How the hell do you "demote" a bridesmaid? Does Simon from American Idol show up to excoriate her for her clear lack of fashion sense or her tragic inability to distinguish between paste and diamonds? Is there a ritual de-bouqueting in the manner of a Klingon discommendation?

I'm intensely curious now. Also grateful for my tattoo shop handfasting. Having a former Marine Corps sniper/Hell's Angel preside over your ceremony ensures everyone is on their best behavior.