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Auntie Singe Addams ([info]singe) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-05-16 00:27:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:body parts, defensiveness ahoy, lj, wtf_inc

Ever seen split penises?
This are an educational post. I mean, the ignorance of this subject should not be allowed to continue. NSFW! NSFW! NSFW!


Over on wtf_inc, calicoeyes admits that, ack, she had never seen a split penis and dearly wishes she could unsee it. (Good lord, so do I.) friendhamster jumps up and eagerly declares her a stoopit n00b. After some AM NOT! ARE TOO! AM NOT! ARE TOO! goes by, calicoeyes outs with a Metaquotes worthy slap...


"Here is my advice to you:
1) Open jar of Tuck's medicated pads
2) Remove your diaper
3) Apply Tuck's pad directly to your butthurt
4) Stop being such a tantrum throwing little cry baby on the internetz."


...and things continue to deteriorate. NSFW! NSFW! NSFW!


Seriously, don't click if you're squeamish. I mean, if they ain't the most objectionable schlongs I EVER did see!
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(Post a new comment)


[info]inappropriate
2008-05-16 09:56 pm UTC (link)
Surprisingly, this didn't phase me. In fact, I've seen worse. Much, much worse.

Although, this is the first time I've ever heard (or seen) split cocks. Does that make me a noob, or does the fact I've seen worse make up for it in [info]friendhamster's eyes.

(Reply to this)


[info]minibalrogmum
2008-05-16 10:04 pm UTC (link)
Pfft, koalas have bifurcated penis naturally, so I am not impressed.

(Reply to this)


[info]esseilte
2008-05-16 10:18 pm UTC (link)
Huh. They do that on purpose? Not in an unfortunate duelling incident?

Not to mention, some of those people don't look like their personal hygeine is exactly up to scratch. People. Chop your bits in half if you must, but for god's sake keep them clean.

(Reply to this)


[info]negativecosine
2008-05-16 10:25 pm UTC (link)
Mostly unrelated, but, I was reading the non-wank comments and I have to say, I particularly liked the one about Voldemort. As cupboardwitch says:

If you think hard enough, you can incorporate Harry Potter into just about anything.

I'm sure Jo is so proud of moments like these.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]erototoxin
2008-05-19 07:49 am UTC (link)
I really shouldn't have clicked that link... Harry Potter is definitely NOT what I saw when it opened. :-P

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]negativecosine, 2008-05-19 07:51 am UTC

[info]maybebaby
2008-05-17 01:06 am UTC (link)
This is nothing. They should have posted pictures of the guy who regularly splits his, stitches it back up, then splits it again, over and over again and all without anesthetic. Oh. And he does it with scissors. BME, you are a treasure-trove of WTF.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]hallidae
2008-05-17 02:49 am UTC (link)
.....Is he just the world's biggest masochist or what?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]maybebaby, 2008-05-17 04:12 pm UTC

[info]eldritch
2008-05-17 03:39 am UTC (link)
Okay, those pictures, even the infected ones, just made me go "ew."

That, on the other hand got a full-fledged: "AAAAAAAUGH"

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]fools_game
2008-05-17 03:49 am UTC (link)
So the pictures barely made me blink, but that had me crossing my legs and wincing. Ew ew ew.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]maybebaby, 2008-05-17 04:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sisterelwood, 2008-05-17 05:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]maybebaby, 2008-05-17 04:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blue_penguin, 2008-05-17 06:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]maybebaby, 2008-05-17 04:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]msmanna, 2008-05-19 07:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]enrythe8th, 2008-06-06 10:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]everstar, 2008-05-20 03:17 am UTC

[info]tsuna
2008-05-17 04:37 am UTC (link)
mother of wank wtf did i just see.

(Reply to this)


[info]luthe
2008-05-17 05:04 am UTC (link)
Really, the only things that disturbed me were the ones that had obviously gotten infected. If you're going to operate on your naughty bits, do it in such a way that they won't rot off when you're done.

(Reply to this)


[info]slackeremeritus
2008-05-17 07:39 am UTC (link)
…Now that's a cock, hey-o!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-05-19 12:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]slackeremeritus, 2008-05-19 12:24 am UTC

[info]kookaburra
2008-05-17 08:00 am UTC (link)
Ha ha! I've actually seen a fair number of these in real life at BDSM events and stuff. I'm not particularly fond of them, but I know many tops who love playing with them.

They look really silly in person - a kind of dangly shriveled effect that the photos don't really portray very well.

(Reply to this)


[info]aerobot
2008-05-17 11:48 am UTC (link)
Y'know, they say that the internet is for porn, but I say it's for showing you just how BUGFUCK CRAZY HUMAN BEINGS CAN ACTUALLY BE. Good god I was a sheltered child before I came to F_W.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-05-19 12:18 am UTC

[info]entropicdecay
2008-05-17 01:42 pm UTC (link)
Split penises? Like... cut in half? D:

I guess not having heard of them makes me a stoopit n00b according to [info]friendofhamster, then...

(Reply to this)


[info]ladyofviolets
2008-05-17 04:31 pm UTC (link)
//Ever seen split penises?//

NO AND I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM EITHER! I don't care if OI'm a n00b according to anybody, DO NOT WANT!

(Reply to this)


[info]ofadoration
2008-05-18 02:19 am UTC (link)
NOT CLICKING NOT CLICKING NOT CLICKING NOT CLICKING.

(Reply to this)


[info]sidewinder
2008-05-18 02:44 am UTC (link)
DO NOT WANT DO NOT WANT.

And yet, I cannot resist showing the bf just to enjoy watching/hearing him scream.

(Reply to this)


[info]northatlantic
2008-05-18 04:35 am UTC (link)
Soo...we finally know what bifurcated tongues are good for apparently.

Yeah, I went there.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - redwarrior, 2008-05-20 08:26 pm UTC

[info]schoenschoen
2008-05-18 07:14 pm UTC (link)
I had kind of a shitty day today, so one of my friends who happened to be cruising Metaquotes showed this to me.

Split peens make everything better(?).

(Reply to this)


[info]isntitironic
2008-05-19 06:39 am UTC (link)
Aaaaaaand morbid curiosity claims another batch o' brain cells.

(Reply to this)


[info]anon_a_mouse
2008-05-19 04:31 pm UTC (link)
Not that I mind, but why the hell do I come across this when I'm at work, and 4-ch is open in the other tab. I was enjoying quiet text boards goddamit, and now I can't open this because a coworker is sitting right next to me. :(

(Reply to this)


[info]anonyrat
2008-05-19 09:05 pm UTC (link)
Please tell me someone here has read Wraeththu.

Please.

(Reply to this)


redwarrior
2008-05-20 08:25 pm UTC (link)
It makes me want to hold onto my own crotch in pain.

(Reply to this)


[info]knightrider
2008-05-22 01:10 am UTC (link)
I love how the peen horror has overshadowed the wank. Good thing for friendhamster and calicoeyes, because they're both cocks.

HAH! See what I did there?

(Reply to this)
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