Entry tags:

My breaducation, let me show you it
Bread wank. I've never been so happy.

bellasmommy posts some step-by-step photos on how to make baguettes. In her description, she mentions using a bit of sugar, as well as an egg wash. There is also a mention of using the microwave to proof the dough, and using scissors rather than a razor to score the loaves.

The finished loaves look lovely, and bellasmommy says, "These loaves are awesome. The outside is lightly crusty, the inside is light and chewy and fluffy." Great, right?

Oh wait. According to schlake, SHE'S DOING IT WRONG. The finished product is obviously not bread, but some demonspawn of yeast and flour.

(Now I want a macro of Senator Vreenak holding a baguette, hissing "It's a FAAAAAAAKE!") (Which, thanks to nam_jai, we now have!

PS. Bonus stock/broth wankery back in December, also courtesy of schlake.

ETA: It's also in domestic_snark, stupid_free, and sf_drama.

	Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater queencallipygos 2008-03-27 08:27 pm UTC (link)
	schlake on challah: "As long as you don't call it bread, sure. Egg bread is fine, since that what it is. I'd rather call it Challah, since egg bread doesn't adequately describe what Challah is." What queencallipygos wished she could say: "So...how would you describe challah, then? Do you use it as spackel paste?" (Reply to this)(Thread)

	Re: Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater rosehiptea 2008-03-27 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	insert wanky aside about the religious history of the word "challah" here *would contain actual content if I could be arsed to doublecheck the religious history of the word "challah." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater queencallipygos 2008-03-27 08:42 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, the best part about the "challah" tangent was when someone essentially responded with, "I know that, bee-yotch, my father's a rabbi." Hmm. I wonder what she calls foccacia? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater onaga 2008-03-27 09:11 pm UTC (link)
	That was my favorite part of the entire wank right there. (My family refers to foccacia as "fuck-you bread" due to my sister's mispronunciation. We're easily amused.) (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater brennalarose 2008-03-27 10:21 pm UTC (link)
	Reminds me of that Terry Pratchett bit about Ankh-Morporkian chocolate actually being closer to the classification of "cheese" and only missing "tile grout" by color and one other trait that escapes me. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	Re: Presenting: "What I Wish I Could Say" theater mcity 2008-03-28 02:58 am UTC (link)
	The wankas would like to order a second season. (Reply to this)(Parent)