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WHY ARE YOU READING A CHILDREN'S BOOK: A miniwank bedtime story.
Once upon a time, a self-published author wrote a book about ANTIGUA: The Land of Fairies Wizards and Heroes! (Alas, the land lacked commas!) She even gave it every tag in existence, of which only about three were appropriate! (Miley Sirus? Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows? High School Musical? What, no Kitchen Sink tag?) Unfortunately, it got bad reviews by everyone but the author. Even the forums weren't safe. And neither was Barnes & Noble! THE FIVE STAR REVIEWS ARE NOT FROM THE AUTHOR! REALLY!

And we all lived happily ever after!

The End!

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vzg
2008-03-28 05:44 pm UTC (link)

Oh, God, the excerpt! The very first sentence ends in an exclamation point, and so unnecessarily. It's like somene's standing on top of a staircase and yelling the story down at me.

Let's see... Out of twenty-five complete sentences on the page, sixteen end in exclamation points. That's... that's just awful.

And, you know, I like the description and how she had none of it. I swear to God, if I had put down The Forgotten Beasts of Eld and picked up this in second grade, I probably would have decided that no, I didn't like reading after all, and I especially hated fantasy.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	ALSO! vzg 2008-03-28 05:50 pm UTC (link)
	a character takes a train from Britain to England What, for serious? That's amazing. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: ALSO! vroom 2008-03-29 06:05 pm UTC (link)
	So it's educational, too. This book really has everything. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	MORE CAPS!!! vzg 2008-03-28 05:55 pm UTC (link)
	Kids 9-10 years old will appreciate this book. Clearly, this book is meant for a wide range of readers. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: MORE CAPS!!! shaysdays 2008-03-29 06:42 pm UTC (link)
	Aw man, I meant that comment below to be to you. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	shaysdays 2008-03-29 06:42 pm UTC (link)
	Out of curiosity I had my ten year old read an excerpt and she asked what grade the writer was in. Also said it didn't make much sense and the character names were weird. So um... yeah. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	vzg 2008-03-29 07:14 pm UTC (link)
	I have to wonder if this author has ever met a nine- or ten-year-old. I'm willing to bet they don't have any children — or, if they do, that their kids aren't able to read yet. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	eisoj5 2008-03-29 06:56 pm UTC (link)
	I like commas. The author does not. Hee. bookmarks to finish reading later (Reply to this)

	brennalarose 2008-04-01 01:13 am UTC (link)
	I'm not sure if I should be insulted that this broad thinks adults and older teens are incapable of enjoying fantasy or grateful that she's trying to ban people from this book. No matter what, I'm shocked she wants to subject young, impressionable, imaginative minds to that crap. (Reply to this)

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