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shaysdays ([info]shaysdays) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-03-02 17:14:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:duck-billed fire-breathing dragon, fun with fundies, ideas for pokemon

Dinosaur Wank- Big, Old, and No One's Really Positive What Happened
Okay, so someone links to a relatively cute article about the Top Ten Myths About Dinos on a science forum. (Myth 1, Dinosaurs coexisted with humans, Myth 7, Dinosaurs were slow and sluggish animals, etc.) Right off the bat, someone starts in on 'evangelicals' probably not accepting #1, thus sending out some sort of subsonic signal across the internet for everyone with a bible and black helicopter fetish to show up and proclaim they are really the sane ones, really truly.

jteamjohn kicks off the WTFery with, Why don't you try to understand if what "evangelicals" believe may be true since almost anything we know about what happen to the dinosuars is myth or unexplainabe. I believe in my heart that dinos and man where here together. It is because of evidence that I have studied leads me to this belief. I believe man saw dinos becasue one of them wrote about them, Job.

Aaand they're off.

Is the Bible a peer-reviewed document?
Didn't I see cave drawings of 'dinasaurs' and man together?
Um, carbon dating is like guessing and therefore science is faith-based so haha, suck it, scientists*!
Did you know hippos don't have tails that look like trees? That means the Bible mentioned dinosaurs!
Dinosaurs and people lived together in a vegetarian utopia but I await your ignorant responses**!
You know, if I put what you "believe" in "quotes," it makes me look more "right."
Well, I was taught about Pluto, but now there's no planet Pluto, so science must have erased it!

And that's just page one and two. It goes on to name-calling, off-kilter assumptions about people of faith, a random quote by Pliny about Vesuvius from out of nowhere, and...

*screeches to a halt*

Dinosaurs could breathe... flame? Really? On page 3:

The fermenting plants in the stomach of the Parasaurolophus produced a combustible gas that ignited when the dinosaur channeled it through it's headcrest and out it's nostrils, as a defensive weapon. The Parasaurolophus was a "fire breathing dragon."

....Yes. Dinosaurs? Totes breathed flame. Don't believe him? Just look at the dinosaur's head and diet! It's obvious.

It goes on for quite a bit longer, but once I got to fire-breathing parasaurs, I knew I had to share.

*Some statements may be wildly paraphrased to make them funnier.
**That one was, um, not.




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(Post a new comment)


redwarrior
2008-03-04 12:51 am UTC (link)
CHARIZARD I CHOOSE YOU!

...Otherwise, I got nothing.

(Reply to this)


[info]caito
2008-03-04 02:34 am UTC (link)
You know who else can breathe flame?

Uncle Iroh on Avatar!
*totes just finished watching the second season just yesterday*

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]rowanberries
2008-03-04 03:22 am UTC (link)
*High-fives!*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]shaysdays
2008-03-04 04:22 am UTC (link)
Give me a couple shots of whiskey and a lit cigarette and then thur, we thall thee THPARKS!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]caito
2008-03-04 04:23 am UTC (link)
Hey, give me a match a meal of beans, and I'll make fire come out the other end for you.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]rosehiptea
2008-03-04 05:31 am UTC (link)
That scene kills me every time. He asks her "Did I ever tell you..." and even the first time I knew what she was going to say and what he was going to do but I'm still blown away by awesome when he does it.

[/squealing Iroh fangirlism]

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]chibikaijuu
2008-03-05 08:21 am UTC (link)
Why is Sugitchi on fire? ;_;

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]brennalarose
2008-03-04 03:54 am UTC (link)
*cringe* Coincidentally, the L&O episode dealing with evolution in school is on TNT. Funny, that.

Also, hypothetical science documentaries on Discovery Channel=/=fact. Trust us on this one.

This "Jim" fella is a scream. Think he does birthdays?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]seiberwing
2008-03-04 05:34 pm UTC (link)
How the heck did that get to be one of the L&O issues?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


iwanttobeasleep
2008-03-04 09:59 pm UTC (link)
It's *absolutely* crack addled. Christian school science teacher refuses to teach creationism, born again father gets pissed at him for flunking his daughter on a paper about evolution where she wrote about the support for creationism. Daughter starts to understand evolution and questions her faith. So her father kills the teacher, and his defense is that it was self-defense because if his daughter moved away from Christianity, God would kill her. (Actually she was sleeping with her guidance counselor, but lied and said it was the science teacher, and he killed the teacher over that.)

Incidentally, to cover up the murder, the father burned down a church.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]queencallipygos
2008-03-04 11:15 pm UTC (link)
Was it the Original Recipe L&O? Becuase I went to college with Jesse Martin, and I was all happy he was doing well -- but if he's in something THIS wack-nutty....

....If it was SVU, that's different, becuase then I can imagine Ice-T looking bitter and saying "That's messed up", and that makes me giggle.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-03-05 02:32 am UTC (link)
Yup. It's not my favorite episode, but I try not to hold the WTF episodes against it.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-03-05 02:33 am UTC (link)
By it, I mean the show.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]seiberwing
2008-03-04 11:18 pm UTC (link)
...yep, that's crack.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]chibikaijuu
2008-03-05 08:23 am UTC (link)
Well, that's... only slightly weirder than usual.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]funwithrage
2008-03-07 05:46 pm UTC (link)
Ohh, L&O.

I just watched the one where...okay, Really Rich Guy divorces his first wife to marry random bimbo, as they do. Has kid with first wife via IVF. Leaves all his cash in a trust fund "to his kids"; spare IVF embryos are his by judgment of divorce court. Leaves *them* to bimbo. Then dies in a car crash. Hilarity ensues.

And by "hilarity" I mean the first wife having her ex-cop driver sneak into the IVF clinic, destroy the embryos, and, in the process, fatally conk someone on the head. Good Lord.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ghostmaster
2008-03-04 09:35 am UTC (link)
This reminds me of the time our class took a field trip to some outdoorsy science thing and the "expert" who lectured us after our nature walk tried to tell us that pteradons didn't really fly. They just waddled around and flailed uselessly on the ground because they didn't have feathers. Obviously, you need feathers to fly, like a bird.

To this day, I regret being too shy to ask how bats and insects fly.

(Reply to this)


[info]staroverthebay
2008-03-07 11:05 pm UTC (link)
much lulz for the wank report. I'm not sure I want to venture into that territory. bad grammar is likely to make my head asplodey after this shitfest week.

(Reply to this)



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