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	julesnoctambule 2007-12-05 08:32 pm UTC (link)
	I'd be slightly more appalled by people not knowing how to whip cream if I hadn't once had to walk a friend through preparing condensed soup on her own. That's right -- soup out of a can. The kind with directions on the label. Apparently, something about being able to add milk or water was just too much for her. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	llama_treats 2007-12-05 08:37 pm UTC (link)
	Perhaps she thought that "condensed" meant it would get bigger when she opened it? I got nothin'. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-05 08:47 pm UTC (link)
	She wasn't sure if milk or water was what she should add as the label said she could use either but didn't indicate what would happen if she chose one over the other. I eventually got her to the point of being able to make a basic cream sauce from scratch and we were both very proud. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	wrongly_amused 2007-12-06 12:44 am UTC (link)
	At least yours asked. I have both a family member and a friend who just drink it straight out of the can. :-( (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	vzg 2007-12-06 02:10 am UTC (link)
	That sounds disgusting. D: (Reply to this)(Parent)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-06 02:47 am UTC (link)
	hurgh (Reply to this)(Parent)

	hallidae 2007-12-06 03:38 am UTC (link)
	::hurk:: Didn't the lethal saltiness clue them in? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wrongly_amused 2007-12-06 05:32 am UTC (link)
	...Did I mention that they actually LIKE it cold? ;-; (Reply to this)(Parent)

	sequinedlizard 2007-12-06 04:30 am UTC (link)
	Thank you - my tongue is now trying to crawl back down my throat at the thought of that much thick glurgy saltiness. I was going to go get a snack to nibble while grading, I think I've been purged of that desire for a bit. -points to icon- Torak agrees. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	catslash 2007-12-07 01:24 am UTC (link)
	Oh my god. You know that D: emoticon? My face actually did that just now. (Reply to this)(Parent)

queencallipygos
2007-12-06 07:57 pm UTC (link)

True story time:

When I was in Junior High, we had a girl in our circle who was rather dim. A couple of us were at her house once, and she said she was going to make tomato soup for us; she disappeared into the kitchen. About fifteen minutes later, she called into the living room: "guys? Could someone come in here a second?" We went in, to find her staring befuddled at a saucepan on the stove, with the congealed lump of canned tomato soup still quivering in the pan, the bottom sizzling a little ominously. She pointed at it and asked us, "how long before it starts to melt?"

We actually had to point to the instructions written on the label before she believed us when we said she had to actually add something to the soup.

Punch line: She was the salutarian of my graduating high school class. I still don't know how.

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	vito_excalibur 2007-12-06 08:05 pm UTC (link)
	Test-taking skills: less application to the real world than you'd think. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-06 11:09 pm UTC (link)
	My little sister: She can design custom clothing without a pattern based on a picture you show her or a fabric swatch you bring to her. She also once burned a pot of water. Water. Nothing else. Did I mention she was in her 20s at the time? She's clever, but far too easily distracted to be allowed to use the stove on her own. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	redwarrior 2007-12-06 08:03 pm UTC (link)
	That reminds me- one time in the supermarket I saw a "Green Bean Casserole Kit" for sale. It was a can of cream of mushroom soup and a can of Durkee onions which read "JUST ADD GREEN BEANS". I mean, how dumb can you be when you can't make green bean casserole wihtout a kit? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-06 11:06 pm UTC (link)
	I saw frozen, pre-cooked-and-mashed potatoes and frozen, pre-cooked rice at the store this week. I think there comes a point where people who can't or who, more likely, refuse to learn how to cook certain basic things shouldn't get to eat them. I can understand buying those things hot and prepared in a restaurant/meals-to-go type place, but frozen? Oh, hell no. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-06 11:07 pm UTC (link)
	Also, pre-sliced bagged apples. NO. If you are too lazy to slice a damned apple, you deserve not to eat one. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	catslash 2007-12-07 01:29 am UTC (link)
	I personally am appalled by pre-diced onions. However, I do think that people who use them get precisely what they deserve, because how can there possibly be any flavor left? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-07 01:55 am UTC (link)
	Isn't that the truth! I guess some people are willing to sacrifice taste, nutrition and texture for the appearance of putting less effort into life. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	ladyvorkosigan 2007-12-07 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	My roommate's old roommate didn't understand how to cook pasta. She finally learned, but was always really annoyed that the angel hair pasta she cooked turned into much and would not believe my roommate when she suggested that perhaps she should bring the water to a boil first. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	julesnoctambule 2007-12-07 10:06 pm UTC (link)
	That's. . .I mean. . .how does she walk and breathe at the same time? (Reply to this)(Parent)

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