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Dan Fogelberg's ([info]llama_treats) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-08-19 10:36:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:britney spears' vagina, photoshop, won't someone think of the actors

Methinks even a "good" poster couldn't help your formulaic romantic comedy
Dane Cook: "Whoever Photoshopped our poster must have done so at Taser point with three minutes to fulfill their hostage takers' deranged obligations.... This is so glossy it makes Entertainment Weekly look wooden."

Assorted Commenters: Wow, Dane Cook, Jason Biggs AND Kate Hudson in one movie?! Can celuloid alone contain such powerful mediocrity?

Me: ...who the hell is Dane Cook?


(Post a new comment)


[info]the__ivorytower
2008-08-19 04:23 pm UTC (link)
Comedian. Someone did a bunch of his comedy sketches with scenes from Naruto, it was actually pretty funny.

This reminds me why I don't read the comments on blogs, ignorance = bliss.

(This was featured through PhotoshopDisasters, which is regularly borderline I-don't-see-the-disaster wanky).

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 04:35 pm UTC (link)
I must admit I always enjoy the random disembodied hands over on Photoshop Disasters. This poster definitely needs some of those.

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[info]the__ivorytower
2008-08-19 04:36 pm UTC (link)
The recent one of the completely different girl in the reflection amused me something fierce, but how can anyone not love disembodied hands!

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iwanttobeasleep
2008-08-19 07:43 pm UTC (link)
I love the commenters on PhotoshopDisasters. You'd think the people who are on that blog wouldn't go so far to defend bad photoshops.

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[info]come_love_sleep
2008-08-20 06:55 pm UTC (link)
thanks for the candy

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[info]schuldig
2008-08-19 04:32 pm UTC (link)
Now THIS is how you do funny on otf_wank.

I... I... kind of want to see the movie now.

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 04:35 pm UTC (link)
I'm becoming convinced it was a ploy to get people to see the movie.

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[info]schuldig
2008-08-19 04:38 pm UTC (link)
Viral marketing? It's working. Well, if it shows in Japan, that is. We haven't even had Iron Man yet.

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[info]caito
2008-08-21 04:31 am UTC (link)
Where in Japan are you?

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[info]schuldig
2008-08-21 04:45 am UTC (link)
West Tokyo.

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[info]caito
2008-08-21 04:48 am UTC (link)
That's funny. Up here in the Tohoku boonies, I'm pretty sure we got Iron Man (though just last weekend).

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[info]schuldig
2008-08-21 04:51 am UTC (link)
I guess I'll recheck Yahoo then. Last time I heard, it was scheduled for next month (though, presumably, with a preview week beforehand).

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[info]caito
2008-08-21 04:52 am UTC (link)
I only know what other people tell me. A friend of mind was talking about making plans to see Iron Man last weekend is how I know; I don't actually do things like check the internet (I'm Nihongo illiterate, unfortch). So you could very well be right.

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[info]schuldig
2008-08-21 05:01 am UTC (link)
Hm... Yahoo is still giving me a date of the 27th of next month. Maybe they released it early in your area?

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[info]caito
2008-08-21 05:04 am UTC (link)
That would be so weird if a nowhere-land like Akita City got a movie before somewhere in frickin' Tokyo did. That would be like deciding to hold off releasing a movie in New York, but in the meantime, let's go ahead and show it in Toledo.

I must be misinformed. My bad!

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[info]rosehiptea
2008-08-19 05:23 pm UTC (link)
I kind of do too, despite feeling that I can probably figure out major plot points without seeing it.

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[info]rhrsoulmates
2008-08-19 05:08 pm UTC (link)
6. Flesh:
It's no secret that I'm more rugged facially due to a drunken visit by the teen acne fairy, but according to this poster I've got perfect porcelain flesh. I look like the fuckin' bathroom floor at Caesars Palace. One of Marie Osmond's dolls would look at me and say "shit ... that guys got flawless skin!"

That made me LMAO. I like that he totally rips apart the promo poster. I wish more actors would do that. ;) It wouldn't surprise me though if this is part of a publicity plan too.

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[info]hallidae
2008-08-19 05:14 pm UTC (link)
I admit, I totally sporfled at that one.

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[info]queencallipygos
2008-08-20 05:05 am UTC (link)
....I'm just going to stare at your icon for a while. Please, as you all were.

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[info]seeshellirun
2008-08-21 08:14 pm UTC (link)
It's absolutely true, too. I used to be a big fan of his (..."used to" being the operative phrase here) and a few years ago during Easter weekend (because when else would you go see a comedian talk about his lighthouse penis?) we wound up getting tickets to the improv at a table smack dab in the front. My first thought was "Wow, that's a LOT of make-up to do not a whole lot of help..."

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[info]shinga
2008-08-19 05:31 pm UTC (link)
After reading that blog... holy shit did I just LOL at stuff Dane Cook said?! Well hell, there goes my reputation. ;)

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[info]napalmnacey
2008-08-19 05:59 pm UTC (link)
I KNOW, RIGHT? Maybe if someone took his red candy away, he wouldn't act like a fucking douche-bag on stage all the time. And, you know, badly rip off other people's jokes. (Ripping off people's jokes is fine - it's a standard practice in comedy circles, but he doesn't do it very well, and when you rip off Bill Hicks, you're gonna piss a few people off).

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[info]doomsday
2008-08-19 06:05 pm UTC (link)
I know, right? It is a blog, though, so I'm guessing either a) ghostwriter or b) hours and hours of revision.

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[info]yhallothar
2008-08-19 06:08 pm UTC (link)
Agreed!

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[info]coffee_mug
2008-08-20 12:18 am UTC (link)
But it's not like his stand up is improvised.. So I'm guessing it's the fact you *read* the words, you don't actually see and hear him say it. :D

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[info]solar_type_star
2008-08-20 04:31 pm UTC (link)
I felt bad for it too. But I think he's allowed a glitch once a year.

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[info]keleri
2008-08-19 05:51 pm UTC (link)
Dane Cook, you are such a douche, but that blog entry was pretty funny. :/ BAH!

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[info]plazmah
2008-08-19 08:10 pm UTC (link)
I know... I LOLed and now I sorta hate myself.

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[info]diamonde
2008-08-20 11:59 am UTC (link)
If that's not a perfect description of life on the internet, I don't know what is.

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[info]ru_debega
2008-08-19 05:56 pm UTC (link)
His "You Suck at Photoshop" vids on Youtube are some of the only really funny things he's done.

It looks like I'm wearing Maybelline Water Shine Diamonds Liquid Lipstick. My characters name is now Winter Solstice and I'm a hooker with a heart of gold.

I admit it. I lol'ed.

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[info]napalmnacey
2008-08-19 06:00 pm UTC (link)
I've seen those. I had no idea they were him!

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[info]ru_debega
2008-08-19 08:04 pm UTC (link)
It isn't, apparently. D: I was mistaken.

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[info]jigofspite
2008-08-19 07:55 pm UTC (link)
I'd heard rumors it was him, but I always thought it sounded like David Cross...

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[info]ru_debega
2008-08-19 08:03 pm UTC (link)
Well, lookie there. I was wrong. Apologies, I was introduced to them by my boyfriend and he told me it *was* Dane Cook, and never having investigated further, I had no reason to disbelieve him.

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[info]jigofspite
2008-08-19 11:36 pm UTC (link)
Oh, that's cool! I bet ad guys see a lot of shitty Photoshopping. Heh.

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[info]smashingstars
2008-08-20 03:49 am UTC (link)
Don't worry about it - a LOT of people thought it was Dane Cook. At least half the commenters on YouTube and a bunch of blogs said it was.

I wish Danny would come back and tell us why we suck at Photoshop again.

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[info]smashingstars
2008-08-20 03:50 am UTC (link)
You know, of course, that I mean "Donny". D'oh.

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[info]puipui
2008-08-19 06:03 pm UTC (link)
Did I just accidentally go to MySpace? I feel all dirty now. :(

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 06:06 pm UTC (link)
Just think how you'd feel if you went there on purpose. D:

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[info]puipui
2008-08-19 06:13 pm UTC (link)
I'll never feel clean again. D:

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[info]tiki
2008-08-19 07:09 pm UTC (link)
How did you wind up on his MySpace blog without knowing who he is?

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 07:13 pm UTC (link)
I found the other article first! LOGIC IS FUN!

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[info]tiki
2008-08-19 07:41 pm UTC (link)
LOGIC! doesn't really answer the question, since the Popwatch article and comments tell you all you need to know-- "unfunny comedian/star of upcoming film 'My Best Friends's Girl'.

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 07:46 pm UTC (link)
That's nice, honey.

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[info]mindset
2008-08-19 08:23 pm UTC (link)
(Psst: There's a form of humor where someone asks "who the hell is ThisGuy", even though they really know who ThisGuy is. It's done to show how little ThisGuy actually matters.)

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[info]llama_treats
2008-08-19 08:28 pm UTC (link)
(Other than "supposedly a comedian and in one bad-looking movie", I still don't know.)

(Also: See that Jude Law joke that got Sean Penn up in arms.)

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[info]tiarlynn
2008-08-20 01:58 am UTC (link)
Him mentioning You Suck At Photoshop is too close to him maybe being Donnie. I would have to cry.

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[info]vzg
2008-08-20 05:07 am UTC (link)
It looks like I'm wearing Maybelline Water Shine Diamonds Liquid Lipstick. My characters name is now Winter Solstice and I'm a hooker with a heart of gold. Jason is my floral carrying pimp, while Kate is my first trick!

I'd see that. Not My Best Friend's Girl, but that.

Alec Baldwin is so fucking funny in this movie! Is he on the poster? I think so. He plays the wise talking plant Jason is clutching.

...also that.

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[info]aeka
2008-08-21 06:36 am UTC (link)
I would love to see Dane Cook open up Photoshop and create non-hackjob posters to his own movies and see if that will help "send the right people" to the theatre or even help increase the chances gaining more than 30 million at the box office.

To be honest the poster was probably the only thing that would have made me consider watching the movie. When I saw the trailer for it on the other hand, it looked like the same old shit that I've seen rehashed in moves like American Wedding, Buying the Cow, Waiting, and other low-budget comedies that have been box office failures rather than box office smash hits. Just watching the trailer alone didn't look like anything original that hasn't already been done before.

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