddict, 2007-09-09 04:24 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 06:12 am UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-09 05:35 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]altoidsaddict, 2007-09-09 05:38 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]eso_si_que, 2007-09-09 06:31 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]felinephoenix, 2007-09-10 03:58 pm UTC
Re: There's a simple way to resolve this controversy... - [info]eso_si_que, 2007-09-10 11:59 pm UTC

[info]omega
2007-09-08 04:17 pm UTC (link)
Wank that made me lol? On otf_w? WHERE IS THIS WORLD COMING TO!

(Reply to this)


[info]pantyless_angel
2007-09-08 05:05 pm UTC (link)
What about leap years?

....It would really suck for this guy if he caught a head cold at the beginning of the year.

(Reply to this)


[info]seiberwing
2007-09-08 05:06 pm UTC (link)
Next time people say we don't go after the strange and funny anymore, I'm pointing them to this.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jyuu, 2007-09-12 07:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seiberwing, 2007-09-12 07:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jyuu, 2007-09-12 08:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seiberwing, 2007-09-12 11:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jyuu, 2007-09-12 11:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]seiberwing, 2007-09-13 12:21 am UTC

[info]napalmnacey
2007-09-08 05:23 pm UTC (link)
readysteadystop and alekhi are *great*!

alekhi: Oh, lighten up.
readysteadystop: LIGHTEN UP? I MADES TEH FUNNY, BI-YATCH!

(Reply to this)


[info]dreamer_marie
2007-09-08 05:33 pm UTC (link)
Which reminds me of the song my Dad used to sing to us when we were kids:
I'm so happy, so happy,
That my nose is in the middle of my face and not on the side...
/personal anecdote

(Reply to this)


[info]shinga
2007-09-08 05:39 pm UTC (link)
AHAHAHAHAHA. This is classic.

(Reply to this)


[info]sashenka
2007-09-08 05:52 pm UTC (link)
And every 365 posts, OTF_W has something worth laughing at.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]lady7jane, 2007-09-08 07:32 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2007-09-08 05:57 pm UTC (link)
Lighten up. Lighten Up. LIGHTEN UP, motherfuckers, or I will LIGHT you UP!</b>

OTF is le funny? GASPS. it 'tis the end of the interwebs. we were all fooled by the false prophecies of potterdamerung! In fact this is the true sign of the coming wankocalypse.

--Banah, who is officially eighteen as of three hours ago and can finally comment on JF. <3 Also, she only has one nose every day of the year.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-09-08 06:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-09-08 06:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]isobelsomething, 2007-09-08 06:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]deliciouschaos, 2007-09-08 07:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sepiamagpie, 2007-09-08 07:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dreamer_marie, 2007-09-08 08:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]damien, 2007-09-08 10:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]saralina25, 2007-09-09 12:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wanktastic, 2007-09-09 05:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-09-09 05:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 06:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rosehiptea, 2007-09-09 05:58 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-09-10 06:57 pm UTC

[info]shakeandbake
2007-09-08 06:02 pm UTC (link)
I don't think you get it.

No. I don't think you get it.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]dandywolves, 2007-09-08 10:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-08 11:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dandywolves, 2007-09-08 11:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaimonkey, 2007-09-11 04:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dandywolves, 2007-09-11 05:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaimonkey, 2007-09-11 05:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dandywolves, 2007-09-11 02:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jetamors, 2007-09-09 10:00 pm UTC

[info]themadmermaid
2007-09-08 06:03 pm UTC (link)
Well, I'm personally convinced now as to the stupidity of small children. What an excellent argument!

(Reply to this)


redwarrior
2007-09-08 06:04 pm UTC (link)
That's just...weird.

I think the nose-man is like one of those ethical problems. You know, where a kid whose parents had syphillis and was the fifth in their family should be aborted, and, if you say yes, you end up killing Beethoven?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]gynocrat, 2007-09-08 10:35 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2007-09-09 05:57 am UTC
^_^; - [info]gynocrat, 2007-09-09 02:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-09-09 02:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ilpalazzo, 2007-09-11 10:36 pm UTC

[info]tehrin
2007-09-08 06:16 pm UTC (link)
Does he grow an extra nose for leap year?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]hitchhiker42, 2007-09-08 06:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]moljn, 2007-09-08 08:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]moljn, 2007-09-08 08:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 12:47 am UTC

[info]idiom
2007-09-08 06:17 pm UTC (link)
So he goes from having one nose to 365? That's got to be uncomfortable.

(Reply to this)


[info]soupspooks
2007-09-08 06:20 pm UTC (link)
Gives new meaning to the words, "Hang on honey, I have to make up my face."

(Reply to this)


[info]tehrin
2007-09-08 06:33 pm UTC (link)
I want a fanfic about this nose man! What does he do on his one night of the year out in public! Is he looking for true love? Does he pick up on ladies/men? Do they spend the night over only to turn over in the morning and discover a man with 365 noses laying next to them?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-09-08 06:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-09-08 08:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-09-08 10:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-09-08 11:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 12:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]barankhy, 2007-09-09 06:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-09-08 06:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]darthmaligna, 2007-09-08 07:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-09-08 07:36 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]scarah2, 2007-09-08 08:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2007-09-08 11:57 pm UTC

[info]daylightsparks
2007-09-08 07:24 pm UTC (link)
Man, Catalan culture is weird. They've also got that whole thing with the Christmas poo.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]atalantapendrag, 2007-09-08 07:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]magnolia_mama, 2007-09-08 07:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2007-09-08 07:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]trisandrockets, 2007-09-08 07:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-09-08 08:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]trisandrockets, 2007-09-08 09:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-09-09 06:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]trisandrockets, 2007-09-09 07:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]risha, 2007-09-08 08:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2007-09-08 08:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]billymasqets, 2007-09-08 11:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 12:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lcsbanana, 2007-09-09 08:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]queencallipygos, 2007-09-10 06:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2007-09-08 11:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rogue, 2007-09-09 09:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-09-09 02:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]shakeandbake, 2007-09-09 09:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]queencallipygos, 2007-09-10 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - redwarrior, 2007-09-10 08:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]princessjessia, 2007-09-12 05:42 am UTC

[info]irised
2007-09-08 09:57 pm UTC (link)
Oh god. I loved it. It's like a comedy skit. It's like a version of Who's On First that's actually funny*.



*although I prefer multitudinous noses to baseball and Abbott & Costello kind of make me want to smash through walls with my head, so, I may be biased.

(Reply to this)


[info]spacelogic
2007-09-08 10:22 pm UTC (link)
I love this wank and want to marry it. That is all.

(Reply to this)


[info]gynocrat
2007-09-08 10:33 pm UTC (link)
How are you going to tell me to re-read something I've already read many times and commented on as "unclear?" The arrangement of your clauses made this difficult for formulaic readers to comprehend.

It seems kids aren't the only dumb ones here.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]dreamer_marie, 2007-09-09 12:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2007-09-09 05:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dreamer_marie, 2007-09-09 05:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2007-09-09 09:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]dreamer_marie, 2007-09-09 09:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-11 01:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rachel_pi, 2007-09-09 10:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2007-09-10 12:26 am UTC

[info]danceswithelvis
2007-09-09 12:10 am UTC (link)
Well, I have to admit this is perhaps the oddest wank I've seen. What next giant isopod wank? *shudder* Those things give me the willies!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-09-09 12:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2007-09-09 02:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2007-09-09 03:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]khym_chanur, 2007-09-09 01:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 02:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2007-09-09 02:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]danceswithelvis, 2007-09-09 02:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]isntitironic, 2007-09-09 03:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]onyxnoir, 2007-09-09 05:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]touchofstrange, 2007-09-09 05:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]daylightsparks, 2007-09-09 08:55 pm UTC

[info]chibikaijuu
2007-09-09 12:12 am UTC (link)
Wait... if he has as many noses as there are days left in the year and he's wandering around on New Year's Eve, like, at night, wouldn't he have no nose, because there aren't any days left?

Am I thinking about this too hard?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]puipui, 2007-09-09 12:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kaen, 2007-09-09 01:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2007-09-09 01:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]damien, 2007-09-09 08:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sharps, 2007-09-09 01:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vito_excalibur, 2007-09-09 09:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2007-09-09 09:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2007-09-11 07:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]coyotegirl, 2007-09-10 04:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]frenzy, 2007-09-10 03:12 am UTC

[info]tangentialone
2007-09-09 01:20 am UTC (link)
Wow, what crawled up [info]readysteadystop's ass and died?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jat_sapphire, 2007-09-09 01:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]themadmermaid, 2007-09-09 03:56 am UTC

[info]elysian
2007-09-09 01:24 am UTC (link)
The arrangement of his noses makes him difficult for formulaic children to comprehend.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2007-09-09 01:48 am UTC

anaerobica
2007-09-09 02:42 am UTC (link)
This wank is beautiful. :,)

(Reply to this)
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