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Dan Fogelberg's ([info]llama_treats) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-12-16 15:09:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:shampoo killed my mother, you insensitive prick

Gee, this wank smells terrific
So, what do you think about "salon" shampoos that you buy from overstock stores?

They're evil and wrong. EVIL AND WRONG! DANGER WILL ROBINSON! THEY KILLED A MAN IN RENO JUST TO WATCH HIM DIE!


(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

True story!
[info]phosfate
2008-12-16 10:48 pm UTC (link)
My salon guy: OMG your hair is so healthy. What do you use?
Me: Cheapass brandTM.
My salon guy: HOLY SHIT NEVER USE THAT! It will destroy your hair and give you cancer. HAIR CANCER.
Me: I've been using it for 10 years.
My salon guy: You really need to try this product. It's made from bat fetus and uranium!
Me: Gosh, I'll think about it really hard.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]sistercoyote
2008-12-16 10:56 pm UTC (link)
MSG: What do you use on your hair?
Me: Baby Shampoo.
MSG: Oh. [pause] Well, it's working really well for you.

Do you suppose it was something about the way I said Baby Shampoo? You'd almost think I'd said I was using shampoo made of babies.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]phosfate
2008-12-16 10:59 pm UTC (link)
Don't they make some kind of placenta shampoo?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]hallidae, 2008-12-16 11:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2008-12-16 11:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]also_not_a_pipe, 2008-12-17 01:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]dark_puck, 2008-12-17 02:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]hyaenid, 2008-12-17 02:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2008-12-17 02:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lirazel, 2008-12-17 03:16 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]anonyrat, 2008-12-17 07:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]doomsday, 2008-12-17 08:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]lirazel, 2008-12-17 08:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frau_eva, 2008-12-18 12:58 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pfeffermuse, 2008-12-19 08:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wrongly_amused, 2008-12-16 11:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]witty, 2008-12-17 02:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lirazel, 2008-12-17 03:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sistercoyote, 2008-12-16 11:23 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]insanityprelude, 2008-12-18 11:09 pm UTC

[info]lysana
2008-12-16 11:16 pm UTC (link)
For a lot of people, baby shampoo is very drying. It's become standard cant in hairstyling circles from what I've heard that you don't use baby shampoo, ever. *shrug* I confess to buying my shampoo at a health food store, but dear gods, does it do wonders for my hair.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sistercoyote, 2008-12-16 11:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]drhenryjekyll, 2008-12-17 06:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]heddychaa, 2008-12-18 11:55 pm UTC
Re: True story!
[info]silrana
2008-12-16 11:13 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, I've had that conversation, too. Being a lifelong cheapass shopper (my children think of name brands as luxury products) I've had the occassional snarky go-round with hair cutters. I usually shut them down when I tell them that the one time I broke down and tried salon shampoo I had to take a second shower later in the day and scrub it out with dish detergent to get the horrible, horrible slimy feeling off my head.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story!
[info]phosfate
2008-12-16 11:23 pm UTC (link)
Oh hells yeah. "Why does my hair feel like birthday candles?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]adevyish
2008-12-17 01:36 am UTC (link)
I go to $10/cut hair-cut places, which obviously don't have anything to sell me.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story! - [info]silrana, 2008-12-17 02:20 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]catmoran, 2008-12-17 08:40 pm UTC
Re: True story!
[info]ecchaniz0r
2008-12-17 05:09 am UTC (link)
D: Ohgahd. I hear you.

Also! Salon shampoo usually has an ass-tonne of perfume in it, which gives me a horrid itchfest or headache or both. I use Head and Shoulders on account of having scalp akin to ARRAKIS; my stylist has never once dissed it, because she Gets Such Things.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story! - [info]silrana, 2008-12-17 06:04 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]ecchaniz0r, 2008-12-17 01:53 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]frequentmouse, 2008-12-17 09:23 pm UTC
Love the conversation!
[info]zyna_kat
2008-12-16 11:57 pm UTC (link)
Anyone: What do you use?
Me: Uh, whatever shampoo smells good to me at the local CVS. Right now, something fruity. (It might even have CONES!)

On the other hand, the only styling product I use is Bumble & Bumble styling creme, which costs a lot and isn't available even at most salons.


(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Love the conversation!
[info]braisinhussy
2008-12-17 06:22 pm UTC (link)
Ooh, that's what I'm getting my mom for Christmas. I'm calling a bunch of salons at lunch today to find out who has the best price. ($30. For hair goo. Ridiculous.)

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: Love the conversation! - [info]gunshou, 2008-12-17 06:54 pm UTC
Re: Love the conversation! - [info]risha, 2008-12-18 01:16 am UTC
Re: True story!
[info]brennalarose
2008-12-17 12:13 am UTC (link)
MSL: The salon lady in San Juan who did my hair for my mother's wedding.

MSL: You have beautiful hair!
Me: Thanks, I use (pricey but accessible brand).
MSL: OMG, You're KILLING your hair. That's made for WHITEPEOPLE'S hair and you aren't.
Me: Er...I'm multiracial?

Next thing you know, my mother's spent twenty bucks on a bottle of hair cream and a bottle of mousse, neither of which were big enough and can't be found anywhere else (and admittedly, did great things for my hair). But I got back to the mainland, and found damn near the same product for $2 at the Evil Empire (pronounced Wal-Mart).

*sigh*

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story!
[info]kookaburra
2008-12-17 03:41 am UTC (link)
Oh noez! I must be murdering my hair too, since I am outrageously white now that it is winter and I work at night and I often use products from the "ethnic hair care" aisle.

srsly, that olive oil stuff? AMAZING

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]napalmnacey
2008-12-17 06:25 am UTC (link)
I can't use 'white people' hair products anyway. My Gran was from Malta and I got a fair slap of her genetics, which meant great bone structure, awesome figure, gorgeous hair but dang, it gets oily quickly. And all the hair products in Australia are marketed to blonde women, or women that try to be blonde by frying their hair, so it's all DEEP MOISTURISING or full of some special fucking lipids or whatever.

I don't need that. I need something that'll clean my hair and leave it nice and shiny but won't weigh it down. Can I find that? No. I'm on rotation between Pantene Classic Clean, Garnier Fructus Oily Roots, Dry Ends and Herbal Essences Drama Clean. None of them do the job as well as Schwarzkopf but can I find a Schwarzkopf range for oily hair anywhere that doesn't cost fifty bucks a bottle? NOOOOOOOOOO.

/yaoi rant about hair

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story! - [info]sparkysrevenge, 2008-12-17 11:23 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]jaseroque, 2008-12-17 03:56 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]bluenakedlady, 2008-12-17 10:08 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]jaseroque, 2008-12-18 01:20 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]sheep, 2008-12-17 06:40 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]mary_mac, 2008-12-18 02:43 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-12-18 03:54 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]mary_mac, 2008-12-18 04:06 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-12-18 04:08 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]mary_mac, 2008-12-18 04:28 pm UTC
Re: True story! - tree, 2008-12-18 09:06 pm UTC
AUGH - tree, 2008-12-18 09:08 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]heddychaa, 2008-12-18 11:54 pm UTC
Re: True story! - [info]brennalarose, 2008-12-19 03:12 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-12-19 05:13 am UTC
Re: True story!
[info]metal_dog5
2008-12-17 12:49 am UTC (link)
You really need to try this product. It's made from bat fetus and uranium!

Yeah, I tried that and it made my hair look and feel like straw. Obviously it's the straw effect which keeps the hair cancer at bay.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story!
[info]lirazel
2008-12-17 03:25 pm UTC (link)
Side-effect of the uranium is that it provides the neccessary radiation treatment to thwart hair cancer. Trufax.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]platedlizard
2008-12-17 02:02 am UTC (link)
lol.

My sister: Um hi, I'm a Marine on leave in Germany, and I need to get my hair cut.
Hair Stylist: *doesn't speak English*
Sister: Oookay.
Hair Stylist: *whacks one foot of dead hair off, neatens up the rest*
Sister: Thanks! What do you recommend to prevent my hair getting like that ever again? *makes vague gestures*
Hair Stylist: *pulls out a canister of something, which turns out to be pure shea butter*
Sister: Thanks! *buys* *realizes later the stuff was, like, $50*

Mind, it worked really well, I don't think her hair has ever been so healthy. But then my sister has really weird hair for a Caucasian, almost kinky. She is probably the only white girl who could have gotten away with corn rows or dreads without looking shitty.

/thoughts on hair

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]april_hurst
2008-12-17 02:29 am UTC (link)
I get comments from the people at Super Cuts (yeah, I know, that's a very high-class exclusive salon, try not to get too jealous) about how healthy and thick mine is as well, and I use shitty cheap shampoo and no conditioner.

I think it's because I keep it too short for sun damage or other damage to show, and stopped coloring it. Without the gray I don't look old enough to buy liquor.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]llama_treats
2008-12-17 03:43 am UTC (link)
The last time I washed my hair with bat fetus and uranium I got detained at airport security. :(

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]sorchar
2008-12-17 04:46 am UTC (link)
I had a salon person trying to convince me that after she dragged her scissors blade over a lock of my hair, the stuff on the blade was buildup. I'm like, "No, you just SCRAPED MY HAIR YOU FREAK."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story!
[info]lirazel
2008-12-17 03:28 pm UTC (link)
;_; "Thanks for damaging it more, twit."

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]napalmnacey
2008-12-17 06:19 am UTC (link)
It doesn't matter what the hell I use on my hair, it's oily by the end of the day. So it doesn't fucking matter.

PS. God DAMN these electric sex pants!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story! - [info]sizer, 2008-12-17 11:26 am UTC
Re: True story! - [info]napalmnacey, 2008-12-17 02:11 pm UTC
Re: True story!
[info]demonbean
2008-12-17 06:23 am UTC (link)
MSG: Do you want to keep the layers?
Me: I have layers?
MSG: *frosty stare*
Me: Sure, let's keep the layers.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]melusine
2008-12-17 08:07 am UTC (link)
I used to make the head beauty advisor at the store I worked at twitch when people would ask me what I used on my hair. My answer was whatever costs a dollar or less for a huge bottle XD

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: True story! - [info]funwithrage, 2008-12-17 06:37 pm UTC
Re: True story!
[info]made_by_kali
2008-12-17 11:24 pm UTC (link)
I love the look the stylist gives me when my answer is baking soda, twice a week. And then they don't understand why I don't want half a can of hairspray in my hair.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

Re: True story!
[info]florence_craye
2008-12-18 09:12 pm UTC (link)
I have to say, the Suave professional line works really well for my hair. I was using Biolage, and couldn't afford it after I had my own place. But the Sally Beauty Supply biolage knock-off Biotera is even better. And they're cheaper, cheaper HA HA HA HA HA!

(Reply to this)(Parent)

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