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I wish I was boning vampires. ([info]tehrin) wrote in [info]otf_wank,
@ 2008-12-31 17:31:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:baristas: not sga-related

A Short Tale of Starbucks, a Barista, and a Guitar
Small wank brought to you by [info]wank_report and [info]baristas.

Guy, supposedly, leaves guitar at Starbucks. Guy comes back and has an exchange with [info]wrything_worms.


me: that's $1.55 please
guy: I left a guitar here the other day... I was wondering if it was still here.
me: oh yes, I'm assuming that's your guitar in the back there. *goes and fetches guitar*
guy: oh I can't take it with me now, could you possibly hold it for me until tomorrow?
me: we're not really your storage unit, we can't be holding your stuff for you.
guy: (practically yelling at me) I KNOW. But I CAN'T take it with me I'm on a BICYCLE and I'll risk injuring myself if i take it with me blah blah blah (rants on about how we need to hold it since there's no way in hell he could take it)
me: (fed up with him) I can put it in the back but I can't guarantee that i'll be here the next time you stop by, as we can't be held responsible for lost items
guy: I know. I came by just to show face for it.
me: ...

eventually I got rid of him and put his stupid guitar in the back and sentenced us to another night of us tripping over the damn thing. from the floor hearing loud screams of "fucking guitar!" were often heard.
when I finally got off I tripped over the damn thing again and finally told my shift that I didn't care about the guy and was going to take the damn guitar with me since we all had to trip over it all night.
he said he didn't care and encouraged me to do so in fact. so basically I got a free guitar.

we told him we weren't responsible for it.



[info]wrything_worms decides to keep the guitar (HEY, FREE GUITAR, GAIZ!) after Guy doesn't come back for it and post the supposedly totally true tale here. Mixed reaction occurs with a lot of "you suck" and the dreaded C word gets thrown into play. Some people agree because the customer was trying to take advantage.
[info]wrything_worms then flounces and passive-agressively recants keeping the guitar in a second post to prove to all those nasty people calling [info]wrything_worms an asshole just how much of a non-asshole [info]wrything_worms is.


to all those who decided to tell me how much an asshole I was and how much I suck,

the guy's getting his guitar returned.

there. be happy. I'm doing the polite and courteous thing. I'm being legendary

it has nothing to do with you

we can all argue whether or not it was okay for me taking it home when he left it there, but I really don't care to hear more of what a 'cunt' I am.
seriously, cunt? don't think I'm gonna be phased by some whiney brat who got their panties in a twist over something and decided to use a four letter word that some people decide to get all offended by. seriously, go hang out with a group of pompous brits.


in short he's getting his guitar back, now everyone's happy. now we can all get back to serving coffee like good lackeys.



Naturally, more drama unfolds, but a lot of people agree that the cunt comment was uncalled for.

Someone asks an important question: Wait, how did he get the guitar there if he was riding a bike?
my reference to british people was merely referring to the fact that a great many of them use the word 'cunt' like any other word, therefore taking away from it's power Or how personal journal trolling is the classy thing to do.
When he comes to get it, fuck with his head!

Edit: What exactly can you get from starbucks that's $1.55 anyways?



(Post a new comment)


[info]lemone
2009-01-01 03:11 am UTC (link)
$1.55 = Apparently a lone shot of espresso. Maybe an iced tea too? It'd have to be a tall or something though, a venti is usually 1.89-2ish. Maybe a cookie type thing or a doubleshot in a can?

I'm frankly a bit surprised that the guitar wasn't nicked the moment Dude turned his back. Doesn't make it right for the OP to steal it, of course...

(Reply to this)


[info]emiweebee
2009-01-01 04:13 am UTC (link)
Regular coffee used to go for under $2 when I was working - even a venti. We would get price adjusted about every six months, though; haven't checked prices but regular could easily be over $2 now.

Nice of her to claim returning property is "legendary" service. The whole store sounds like it's staffed with some of the worst baristas.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]artimusdin
2009-01-02 07:33 am UTC (link)
Where I am, it's $1.82/$2.04/$2.15 respectively.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]phosfate
2009-01-01 04:16 am UTC (link)
What exactly can you get from starbucks that's $1.55 anyways?

That would be coffee.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]tehrin
2009-01-01 04:26 am UTC (link)
Probably just regular. I think hot cocoa is that price.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]jocelyncs, 2009-01-01 07:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2009-01-01 05:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2009-01-01 05:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2009-01-01 05:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-01 07:21 am UTC

[info]jkefka
2009-01-01 04:17 am UTC (link)
As with all good wanks, there is no "right" side here. Everyone is a fucking moron, and their idiocy shines through so beautifully.

Seriously, leaving your guitar at a fucking starbucks, and asking after it only to pick it up the next day? LE DUMB.

Taking it home with you and then bragging about it on das LJ? Welcome to ASNEM. Yes, it's MENSA spelled backwards, not that you would notice you freaking tool.

Getting all bitchy-face about the word "cunt" and throwing The Noble Island of Great Britain into the ring? My god, your IQ cannot be measured in standard notation. Are you familiar with Avogadro's number?

I'm feeling a tad ornery tonight, but that might be because it's New Year's Eve and I have nothing to do.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-01 04:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jkefka, 2009-01-01 05:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]caito, 2009-01-01 08:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-01 07:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kadath, 2009-01-01 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]insanityprelude, 2009-01-01 09:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-01 10:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-01 11:39 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2009-01-01 11:53 pm UTC

[info]nevadafighter
2009-01-01 04:51 am UTC (link)
What a fucking oversensitive dumbass.

(Reply to this)


[info]dragonfangirl
2009-01-01 06:01 am UTC (link)
Wait... if he wasn't going to take it with him, why the hell did he come back and get it? seriously, he could have called them, asked if it was there, and pretended like he wouldn't be able to come and get it till the next day.

Also: this is why bikes should have moar storage.

(Reply to this)


[info]deliciouschaos
2009-01-01 06:20 am UTC (link)
What exactly can you get from starbucks that's $1.55 anyways?

A guitar?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-01 07:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]finchbird, 2009-01-01 07:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]jkefka, 2009-01-01 01:50 pm UTC

[info]vzg
2009-01-01 06:37 am UTC (link)
I'm being legendary

Oh... it's not even worth saying anything. That's just hilarious on its own.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]oxfordcomma, 2009-01-01 07:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2009-01-01 07:25 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2009-01-01 05:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2009-01-01 05:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2009-01-01 05:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]aposiopetic, 2009-01-03 09:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]cleolinda, 2009-01-03 03:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]twoiskewl, 2009-01-01 06:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2009-01-01 06:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]phasmas, 2009-01-02 05:57 am UTC

[info]julian_black
2009-01-01 08:03 am UTC (link)
I thnk you can still get a Tall drip coffee or a cup of tea for $1.55, but I could be wrong.

(And I've seen lots of guitars transported on bicycles, usually worn backpack-style by the cyclists, and more often than not with a bandanna-clad mutt galloping alongside.)

That said, Mad magazine could have a new cartoon based on these guys; instead of "Spy vs. Spy" it could be called "Dumbass vs. Dumbass."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2009-01-01 08:14 am UTC

[info]sisterelwood
2009-01-01 08:53 am UTC (link)
my reference to british people was merely referring to the fact that a great many of them use the word 'cunt' like any other word, therefore taking away from it's power

< sarcasm >
They do? Huh. You learn something new everyday.
</ sarcasm >

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]missingopossum, 2009-01-01 11:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep, 2009-01-01 11:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]kookaburra, 2009-01-01 02:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mochibuni, 2009-01-04 03:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]yoritomo_reiko, 2009-01-01 04:03 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheep, 2009-01-01 07:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2009-01-01 08:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-01 08:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sisterelwood, 2009-01-01 10:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-01 10:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-01 10:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-01 10:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-02 01:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-02 04:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-03 11:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-03 11:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-03 01:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sisterelwood, 2009-01-02 01:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mary_mac, 2009-01-02 02:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]eleutheria, 2009-01-02 01:33 am UTC

[info]also_not_a_pipe
2009-01-01 09:38 am UTC (link)
Is he planning to play the guitar while biking it home? Is that why he's so worried about bicycle-inflicted guitar injuries?

(Reply to this)


[info]sheep
2009-01-01 11:39 am UTC (link)
go hang out with a group of pompous brits.

We may not use cunt as much as you think, however, we are quite fond of Fuck Off you Wanker!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]sharps, 2009-01-02 01:37 pm UTC

[info]pyrrah
2009-01-01 12:10 pm UTC (link)
I keep giggling at the thought of cries of "Fucking guitar!!1".

But that's just me. I'm 12.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]vzg, 2009-01-01 06:56 pm UTC

tree
2009-01-01 01:08 pm UTC (link)
Who the hell leaves their possessions with a random shop/cafe to keep? I'm not saying worms isn't a bit of a dick, but the guy was really asking for his guitar to disappear.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2009-01-01 06:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]platedlizard, 2009-01-01 07:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2009-01-01 08:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - tree, 2009-01-01 10:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]frequentmouse, 2009-01-01 11:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zumie_ashlen, 2009-01-02 04:04 am UTC

[info]soy_latte
2009-01-01 07:31 pm UTC (link)
Not suprised to see this here, as I considered putting it up myself. There's been more frequent douchebaggery in that community latey.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]soy_latte, 2009-01-01 07:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-02 12:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]sorchar, 2009-01-02 12:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]soy_latte, 2009-01-02 06:47 am UTC

[info]beejium
2009-01-02 12:36 am UTC (link)
People just need to GTF over the word "cunt."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]napalmnacey, 2009-01-03 01:48 pm UTC

[info]singlesyllable
2009-01-02 02:11 am UTC (link)
Sheesh. Holdthedivine went from zero to full-on schizophrenia pretty quick right there.

(Reply to this)


[info]annabelle_lee
2009-01-02 03:00 am UTC (link)
Tall hot tea before tax in NY. *is shameful Sbux addict*

(Reply to this)


[info]herongale
2009-01-02 10:16 am UTC (link)
"Storage." What an innovative new term for "Lost and Found."

(Reply to this)


[info]deviantdesade
2009-01-02 04:15 pm UTC (link)
seriously, go hang out with a group of pompous brits.

I lol'd. Apparently telling someone to jump the pond is the new go to hell. Who knew?

(Reply to this)


[info]tachikoma01
2009-01-02 07:23 pm UTC (link)
I have to admit that I **am** a bit confused by the issue of how he got the guitar there but couldn't get it home, because:

If he walked over with the guitar, he could have walked home with the guitar in one hand and the bike handle in the other. He'd probably smack his legs with the peddles a few times, but it works.

If he bussed over, most buses (at least where I am) have bike racks. So he could bus both the guitar and the bike home.

If he came by car the previous day but not the second day, why didn't he call ahead to find out if they had it before taking a mode of transportation he knew he couldn't take it home with?

I need to stop thinking so much.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]tehrin, 2009-01-03 11:44 am UTC

[info]serai
2009-01-04 07:10 am UTC (link)
I'm thinking it must be a hell of a tiny space there if "everybody" keeps tripping on the guitar. What, no shelves anywhere?

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mrbimble, 2009-01-05 07:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]lirazel, 2009-01-06 04:12 pm UTC

[info]annepackrat
2009-01-12 05:29 am UTC (link)
Edit: What exactly can you get from starbucks that's $1.55 anyways?

A single unit of creamer?

(Reply to this)


 
   
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