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jaythenerdkid ([info]jaythenerdkid) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-06-19 01:20:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:cruel shoes, genderblah, godwin's, jokes that don't go over well, parents taking shit too seriously, sexism, shoes for industry!, tags are serious business, think of the children, whining in comments

Wank? In my snark comm?
It's more likely than you think.

So, over at ugly_crap on LJ, the comm members amuse themselves by doing the equivalent of telling ghost stories: finding the ugliest/most tasteless products possible and snarking them. Most of the time, things are pretty quiet there - it's quite rare that commenters disagree with the OP's judgement, and when it happens, it's usually pretty civil.

But when moira_aoibheane posts these high heels for babies, things get a little messy.

We have accusations that commenters have no sense of humour, cries of misogyny, and your standard "This isn't funny!" "That's because you have no sense of humour!" "ZOMG U JUST INSULTED MY SENSE OF HUMOUR U H00R!".

And, because no wank would be complete without it: invocation of Godwin's Law for absolutely no reason at all!

Small, but tasty.



(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]pantyless_angel
2008-06-18 05:42 pm UTC (link)
How the hell are those going stay on baby feet? I don't know anyone who can keep socks on baby feet.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]damnedfallacy
2008-06-18 05:47 pm UTC (link)
I think those really ARE socks or at least smushy slipper things. But they don't seem to have the elastic of socks, so I would guess that they'll stay on the baby's feet just long enough for the parent to point the camera but not actually take the picture. :D

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]silrana
2008-06-18 05:58 pm UTC (link)
I was just wondering the same thing. I spent tons of time when my girls were little keeping their socks and shoes actually on their feet.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-18 07:13 pm UTC (link)
Scotch tape?

My mother needed a way to find me when I got away from her (I was a quick little shit and bald until I was two). Solution? Tape a huge-ass bow to my head.

But, then, I was raised by weirdos.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]watersword
2008-06-18 09:37 pm UTC (link)
Are you my long-lost twin?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-18 11:48 pm UTC (link)
Possibly. Did you get lost in damn near every ethnic festival in town?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]hallidae
2008-06-18 09:54 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorry, I LOL'd for almost two minutes straight. Though I think if it wasn't for the fact that I was a hobbit as a child, my mother would have tried the same.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-18 11:49 pm UTC (link)
She also had to padlock me into a harness. It was the only way to not lose me in department stores.

I'm convinced one of my ancestors must have had a steamy affair with Hermes.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]hallidae
2008-06-19 12:04 am UTC (link)
My parents tried a toddler leash. I quickly learned that embarrassing my mother (by sitting on the floor and sulking until a passing adult asked me what was wrong, then replying as pissily as possible "I not dog!") was the fastest way to get out of them.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-19 01:16 am UTC (link)
You were smarter than I was. Then again, I didn't know a lot of dogs. We had cats.

I unzipped mine. So Mom turned it around. I found something to lean against and shimmied it down. So she sewed d-rings on and stuck a padlock on it. I decided to humiliate her other ways.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]exit_chrysalis
2008-06-18 10:42 pm UTC (link)
My mom continued with the huge-ass bows until I was like 7. This was the early 90s.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-18 11:51 pm UTC (link)
Ditto. Though we had to quit it with the scotch tape once I got hair. It was so curly, velcro sat up and begged.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]exit_chrysalis
2008-06-18 11:52 pm UTC (link)
My mom made bows out of massively wide ribbon, empty barrettes, and hot glue. My favorite was an empty plastic one she filled with jelly beans. :D

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-06-19 01:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]exit_chrysalis, 2008-06-19 01:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-06-19 02:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]exit_chrysalis, 2008-06-19 02:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-06-19 02:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chibikaijuu, 2008-06-19 07:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-06-19 09:17 pm UTC

[info]pantyless_angel
2008-06-19 02:38 am UTC (link)
I read that as huge-ass bowl at first, the mental image was fantastic.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]brennalarose
2008-06-19 02:43 am UTC (link)
Knowing my family, that's an easy mistake to make. I'm sure we've done weirder things and just don't talk about it.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]evilsqueakers
2008-06-19 06:30 am UTC (link)
Yes! I'm not the only bald until 2 kid around. Didn't have teeth either. I also was nice enough at the age of about three to play hide and seek with my mom at Disney World. Without bothering to tell anyone. Oops.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]tofuknight
2008-06-19 04:07 pm UTC (link)
Parents love that game!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]evilsqueakers
2008-06-19 08:59 pm UTC (link)
Well, of course they do! Especially when you're bendable enough to get out of the stroller and they're so damned tired of playing "chase the kid." I'll finish the story as my godmom would: "when we got back to the Holiday Inn, she ran into the bar, hopped up on the barstool, and announced 'This is my mama, her name is Babah, and boy does she need a drink." The kicker being the bartender agreed. I was prone to playing it at least once a day.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]brennalarose, 2008-06-19 09:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilsqueakers, 2008-06-20 12:30 am UTC

[info]mary_mac
2008-06-18 08:13 pm UTC (link)
Totally. This is the reason my cousin's daughter is in tights or nothing. Socks just weren't going to happen.

My ex's mum is still going on about him throwing his first pair of shoes under a bus. 25 years ago :)

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]rachelmap
2008-06-19 12:30 am UTC (link)
Superglue?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ecchaniz0r
2008-06-19 12:56 am UTC (link)
One of my minicousins, when she'd gained enough motor skills, used to carefully remove her shoes, pull her socks off, roll them up, hide them in the sofa, don her shoes anew, and vroom off.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]serai
2008-06-19 06:18 am UTC (link)
You know, I could be wrong about this, but I get the impression that they're the kind of baby shoes that are meant to hang from your rear-view mirror. In other words, they're "baby shoes" in name only.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]platedlizard
2008-06-21 04:58 am UTC (link)
Sadly, no. At least not according to the press-release-masquerading-as-a-newsreport I heard on the radio. The designer got the idea at her daughter's first birthday party. Apparently she thought putting her infant in high-heels would be hilarious (hence the name of the shoes)

I immediately thought of the wank this product would produce and was counting down the time until it appeared here.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]damien
2008-06-23 12:29 am UTC (link)
Staples.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]wickedwitch
2008-06-23 04:17 pm UTC (link)
I love you.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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