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demonbean
2009-01-22 05:41 am UTC (link)

I have read more wedding etiquette, general etiquette, wedding tradition, wedding magazine, wedding planning, advice columns, and other wedding related minutia than most brides ever see, and have participated in ceremonies of Christian, non-religious, Jewish, and Hindu traditions, and also make veils for my friends who are getting married. I’ve also helped decorated and do at least a small something in almost every wedding I’ve been to. So, I have a lot of experience with weddings. If it’s been done, I’ve probably at least read about it. It’s an obsession of mine (as I’m sure you’ve realized)

No matter what the etiquette dictates, being a histrionic bitch is not okay. That is all.

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	singe 2009-01-22 06:30 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, I'm getting a crazy Martha Stewart vibe there. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	caito 2009-01-22 08:41 am UTC (link)
	Etiquette specifically dictates against being a histrionic bitch, I thought. I mean, isn't that the whole point of etiquette? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	jupiterpluvius 2009-01-23 02:25 am UTC (link)
	Politeness is to do and say The kindest things in the nicest way I'm Rhymey McDoggerel tonight for some reason. (Reply to this)(Parent)

kookaburra
2009-01-22 10:56 am UTC (link)

This reminds me of a letter to Miss Manners I read once, where the writer was asking all of these questions about different traditions, pre-wedding festivities, and trousseaus, and it all finally boiled down to asking what were the absolute NECESSITIES for a bride to have, so she could make sure that her family/friends provided these things.

Judith Martin's answer? To wit: "A bridegroom."

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	hallidae 2009-01-22 05:48 pm UTC (link)
	BEAUTIFUL. (Reply to this)(Parent)

catmoran
2009-01-22 06:45 pm UTC (link)

I adore Miss Manners. She made a wedding etiquette video that was my lifeline to sanity.

There were a few very over-the-top* little skits of people trying to KEEP EVERYTHING TRADITIONAL OMG, with her cutting in and basically saying, "[Thing a] is traditional! Do it, have fun -- just remember that other people's feelings trumps tradition! ^_^ [Thing b] is just someone trying to rip you off, but feel free if you're independently wealthy. And invite me, I want to see it."

* They were over the top back in 1990. Now it's just stuff you see every day on those Bridezilla shows.

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	kookaburra 2009-01-22 07:33 pm UTC (link)
	I am such a fangirl. I have most of her books, and still refer to them often. Witty, entertaining, and they have seen me through some of the most difficult situations of my life. huggles them The bridal shows make me want to become a nun. So much STRESS! How do they keep up that level of intensity for so long over so many things? (Reply to this)(Parent)

	rimrunner 2009-01-23 04:12 am UTC (link)
	That's in her Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, and it's my most favorite Miss Manners response EVER. (Closely followed by her reply to the guy who wrote in about female business associates who would insist on picking up the tab at lunch. "What's she trying to do," he asked, "prove that she's my equal?" The response: "Yes.") (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kookaburra 2009-01-23 04:53 am UTC (link)
	Heeee, I remember that one too! Fantastic. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	bubosquared 2009-01-23 10:46 am UTC (link)
	My personal favourite Miss Manners response was to a reader asking what s/he should say when being introduced to a gay couple. Answer: "'How do you do.' 'How do you do.'" Miss Manners is subtly snarky LOVE! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	kijikun 2009-01-23 09:42 pm UTC (link)
	Dude I want a link to that. :) (Reply to this)(Parent)

	watersword 2009-01-24 04:10 pm UTC (link)
	Personally, I've always loved "How does one walk in high-heeled shoes?" "Left, right, left, right, left, right." Oooh, I wonder if there's an RSS feed.... (Reply to this)(Parent)

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