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Dan Fogelberg's ([info]llama_treats) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2007-09-24 14:43:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:frosting, icing, it is not a waste of butter and sugar, uk

If I knew you were wanking, I'd have iced a cake
Over in [info]hp_britglish, schemingreader makes the mistake of asking what the stuff you spread on top of a cake is called. Hint: It ain't "frosting".

[info]oncelikeshari thinks that butter icing is evil and wrong and should be stopped, or that it doesn't exist. I'm not entirely sure.

Either way, I want cake. :(

Short, but sweet.


(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]innocentsmith
2007-09-25 07:10 am UTC (link)
schemingreader BELIEVED IN THE FROSTING, THE SWEET GOOEY STUFF THAT YEAR BY YEAR INCREASES OUR WAISTLINES. IT WANKS US NOW, BUT THAT'S NO MATTER - TOMORROW WE WILL EAT FASTER, STRETCH OUT OUR SPANDEX PANTS FURTHER - AND ONE FINE MORNING ---

SO WE FROST ON, SPREADERS AGAINST THE CRUMB, FILLING BACK CEASELESSLY INTO THE JAM.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]puipui
2007-09-25 07:16 am UTC (link)
DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE SING? SINGING THE SONGS OF FROSTED CAKES! SINGING THE BALLAD OF A PEOPLE WHO MUST FROST THE THINGS THEY BAKE!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]innocentsmith
2007-09-25 07:44 am UTC (link)
I KNOW FROSTING'S THE GREATEST,
BUT THIS WANKER'S A RECIPE-SADIST,
SO I CAN'T USE SUGAR OR BUTTER, OR THAT STUFF FROM A CAN...
STILL THAT FROSTING'S DELICIOUS,
WELL, IF NOT, IT'S NOT HALF SO VICIOUS,
AND I DREAM OF A CAKE
WHERE I COULD FROST ICING AT LAST...

A SPONGE CAKE OF OUR OWN
A CAKE PLATE OF REAL CHINA
A MIXER AND A SPATULA
BEATERS SOAKING IN THE SINK...!
A COOLING RACK SO STURDY
AND AN EGG-BEATING MACHINE,
IN THE KITCHEN THAT WE SHARE,
SOMEWHERE FROSTING'S GREEN!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

I love you. Marry me. Seriously.
[info]puipui
2007-09-25 08:12 am UTC (link)
FROSTING! UNADULTERATED FROSTING! FOR YOUR CAKES, YOUR BUNS, YOUR SWEETIES! LET'S JUST SAY... I'LL FROST IT ALL!

EVERY LITTLE CAKE HOWEVER SMALL! MAKES ME WANT TO FROST THEM, ONE AND ALL! WITH SIMPLE BUTTER FROSTING! THERE'S A STRANGE EXHILARATION! IN SUCH TOTAL BUTTER-ATION! IT'S SO PURE, SO STRONG!

THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT HARDENS FAST, STILL WITH TUPPERWARE IT JUST MIGHT LAST! AND I WILL BE EATING, EATING FROSTED CAAAAAAKE! MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]innocentsmith
2007-09-25 08:38 am UTC (link)
SONDHEIM MEDLEY:

SOME PEOPLE CAN GET A THRILL
USING JAM AS A LAYER CAKE FILL
THAT'S PERFECT FOR SOME PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIKE BUTTERCREAM!
BUT I!
WOULD RATHER EAT PIE!
WHEN I THINK OF ALL THE CUPCAKES I HAD TO FROST AND
ALL THE BOSTONS I HAD TO CREAM
ALL THE ALASKAS I HAD TO BAKE AND
HEY GANACHE, I'M COMING YOUR WAY!

AGONY! BEYOND POWER OF SPEECH
WHEN BOILED FROSTING'S WHAT YOU WANT
BUT YOU'VE GOT ONLY CHERRY OR PEACH

STILL, NO MATTER THE ICE,
I NEVER FROST ANYTHING TWICE.

SOONER OR LATER THAT CAKE WILL BE MINE,
SOONER OR LATER RICH FILLING IS FINE,
BABY, IT'S TIME THAT YOU FACED IT:
I ALWAYS GREASE MY PANS.

I FEEEEEEEL YOU, BANANA BREAD...!

NOT A CAKE GOES BY,
NOT A SINGLE CAKE!...
BUT IT'S SOMEHOW A PART OF MY THIGHS
AND IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'LL STAY
AS THE DAYS GO BY...!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]puipui
2007-09-25 11:08 am UTC (link)
OMG you win. I surrender! You have won everything ever! Go you! XD

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]innocentsmith
2007-09-25 07:48 pm UTC (link)
Ooh, I've always wanted an everything ever. Thank you!

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]negativecosine
2007-09-25 07:36 pm UTC (link)
*sob*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]innocentsmith
2007-09-25 07:49 pm UTC (link)
*pat pat pat* I'm sorry.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Gracious! This is all so sudden!
[info]negativecosine
2007-09-25 07:52 pm UTC (link)
Also now I have Johanna stuck in my head. Not that I mind, but my roommate sure does.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]mockaholic
2007-09-27 03:46 am UTC (link)
.............♥

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sparkysrevenge
2007-09-25 07:53 am UTC (link)
Ok, I think I just LOST IT when I saw that one.

*rolling in the floor*

*hands iced!internet*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]kumquat_of_doom
2007-09-27 05:56 pm UTC (link)
Oh God.

I love you all.

WITH ICING (ICING, DAMNIT!) ON THE TOP.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]hangingfire
2007-09-25 07:22 pm UTC (link)
YES, THE NEWSPAPERS WERE RIGHT: ICING WAS GENERAL ALL OVER IRELAND. IT WAS ICING EVERY PART OF THE DARK CENTRAL PLAIN, ON THE TREELESS HILLS, ICING SOFTLY THE BOG OF ALLEN AND, FARTHER WESTWARD, SOFTLY ICING THE DARK MUTINOUS SHANNON WAVES. IT WAS ICING, TOO, EVERY PART OF THE LONELY CHURCHYARD ON THE HILL WHERE MICHAEL FUREY LAY BURIED. IT LAY THICKLY ICED ON THE CROOKED CROSSES AND HEADSTONES, ON THE SPEARS OF THE LITTLE GATE, ON THE BARREN THORNS. HIS SOUL SWOONED SLOWLY AS HE HEARD THE ICING FALLING FAINTLY THROUGH THE UNIVERSE AND FAINTLY FALLING, LIKE THE DESCENT OF THEIR LAST END, UPON ALL THE LIVING AND THE DEAD.

(I am going straight to hell for that.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)

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